201 posts tagged with sex and dating.
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I forgot how dating works!

Is it typical for a partner to not stay over after having sex for the first time, if it's not a casual sex situation and there's no obvious reason that they need to leave? [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina on Nov 29, 2016 - 33 answers

How to seduce my boyfriend?

Our sex life is dying, and my usual tricks don't work. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 29, 2016 - 39 answers

Reentering the Dating Pool in your late 30s - Guidance needed

After splitting up with my Girlfriend of 8 years over a year and a half ago, I am ready to reenter the dating world. I'm glad that I took time off to work on myself. I instantly wanted to date after breaking up, but it was for all of the wrong reasons. I'm now ready and I need some guidance Details inside [more inside]
posted by kbbbo on Nov 12, 2016 - 9 answers

Creating unspoken boundaries in new/casual relationships?

How do I create subtle boundaries with someone I just started casually dating without pushing them away? I want to give it a chance and see where it goes, but I don't want to get too attached while it is still casual. [more inside]
posted by prism4tic on Oct 19, 2016 - 7 answers

Ever seen red flags that weren't actually red flags?

A dating question about potential red flags. Am I misjudging this person? [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna on Oct 11, 2016 - 45 answers

How to do casual sex?

I'm interested in exploring my sexuality with multiple partners. (37, F, straight-ish). However, I'm a sensitive, over-thinking type with a moderate case of vaginismus. How do i find patient and understanding partners? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 2, 2016 - 11 answers

The 33 Year Old (quasi) Virgin

I started out as Emma. But I've turned into Miss Bates. [more inside]
posted by ChickenBear on Aug 19, 2016 - 22 answers

New guy -am I worrying too much?

I am 37, divorced....Recently, a guy from my hometown (same age) contacted me on Facebook...he lives a 4 hour drive from me. We agreed to meet at the halfway point, and our first date went really well. A few days ago he drove down to see me before heading up to camp with his buddies... He drove 10 hours out of his way for me, and stayed overnight. It was an amazing night, we had been talking regularly for 3 weeks, and ended up sleeping together. Now I am wondering if I'm worrying too much about his texting habits? [more inside]
posted by Maggsie97 on Jul 4, 2016 - 27 answers

How do nonexclusive relationships work?

I'm in the process of getting divorced and am seeing a couple different dudes. I like them both a lot but am in no place for a serious relationship. My soon to be ex is the only serious adult relationship I've ever had so I totally don't know what I'm doing. [more inside]
posted by Janet Snakehole on May 30, 2016 - 12 answers

How to ask out my TA? … when we’ve already made out?

How to ask out my TA? … when we’ve already made out? My judgment may be slightly clouded by, um, hormones. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 10, 2016 - 14 answers

How to stop dating after a couple dates?

I'm 32, date women and men, and am just getting back into dating. After two-three dates, what's the polite way to let someone know that you're not interested in dating further (because of lack of chemistry or whatever)? Does it change based on how naked you got with them? These are mostly internet dates where we text a little, don't talk on the phone, and don't see one another outside dating.
posted by anonymous on Feb 16, 2016 - 27 answers

The big, scary world of sexytimes

I'm 26 and gay. In a wheelchair. Never been kissed ( ha! ), been on only one date, which went poorly. How do I make inroads with regards to my crippling fear of intimacy- physical and emotional? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 4, 2016 - 9 answers

Seeking romantic compatibility anecdata

Deep in limerence, but the first attempt at sex was disappointing. [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Jan 31, 2016 - 21 answers

Girlfriend's mom says we have to share separate beds. Opinions?

