Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with shoplifting

Ignore all the lawyers?

Anonymous — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 11:15:43 -0800

What are the repercussions of ignoring a civil demand letter? Has anyone ever had their credit ruined? Long story short, got caught shoplifting at a Safeway in SF. I will probably getting a civil demand letter in the mail soon. I am willing to settle with them for $50, which is roughly equal to twice the value of what I attempted to steal. But I am wondering, has anyone ever been taken to court and/or had their credit ruined by not responding to a civil demand?

How to avoid police charges?

Anonymous — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 10:53:07 -0800

After being apprehended but before being charged by the police, how do you maximize your chances of being let off with a warning? I was apprehended recently for theft under $5,000 in Ontario, involving items worth a bit over $200. The police were tied up so I was released from the store. The police called later on and I'll be meeting with them in a few days.

I'm 19 (so an adult now) with no priors and very cooperative. I spoke to duty counsel and then a lawyer afterward, and they said that if charged, I would likely be eligible for diversion. I don't mind completing diversion, since I realize I need to take responsibility for my actions; however, any sort of criminal record would be devastating for a number of reasons. Now, the loss prevention officer told me that for people like me, the police often just give a verbal warning. The loss prevention officer even went so far as to change the wording on my notice of apprehension, crossing out the "will" in "A Criminal Summons will be obtained by the Police on that charge after your release" to "may." On the other hand, I've heard that for cases involving hundreds of dollars, officers always charge. I'm still holding out hope that if I behave in all the right ways, the officer might let me off without charges (and thus no record).

My main concern is of how to talk to the police officer. I want to express remorse for my actions and demonstrate that it won't happen again. But would it be a bad idea to admit guilt in case the police decide to charge? I should add that the loss prevention officers saw me conceal some merchandise and attempt to leave the store with it, so I don't know if I have much of a chance at pleading not guilty. I'm just worried that telling the police officer too much could really hurt my options should he decide to charge me.

What do you think is the best way to go about this? Is the dollar value of the items too high to hope for a warning? If there is a possibility of leniency, then how can I maximize this possibility in my interactions with the officer? YANAL, etc. but any advice would be greatly appreciated. Throwaway e-mail at anon0602@gmail.com.

So now, my kid is a shoplifter. Grumpy neighbor relations ensue.

Anonymous — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 08:15:32 -0800

My kid spent the night with his friend. The next day, thinking he's still at the friend's house, I get a phone call from the local grocery store. Seems my kid was shoplifting. Now, both of the mom's involved are angry with each other. I'm posting this anonymously, because I don't want my son to find this. The details are kind of ugly. Throwaway email at shopliftersmom@gmail.com. Apologies for the length.

The boys are 12 and 13. Mine is the younger one.

My son spent the night with his best friend. I'm friends and neighbors with the parents. The boys have had sleepover pretty often, both here and there. The last time their boy was over, we caught him smoking in the bathroom after we'd hidden every possible bit of tobacco and alcohol in the house. He's been known to steal cigarettes from his own parents and has been, in general, a troubled kid.

Saturday afternoon, I thought my boy was still at the friend's place, playing video games or whatever, when I get the call from the local grocery store. My son had been caught shoplifting.

I went and picked him up. The people there were more than reasonable. Actually, they were very, very kind. They'd even considered just letting him go, but I was glad they didn't. I figure if you're going to get in trouble, you might as well learn a lesson from it. He and his friend had walked there and my son said he was thirsty, but had no money, so he took a soda. We've been shopping at this place for years. They know me, my kids, and the other family involved. The store also has the best water fountain in town, just for the record.

He says his friend had no idea of what he'd done, which I find hard to believe. He'd asked them to let his friend go home, and they did.

Here's the tricky part. My kid is a straight A student with no history of bad behavior. His friend, on the other hand, has recently been allowed back to regular school, so there's a lot at stake for him if he gets caught misbehaving.

