209 posts tagged with single.
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I'll go build my own marriage, with blackjack and hookers

I want to shift my focus from trying to find a partner to preparing for a life without one. What should I start doing now so that all my years will be happy and healthy? [more inside]
posted by unannihilated on Oct 19, 2015 - 25 answers

Compromise... how does that work?

I am madly in love with my boyfriend and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. But I also desperately miss being single and only being responsible to and for myself. I'm not sure how to cope with this; I don't know whether it's going to get better on its own as we get better at communicating with each other, whether I'm just going to gradually get used to the status quo, or whether I need to mourn that loss of independence and move on with my (generally pretty great) new life (maybe all three). [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 3, 2015 - 16 answers

Am I a horrible person if I don't go to my cousin's wedding?

I'm going to have to go alone to the wedding of my much younger cousin, which will cost me a fortune, and where my newly married former flame will me. Is it really bad if I just make up a white lie and not go? [more inside]
posted by Duchess Sock McPuppeterson on Aug 1, 2015 - 49 answers

Should I keep talking to this guy?

I'm having trouble discerning if this guy is worthy of my time or not as I feel like I'm into him. We've been texting each other for a couple of weeks and met up once in person. He's very funny and we seemed to have mutual values and clicked well through our convo. He texts me a lot everyday yet he never calls. He said he's not a fan of talking on the phone. [more inside]
posted by missybitsy on Jul 12, 2015 - 42 answers

Want to be in more friend circles, but having trouble connecting...

Hi AskMe: I'm a 34-year-old single female, quite introverted, not really having a tight circle of friends until my breakup from my only relationship 2 years ago. I have one main circle of friends, many of whom I got to know from going to a board game meetup. While I enjoy socializing with the group over dining out and some board games, I sometimes feel uncomfortable with venting to people in my main circle as a sounding board because of some past internal group misunderstanding as well as drama involving the former "group leader" arising from a breakup he suffered (where the fact I asked said group leader out and got rejected did not help at all) and some new group members coming in whom I feel like I enjoy in limited doses only. So I feel like I need to find more circle of friends while keeping the existing circle--with some friends being more people whom I can confide to--except... [more inside]
posted by Tsukushi on Jun 28, 2015 - 7 answers

How can I cope with losing a friendship that maybe was not good?

How and when to let go of a friend? And should I let go of a friend? [more inside]
posted by bananaskin on Jun 9, 2015 - 12 answers

Is dating for men easier in SF or NYC?

I'm a 30-year-old straight single guy, debating a move to either NYC or SF. Singledom has been getting tiresome (after 6+ months), and I'd be interested in knowing whether dating would be substantially better or easier in one or the other city. I'm a slightly nerdy (but by no-means super-geeky) and fairly athletic/outdoorsy highly-educated professional. In either city, I'd be living in or near the urban center. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 26, 2015 - 14 answers

Mixed signals from a guy - Is he still interested in me?

A couple of months ago, I met this guy (22 yo) through a mutual friend at a dinner party. Let's call him Josh. We seemed to click well. He didn't ask for my number but he added me on Facebook and started messaging me everyday for about 2 weeks. At the time, he was living in a different city so he didn't ask me out but he did suggest that I should come hang out with him and the mutual friend again. Our convo was mostly about school (nothing flirtatious). I sensed that he ended the convo because we ran out of things to talk about. [more inside]
posted by missybitsy on May 18, 2015 - 16 answers

Little known American city perfect for a lone woman of colour tourist?

I would like to visit a city in the US that is not commonly thought of as a vacation destination, but still has a lot to offer a tourist. However, as a woman of colour that does not drive and will be travelling alone, I would like a safe and friendly choice. I would like ideas for places with a lot of history and fine dining, which are easy to travel by foot/ public transportation, and friendly towards different looking people. Examples of what I am and am not looking for inside... [more inside]
posted by partly squamous and partly rugose on May 17, 2015 - 26 answers

How to cope with my terror of uncertainty in my mid-20s

How do I enjoy and make the most of my life, when it is so full of uncertainty? What are some strategies for tolerating and living with uncertainty, rather than being afraid of and fighting it? Details/specific situation inside [more inside]
posted by armadillo1224 on May 6, 2015 - 25 answers

I'll take a home in the woods by myself, if I can

I'm a fairly experienced camper, but I've never gone alone, so I booked a solo trip to spend a week in the woods this summer. I have some stuff (lantern, propane stove, mess kit, sleeping bag) but I'm missing most of the basics: a single person tent, mattress pad, food, mosquito gear. What do I need? What will I want? Once I get out there, what will I be shaking my fist at the uncaring sky for if I forget to bring it along? [more inside]
posted by divined by radio on Apr 22, 2015 - 26 answers

Pets for people with little time but big hearts

What are some breeds/animals that fill that newly single lonely-feeling, but are compatible with a busy workday? A few details and I get emotional inside. [more inside]
posted by bbqturtle on Apr 10, 2015 - 40 answers

How do single low-income / working-class Canadians save for the future?