My girlfriend is twenty five and her mother is telling her to sleep in a separate bed from me. She is fairly introverted and sheltered ( I am too to a degree) and her family is pretty religious. I am feeling uncomfortable that my girlfriend's mother is making these decisions for her, and I am unsure how to proceed or how to feel about this relationship. Any and all opinions are welcome. [more inside]
posted by Thanquol180 on Dec 3, 2015 - 48 answers

Getting body image issues out of my head: Dating while fat

So I am an intelligent, funny, kind, 30-year-old fat woman who generally has a healthy and pragmatic attitude about being fat. I felt constantly shitty about not being thin when I was younger, but whatever the wider world thinks, I know being fat doesn't mean I'm not pretty, or that I'm lazy, or whatever. But the negative self-talk, fueled by cultural narratives and negative experiences, rears it ugly head while dating sometimes. I want to get that voice out of my head. [more inside]
posted by Squalor Victoria on Oct 26, 2015 - 18 answers

I Don't Like You That Way: Love, Sex and Dating On Four Wheels

What do you do about your fear of intimacy and your lack of potential sutiors when you're a virgin at 25 and universally held to have the sexuality of a potato? [more inside]
posted by marsbar77 on Aug 30, 2015 - 35 answers

Going on a date. He uses a wheelchair. Help me not be an idiot.

I have a date coming up with a man who uses a wheelchair. He is super funny and smart and super hot. I have never dated someone who uses a wheelchair. In fact, I've never even known someone who uses a wheelchair. Help me not screw it up! [more inside]
posted by dinnerdance on Aug 15, 2015 - 29 answers

Navigating the tricky waters of an ever-changing dating status tide.

Dear Mefites, this is my first question! I'm excited to hear from the community i've been reading since forever. Here's an issue I'm facing that's bothering me: someone i'm seeing has a some-what change of heart/mind towards me in terms of how he envisions our future/potential. I've been confused from the beginning as it started sexually quickly, then to possibly serious, to suddenly somewhat possibly just casual now. Grateful if any of you could advise me on what you observe his character/behavior/mindset to be, from the descriptions that I will best try to relate. Please excuse the extremely long post. [more inside]
posted by eustaciavye87 on Aug 3, 2015 - 17 answers

How can I communicate about intimacy issues?

I've been actively dating and having intimate encounters, but it's hard for me to address my sexual limitations and lack of experience with new partners. How to deal? [more inside]
posted by cosmicbeast on Jul 2, 2015 - 13 answers

How to meet guys while gay and trans

I am ftm trans and while I am not on hormones & have not had surgery, I still pass a decent amount of the time. Sometimes I get long, cruising looks from guys who I am sure are gay (on the street, in a mall). I have no idea how to move forward in these situations; porn is my entire frame of reference and I'm sure it's not that simple. How do guys meet guys in public? [more inside]
posted by AFABulous on Jul 2, 2015 - 6 answers

First time woes...

Short version: I had sex for the first time with someone I thought I really liked, but it didn't quite go the way I expected it to and now I'm completely panicking about it. Long version inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 21, 2015 - 12 answers

How do I find out my boyfriend's secret desires?

I'm afraid of boring my boyfriend in bed. He's a decade older and has had quite a few relationships in his past. I can't imagine he's as vanilla as he professes to be--I'm willing to do ANYTHING, and he wants missionary every time. Does he view me as too innocent for anything else? [more inside]
posted by Guinevere on Jun 15, 2015 - 29 answers

My wonderful Mr. Right sucks in bed and I don't know how to tell him

I am in love with my wonderful boyfriend of 3 months. The only problem is that he doesn't seem to care that I am not having ANY orgasms with him, he's not into oral sex (the only thing that has worked for me in the past), he's not into foreplay, he barely kisses me, and he doesn't even realize that I'm unhappy because I am too wimpy and unassertive to voice a word of complaint. He's a very macho "alpha male" old-fashioned chivalrous type and I am afraid to emasculate him by giving him directions in the bedroom or telling him that I'm not satisfied. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 3, 2015 - 55 answers

How do I meet men now?

I'm a straight, overweight but otherwise generally considered attractive, woman in her early 40's. I got out of a LTR a year and a half ago. I am more than ready to date, but having major problems finding anyone interested :( [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2015 - 24 answers

How do I communicate better when I'm about to, erm, get my freak on?

Exactly as it says on the tin. How do, without faking it, I be more upfront about my dating/sexual inexperience with my potential partners, and when? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 10, 2015 - 21 answers

Big difference in age/experience on a first date and if something more.