I tried to call the other parents before I left to get my son and they weren't home. The oldest daughter had been left with the phone and responsibility for the kids in their house. The boys left before the other parents did. The other parents also weren't home when I got back and went to collect my son's things. They didn't even know about the incident until Sunday. No, I didn't call. I was pretty angry and didn't want to be venting at the wrong target. On Sunday, the other mom called and left a message, which I tried to return, but got voice mail. Then, she showed up at my door and came on in, like usual. She seemed surprised that I was aggravated with her at all and stomped off mad at me. I mean, we usual have coffee or drinks together regularly, and I can't be grumpy about this?

Here's my beef. They left not knowing where the boys were. What they do know is that their son gets in trouble pretty often. No one called me to say they were leaving because they left their teenage daughter home and in charge. When they did find out what happened 24 hours later, there was nothing even remotely like a "sorry I lost track of your kid when he was in my care." And, their kid has a history of this kind of crap and mine doesn't. The boys' stories also don't entirely match up, and the other boy took an attitude with me when I picked up my son's things.

I know kids make stupid mistakes, and believe me, we are having repercussions. He's grounded. He's written letters of apology to the two folks whose day he made worse at the store. I sure don't see anymore sleepovers for a while at anyone's house.

We've all known about various dysfunctions with the other household. The mom I'm talking about has often come over to vent, and my kids have been considered positive influences to their kids. My kids know they are loved, but I'm generally one of those moms who doesn't take any crap.

I know this is long, but I guess my biggest questions are:

1. How I should feel about this and deal with it appropriately.
2. How I should feel about the other mom, who has been a long-time friend of the family, getting angry with me for feeling angry with her? She seemed super-offended that I was put out with her at all. If the situations had been reversed, I think I would have gotten a lot more grief.
3. This family friendship has been pretty one-sided for a long time. Is it time to just write it off as too much trouble?

In cognito ex-shoplifter in Costco ok?

penguingrl — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 22:12:14 -0800

What is Costco's statutes of limitation for shoplifting? Do they really keep track of previous shoplifters? (Asking for a friend)

He was caught for shoplifting, charged with a misdemeanor, had his picture taken via Polaroid and had his membership revoked. The items came to a total of $500. He was told that he was no longer welcomed @ the store, but was not given a time limit and does not, due to the state of shock (he was 20 at the time), remember if they said he was banned for life.

He does not plan on applying for a membership in order to avoid being flagged, but his wife would like to apply for one under her name. His wife will be purchasing everything off her card, so it is just a concern for his presence, he would like to avoid getting charged with trespassing. My question is: will it be ok for him to at least show up at the store and shop with his wife and family? (Note: the Costco he will be going to will NOT be the same store he was charged at. And the shoplifting incident was a year ago.)

Mortified and terrified: I got stopped for shoplifting. What to do?

Anonymous — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 05:18:21 -0800

Stopped and fined for shoplifting for the first time. What to do with the confusing letter I received, the non-responding phone #, and the fine. Last week, I was stopped at a large grocery store chain for shoplifting a bottle of shampoo. Yes, things are that bad for me financially. I had never been stopped before. This is all new to me. The security guy stopped me quietly, took a report, and let me go. He said that I might be charged something by (the store), or I might not get charged, and that the issue would stay between me and the store. Today I got a letter that says that I must pay $275 in the next 7 days or I will be taken to court.

The letter says that according to the law, they can charge me up to $500, in addition to actual damages incurred (in this case, about $11 for the shampoo, but they took that back). It says "In this case, the actual damages equal (the cost of damage to)". Yes, that's exactly what it says. It further says if I want to settle without a civil matter, I should send $275 within 7 days. It later says, "Payment or non-payment of the amount demanded will have no effect on the criminal prosecution of any alleged theft by local law enforcement officials". That doesn't make sense to me, even after several readings. It gives a number to call, which I did, and I left a message and got no call back.

