My uncle is dying - the doctor says days or weeks. I haven't said anything to him, or his wife, or his kids, since they got the cancer diagnosis a few months ago. Our families have had a historically fractured relationship, so it all feels very awkward to me. Please help me figure out what to appropriately say to them.
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posted by raztaj
on Feb 25, 2013 -
10 answers
Marriage fizzling; need your best holiday coping methods to get through the rest of the year.
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 4, 2012 -
12 answers
Several months ago, for my partner's birthday, my MIL decided to gift us with an electric kettle. We were happy, because we had been planning to get one, and said as much to her. But then she couldn't find the "right one" (she's quite particular about aesthetics) and now the whole idea seems to have slipped off her radar. But the winter is approaching, we're making a lot of tea, and we would really really like to have that kettle. Do we remind her, buy it ourselves, or what?
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posted by gakiko
on Sep 28, 2012 -
28 answers
What are some "home-spun" phrases that someone might not think are racist, but actually have racist origins? Or phrases that originated in a non-racist fashion, but are now considered racist? (Like "call a spade a spade" or "free, white, and twenty-one") Bonus points if you can give me non-racist substitutes I can offer an older relative.
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posted by corb
on Aug 6, 2012 -
97 answers
How do I deal with a family member that turns offhand comments into personal attacks against them, as well as putting themselves down.
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posted by Dynex
on May 12, 2012 -
13 answers
Relatives are going to buy me Christmas gifts whether I like it or not. Relatives have a different set of values than me. What should I ask for so that I don't end up with junk?
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posted by hishtafel
on Nov 23, 2011 -
54 answers
I'm extremely bitter about my situation living at home with my parents and caring for my relative. Please help me be less bitter.
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posted by anonymous
on Aug 23, 2011 -
31 answers
Met the parents. They're crazy. Need to develop strategies to cope and set clear and unavoidable bondaries NOW before the cycle of stupid and exploitative behavior continues.
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posted by These Birds of a Feather
on Jul 6, 2011 -
45 answers
Is there any way to save my relationship with a relative who has suddenly distanced himself after marriage?
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posted by timsneezed
on May 29, 2011 -
14 answers
ADHD and relatives: both my partner and I have ADHD and we both have problems with visiting my mother. How to deal with this conflict?
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posted by Flitcraft
on May 15, 2011 -
26 answers
Is there any way to make facebook so that any person who is not your friend is blocked?
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 10, 2010 -
16 answers
In 2006 my sister Emy took on a condo loan for her then-future mother-in-law, Mabel, who could not qualify. Things have not worked out as well as she planned. What recourse does she have?
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posted by vilcxjo_BLANKA
on Sep 23, 2010 -
15 answers
When you "win" an argument with your spouse, it's not really winning, or is it?
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posted by abdulf
on Sep 17, 2010 -
47 answers
A close relative whom I don't want to alienate, has made a very public request from me for a donation towards a cause I don't believe in. What should I do?
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posted by KWittman
on Jan 9, 2010 -
56 answers
I need an argument settled over the proper title for each of these relatives: (1) Your great-aunt's children, (2) Your cousin's children. Are they both called second cousin or cousin once removed, or something completely different?
posted by (bb|[^b]{2})
on Sep 19, 2009 -
20 answers
The Family Business: Have you left it? Please tell me about your experiences doing so. Especially if you were expected to be the one to carry it on after your parents' retirement/death.
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posted by sio42
on Jul 23, 2009 -
8 answers
How do I stop resenting my brother's wife, stop mentally competing with her for the love and approval of my parents, and stop worrying about falling to the margins of my family?
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 23, 2009 -
15 answers
My wife discovered our names and "locations" (defined here as city and state) on a shady website called
Reunion.com (Wikipedia). I know we've probably been scraped from a variety of online resources, but her so-called "profile" includes the names of her parents and siblings, as well as my parents and my brother. How did Reunion.com make this association?
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posted by CancerMan
on Nov 11, 2008 -
8 answers
My father and his mother were separated from his father by events in WWII in Poland. I'd like to find him. I've tried a few things but would much appreciate more help. Are there any Polish Mefites out there or anyone who has searched for people who are probably dead.
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posted by sien
on Nov 10, 2008 -
10 answers
My uncle's wife has an uncle through marriage whose first cousin's grand-niece lives in my apartment building. Are my neighbor and I related?
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posted by werty
on Sep 8, 2005 -
29 answers
Tonight the father of a close friend of mine passed away. In the last month this is the third relative he has lost and his mother is in cancer treatement : more inside
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posted by elpapacito
on Jan 11, 2005 -
11 answers
Right before our big Thanksgiving dinner, my doorbell rang, and the man I found on my front porch introduced himself as my brother. Since I didn't know him, I disbelieved him, even though he looked just like my father and knew everything about him, and our family.
I turned him away rather abruptly, rudely, in fact. I'm sure I hurt his feelings, probably badly. But then I asked my mother if she knew anything about this, and well, turns out that he is, in fact, my brother, the product of an affair my father had when I was 3 years old. My mother found out just about a month ago, but members of my father's family have known for decades, and never told us, even when my father died. (More than 20 years ago.)
I don't know the guy's (last) name or how to contact him. I'm not sure if I want to try to find out. Apparently members of my father's family could put me in touch with him, as one of my aunts is the one who gave him my address. But I'm not sure if I want to contact him. What on earth would I say?
What would you do?
posted by anonymous
on Nov 25, 2004 -
27 answers