So I am a 34 male and I knowingly asked a 19-20-21-ish-year-old on a coffee date. I mentioned the age difference to her when I did so. She said, "Sure." If we go on more dates after this date and/or become physically intimate, how can I minimize the chance that she will retrospectively feel preyed upon or taken advantage of in X years? [more inside]
posted by zeek321 on Apr 6, 2015 - 99 answers

Great connection, terrible sex

I asked a friend on a date recently. The date went really, really well, until we tried to have sex. Now I'm not sure if I should try again, or see if I can get out and save the friendship. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 16, 2015 - 25 answers

How do I do casual sex?

I'm trying to loosen up, have fun, and gain more sexual experience; however, I tend to be a bit emotional. By the same token I also tend to feel tied down sometimes in serious relationships and I want to "look around" more before deciding to be in a serious relationship. Looking for ideas on how to balance that. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 10, 2015 - 20 answers

Is this guy interested in dating or just hooking up?

I met this 20-something guy through a mutual friend at a party and we've been texting each other for the past week. He insisted that we should go out drinking sometimes. When I talked to the mutual friend about him, she said that he thinks I'm cute, but she also mentioned that he admitted he had slept with at least 6 girls, of which only 1 was a serious girlfriend. Is there a good odd that he's only into me for sex? How can I tell? I'm at the point in my life where I want a serious relationship, and I'm not sure if I should give this guy a chance. Thanks for your help!
posted by missybitsy on Feb 3, 2015 - 22 answers

Scared of attraction.

29 year old heterosexual male. I believe that I have social anxiety when it comes to talking to women I am attracted to - perhaps more than normal. This has meant very little sex or relationships throughout my life. Practical ideas for dealing with this would be appreciated. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 25, 2015 - 18 answers

Post-coital repulsion

I use sex-related words in my question, so I've placed it in the extended area in case anyone is browsing at a prudish workplace. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 17 answers

Do sex drives ever INCREASE after 3+ years in a relationship?

My SO and I have been growing together more and more in the last three years. However, one thing seems to grow less and less, and as we move closer to thinking about marriage, I am a little concerned that our sex drives are mismatched for a very long term relationship. I am 23 and she is 21. I've heard a ton of anecdotes about women "waking up" sexually around 25. Is it realistic for me to think that that could be a possibility? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2014 - 33 answers

One night stand confusion

Does this have potential to turn into a relationship? [more inside]
posted by akita on Nov 13, 2014 - 24 answers

It's been a year and he still won't sleep with me.

I am a female and my boyfriend and I have been seeing each other about once a week for over a year. I am 27 and he is 30. I know he isn't seeing anybody else, and that he likes me. Why have we still not slept together? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 2, 2014 - 50 answers

Is he a narcissist, or just very self-centred?

I've been dating a guy (30) for half a year, and though I am blinded by love, I'm starting to see signs that he could be narcissistic, but am not sure. [more inside]
posted by palomago on Aug 18, 2014 - 45 answers

How to break it off with someone you've seen, uh, once

Let's say you go on a date with someone. The date goes well, you go back to their place. Things happen...SEX things. You realize afterward that it may have been a mistake. Yeah, definitely a mistake. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 26, 2014 - 14 answers

BDSMfilter: munches, play parties, and social anxiety

How can an shy, inexperienced kinkster approach potential play partners without being too pushy or creepy? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 14, 2014 - 5 answers

International dating- help me stay safe in worst case scenario

I am currently involved in a sexual/dating/subculture where international meetings are normal. Most recently, men have met me in my city and then we have planned a trip later.... And I have had a fab time with these men- they have been great fun! I am okay with meeting men for dinner in Oslo, London or Stockholm..... I have no problem hopping on a plane and meeting a man, spending a few days with him and nipping back home... but I cannot figure out how to make sure that my flight home is paid for- if something doesn't work out. Is there any way to have your flights and hotel paid for, in a way that the host can not just cancel on you if you refuse to have sex with them?
posted by misspony on Jun 4, 2014 - 27 answers

How to start an (awkward) conversation about my IUD

I had an IUD (Mirena) inserted about a month ago. I recently met someone new (yay!), he's great (yay!), and it seems that sexytimes are soon to be had (yay!). I think I need to talk with him about my IUD, though, and I don't know how. [more inside]
posted by singlesock on May 20, 2014 - 18 answers

How do I know if I am in love "enough" with my partner?

