1980 posts tagged with sex.
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STD/AIDS PSA from early 90s

A public service announcement from the very early 90s intended to spread STD awareness by describing how, when you sleep with someone, you are having sex with every person with whom your partner has had sex. Can you help me find video, audio or print collateral from this PSA? [more inside]
posted by everyfoolthing on Feb 27, 2016 - 7 answers

How to get past my husband's lack of attraction

My husband and I have been together for 16 years, married for 10. We started dating at almost 20. We generally have a good marriage, good communication, and love each other. However, several times over the past few years, my husband has told me that he is not attracted to my body. He still thinks my face is pretty and we still have sex about once a week, 2x a month if we're busy, and it's good. I'm having trouble getting past the fact that he feels this way, though. I'm angry and resentful. How do I move past this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 20, 2016 - 24 answers

How to stop dating after a couple dates?

I'm 32, date women and men, and am just getting back into dating. After two-three dates, what's the polite way to let someone know that you're not interested in dating further (because of lack of chemistry or whatever)? Does it change based on how naked you got with them? These are mostly internet dates where we text a little, don't talk on the phone, and don't see one another outside dating.
posted by anonymous on Feb 16, 2016 - 27 answers

How can I transport Cialis pills for emergency use?

How can I transport Cialis/Viagra pills for emergency use? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 15, 2016 - 13 answers

Which gangster invented supermarket sex?

This cover of the Police Gazette magazine references "supermarket sex" (?) being invented by a particular "gangster". Who were they referring to? [more inside]
posted by dilaudid on Feb 6, 2016 - 7 answers

The big, scary world of sexytimes

I'm 26 and gay. In a wheelchair. Never been kissed ( ha! ), been on only one date, which went poorly. How do I make inroads with regards to my crippling fear of intimacy- physical and emotional? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 4, 2016 - 9 answers

Seeking romantic compatibility anecdata

Deep in limerence, but the first attempt at sex was disappointing. [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Jan 31, 2016 - 21 answers

Shaving every day as the price of admission for sex

Had a tiff last night with my boyfriend regarding leg stubble. When I tried to get frisky he told me I needed to go shave first since it had been three days. This has come up before and I'm feeling a bit hurt and resentful. He insisted he was joking and didn't care if I'd shaved. Do I need to just let it go? [more inside]
posted by Chkalovskaya on Jan 30, 2016 - 156 answers

Can you find the DIY couch instructions with the funny setup?

Several years ago I found some instructions for building your own (banquette style, I think) seating out of plywood, foam, etc. What sticks out in my memory was the author introducing the need for new furniture. It was something like this: 'I loaned my apartment to some filmmakers for a shoot. After the fact, I discovered they made porn, and you can guess what they used my couch for. (They had sex on it.) Obviously I need new furniture.' Can you track down this page?
posted by Monochrome on Jan 29, 2016 - 2 answers

I am EXTREMELY attracted to my professors/TAs. Help?

I've been in school (grad school!!) for two years, and I want to sex every single one of my male professors/TAs, with very few exceptions. How can I turn this infernal brain thing off?!?! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 27, 2016 - 20 answers

Options for safely reducing female libido?

What are the options (besides antidepressants) a woman has to safely reduce her libido? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 14, 2016 - 13 answers

Where to find how social media has influenced attitudes on sex work?

Has there been any scholarly work or research done on how attitudes toward sex workers/pornographic performers have changed due to social media? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 11, 2016 - 2 answers

Positive representations & stories about sex with men of size

I find myself very attracted to an obese man. I'm an average-sized lady who has mostly been with more slender men, and I want more information about what it would be like to be with somebody much bigger. I'm hoping you can help me find some healthy, positive representations of sexuality featuring men of size. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 22, 2015 - 7 answers

Erotic Bondage

I have a few questions about a form of erotic bondage. Clearly NSFW after the fold. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2015 - 2 answers

Scorpion Sex Scene

I'm trying to remember the title of a movie or tv show from my childhood. This would be an 80's or early 90's thing probably. All I remember is a that its a sex/seduction scene, and that there is a black scorpion scrawling on the silk sheets next to the couple, and then on one or both of them. I want to say that one of them was trying to kill the other and released it before getting it on.
posted by Gargantuantoe on Dec 20, 2015 - 2 answers

Talking about sex with a partner who has Stage 4 cancer...