I want to find out if this amount is negotiable and if I have any other options. I do NOT want this to show up in any court action. I do not want anyone I know to EVER find out about this. I am mortified. Obviously, $275 is a difficult amount for me if I was caught taking an $11 bottle of shampoo, especially having no prior record whatsoever.

So I'm upset that there is a fine, and I take responsibility for my actions, but the (high) amount will make things even more difficult for more financially, and I fear these guys won't respond to my calls at all.

I know YANML, and please, I'm not looking for moral slapdowns (I feel bad enough as it is), but any advice would be appreciated.

You can contact me directly at onfourfeet@yahoo.com if you want. Thanks.

Was that a coyote shoplifting?

lester — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 11:11:56 -0800

Okay, s I saw this video on the CNN site a few hours ago. The newscasters go on about it being a dog that was shoplifting, but I think it was a coyote. Any mefi out there know more about coyotes care to make a positive id?

What do you do with a 5 year old shoplifter?

baylink — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 14:55:51 -0800

So, what's the current Received Wisdom on what to do when you get home and find that your 5 year old has lifted a couple pieces of candy at the grocery store without benefit of payment? Yeah, I know, take the kid back to the store, and let the manager have *his* theatrical moment in the sun scaring the bejeezus out of the kid, then pay him and move along.

But this is WalMart. Lots of stupid people work at WalMart.

Lots of cops are stupid enough to actually arrest a 5 year old these days.

So we're pretty sure we're going to pass on that one. Any other ideas?

[ Interesting that we don't have parenting as a category... ]

That's just wrong!

sixcolors — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 18:45:54 -0800

How common is it for young people to conceal (weapons and drugs) and steal? I know stealing and concealing drugs/weapons are kind of different subjects, but what they both have in common...if they get caught other people (innocent) can get in trouble too. Guilty by association.

Within the last month, I found out some crazy things about a few of the people I hang out with.

-I gave a couple a friends a ride down to the bar. Little did I know that the person sitting behind me was drinking from a flask. It is illegal in my area to drink alcoholic beverages in a moving car. Fortunately another friend "told" on her.
-There are rumors that some more people sneaked in flasks at an overnight service project.
-One of my friends discovered that some people sneaked pot in his car.
-A couple people, mostly the guys, carry knives and sometimes guns to everyday places, such as malls and parks.
-Two people admitted to shoplifting.
-One friend caught another friend stealing at her house.

Now, not all of these people are close friends, thank God, but I do hang out with them on semi-regular basis. And I have been hanging out with them for a while. I was just unaware of their "deviant activities" until recently.

Am I just associating with a rough crowd? Or, am I naive and it is quite common for young people (20-28) to do those sort of things?

Young White Rapper vs. The Municipal Courts of the Midwest

thebellafonte — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 12:42:38 -0800

Is my white rapper little brother being discriminated against in municipal court? My little brother was recently caught shoplifting two PSP games from Wal-Mart. This was his first offense, not to mention his first run-in with the law. They arrested him at the store and then released him that night. I did a lot of research on Missouri law and spoke to a lawyer as to what could happen. Between people I spoke to and things I read, I found many discrepencies, such as no guideline determining arrest (some said it was based on the dollar amount stolen, while others said it was based on if the officer thought it was necessary.) Everyone assured me that because it was his first offense and because he was very cooperative, he would not have to serve jail time, and would probably just have to pay a fine and court costs.
However, at municipal court, they told him he had to get a lawyer and then come back for a trial, which went against everything I'd heard and read. I'd thought that one only had a trial if they plead "non-guilty" which he did not.
I do not wish to take the focus off the fact that he did commit a crime, but I have concerns that my brother is being discriminated against. Again, he was extremely cooperative and remorseful. But he is a young, white rapper (and dresses accordingly) in the Midwest. Seems like a recipe for bias.
Can anyone make me feel better about where this is going or should I prepare myself for the worst, ugliest side of the law?

