27 posts tagged with relationships and infidelity.
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Trying to live happily ever after, after an affair. But with a twist.

I love my boyfriend dearly and we have had a very strong exclusive relationship for over a year now. However, we started as an affair while he was married. I am still struggling with the guilt I have over this. Are there any resources out there for helping people deal with the aftermath of the affair when the couple is now the husband and the mistress and not the husband and wife? [more inside]
posted by Argyle Sock Puppet on Jan 9, 2014 - 45 answers

Need advice: Is it time for a divorce, or do I ride this out?

Should I seriously be considering a divorce now, or give it more time? And if I do want to initiate a split--how do I do it, since this will totally blindside him? What else should I do to prepare if it comes to that? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 4, 2013 - 27 answers

Could you tell me how to succeed in being unfaithful?

Please tell me stories about cheating or being cheated on. Or, pretend to be a sociopath for a few minutes, and give advice on how to successfully cheat and get away with it. [more inside]
posted by Bathtub Bobsled on Apr 7, 2013 - 55 answers

Is is selfish to break up with him or selfish to stay with him?

We were in a wonderful relationship for 1.5 years. He went abroad. Sick with loneliness and old emotional problems (BPD) that came back when he was gone, I cheated on him. Then I moved abroad with him, where he found out. He forgave me and wants us to stay together, I'm not sure what the fairest thing to do is. [more inside]
posted by mangoprawn on Apr 26, 2012 - 33 answers

Do politicians have to be closed about their openness?

Weinergate wonderings: Can a politician have an open relationship? [more inside]
posted by anya32 on Jun 7, 2011 - 20 answers

Abandon ship, once and for all, or fight for what I have?

Seven months ago I cheated on my partner. Six months ago I came clean to him. Three months ago we broke up. This past week we have begun to spend some time together, and I feel like we both reached a breakthrough last night. Am I crazy to have this renewed faith in/willingness to work for our love? Do I need to finally let it go? Much more inside. [more inside]
posted by fignewton on Apr 21, 2011 - 23 answers

How do I cope with being considered a slut?

How do I cope with being considered a slut? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 1, 2010 - 49 answers

How do I introduce the idea of a polyamorous relationship?

How can I tell my very monogamous husband that I am polyamorous and would like an open relationship? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 23, 2010 - 98 answers

Anxiety? or my gut instinct?

Trust my instincts? or just relationship anxiety? [more inside]
posted by mrspeacock on Apr 18, 2010 - 14 answers

Collegedorkfilter: He's acting like he's in love with me, and I feel the same, but he seems to have another girl.

Collegedorkfilter: He's acting like he's in love with me, and I feel the same, but he seems to have another girl. What do I do? Nerdy ass literary references, awkward silences, and lots of hot-wild cuddling action ensue! [more inside]
posted by cheberet on Mar 20, 2010 - 41 answers

Should I tell the Other Man's Wife?

I recently discovered that my partner of 9 years has been having an emotionally and sexually intimate affair with a man for the last 2+ years. The man is married with two teenage children. Though devastated, I'm glad I now know the truth, and I feel very betrayed by two of our close friends who knew of my partner's infidelity and didn't tell me. Given that, should I tell this guy's wife? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 27, 2010 - 75 answers

Help! Need advice for giving friend advice!!

How do I tell my friend the truth in a way that she can hear it, then take what she can from it and do what feels right to her? [more inside]
posted by Hydrofiend on Nov 29, 2009 - 29 answers

Is cheating in relationships in your twenties and thirties inevitable?

Is infidelity in relationships in your twenties and thirties inevitable? I recently was cheated on by my ex-boyfriend days after we started living together and many of my friends who are in their late-30s are not surprised. [more inside]
posted by countingbackwards on Aug 2, 2009 - 33 answers

What did he do that made you cheat?

If you've felt the temptation to cheat, or have cheated, on a guy: what sorts of things was he neglecting to do around that time? Or what things was he doing? [more inside]
posted by surenoproblem on Jul 13, 2009 - 32 answers

How do I cope with bitterness and vengefulness toward my ex?

My husband of 17 years had an affair and left me for someone else. Three years later, I’m still feeling bitter and vengeful. Please help me cope. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 3, 2009 - 38 answers

Do I really have to say goodbye to all that, so soon?

I love my husband. But we can't really have sex, and that's not going to change. I'm thinking of looking elsewhere for it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 28, 2009 - 74 answers

Quitting the competition, while still running the race

Help me get my focus back on my own life and happiness and stop comparing/competing with my ex in my own mind... and stop having how I compare with others as a condition to my happiness/self esteem in general... [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Jun 16, 2009 - 13 answers

Should I try to date him or is it already too messy?

Should I try to date him or is it already too messy? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 21, 2009 - 25 answers

Help me figure out what to do about my relationship.

Help me sort out my feelings about the relationship I’m in because I just can’t seem to figure it out. (long and complicated - sorry!) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 25, 2007 - 23 answers

Now I Know How Simone Warne Must Have Felt.

Is my fiancée cheating on me, or is this simply a case of a wrong number at the wrong time? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 29, 2007 - 131 answers

How do I deal with my anger over cheating?

My girlfriend cheated. We're separated now. What do I do with this anger? [more inside]
posted by Brainy on Feb 3, 2006 - 43 answers

How to fall out of love

I have no problems falling in love - it's falling out I need some help with. [more inside]
posted by luftmensch on Dec 13, 2005 - 29 answers

Dealing with small infidelity?

My relationship is wonderful. It's been a couple of years and we have big plans, a definitely long term view, get along perfectly, still have passion, all that... So why did I kiss a friend while really, really drunk the other night? And what should I do about it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 22, 2005 - 55 answers

Well-spouse needs guidance.

Can I seek companionship outside my marriage and still respect myself in the morning? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 6, 2005 - 31 answers

Is Ignorance Bliss?

If you were cheated on and broken up with, would you want to know that you were cheated on or would ignorance be bliss?
posted by anonymous on Dec 28, 2004 - 37 answers

Relationship past betrayal.

Dear Ask Mefi: How can two people who love each other get back together after a tragic breakup? She and I lived together for many years. The relationship ended because she cheated on me. Otherwise, she was the love of my life. Now, years later, I have discovered through mutual friends that she refers to it as one of the biggest mistakes of her life but doesn't even forgive herself. I might be able to forgive under the right circumstances and if she is sincere. But, I don't want to initiate contact because I still feel hurt. She won't initiate contact because she doesn't feel she deserves a second chance. Is there anyplace to go from here? Advice, experiences welcome...
posted by anonymous on Nov 5, 2004 - 25 answers

What are the rates of marital infidelity in western nations?

Can anyone point me to information about rates of marital infidelity in western nations? I'm particularly interested in the United States, but figures on other first world nations would provide interesting material for comparison.
posted by Irontom on Feb 5, 2004 - 5 answers

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