How do I know if I am in love "enough" with my partner? Snowflakery to follow [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2014 - 26 answers

Books like The Game, except completely different in every way

A male friend of mine has recently learned that he's not as good at dating women as he thought he was, and wants to get better. Where can I point him for sex and relationship advice, addressed to men, but written from a feminist perspective? [more inside]
posted by psycheslamp on Mar 11, 2014 - 7 answers

I love it when you...don't do that.

What is an effective way to speak to a new partner about bettering their ability to perform cunnilingus? [more inside]
posted by anonymoosemoosemoose on Feb 14, 2014 - 19 answers

It's been a long, long time coming...

My relationship is great, with one small problem - no matter what my girlfriend and I try, I'm not having an orgasm. Oversharing details inside... [more inside]
posted by Ed The Sock on Jan 12, 2014 - 30 answers

Should I tell my boyfriend about my ex who is dying?

My boyfriend (lets call him Mike) does not know about my ex boyfriend's existence (Lee). I found out his brother died a couple of months ago, and now he has the same disease and may or may not survive as well. I am quite upset about this, should I tell Mike about him or just keep it to myself? [more inside]
posted by lovisa91 on Oct 29, 2013 - 30 answers

Past abuse and trying pegging, BDSM with the new boyfriend

The new boyfriend would like me to be more switch-y (and peg him, too) and I'd like to be able to provide that to him but past abuse makes me very adverse to causing people pain even if I know they'd enjoy it and also puts me off being the penetrative partner. How do I enjoy being the dominant/penetrative partner? I love it when the BF dominates me and causes me pain (a not-insane amount and he's always very respectful of my boundaries and comfort) so how can I become more comfortable reciprocating pain to him and how can I become comfortable with being the penetrative partner? [more inside]
posted by code_n_cakes on Oct 20, 2013 - 9 answers

Need sex advice: Possible to learn to enjoy dominance/submission?

New to MeFi, so sorry if this is an odd post... I just started dating a guy - let's call him Michael - who has noted several times that he likes to be a little aggressive in the sack (and although we have not yet had sex, this became clear when we made out/fooled around recently... he was pretty man-handly/dominating, did a little dirty talking, etc.). I have next to no experience in even very mild dominance/submission stuff and honestly have never had any interest in it. I can be a good sport and do a little dirty-talking if it's going to make someone's day, but it has always felt too contrived for me to enjoy it for my own sake. And I've never tried anything beyond that. That said, I really like Michael, am very sexually attracted to him, would hate to end things with him prematurely because of an unexplored difference in our sexual styles, and, frankly, couldn't help but feel a little lame/boring/conservative if I put an end to it for that reason. So, my question: as someone who isn't naturally inclined to be interested in dominance/submission, is there a chance I could learn to like it, or is it pretty much something you like or don't? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 14, 2013 - 29 answers

When does a casual hookup turn into dating? When does it not?

I have been seeing this guy since December about once or twice a month, and am possibly on the verge of having feelings. Trying to figure out how to reasonably navigate this. Tell me about your experiences? [more inside]
posted by anonymoosemoosemoose on Aug 13, 2013 - 10 answers

Date or wait?

I'm a man in his mid-twenties. I've never been in a relationship. I've never even taken anyone out on a date. I want to rectify this, but I think my mental health and my living situation prevent me from doing so. Should I even try to date? If not, what should I do? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 10, 2013 - 35 answers

I know they're nice, but they're not for me!

I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone I've known for over two years, and we've been dating for a year-ish. We're both women in our early 20's. I've only dated women up to this point, and been very happy with that. It seems that my brain doesn't want to keep that status quo anymore and is trying to convince me I want to experience being with men. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 6, 2013 - 10 answers

Fear and Loving in NYC

Why am I not successful in love and lust? [more inside]
posted by nob'dy on Jun 5, 2013 - 35 answers

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