Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with safersex

Can you get an STD from making out with someone?

trevor_case — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 13:28:28 -0800

I've been out of the dating arena for a long time (years), and I'm just now starting to go on dates and stuff. So far nothing has happened, but it's starting to get to the point where it might. If I make out with a girl, could I get an STD? I'm not sure whether it's "very possible," "unlikely, but not impossible," or what. Most of the safer sex info is kind of vague, which I find even more alarming.

creative + sexy + fun name +... HIV Prevention?

potatopeople — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 05:38:48 -0800

Please (re?)name my texting/facebook/email-based, safer sex outreach program aimed at men who love men! My non-profit health agency that serves the LGBTQIA and HIV/AIDS communities recently launched a new HIV prevention program, and it needs a new name.

The program involves volunteers sending our short, safer sex themed messages to their peers once a monthv, via text, email, facebook, twitter etc. The messages are especially intended to go to men who love men (gay/bi/trans/queer/DL or downlow/non-labeling guys) in the community, because HIV infections are on the rise here among this group. Volunteers need not be gay/bi men themselves.

The goal is to get the word out about safer sex and HIV prevention in a catchy format and impart small snippets of knowledge about practicing safer sex and about HIV/STDs.

The project is tentatively named "Safety Net," but the community has kind of dismissed it as too... obvious? Too heavy-handed?, because of the "safety" thing, and the "falling" and implication, that someone "needs" a safeguard, which is potentially dis-empowering.

Please name my program! Something catchy & fun that can be promoted. Only rules: it has to be inclusive (can't be like GAYsomething) and it can't be NC-17 rated, coz DPH has to approve. (e.g., one of my team members suggested calling it F*CKERS, as an acronym for "Friends Under Cover Keeping Everyone Really Safe.... um, no!)

Oh, if you want to see the existing logo, which I kinda like, but just not the name, you can go here.

I need MeFi's help on this one, because I've been entrenched in the program so long I can't think of anything else, and the guys in the community are also kind of stumped.

No glove...awww, sad, no love...

nakedcodemonkey — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 11:31:55 -0800

Can you hook a gal up? I'm looking for recommendations for a good latex-free, powder-free disposable exam glove for safe and very tactile sex. I understand nitrile is strongest, and slides on well. But does does such a smooth fit make your hand extra sweaty? I have mild eczema, so potentially that's a problem. And how does vinyl compare in your opinion?

Most options available in either material seem to assume that one is a lab tech wanting to restore fine motor control via added fingertip texture. For my purposes, this is less than ideal. I'd rather find something with a completely smooth glide. I've contacted a few manufacturers whose product details are ambiguous on this front, but so far they've been slow to reply.

Finally, it's unclear to me which size to get. Nitrile gloves in particular apparently run small. For dishwashing gloves, medium is a quite loose though comfortable fit; while small runs slightly short in the fingertips. Can you help me translate this into good sizing for an exam glove?

oh, baby?

streetdreams — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:05:15 -0800

From a safer sex standpoint, how risky is playing with breast milk? It is a bodily fluid, but I can't seem to find much information about it in this context. I know that HIV is transmissible through breast milk, but are there other sexually transmitted (or other) diseases that can be carried through that medium, or other risks that it would be important to know about?

Dental damned if you do....

Jake Apathy — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 18:08:46 -0800

Sexfilter : How risky a behavior is analingus? Websites (including Wikipedia) make it sound super-risky. If I know that my partner has no STDs and no hepatitis, what are my risks, realistically?

I figure I'd want her to take a shower first. Also, one website suggests cleaning the area with a Tucks pad. Is this a good or bad idea?

Also, is it really necessary to use a dental dam?

Non-monogamy Filter: Do you have experience with fluid bonding in a committed non-monogamous relationship?

allterrainbrain — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 20:10:19 -0800

Non-monogamy Filter. Do you have experience with fluid bonding in a committed non-monogamous relationship? (Or have you considered it and decided against it, or do you otherwise have thoughts about it?) I have several long-term relationships (ranging from 4 to 9 years old), and both I and these long-term partners have other partners & contacts. Like most people in our circles, we're all highly safety-conscious and consistent with latex (as a rough summary, my standards are "barriers for oral & penetration with partners I know to have standards as consistent as mine; barriers for everything in groups and/or with partners whose standards I don't yet know & trust").

In logical terms, I definitely understand & accept that all this latex-consciousness is a small price to pay for the luxury of living the life that's right for me & having these excellent relationships. But I'm pushing 30 and I've never had unprotected sex, and I'd really (really) like to have some. I'm sure part of this is just the forbidden-fruit issue (in that unprotected sex is basically my only significant unrealizable fantasy). Still, I'm wondering about the hybrid solution some people use, which is usually called fluid bonding.

That's where two people (or occasionally more, but it would be two in my case) agree to be perfectly consistent using barriers for every contact with outside partners so they can stop using barriers with each other as soon as both of them have gone through the test-wait-test cycle for HIV/etc. Obviously, this requires absolute trust between the two people: you have to trust your partner not only to be totally consistent with the standards you've agreed on for outside partners, but also to *tell* you without delay if there's ever any break in that consistency (so you can start using barriers with each other again until you've gone through another test-wait-test cycle).

The person I'd be doing it with is someone I trust absolutely in human/ethical terms (and, like me, he doesn't have drug- or alcohol-impaired sex, so there's not that risk of decreased awareness/responsisbility). But as we all know, even correctly used barriers have a slight failure potential, so my current setup is safer statistically than even a perfectly executed fluid-bonded setup could be. And since I'm female, there would also be the significant issue of the effects & expense of hormonal birth control, which I've never had to think about before.

So although I've seen fluid bonding work beautifully for a few pairs of people I know (including a real "role model" couple who've been together almost as long as I've been alive), I may not want to try it yet. Still, I wanted to post and see if people here have experiences or thoughts to share. Thanks for any input!

Is dental dam usage common?

spork — Wed, 31 Mar 2004 21:19:18 -0800

Are dental dams commonly used in the dating scene?