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Anonymous (97)
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Advice on dealing with feelings of loneliness and paranoia

I'm having a hard time dealing with feelings of profound loneliness and paranoia about the states of friendships which in turn affect my dreams and my moods (being a vivid dreamer) and I don't like the affect it has on my happiness. Is there any good literature or advice that you can give to help me conquer these feelings and appreciate what I have in my friends or branch out to finding others? Any communication advice to being clear with friends and alleviating my paranoia without insulting them or sounding weird? [more inside]
posted by Recca on Jan 22, 2013 - 6 answers

Relationship; and the one with her Male Friend

At the beginning of the relationship, she had asked to be exclusive. Told me she wants me to be her boyfriend. Thing's were going great. She mentions that she has a male friend visiting from out of town. Wasn't a big deal for me. Then it comes to light that he would be staying at her place for the weekend. [more inside]
posted by Nicholas Geary on Jan 2, 2013 - 120 answers

Me or relationship.

How do I decide whether this relationship is worth staying and working on or leaving and working on myself? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 30, 2012 - 31 answers

Kindle self-help book recommendations

Looking for recommendations of effective books/workbooks/web resources on emotional intelligence, abandonment issues, anger, fear, jealousy, trust issues and self-compassion. Bonus points for including all of the above and being available on Kindle. [more inside]
posted by f3l1x on Dec 30, 2012 - 6 answers

the L word

how can i learn to love myself and be more self-confident in my relationship? [more inside]
posted by happyjuice on Dec 17, 2012 - 9 answers

You lying asshole.

So I'm on a performance plan at work due to dishonesty. Please help me turn this around. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 14, 2012 - 53 answers

How does an anxious person learn to trust their instincts?

What are some good hacks for figuring out whether my feelings in a given situation are a result of unhealthy anxiety or healthy intuition? [more inside]
posted by rockpaperdynamite on Nov 25, 2012 - 12 answers

Learning to know myself, and grow myself.

How do I learn to trust (and know) myself? [more inside]
posted by freeform on Nov 4, 2012 - 11 answers

Ethical conundrum

A first draft document (press release) I emailed to a new colleague for reaction and comment in a new organization I volunteer for was headed 'for your eyes only', 'confidential", and "not for release." It was copied and distributed to others and a reply to me with the explanation, "I assumed you intended others in the group to see it." My disappointment stings. My trust non-existant. While I was highly motivated to do this volunteer work, in something I believe in and value, I fear future experiences will be as frustrating and discouraging as this one. Anyone ever have similar experiences? Options seem to me to 1. ignore it, 2. Confront directly, 3. Resign.
posted by NorthCoastCafe on Nov 4, 2012 - 31 answers

Why trust other people?

I have just ended a long term relationship due to a breach of trust. This has, however, added to my increasing lack of trust in other people -- which was little to begin with. Why should and how do I learn to trust people again? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 31, 2012 - 15 answers

Last Will and Testament of the an Artist

Artists, what will happen to your writings music and artworks if/when you die? Any ideas? Do you have a will, and a clause with some legal language? [more inside]
posted by shipbreaker on Oct 17, 2012 - 18 answers

Can a healthy marriage last?

How do I regain my trust in marriage when my role models of healthy marriage are separating? [more inside]
posted by horizonseeker on Oct 5, 2012 - 16 answers

Help me tell daughter Santa Claus truth

Help me tell 8 year old the truth about Santa [more inside]
posted by lynnie-the-pooh on Sep 30, 2012 - 33 answers

How do I re-establish trust my long-term relationship after a lie?

How do I re-establish trust my long-term relationship after a lie? [more inside]
posted by otempora on Sep 25, 2012 - 36 answers

40 acres and a huge personal liability

My friend owns a property jointly with several other family members. What are his options for 1) limiting his liability 2) optimizing the legal/tax situation for hypothetically putting capital improvements into the property and 3) optimizing the legal/tax situation for transferring ownership when a part-owner passes away or sells their interest? [more inside]
posted by Wretch729 on Sep 18, 2012 - 1 answer

How can I work on my own trust issues without continuing to pester my SO?

How can I work on my own trust issues without continuing to pester my SO? [more inside]
posted by Pomo on Sep 10, 2012 - 19 answers

How can I encourage my friend to come out of his shell?

O wisest MeFites, do you have any ideas about how to foster intimacy in a friendship with someone who is emotionally guarded and shut down? [more inside]
posted by strelitzia on Aug 15, 2012 - 26 answers

Therapist's professional boundaries in conflict with school's request--help?

How do I deal with the conflict between my therapist's professional boundaries and the information my college wants? Also, how to deal with the trust issues this is creating? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 12, 2012 - 19 answers

I'm in love, how do I not go crazy?

I love her and she loves me. Help me not lose my goddamn mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 28, 2012 - 10 answers

How to get over feelings of betrayal and build trust again in my marriage.

I want to get over feelings of betrayal and build trust again in my marriage. How do I bring it up to my husband? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 21, 2012 - 25 answers

So, is my reputation tarnished forever?

If I lie (a very big lie), can I ever redeem myself? [more inside]
posted by raintree on Jun 15, 2012 - 41 answers

How do I get over jealousy in a relationship?

I can't trust my girlfriend. I haven't been able to trust past girlfriends. Help? (snowflake details ahead) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 11, 2012 - 27 answers

You are not my estate lawyer, finance lady, or tax guy. Can you help me find that person?

Grandma set up an uneven trust and we want to distribute it equally. Who do we talk to and what do we ask them? Questions about imbalanced inheritances, DIY redistribution of wealth, and taxes within... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 1, 2012 - 14 answers

Property Trust, LLC or Quick Deed?

