I would like to be more, er, assertive in bed, but I'm too shy. How can I get past this? Is there a good self-help book on the subject? Is there anything you've personally tried that worked for you? [more inside]
posted on Jul 16, 2008 - 19 answers

I am a 38-year-old man who has many good qualities (I hope so at least) but two drawbacks which understandably be dealbreakers for most women - I am impotent and I have a small penis (around 4 inches on the rare occasions it is erect), so even if my impotence got treated I am not sure I could satisfy a women. On the other hand, I have heard that it's possible to have satisfactory sex life with a 3 inch penis, but have no idea how that can be. So basically I am what would be a figure of ridicule for many other men, and not exactly a strong candidate to be a boyfriend for most women either. However I know some women while still heterosexual may not want a sexual partner e.g. they may be celibate for whatever reason. And there may even be women who will overlook a sex life without penetrative sex for the right person. I have just come out of a four-year relationship which had lots of affection and companionship but not strong feelings of passion and obviously no sex, but I eventually want another relationship again and believe I have a lot of love to give the right person. How can I find her? [more inside]
posted on Mar 23, 2008 - 38 answers

Do people with under-developed social skills know that their skills need work? If so, how? [more inside]
posted on Jan 14, 2008 - 23 answers

Help me overcome and introverted nature. [more inside]
posted on Nov 22, 2007 - 20 answers

I use drinking to manage social anxiety. Suggestions? [more inside]
posted on Aug 13, 2007 - 24 answers

I'm painfully shy. My mind often goes blank during social interactions. It's almost like I kind of lose myself. I'd like to find a way to fight this. [more inside]
posted on Jun 14, 2007 - 18 answers

Therapy or bootstraps? I have no friends beyond immediate family and online acquaintances. I can't clean house or do my home-based job because I get distracted -- by surfing the Net, even though it gets boring and I get less and less pleasure from it, by eating, by walking around the house, or by doing anything but the productive work I know I need to do to be happy. I have a very difficult time even reading a complete book, and I have always been an avid reader. And I have almost completely starved the creative part of myself. I have almost nothing to show for my life over the past twenty years. [more inside]
posted on Apr 2, 2007 - 19 answers

Eye contact, smiling and how to be more approachable? [more inside]
posted on Apr 1, 2007 - 15 answers

I'm a great public speaker, but painfully shy in every other situation. What to do? [more inside]
posted on Mar 10, 2007 - 38 answers

I am shy and sometimes socially anxious person who has benefitted greatly from social activities run by a small support group where I live (Glasgow, Scotland). I found that site just by sheer good fortune after learning (a couple of years ago) to type the phrase "social anxiety" into Google. I would like to meet more people and have more of a social life and so have started a local Shyness group on Meetup.com. I would like my group and my site to appeal to those who see themselves as shy rather than socially anxious and to those who know they are shy but have never heard of social anxiety. Where would be good places online and offline to promote our group? Where are the local shy people to be found?
posted on Feb 13, 2007 - 9 answers

Is there a way to tell clients I want them to communicate with me through email instead of the phone that doesn't make me sound weird? [more inside]
posted on Jan 31, 2007 - 39 answers

Late-bloomer-filter: I was a painfully shy, geeky, withdrawn guy with almost no friends and no social life. Over the past few years (I'm 28 now), I went to therapy, got a new job, moved from my sleepy suburban town to New York, got tons of people-practice, made new friends... and then this year, it all suddenly and magically clicked. It's unreal, but instead of nights alone with my laptop, I'm out almost constantly with tons of friends, hanging out, going on dates, drinking, dancing, and generally having more fun than I ever believed was possible for me. But I need your advice before I create a monster. [more inside]
posted on Dec 2, 2006 - 22 answers

How can I stop being passive? [more inside]
posted on Nov 10, 2006 - 19 answers

How do I overcome camera shyness as a foreign photographer? Much [more inside]
posted on Aug 13, 2006 - 15 answers

I'd like to help my buddy find a girlfriend. He's 26 and pretty normal, other than the fact that he's never had a girlfriend or even been on a date and he's obviously extremely shy around females. How can I help him? [more inside]
posted on Aug 2, 2006 - 35 answers

Looking for a brainstorm about tips for a shy, semi-square kind of guy to make friends with locals in a cool neighbourhood. [more inside]
posted on Jul 10, 2006 - 13 answers

How can an awkward guy make friends? [more inside]
posted on Jun 9, 2006 - 26 answers

What is the evolutionary advantage of shyness, particularly in early girls' adolescence? [more inside]
posted on Oct 23, 2005 - 32 answers

How do you start your college career over, about halfway through? [more inside]
posted on Sep 24, 2005 - 22 answers

I'd like to be nicer to people. I'm generally anxious, socially awkward, and don't enunciate very well. I have trouble with spontaneous conversation and small talk, and get flustered by clumsy social encounters. As a result I've developed a reputation as aloof and unapproachable. What can I do to be a more pleasant person?
posted on Dec 19, 2004 - 48 answers

How can you overcome pee shyness in public urnials? As in, stepping to the plate, but being unable to pee until the bathroom is empty?
posted on Oct 29, 2004 - 28 answers

How do you overcome extreme shyness?
posted on Oct 15, 2004 - 38 answers

Psychology/Sociology Q [I think?] Does anyone else experience participatory inhibition when immersed in a like minded group? For example, a creative person becoming unusually shy/quiet within a team of creative people working on a [design] task? Lurkers on MeFi or other online communities might be another example. Or, the opposite: a creative person's creativity amplified [uninhibited?] in the presence of less creative people?

Is it a matter of personality/psychology? Is it confidence/self assuredness? Is it alterable? Imaginary?!

Sources for further reading and help clarifying the question appreciated.
posted on Apr 30, 2004 - 6 answers

I'm new to Minneapolis, fresh out of college, working at a job where my co-workers are much older than me, and I'm feeling a bit stumped over how to go about finding some new friends. I enjoy rock shows, bike riding, indie movies etc., but I feel shy going out all by myself. What are some good ways to find a niche and some good pals in a new town?
posted on Apr 7, 2004 - 15 answers