I really need some advice on how to talk with my partner and address her questions about our sex life (or lack of it) as not only do we have a two-year old but my partner is also undergoing treatment for cancer. Help, please... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2015 - 22 answers

NYC group sex and BDSM scenes

Hi. We're a late 30s F/M couple (both straight) interested in learning more about both the group sex and BDSM scenes in New York City. Groups, websites, articles, tips for newcomers and any other advice or suggestions are all welcome. [more inside]
posted by junipacrossthestars on Dec 15, 2015 - 1 answer

The Pinterest of S&M?

As a mostly service top, I'm good to go with technical aspects of bondage, but have trouble planning the "plotline" or trajectory of any given session with my masochist partner. Are there websites/ books/ blogs that have sizeable compendia of ideas for bondage scenarios (games, roleplays, scripts, etc.)? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2015 - 7 answers

Girlfriend's mom says we have to share separate beds. Opinions?

My girlfriend is twenty five and her mother is telling her to sleep in a separate bed from me. She is fairly introverted and sheltered ( I am too to a degree) and her family is pretty religious. I am feeling uncomfortable that my girlfriend's mother is making these decisions for her, and I am unsure how to proceed or how to feel about this relationship. Any and all opinions are welcome. [more inside]
posted by Thanquol180 on Dec 3, 2015 - 48 answers

How can I stop body image issues getting in the way with a new partner?

Please help me to get over my body image issues when it comes to sex with someone new. [more inside]
posted by NatalieWood on Nov 30, 2015 - 15 answers

Please help a sexless relationship.

Everything is going great, until at some point my partner doesn't seem to be interested in me anymore. Physically. Everything is great, there is just no sex. [more inside]
posted by Tiffy119 on Nov 29, 2015 - 30 answers

My partner has ED. How do I make him feel better?

My boyfriend has had problems maintaining an erection and reaching orgasm for the 7 months we've been together. I love him a lot and know that this hurts him, probably far more than he is letting on. This isn't about me - I would just love some advice from people that have either been in my or his situation about things that have helped them to feel like they aren't a failure or less masculine because of it. [more inside]
posted by kyetak on Nov 26, 2015 - 16 answers

Issues with long distance relationship.

I am living in a long distance relationship and have encountered an issue I do not know how to cope with. I hope you can help me. [more inside]
posted by Salicornia on Nov 24, 2015 - 13 answers

Surely People Want to Test...

Where are the cross-brand variety packs for finding your favorite lubricant? [more inside]
posted by alice_curiouse on Nov 12, 2015 - 8 answers

Talking with my daughter about sex

My daughter is eleven. When she was a toddler, the advice about talking about sex that I read emphasised answering their questions. Kids are naturally curious! They will have all sorts of questions! Just answer them truthfully and you’ll be fine! Of course that did not happen. My child is apparently not very naturally curious about these things, and suddenly she’s a teenager and I have not talked to her about sex yet. I now know I should have handled this differently, but I can’t do anything about that anymore and could use some help with how to talk about this now. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 11, 2015 - 31 answers

The fire is out, but is it possible to spark a new flame?