Hello all. I am a low-income mid-30s Canadian living alone, no dependents. Advice from bank staff and popular internet blogs confuse me and don't make sense in my world (e.g. ensure an 8-10% return - but how do I do that without jeopardizing my future if I retire in a decade the investment does poorly). I feel some investments I made were silly but am not sure if I am paranoid. Please suggest good directions to explore. I will give specifics about my situation below, with my specific question in the last paragraph. [more inside]
posted by partly squamous and partly rugose on Mar 16, 2015 - 20 answers

Single parent dating: I want to start meeting nice men again

A long time has passed since I posted here, and a lot has happened in that long time. Quick update is that now I am legally divorced. I also got laid off last year and thankfully was able to find another great job quickly. Moved to NYC, which is a fantastic city and I went to school here so have a lot more friends here than when I was in Boston. Anyway, so I want to date. I don’t know if I want to get into a serious relationship just yet, but I just want to share my life with someone and do fun things on weekends. Where do I meet responsible, loving, educated men who would want to date me? I haven’t seen anyone in two years (since separation/divorce)… I think I should change that… [more inside]
posted by Spice_and_Ice on Dec 31, 2014 - 12 answers

So I'm the common denominator, right?

I'm struggling with the idea of not internalizing rejection and trying to come to terms with why I've had so much trouble with relationships in a romantic context. Normally I'm able to make really good decisions, but for some reasons with relationships I seem to be hitting the proverbial brick wall. Please classify my snowflake. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 14 answers

Do I REALLY need to take a break from dating?

I know I "should" take a break from dating, but I don't want to. Why "should" I? Snowflakery follows [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Nov 29, 2014 - 27 answers

How Can I Find A Girlfriend In College, Really?

I’m not entirely sure where to post this on the Internet, because it seems that there are a million different opinions out there. It’s like asking, what’s the best diet to lose weight, when everyone will tell you his or her favorite diet. Regardless, I need some help. I need some guidance, a model to follow. I need to know how to get laid and/or a girlfriend. Preferably, a girlfriend. [more inside]
posted by ggp88 on Oct 31, 2014 - 107 answers

Reconcile me to singledom

Tell me, how does one give up on a desire that's been there since childhood - to be in a long-term healthy loving domestic relationship? How do you work out how to plan the rest of your life when the only person you're working for is you? [more inside]
posted by b33j on Sep 13, 2014 - 39 answers

You should give up/ try harder/ love yourself/ lower your standards

What is with the constant insistence to single people that they would meet someone if they just did X, Y, or Z? [more inside]
posted by rhymeswithcheery on Sep 13, 2014 - 49 answers

Calling all single dads..I need your advice.

I'm crushing on a single dad, how do I go about this? [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Aug 8, 2014 - 33 answers

Help me enjoy 34

How can I stop panicking about turning 34 and still single? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 5, 2014 - 15 answers

Help me deal with being the weird single guy in my group of friends

I am newly single, against my will. In the next two months, half of my friends are getting married. Everyone else I know is in a long term relationship. I am the, like, seventeenth wheel. I have absolutely no interest in ever being in a relationship again until the sun burns out. Please help me not feel really weird around my friends. [more inside]
posted by deathpanels on Aug 3, 2014 - 31 answers

single-hood wasted on the single?

What do you or did you enjoy about being single? What do partnered mefites miss? [more inside]
posted by morganw on Jul 10, 2014 - 88 answers

A question about parenthood from a single, childless guy

I am in my early forties, single and childless. Many of my peers have opted to marry and have babies. I don't see myself joining them any time soon but I'd like to understand them a little better. So what are the aspects of parenthood that single, childless people (men in particular) Just Don't Get? [more inside]
posted by jason's_planet on Jun 1, 2014 - 27 answers

Why Do I Do This To Myself?

Need attention from guys to feel sane. Feel miserable when in a long term relationship, but when single, want to feel liked by someone just so I can reject them. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME and where do I turn for help? Lots more details inside. I promise I will try to nutshell. [more inside]
posted by camylanded on May 20, 2014 - 18 answers

My twenties are wasting away and I'm unhappy, how can I be happier?