Dealing with store security

chef_boyardee — Sat, 01 Jul 2006 17:48:00 -0800

On the coattails of the thread Ridiculousness at the Grocery Store, what's the smart way to handle being approached by store security in the United States? Assuming that you absolutely did not intentionally shoplift, and either (A) you have no goods at all or (B) you have some trivial item you forgot to pay for? Also please cite the state if you're talking about specific laws where you're at.

Ridiculousness at the grocery store

jessica — Sat, 01 Jul 2006 14:25:13 -0800

This afternoon my boyfriend went to our local Publix supermarket to pick up lunch. He ordered a sub, picked up two bags of chips, and started eating one bag as he walked around finishing up his shopping. When he reached the checkout line he dumped everything on the belt and started reading a magazine as he waited in line to pay the cashier. He paid and then walked out the door with his bags where he was then stopped and told to come back inside. The guy who stopped him accused him of not paying for the bag of chips that he ate. My boyfriend apologized, said it was a mistake, that he wasn't paying attention and pulled out a dollar to cover the cost of the bag of chips. The guy said he wasn't going to let him get away with it and that he needed to come with him. They brought him to a back room where they repeatedly threatened to call the cops and made a huge deal over this .75 cent bag of chips. He was told he needed to sign some paperwork and they would let him go.

He read over the contract which basically said that he deliberately and intentionally stole the bag of chips and that Publix would be contacting him within the next three weeks to give him a fine. He asked if he could amend the contract and they refused, saying he had to sign it as is and they would then let him go. He reluctantly signed, they gave him a number to call if he didn't hear from Publix and sent him on his way.

So, yes, he is an idiot (trust me, I've told him so). He should never have signed. He should have let them call the cops and then told his side of the story. He should have changed the contract that they gave him to sign. Basically, there are a million things he should have done that he didn't do. I've already called the store, gotten the name of the general manager, spoken to the manager on duty and took the name, company and number of the loss prevention officer that initially stopped him. I asked the manager to fax me a copy of the contract that was signed and he refused, stating that it was the property of Publix. I called the police and requested an officer accompany my boyfriend back to the store when he asks for copies of the paperwork.

It was a genuine accident and my boyfriend was apologetic and offered to pay on the spot. What else can he do? Can he demand a copy of the surveillance tape? Do we really need to get a lawyer? How much weight does this document he signed hold? Can he claim it was signed under duress? The last thing we need is Publix issuing him some ridiculous $500 fine or pushing ahead with other civil or criminal charges.

How much physical abuse can "Wal-Mart Cops" legally dish during a detainment for suspected shoplifting?

Anonymous — Fri, 09 Jun 2006 17:53:56 -0800

How much physical abuse can "Wal-Mart Cops" legally dish during a detainment for suspected shoplifting? Can cops seize a car for being used in a crime when no charges are ever filed? My wife was shopping at a Wal-Mart supercenter. During her check-out, she had a pan that did not have a price. The cashier called a CSM over to look into the pan. She continued scanning items. She was also purchasing two spindles of blank DVDs. The cashier scanned the items and then said "These barcodes are not right." She removed a sticker and there was another barcode. She deleted the two wrong scans, and scanned one and the price came up. She asked my wife if that was OK, and she said yes, that was fine. She scanned the other set and continued. The CSM left with the pan for several minutes while they continued scanning the other items. The CSM returned, did not have a price for the pan, but told the cashier that the first stickered price on the blank DVDs was the correct price. My wife asked if that was correct, and the CSM said yes. The CSM had the cashier delete the more expensive priced line items and rescan the stickers that were on the DVDs. The transaction finished and my wife went to leave.

At the exit, she was stopped by a Loss Prevention employee on her way out of the store. The employee told her "I think you know what this is for," to which she responded that she did not. He forced her to accompany him to a room inside the store. She asked him if he was a police officer, and he said he was not. He proceeded to detain her while calling the police. When she asked why he was holding her, he replied that had the right to keep her, and asked her "Haven't you ever heard of a citizen's arrest?"