I don't feel sexually attracted to my spouse anymore. What now? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 10, 2015 - 27 answers

How to handle longtime opposite sex friendships in a relationship?

what is everyone's take on handling opposite sex friendships when you’re in a relationship, especially as we get older? i'm 32. my best guy friend from college moved in with his girlfriend over a year ago. i have met her several times (which i initiated as i wanted to meet her) and i like her (although i have seen her freak at him and noticed she has some insecurity issues) but since they moved in together he always brings her when i ask if he wants to catch up [more inside]
posted by cultureclash on Nov 7, 2015 - 41 answers

Help us find a sex therapist in the Twin Cities

Wife and I recognize that we need outside help, but aren't sure how to find it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 3, 2015 - 2 answers

Getting body image issues out of my head: Dating while fat

So I am an intelligent, funny, kind, 30-year-old fat woman who generally has a healthy and pragmatic attitude about being fat. I felt constantly shitty about not being thin when I was younger, but whatever the wider world thinks, I know being fat doesn't mean I'm not pretty, or that I'm lazy, or whatever. But the negative self-talk, fueled by cultural narratives and negative experiences, rears it ugly head while dating sometimes. I want to get that voice out of my head. [more inside]
posted by Squalor Victoria on Oct 26, 2015 - 18 answers

Found a black metal ring in a urinal--is this a sex accessory?

OK, so I saw this black metal ring sitting in a urinal at a grocery store. Kind of an odd place for one. I'm curious if this is some sort of sex-related accessory that I'm not familiar with, or if it's just some random chain link that happened to end up in a urinal. It was about an inch in diameter. There's a small break in it. Pics are here.
posted by Slinga on Oct 23, 2015 - 7 answers

Quiet Sex Punishments?

What are some ways my sex partner (male) can punish me (female) that are quiet? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 21, 2015 - 12 answers

Condom after blow job? Will my saliva make it slip off?

As above - if I give a bj to my boyfriend as foreplay and then put a condom on him, will my saliva make it more likely it will slip off? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 17, 2015 - 13 answers

Why am I unwilling to try sex things that would make my boyfriend happy?

My boyfriend and I are in our early twenties. He would like some things out of sex and related things that I do not want to do. Given everything I explain below, I would certainly understand if my boyfriend didn't want to be in a relationship with me anymore. I feel bad for not even wanting to try these things when they would make him happy and when it could mean throwing the relationship away. Why do I feel so unwilling to try these things? [more inside]
posted by SillyEvelina on Sep 21, 2015 - 34 answers

Seeking sexually-charged, body-horror / generally-weird passages.

I'm looking to find short scenes in which puberty, or other moments of sexual awakening, are represented through disturbing, surreal elements with a sexual subtext. I'm sure I've encountered this trope a lot, but my mind is coming up completely blank, either of any example or even what it's called! Can anyone help?
posted by piato on Sep 11, 2015 - 36 answers

Music for the bedroom?

What are some songs I can use to mask the noise of sex so I can be polite to my roommates and allow my girlfriend and me to fully enjoy ourselves? [more inside]
posted by mtphoto on Sep 9, 2015 - 28 answers

Bad Wrists. No Orgasm.

I'm a young woman. Health troubles have led to wrist pain that's rendering many things impossible with my right hand (and I'm right-handed) and possible-but-painful with my left. I'm otherwise able-bodied. As I work through the health concerns personally and professionally, I'm left stumped as to how to have sexual pleasure at this time. More (and throwaway email) inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 7, 2015 - 12 answers

Legitimately dom or mentally unstable?

If it's apparent that a guy's interest in being a dom is linked to emotional issues, is that a red flag? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 31, 2015 - 17 answers

I Don't Like You That Way: Love, Sex and Dating On Four Wheels

What do you do about your fear of intimacy and your lack of potential sutiors when you're a virgin at 25 and universally held to have the sexuality of a potato? [more inside]
posted by marsbar77 on Aug 30, 2015 - 35 answers

Calling all playlists! ISO popular songs w/consent lyrics/theme

I will have some college students in a talk that discusses consent , along with some older folks, and I'm out of touch with recent popular music that has even a whiff of healthy consent and is sex-positive/relationship-positive (MJ's Let's Wait a While also fits the criteria, but has been around for a decade) Oh, and for a bonus the brainstormer said - how about a fitness class with these themed songs that I'm drawing a blank on...flailing thoughts below the fold.... [more inside]
posted by childofTethys on Aug 18, 2015 - 19 answers

Going on a date. He uses a wheelchair. Help me not be an idiot.

