Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with surprises

But what's it there for? Do you actually sleep on it?

lunalaguna — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 08:37:30 -0800

Little known facts about men My boyfriend was shocked (shocked!) recently when I told him that many women's bathrooms have couches or chairs in them. I was surprised no one had ever told him this before, or that he'd never been in a women's bathroom. (I've had jobs where I've cleaned men's bathrooms, so that world is no secret to me.)

It got me wondering whether there are certain facts about men or common experiences they have that I'm totally unaware of as a woman. Guys, are there things you encounter pretty regularly that a women would know nothing about? Girls, have you ever learned something about men that's both common and surprising?

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.

rinosaur — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 10:09:51 -0800

Help me keep a friend's spirits up during October! My very best friend in the world has to work every day of next month at her already soul-crushing job. I'll be sending her some mail throughout the month and other little things like that, but I want to think of one special little thing I can do for her for each of the five weekends she'll have to work while the rest of our group is off enjoying all the fall activities there are to be had.

Ideas so far are hand delivering a cupcake one day, showing up to take her to lunch, sending fake flowers (or real), or leaving something for her at her house for her after a long weekend work day. The only caveat is that she works in a heavily secured building, so I won't be able to get access to her desk without her knowing it. Potential inspiration - fall is her very favorite season, and I feel like she'll be missing out on some of the fun, so fall-themed ideas are extra special!

Thanks everyone!

Romantic yet awesome?

WidgetAlley — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:27:39 -0800

Feelin' in the gift-giving mood for my dearest boy. Am not so much feeling the ideas, for once. Suggestions? So it's almost finals time around here, and my college-age love and I are about to be absolutely swamped. I haven't done anything to surprise him in a really long time, and I would love to get or make him something little but nice for after finals, especially since he will be gone for two weeks after school ends. But, with the stress of studying and everything else, I am drawing a complete blank. What have you done for your loved one in the past, and do you have any suggestions? Romantic is good. Freakin' awesome is better.

Background: I am a hardcore student with artistic leanings, have been involved in theatre, and a love of foreign languages. He is a music major (trombone and bass), also with a love of languages, a professional mechanic, an amateur blacksmith, carpenter, and anything else that involves taking things apart or doing things with his hands. He loves things obscure and/or homemade.

Previous gifts have included: a St. Brigid's cross necklace (patron saint of smiths), books I thought he would like, awesome vintage coats, a homemade leather flogger for Christmas after he mentioned wanting to try something new in bed.

As always, hivemind, thanking you in advance!

How do I plan for surprises?

PoopyDoop — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 15:37:19 -0800

I saw the movie Dan in Real Life yesterday, and the last line of the movie... ... was "Plan for surprises". How do I do that? I'd like to be more open to situations and people, in particular women. I've been divorced and single for awhile (ok, a long while) and I find I've gotten too guarded and too insulated in my own little world. There's been a number of times where I've blown off signals from women, because either I wasn't expecting it and/or I couldn't make up my mind whether I wanted to take it to the next step (whatever that tired cliche means).

So how do I make room for new people in my life? How do I "plan for surprises"?

Would my roommate's boyfriend's surprise appearance be unwanted?

Anonymous — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 08:20:37 -0800

My roommate's long-distance boyfriend asked me to help him surprise her. But I'm afraid he might be the one who gets surprised, if she's sleeping with someone else (I'm not sure). What do I do? My roommate and I have been living together since September. We were assigned randomly (last year of college) and did not know each other before then. We get along well and are friendly, but we aren't friends.

She is from the opposite coast, and is in a long-distance relationship with a guy who still lives there. In October, he came to visit for about five days. I met him briefly and said hi, but we didn't talk. He stayed in her room (we have separate bedrooms). Everything seemed to be going well: they went out every night, she put tons of pictures of them together on Facebook, and they had loud (although brief) sex every night.

Earlier this week, he called me out of the blue and asked for my help. He wants to surprise my roommate by appearing one morning, but because the apartment we share is in a college dorm, he will need me to go downstairs, sign him in with security, and bring him up to the apartment we share. He will be flying in early Saturday morning and flying out late Saturday night (his family has a ton of money, much more than either she or I do). I thought this was an awesome, romantic idea and he was amazingly sweet and dedicated to think of it and to be willing to give up so much (not just money, but a lot of time and effort) to make it happen, so I agreed without a second thought.

Tonight my roommate brought another guy into the apartment late at night, made dinner for him, and hung out with him for hours, talking/joking about a lot of things, including explicit sex talk. Their conversation didn't include any obvious reasons for his presence (e.g. both foodies, or he wanted to learn how to make this meal, etc.). I thought I heard a few sounds of kisses, but they were cooking, so it could have been something else? This was all in the shared area, where I couldn't help overhearing. They also spent some time inside her room. At one point when they were in the kitchen, I went in pretending to get something. Nothing obvious was going on, but they were clearly physically comfortable with each other (touching, standing against each other when I tried to get by in a crowded space).

I have really good guy friends of my own, so I know that could be all he is, but among other things, we live so far away that friends don't want to come over -- they'll ask to meet at their places, or somewhere in between. Literally, in 3.5 months, neither of us has ever had anyone but sex partners visit the apartment. Between that, the late-night circumstances, the possible kissing . . . it seems to add up. But one thing against that interpretation is that when she was having sex with her boyfriend, she was very loud, but when she and this guy were alone in her room, I didn't hear anything, so that argues they were watching a movie or something not sexual. Still, if she was single, I would definitely assume that this was a date.

As it is, I have no idea what's going on. Maybe she's just realized she likes this guy better, and she's waiting to break up with the boyfriend in person when she goes back home for winter break. Maybe she's getting a little on the side and not planning on telling her boyfriend. Maybe she's sleeping with other guys so she can call her boyfriend and tell him every last detail while he jerks off. Maybe she's not even sleeping with this guy! Whatever it is, it's none of my business, and I wouldn't care at all if I hadn't agreed to help her boyfriend go to such great lengths to surprise her.

So what do I do? Call the boyfriend back and be like "You may want to reconsider"? Ask the roommate if she's interested in the new guy, and look incredibly offensively snoopy if they're just friends? Keep my mouth shut, go along with the plan, and have them both absolutely furious with me if she's done with him? The boyfriend is coming this Saturday, the 15th, and I'm sure he already has the plane tickets -- I have to decide fast!

The web most miraculous

kk — Wed, 18 May 2005 09:59:51 -0800

I'm looking for surprises about the web that few would have expected 10 years ago. Like Google maps, with satellite images. Or that "view your block" option on Amazon. There are indeed many marvelous benefits on the www. What is a most unexpected feature on the web today that would have seemed 'unrealistic' to expect just 10 years ago? I'm looking for the non-obvious.