I'm almost 26, and I don't have the relationship I wanted to have my this age. Being single is starting to feel like a waste of life, and I don't know what to do. [more inside]
posted by summertimesadness1988 on Apr 11, 2014 - 82 answers

Happy 40th Birthday to Me!

I'm a single woman who will be celebrating her 40th birthday this December. I've decided to go away, specifically on a scuba trip. (I plan to get certified in May.) Please help me plan a single friendly birthday scuba trip. [more inside]
posted by miss-lapin on Mar 27, 2014 - 13 answers

Depressed & need inspiration.

I am a single mother, down in the dumps and looking for mefites for a lightbulb or maybe just a bone. I've been juggling my post-divorce financial mess, toxic workplace, toxic people all around, and I'm so tired and exhausted, I just know my six-year old and I need to be somewhere where the atmosphere is more laid back with better quality of life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 9, 2014 - 13 answers

What should a single girl do on Valentine's Day?

I have a killer red dress, and I really want to go out and wear it on Valentine's Day somewhere. But where? [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Feb 8, 2014 - 12 answers

Single, nearly 35, feeling profoundly alone and terrified.

I'm having a real bad night and pretty bad month or so. I'm trying to stay optimistic but it's so, so hard. Any kind words and support will help. [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Jan 24, 2014 - 37 answers

Fascinating, geeky single-topic web sites from the 90s/early 00s?

I was thinking back to high school, when I spent hours browsing archives such as the Jargon File, the d20 SRD, and bash.org. Of course, these are just scratching the surface - I read pages and pages of D+D files, funny anecdotes, and interesting stories on personal sites. I miss the magic of diving into a site like that - any recommendations?
posted by LSK on Jan 13, 2014 - 12 answers

All the single gentlemen, SF version

How do I meet single men in their 30s in SF? [more inside]
posted by so much modern time on Dec 17, 2013 - 16 answers

Relationships - how to decide if they're worth the effort?

I haven't been in an LTR in years. I'm in my early thirties, strongly introverted and don't have many friends, so its not a surprise that I haven't met "the one" yet. Everyone I know seems to be getting married and having babies, which has prompted me to wonder if I'd like to do the same. To be honest I'm not sure if it is worth the effort of dressing up, and going on lots of dates to find a guy, and then having to maintain a relationship (I'm not good with people) or whether I should accept that I am different to the others, and just focus on being happily single. For the singletons: did you ever consciously decide to stay single, or did it just happen? If you decided, how did you make that choice? For the coupled-up: Have you ever considered being single long-term, and if so why did you reject that idea? Did you consciously choose to find a partner or did you just meet them by accident (e.g. online dating vs meeting when you least expected it) Hope that all makes sense!
posted by EatMyHat on Dec 14, 2013 - 28 answers

New relationship - advice on meeting her child for the first time?

Never had children of my own - how do I handle meeting a new partner's child for the first time? [more inside]
posted by de void on Dec 3, 2013 - 15 answers

Age 25. Huge college debt. Can't land a better job. What should I do?

I have $40,000+ in debt, a bachelors degree in criminal justice, an EMT-B license, a basic computer tech certificate, 4 years of customer service experience as a banquet server, a bad driving history, and one misdemeanor - how can I find a better job than being a banquet server? What can I do to be competitive? Should I attend police academy or not? What are my options - what can I do to improve my life? [more inside]
posted by usersname on Nov 9, 2013 - 49 answers

Overwhelming need for intimacy.

I've been really lonely the past year or two, and it's been very overwhelming how much I've missed being with someone. I romanticize women I come across and it always leads to disappointment. How do I stop doing this? [more inside]
posted by morning_television on Nov 4, 2013 - 18 answers

Help me date myself

I went through a pretty wretched breakup of a long-term relationship earlier this year and am still dealing with the ill effects. I'm not interested in dating anyone, or rather don't think I should date anyone, for a while. But I'm getting really into the idea of dating myself. Please help me come up with ideas to do that! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 14, 2013 - 21 answers

Ideas for a solo trip in North America in early December?

I scheduled a week off from work in early December and am interested in suggestions for solo travel. I'm in Chicago, and I have enough airline miles for a round trip in the US or Canada, and would be looking to go somewhere for 4 or 5 days. I'm not much of a beach person, and I am most comfortable in an urban setting, though I wouldn't be opposed to a day trip for hiking or some sort of outdoorsy stuff. I'm from Chicago so cold weather doesn't phase me. I love museums, architecture, walking tours, casual (but awesome) restaurants, and bars; I would prefer somewhere where I don't have to rent a car to get around. Thanks in advance for the suggestions!
posted by bdk3clash on Oct 14, 2013 - 18 answers

Self-help books that will help me make peace with being single?