I have a date coming up with a man who uses a wheelchair. He is super funny and smart and super hot. I have never dated someone who uses a wheelchair. In fact, I've never even known someone who uses a wheelchair. Help me not screw it up! [more inside]
posted by dinnerdance on Aug 15, 2015 - 29 answers

I Don't Orgasm, and I Don't Care

I'm in my 30's, and I don't orgasm during sex. I still like sex - a lot! - but I find myself compulsively "faking it" in every single relationship, and I'm not sure how to stop or if I should. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 14, 2015 - 34 answers

It Really Has Been That Easy For This Pretty Boy

So, I am married to a very pretty guy. We are both mid 30s. His entire relationship history includes women just throwing themselves at him, so he hasn't had to ever make any effort to learn how to be romantic or initiate foreplay. His current method is to just tell me he wants to have sex. When I complained that his method wasn't enough for me, he asked me what I want him to do. It is like I'm dealing with an adolescent boy. What resources could I steer him towards that don't include a sex therapist?
posted by LilithSilver on Aug 11, 2015 - 22 answers

How do I tell s/o they need to change everything they do in bed, for me?

I'm wrestling between not trying to date this person - who's one of my best friends - and trying to make it work. The problem is the sexuality - either the chemistry is off, or it needs to be adjusted. I just don't know *how* to do that, without hurting his feelings, or if I should at all. [more inside]
posted by meeeese on Aug 10, 2015 - 13 answers

How is babby is formed, 1980s edition

"When a Mummy and a Daddy love each other very much..." is the default amusing quote for pretending to explain the facts of life to children. It is enough of a meme it must come from somewhere. But where? [more inside]
posted by slightlybewildered on Aug 8, 2015 - 15 answers

How do you define a sex addict?

A close friend and confidante of mine has started a new relationship, but she's questioning what's "normal" for sexual appetites. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 5, 2015 - 30 answers

Boyfriend extremely pushy with sex

I have been seeing someone for 4 months. Quite a few times he was very pushy with having sex while I am sick or during period when I made it clear that I don't want to. He never actually crosses the line in forcing me to do it but I still feel weirded out. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 3, 2015 - 84 answers

Navigating the tricky waters of an ever-changing dating status tide.

Dear Mefites, this is my first question! I'm excited to hear from the community i've been reading since forever. Here's an issue I'm facing that's bothering me: someone i'm seeing has a some-what change of heart/mind towards me in terms of how he envisions our future/potential. I've been confused from the beginning as it started sexually quickly, then to possibly serious, to suddenly somewhat possibly just casual now. Grateful if any of you could advise me on what you observe his character/behavior/mindset to be, from the descriptions that I will best try to relate. Please excuse the extremely long post. [more inside]
posted by eustaciavye87 on Aug 3, 2015 - 17 answers

Are rebound relationships (and rebound sex) really often helpful?

Looking at the end of a significant LTR that's probably going to be crushing once I get over the shock. They say that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. I have no experience with this. Is it really often true? (they also say that low-fat deserts and education debt are good for you). [more inside]
posted by wildblueyonder on Jul 19, 2015 - 16 answers

Why might people want more sex in my writing? Why don't I?

I'm no prude. But I don't like writing sex scenes. I've been told on multiple occasions that my writing suffers from a lack of detail when it comes to getting it on. Are you a writer? Did you face a similar issue? How did you resolve it? [more inside]
posted by angrycat on Jul 15, 2015 - 20 answers

How to talk about sexual dissatisfaction

My partner of twelve years is kind of selfish in bed, but also pretty sensitive about talking about it and hasn't taken any initiative after previous discussions. How should I approach this? Am I asking for too much? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 12, 2015 - 33 answers

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