During the course of her detention by Wal-Mart, the employee told her to show him her identification. She was standing at the push side of her shopping cart and the employee was at the front end of the cart. She reached for her purse to get her ID, and the employee grabbed her by the arm and threw her to the ground. He pinned her down with his knee in her back, and proceed to hold her in this position for several minutes while yelling at her. She tried to explain that he told her to show him her ID and that's what she was doing. He handcuffed her, pulled her up, and then began to yell at her some more. The line of yelling consisted of things such as "You can take this to court and contest it, but you will lose, because I am the best loss prevention person in the Midwest" (she had not suggested anything of the sort, he was pre-emptive) and "You're just a thief." He was close enough that his spit was hitting her in the face while she was being yelled at. The tackle caused her to suffer a laceration on her knee, a deep muscle bruise on her arm, and discomfort in her shoulder.

Later, when law enforcement arrived, she tried to tell the officer what happened and how she was assaulted by the Wal-Mart employee. The officer told her "Be glad it was him. I would have tased you." He refused to listen to her protests about her detainment and what was going on. When the officer went to take her out, she asked what was happening. The officer responded "You don't get to ask any questions." She was taken into his cruiser. They proceeded to drive through the parking lot while the officer pressed buttons on the keyless entry for my car (her name is not on the registration, and I was not with her) car until he found it. He then told her that she was going to have our car seized under forfeiture laws. The car was towed and she was taken to the jail intake (Large city, 500,000-1 million people).

After being held for 14 hours, she was released without any charges being filed and no citations issued. During her time, no one told her she was under arrest. No one told her what crime she was being accused of. No one told her of her rights. No one told her what was going to happen to her. No one told her anything. She was denied access to an attorney during this time.

So, here is why this is posted here. I know from previous threads and other readings that there is a certain amount of leeway offered under storekeeper rights for detaining someone suspected of shoplifting. However, this seems excessive. Did Wal-Mart's employee commit assault, false imprisonment, and other assorted crimes? Should we investigate suing Wal-Mart for the actions of their employee? Should we see action against the law enforcement agency for denying access to an attorney during processing?

Bonus question: Following up with the lieutenant who is the whole of the forfeiture unit, he told me that even though no charges were filed, they could still proceed with the civil forfeiture since the vehicle was used in a crime (She was not in the car at the time, and since no charges were filed, was there a crime?). However, since her name was not on the title, they said they would release it to me. I have to sign a "promissory note" (his words) saying that if I let her use the vehicle and it is used in a crime by her, I lose any standing for vehicle release. Does anyone else see anything wrong with that?

Obligatory throw-away account: walmart.abuse@gmail.com - Contact with any questions. I won't be posting here with my account, but, will respond to e-mails (and ask that you repost them if you see fit).

shoplifting: improbable cause

weapons-grade pandemonium — Wed, 24 Aug 2005 09:06:25 -0800

Inept dick filter: My supermarket thinks I'm a shoplifter. About a month ago I was stopped outside a large Canadian supermarket by a woman who asked me to show her my receipt for socks that I had purchased with my groceries. After a somewhat embarrassing discussion at the front entrance of the store (since many customers were passing by) I showed her the receipt. I talked with the manager afterwards, and filled out a short complaint form with my name and phone number. It appears she stopped me because I bring my own bags, a policy the store encourages, since they charge for their bags, but I do it for environmental reasons. Here's what bothers me:

1. She did not identify herself until well into the conversation, when I questioned her.
2. She saw me put the socks in the bag, but she was not at the checkout when I passed my purchases through the register—the socks were clearly in sight, along with the empty bags that I passed by the cashier. No probable cause.
3. I heard nothing back from the manager, yet I am an excellent customer, and buy all their high-end organic products.

A month later, and I’m still annoyed. Suggestions please.