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10 posts tagged with shyness and socialanxiety. (View popular tags)
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Judge Dread

I know intellectually that I shouldn't worry so much about people judging me, yet my mind still goes there. Any advice/tips? [more inside]
posted by Team of Scientists on Jul 31, 2012 - 9 answers

How can a former shy person go from merely functional to friendly?

I used to be very shy. Through years of pushing myself (I'm 33 now), I've become pretty amazingly functional. But I find myself in an unexpected spot. While I very much want to be around people and I can now handle it without freezing up, my experience of actually being around people is one of gritted teeth and willpower. There's very little joy in it. In theory, I'd like nothing more than a bushel of friends hanging out in my kitchen on a Sunday night. In practice, I push myself into social situations like dunking my arm in freezing water, pulling it out with a huge sigh of relief as soon as I let myself. That's not a recipe for forging new friendships, which I know take time and certain amount of vulnerability. What can I do to take myself to the next level -- from functional to genuinely friendly? Do people ever make it to the next level? On the phobia scale, it's not enough for me to be able to let a spider crawl on my arm without having a panic attack, I need to be able to lay down in a cave full of spiders and love it. (I've been in therapy for a year, but aside from that, I'd like to hear from you all.)
posted by anonymous on Jun 7, 2012 - 21 answers

How do I tell people I have social anxiety?

I've suffered from severe social anxiety for around 7 years. It's not as paralyzing as it once was but I still find it very difficult to talk to people. I never know what to say in social situations so I keep pretty quiet which seems to make people really uncomfortable. I've been told I across as aloof and self involved. I feel like I should let people know why I'm so quiet but I feel weird telling people that I have social anxiety. Is there a way I can communicate that I have a hard time talking to people without coming across as a weirdo.
posted by Chenko on Sep 12, 2011 - 18 answers

How do I stop being a regular truant out of extreme shyness?

I have this terrible habit of skipping school out of social anxiety or shyness, even for the smallest reasons like not bringing an important book, arriving late or not knowing where the class is. How do I stop this and be a regular? [more inside]
posted by Senza Volto on Aug 22, 2010 - 36 answers

Suggestions for shy/anxious lurkers at meetups?

Where can I find, order and purchase, by this evening, a T-shirt that says "Lurker" in big white letters? (Or would that be a bad idea?) Alternatively: please help me find ways to minimize or avoid social anxiety awkwardness at the PDX meetup. [more inside]
posted by Two unicycles and some duct tape on Jul 18, 2009 - 28 answers

How did you find love or companionship in spite of anxiety?

What steps did you take to find your partner in spite of social anxiety or severe shyness? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 2, 2009 - 33 answers

Extroverts, please speak up!

This one is for the extroverts. As someone who has struggled with social anxiety/shyness to varying degrees my entire life, I'm very curious to know what your inner dialogue is like? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 19, 2008 - 32 answers

You scare me and I don't want to talk to you.

Is there a way to tell clients I want them to communicate with me through email instead of the phone that doesn't make me sound weird? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 31, 2007 - 39 answers

How can a late-bloomer sow oats without getting stuck?

Late-bloomer-filter: I was a painfully shy, geeky, withdrawn guy with almost no friends and no social life. Over the past few years (I'm 28 now), I went to therapy, got a new job, moved from my sleepy suburban town to New York, got tons of people-practice, made new friends... and then this year, it all suddenly and magically clicked. It's unreal, but instead of nights alone with my laptop, I'm out almost constantly with tons of friends, hanging out, going on dates, drinking, dancing, and generally having more fun than I ever believed was possible for me. But I need your advice before I create a monster. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 2, 2006 - 22 answers

Have a Nice Day!

I'd like to be nicer to people. I'm generally anxious, socially awkward, and don't enunciate very well. I have trouble with spontaneous conversation and small talk, and get flustered by clumsy social encounters. As a result I've developed a reputation as aloof and unapproachable. What can I do to be a more pleasant person?
posted by anonymous on Dec 19, 2004 - 48 answers

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