Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with self-improvement

How can I control THE VOLUME OF MY VOICE?

Bardolph — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 10:25:47 -0800

Soft talker here. Any methods/courses/books/exercises that might help me develop better voice projection? I naturally have a sedate, low-pitched speaking voice-- think "NPR announcer"-- that sounds nice over a mic, but carries poorly face-to-face. Hearing-impaired people have an especially hard time with me, for instance, and often in group conversations I get talked over because nobody notices I've started speaking. I'm a girl, if that makes a difference.

I'm quite fond of the existing sound of my voice (aren't we all?), but would like to make it more audible-- especially since I do some speaking in front of groups, and it would be nice not to need a microphone to be heard. My questions are:

(1) is it even possible to make behavioral changes that substantially alter the audibility of one's normal speaking voice, or is that mostly determined by internal anatomy? Some people seem to be naturally loud, so I wasn't sure whether this is just a function of the chest cavity/throat I was born with.

and (2) if voice projection can be improved, what methods are out there to improve it?

Caveat: I've fielded all the obvious suggestions from friends and family-- "Breathe from the diaphragm!" "Aim for the back of the room!" "Have confidence!" "Just speak as loudly as you do when you're [screaming/arguing/being tickled]!", etc. Also, I've tried a few singing lessons, but they didn't really help. Any ideas?

Help me become smarter and have a more dynamic personality.

Jason and Laszlo — Sat, 10 May 2008 09:39:11 -0800

Help me become smarter and have a more dynamic personality. My desired job requires that I be dynamic, sharp, well-spoken and smart. I consider myself smart, but I don't articulate well. I love to read literature and I love to write; I'm less well-spoken and engaging face to face.

There are a million ideas in my head but when it comes time to say them off the cuff, I'm either slow to the point, stuck trying to find the right words, or insecure that I'll sound stupid.

I've been to college. I can do small talk just fine. Any suggestions?

How am I doing?

raheel — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 16:39:18 -0800

How does one keep track of personal improvements in a variety of aspects ? I am inspired by Franklin's virtue tracking system. I have a set of "virtues" (physical fitness, mindfulness, being productive, …) and a set of attributes that loosely define each virtue (fitness: at least one exercise everyday, 7.25 hours of sleep, …).

However, I am stumped when I try to come up with a system that will track how well I am doing. Filling a dot for each virtue (like Franklin) seems very vague and uninformative, and I can't think of any other way to track a wide variety of attributes.

Any ideas?

Does the study of math sharpen critical thinking skills?

jason's_planet — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 12:07:16 -0800

If a man’s wit be wandering, let him post a question about mathematics and reasoning to MetaFilter. The quote that inspires this question is

“If a man’s wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics.” – Francis Bacon

Is Bacon’s recommendation accurate? Does the study of math sharpen the critical thinking and reasoning skills? I ask because I’m kind of . . . intellectually lazy. I don’t think things through as much as I should. I kind of blurt out opinions based on gut feelings and personal prejudices. I want to get into the habit of thinking and am wondering if there are tools available that will sharpen the mind the way that free weights and kettlebells can sharpen the body. And if math might be one of those tools.

Many thanks in advance.

Why do I have such a horrible sense of direction? What can I do about it?

mattholomew — Mon, 11 Sep 2006 18:06:07 -0800

Why do I have such a horrible sense of direction? What can I do about it? For as long as I can remember I've had a really bad sense of direction. If somebody walks me along a route, I can't remember it even if it's fairly simple. I have no sense of which direction I'm facing in at any given time, unless of course I have familiar landmarks or I can see where the sun is. My friends say that they just instinctively *know* the directions relative to where they are at any given time. When I play FPS games I get hopelessly lost and have to have my wife navigate for me. Otherwise I'm a fairly intelligent, successful person, I work in information systems consulting and can handle all the requirements of the job except trying to get from my cubicle to another one in the same building, or driving to a meeting at some offsite location. It's really humiliating. Why am I like this? Are there other people like this, and what do you do to deal with it? Is there anything I can do to improve my 'directional abilities', if that's what you call it?

Happiness without drugs or gods.

Afroblanco — Wed, 22 Feb 2006 19:26:58 -0800

Are there any sort of useful self-improvement systems that don't rely on a bunch of god stuff or pharmacology? I'm in need of a new direction, and am willing to go anywhere but there.

As an adult non student , how can one develop better oral debating skills which include thinking on the feet skills ?

studentguru — Sat, 18 Feb 2006 16:07:43 -0800

As an adult non student , how can one develop better oral debating skills which include thinking on the feet skills ?
What I am looking for are tips about groups one can join as a non student and as an adult.

Those of you who are good at debating how do you keep up sharpening your skill once leaving school?

Is there a volunteer role or paid part time job that can help me develop my debating skills?

Should I go back to school and join in classroom discussions in subjects such as philosophy and psychology?

Can I just pretend to be a student and sneak into colleges and classrooms and debating clubs on campus and find a group of people to befriend and debate?

I am a member of two toastmaster clubs . They don't really give you a chance to develope debating skills in toastmasters.

I don't have much problems writing and giving persuasive speeches.

I have heard in France people sit around coffee shops and argue about philosophy and politics.

I have been to philosophical discussion groups in San Francisco. But the topics picked are often not ones I usually care about and have something to say.

Right now my debating skill is only limited to writing on paper and learning argument fallacies on paper.

I can argue my position quite well quite often. I can write pretty good toastmaster speeches.

I pay attention to well written arguments in law drama. Hence my favorite tv series are "The Practice" and "Ally McBeal" where a lot of dialog is in court arguing.

May be I should just get myself a girlfriend/wife who can argue well.

Have I missed out on anything?

Help me get more awesome.

Anonymous — Mon, 12 Sep 2005 22:03:32 -0800

What, in your opinion, makes someone a "great guy"? Not just romantically, I mean in any sense. I don't feel like an exceptionally cool or likeable person. Maybe I am and have low self-esteem, whatever. That's not what this is about.

I want to become someone that people say is a "great guy." What kind of qualities would you say makes someone such? How to they act in everyday conversations?

Help me stop being an asshole

Anonymous — Sat, 22 Jan 2005 10:29:36 -0800

I am a really terrible person. I lie to everyone I know, I cheat on people relentlessly, I drink excessively and do things to hurt just about everyone I know. I hate doing these things in retrospect but when it's happening, all I can focus on is how it's benefitting me at the moment.

How do I go from being an asshole who's only concern is his own self interests to being a regular human being who concerns himself with those around him? I'm afraid that if I don't fix this soon, I'm going to lose everyone in my life.