I'm tired of feeling bitter about being single. Are there any self-help books that will help me get over this? [more inside]
posted by tumbleweedjack on Oct 7, 2013 - 11 answers

What assistance is available for a single mom in a difficult situation?

I have a good friend who has gone through a very rough 16 year marriage/divorce - experiencing both verbal and physical abuse. She currently has four children living with her, 3 of them are under the age of 18, 1 is 19, and 1 infant grandchild. As a friend I would like to provide all the help and information that can be offered. But I have no idea were to start... She resides in Arizona - she has a minimum wage job and works around 30 hours a week. Her 17 year old son works part time at a fast food place. (Her ex-husband does not pay any child support). She said that she checked on housing assistance but that there was a one year waiting list (I have a feeling she really has not checked). And advice or links will be greatly appreciated...
posted by strongdad on Oct 1, 2013 - 16 answers

Does happy lifelong singledom exist?

At 30 and after almost a decade of being unable to click with anyone at a romantic level, I'm starting to consider the possibility of my having to live as a single for the rest of the journey. Not that I plan to quit trying in the near future, but given the poor results so far, I am trying to imagine and anticipate what perpetual singledom may be, especially as one grows older. My questions are related to the possibilities for happiness, fulfillment and emotional stability while chronically single. Are they real? Do you think a person can be alone all his/her life and have a meaningful and fulfilling life? I have a clear sense of what sort of contributions I want to try to make to my environment and society, but I wonder if this purpose will be enough to keep my life motivation burning as I get older supposing that I do stay alone. [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Sep 29, 2013 - 23 answers

I need tips for surviving a really hard breakup. With children.

Summary: I still love my children's father. We had a lot of problems in the four years we were together, but the last year or so I truly thought everything was getting better and we were happy. Then he suddenly broke up with me. And last night, he pocket-dialed me from a new girlfriend's house where I got to hear all the gushy giggly happy voices that used to be mine, as well as some x-rated stuff I am now trying to burn out of my memory. How am I supposed to cope with this? The only way I've ever gotten over an ex is to go no-contact, and rid my home/environment/live of everything that could possibly remind me of them; but, we have two small children together. I am going to have to look at his face three times a week for the next eighteen years, let alone the daily reminder of the children themselves, and I don't know how I'm going to cope. I'm in a horrible mental place right now and have no resources. Please help me. [more inside]
posted by celtalitha on Sep 13, 2013 - 40 answers

Strong Single Woman? Is there like...Cliff notes for this or something?

I'm single again. I know...KNOW that I MUST learn how to be OK with myself single. I crave being that strong, single women that people are drawn to and admire. But I'm to the point that I can't just say "I'm amazing!" and *snaps fingers* everything is peachy keen again. I need some specific things to do in order to move forward, distract myself from my loneliness, and learn to like being single. Can you add to the list of things to do? Come on in! [more inside]
posted by MultiFaceted on Aug 16, 2013 - 26 answers

How To Keep My Morale Up When I've Never Had Any Type Of Relationship

How can I cope with the weight of being single pretty much my whole life (29 years old) - it's wearing me down and killing my self esteem. A few snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 27, 2013 - 19 answers

Where can I meet single dads (parents) for dating?

I've been trying online dating, having been a single mom for a few years now, but I'm not finding very many single dads out there. Where are they? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jul 14, 2013 - 12 answers

OKCupid reality check for a new dater

I’m a late-30’s woman trying OKCupid for the first time. Can you give me general advice, some tips on keeping my expectations realistic, and suggestions to avoid getting too much of my self-esteem tied up in whether or not Random Dude responds to me? [more inside]
posted by Ms.Stocking on May 8, 2013 - 31 answers

How weird is it to be willingly, permanently single but not asexual?

I don't want a permanent romantic relationship. My primary relationships are all platonic, and I like it that way. I've done the madly-in-love/lust thing, I've even been married. I just don't really want to do those things ever again. Am I okay? (details inside) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 16, 2013 - 42 answers

Dirty Thirty... yeah right.

I've been single forever. I'm dipping my toe back into dating. I worry that people, particularly nice people whom I'd like to date, are going to think I'm weird for having been single so long. IS it even weird? [more inside]
posted by sockandawe on Apr 8, 2013 - 24 answers

Dealing with pangs of loneliness

I really miss the affection, romantic interest and even just the regular physical touch of another human being. I'm going through several life transitions and can't really start a relationship until at least the fall, but how do I tide over the desperate feelings of loneliness until then? I don't want casual sex or a pet. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2013 - 17 answers

Men are just intimidated by you? Come on really?

Give me your tough love criticism of why I'm single! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 2, 2013 - 56 answers

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