Property transfer from Father to Son. Should we do a simple quick deed, LLC, or set up a trust? One attonrney reccomended the LLC, another said a trust is "safer", what does MeFi think? Thank you! [more inside]
posted by 1inabillionmistake on Apr 4, 2012 - 6 answers

Sooo...trust and attachment issues, anyone?

It seems I'm incapable of becoming attached to individuals or trusting them. Help? [more inside]
posted by jumelle on Apr 1, 2012 - 41 answers

Am I subconsciously trying to destroy my LTR?

Am I subconsciously trying to destroy my LTR? (Long) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2012 - 66 answers

Is this a red flag or just a pink one?

Should I be concerned about this minor but weird apparent untruth by my SO, or let it go? [more inside]
posted by Pomo on Mar 25, 2012 - 53 answers

How to love when love can be taken away from you at any time?

After a recent and unexpected breakup, I'm starting to feel like relationships can end at any time, and finding it hard to imagine letting myself love again. Help me figure out a healthier way to think about dating in general. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 22, 2012 - 22 answers

Should I give up on friendship?

I am angry at everyone who tries to be friendly with me because of a repeated thing that has happened to me socially and with my family as well. I really don't want to become bitter and friendless but I either feel like I'm putting on an act or I get angry. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 22, 2012 - 19 answers

Should my mother's mechanic have caught a failing fuel pump earlier?

Should my mother's mechanic have caught a failing fuel pump when he repaired a closely related relay? [more inside]
posted by aaronbeekay on Mar 21, 2012 - 10 answers

Help me figure out what's going on

Needing advice from an estate lawyer or someone with thorough knowledge of how trusts work. [more inside]
posted by northxnorthwest on Mar 21, 2012 - 15 answers

how to trust?

why do people say to you "you can tell me anything" when they don't really mean it? [more inside]
posted by timsneezed on Mar 2, 2012 - 20 answers

"I think that we may safely trust a good deal more than we do." --Thoreau

I want to buy a widget in Fayette, AL in the next few days. I am not there, don't know anyone there, and can't get there. Am I out of luck? [more inside]
posted by RolandOfEld on Feb 8, 2012 - 8 answers

My GF cheated on me. How do I get to a point of clarity so I can make a decision?

Girlfriend of 3 years got blackout drunk slept with a random acquaintance while on a business trip. I need tips, methods and advice to find clarity so I can make a good decision, rather than one of impulse. I'll do my best to keep this brief, but, well, these things have details: [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 31, 2012 - 107 answers

Not sure if it's trust or communication that's the problem here.

If my boyfriend says he's coming home late by txt, and I want to know more basic information, like who he's hanging out with, maybe also where, how can I communicate my need to know (for my own peace of mind) without coming off as insecure or controlling? [more inside]
posted by Sa Dec on Jan 27, 2012 - 86 answers

How can I get over this breach of trust?

How to get over a serious breach of trust that is not infidelity? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2011 - 28 answers

Do I keep dating this guy?

Do I keep dating this guy? [more inside]
posted by dolce_voce on Dec 10, 2011 - 21 answers

How much trust should be given in a new relationship?

How much trust should be given in a new relationship? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 9, 2011 - 27 answers

Can a 3 year relationship survive a break after trust is broken (not infidelity...but almost)?

Can a 3 year relationship survive a break after trust is broken (not infidelity...but almost)? [more inside]
posted by fezzle on Dec 8, 2011 - 38 answers

Sex and Love.

How do you get over the shock and pain of discovering you've been sleeping with someone who hasn't been in love with you for months? [more inside]
posted by These Birds of a Feather on Nov 15, 2011 - 13 answers

When long distance love crosses the borderline disorder.

The girl I love, who wants to be my wife, is 3,000 miles away from me. She is/was a cutter, may have Borderline (BPD) and lives in a country that I don't trust their mental health system. What should I do until I get her to America and a qualified therapist? OR how do I let her go gently? [more inside]
posted by DaftMythic on Nov 6, 2011 - 38 answers

Opportunities for Writers

How likely is it that writer A contacts an agent with a writing idea, which the agent rejects from writer A but then encourages writer B, who agent knows, to write it? [more inside]
posted by CollectiveMind on Nov 6, 2011 - 12 answers

About those "reformed" ex-boyfriends and girlfriends..

Reformed exes- "suck it and see", or leave it alone? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 16, 2011 - 22 answers

Can I get a jump?

I feel like I'm stuck in that awkward phase of a relationship between dating and when things become serious. I'm ready for something more. I'm not sure my boyfriend is, and I'm concerned. Snowflakes abound. [more inside]
posted by erstwhile on Oct 15, 2011 - 20 answers

No, trust ME. Please.

How do you deal with anti-intellectualism in a spouse? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 4, 2011 - 45 answers

Creepy or Nice? How to tell the difference!

Dating Filter: Is he creepy or just nice? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 19, 2011 - 71 answers

I don't trust my trustee.

This is a question about an inherited estate and a trustee that I suspect is not acting in my best interests. [more inside]
posted by tiny plastic sockpuppet on Aug 18, 2011 - 5 answers

How can I help my husband help himself?

How can I support my husband as he works through some issues? [more inside]
posted by your mom's a sock puppet on Jul 22, 2011 - 13 answers

I have trouble trusting and I need help

Yes, I have trust issues and I don't think my girlfriend is helping any... I'm ready for therapy... what can I expect, what can I do to make it the most helpful, and what can I do to preserve my relationship through this -- or should I? [more inside]
posted by doompuppy on Jul 18, 2011 - 32 answers

What's it like when it's nice?

What are the nice aspects of becoming intimate with a "romantic partner"? What does it feel like when it's a healthy situation? Can you give me some examples of things that are nice about sharing your life in an intimate way with your partner? [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Jul 13, 2011 - 24 answers

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