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2850 posts tagged with relationships.
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Boyfriend bad juju beanplating

Dating for 6 weeks, "officially" boyfriend and girlfriend, have been spending time together most days. I've excitedly told my friends about him and invited him to a 30th and on a group holiday a few of us were going on. Last weekend he went to a farewell party on the Friday and a birthday on the Saturday without inviting me, but came to my place afterwards (on the Friday he left my house to go to the farewell party, then returned afterwards). I felt disappointed that he seemed less excited to introduce me to his friends than I did him and my gut feeling is not good. Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by lifethatihavenotlivedyet on Mar 5, 2015 - 29 answers

Overcoming an unhealthy crush?

I have a crush on my best friend's boyfriend—and we are all roommates. How can I overcome these feelings when we are in such close proximity? [more inside]
posted by kaisemic on Mar 3, 2015 - 45 answers

How to deal with friend's infidelities

My friend has been involved in a committed, sexually exclusive romantic relationship for over a year. However, he has already had multiple affairs outside of the relationship. His girlfriend does not know. I like and respect her and am sick of seeing this going on behind her back. Seeing my friend lie, cheat, etc. has also damaged my liking and respect for him. I want this stressful situation to end but do not know what I can ethically do. Please advise. [more inside]
posted by NeverGrowSoOldAgain on Mar 2, 2015 - 55 answers

Should I tell someone that her boyfriend cheated on her with me?

I recently broke up a serious, long term relationship with someone I loved, because I fell in love with someone else who I wanted to pursue a relationship with. This other person was also in a long term relationship and claimed that he'd broken up with his girlfriend but needed to date me secretly as she was bipolar and would "break all his things" if she found out, but also showed concern that her finding out would destabilize her mental health. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 26, 2015 - 63 answers

I am feeling stuck in a serious rut. How to reboot?

In my mid-20s, going nowhere, full of shame. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 26, 2015 - 18 answers

Engaged in vicious war with partner's identical twin. Break up now?

I live with my partner and their identical twin. The twin and I want to murder each other. One of us has to move out. My relationship is going well for now, but I can't guarantee it will last, and I don't want to come between them. On the other hand, this conflict is definitely the twin's fault, and my partner and I would not be breaking up this soon otherwise. Who should go: me or the twin? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 22, 2015 - 33 answers

Websites about love and self-worth/knowledge/respect/etc

I really like this website and I was wondering if you can recommend similar ones. [more inside]
posted by divina_y_humilde on Feb 21, 2015 - 4 answers

Grandma, you are my negative role model.

My grandmother has always been a difficult person to love, or even to like. I feel obligated to continue a relationship with her, partly out of a sense of pity for a lonely person approaching the end of life, and partly because it will spare my parents from having to deal with the emotional fallout of the end of our relationship. Is it even possible to have a relationship with a relative based on feelings like these, and if so, how should I go about it? [more inside]
posted by Chuck Barris on Feb 19, 2015 - 28 answers

Do you think this is enough for a Valentine's Day gift?

I am currently in a relationship of 4 months. I have a couple things for my boyfriend for Valentine's Day but I'm not sure if it's enough. Opinions pretty please?? :) [more inside]
posted by anon1129 on Feb 14, 2015 - 13 answers

Is this relationship worth pursuing?

I am 36 years old, female, divorced...about two months ago, I met a guy that is from Egypt and is Muslim. He has been in the U.S. for about 7 years, and is now 32 years old. We have a lot of fun together, but now lately I am questioning if a future is really possible. First of all, I was raised Catholic...I'm not really practicing now, but I don't know if I can raise my children as Muslims (and if I were to marry this guy, it is non-negotiable; the children MUST be raised Muslim). [more inside]
posted by Maggsie97 on Feb 10, 2015 - 32 answers

Love & Money: I have some / they have lots.

I am not even sure how to pose this question – it’s a jumble of feelings I am rather embarrassed about -- and money. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 4, 2015 - 19 answers

Teach me how to date

Is it silly not to date multiple people at a time? [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Feb 3, 2015 - 18 answers

Have you learned to really accept your partner? How?

I am with a wonderful man. We love each other and see a future together, and have a good relationship. However, I am a perfectionist about relationships and a depressive (in therapy, on meds, regularly meditating), and sometimes I react absolutely terribly to his imperfections. Yes, I'm working on it in therapy with a great therapist, but please help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 1, 2015 - 44 answers

Wise or silly risk: Reconnect or let go?

What is the message in this set of mixed messages? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 30, 2015 - 21 answers

Mother is too reliant on me - how do I navigate this now?

My mother is increasingly reliant on me for the fulfilment of her emotional needs. Can I do anything to remedy this? [more inside]
posted by Kat_Dubs on Jan 30, 2015 - 17 answers

Likable to all except single men?

Why is it so easy for me to naturally make friends but never meet guys that ask me out? I always thought that people skills in both scenarios are transferable. The only difference I can think of are looks but I don't think that's my problem. [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on Jan 28, 2015 - 27 answers

Hey, Hive Mind. Could I be dating a narcissist?

I've recently began dating a guy who's coming on pretty strong. While I want to embrace what feels like someone who truly cares after a string of emotionally distant men, I'm feeling like it's too much, too soon, and I'm getting incredibly idealized. Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by shotinthedark on Jan 28, 2015 - 37 answers

Scared of attraction.

29 year old heterosexual male. I believe that I have social anxiety when it comes to talking to women I am attracted to - perhaps more than normal. This has meant very little sex or relationships throughout my life. Practical ideas for dealing with this would be appreciated. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 25, 2015 - 18 answers

Only a loser would settle for me

I can't imagine someone choosing to date me when there are people out there who are so much more successful, competent, fit, daring, worldly, and self-assured. So if someone likes me, I assume they can't do better than me, and that's a turnoff, because I'm not so great, so THEY must not be so great either. How can I get out of this mental trap? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2015 - 39 answers

my boyfriend likes to text other girls and I don't like that

WALL OF TEXT INSIDE. My boyfriend is perfect and wonderful and amazing except we have some terrible trust and commitment issues. Cycle(s) of emotional cheating and suspicious forgiveness. I don't know if it's too late to fix or even how to proceed in that direction if it's not. Help. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 23, 2015 - 64 answers

Is there an ethical way to have my cake and eat it too?

Hi Metafilter, I hope you can help with a question about ethics, fetishes, and relationships. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 19, 2015 - 46 answers

Why can I not get over my abusive boyfriend?

I broke up with my off/on boyfriend and am having a terrible time not approaching him to take me back, even though he is, um, nuts. Many words within. [more inside]
posted by DeadFlagBlues on Jan 17, 2015 - 47 answers

Dating Spock

I'm head over heels infatuated with a guy who has commitment issues and low emotional IQ. How to proceed without jeopardizing my own needs? [more inside]
posted by squirtle on Jan 16, 2015 - 31 answers

Partner's health problems are really tough on our relationship

Trying to deal with my partner's chronic health problems is tough, especially during times of stress. I already have some doubts about our relationship and this is only making it worse. Narcoleptics & narcoleptic lovers, give me your advice! Commiseration is welcome with your advice too. (More below the cut.) [more inside]
posted by vreify on Jan 13, 2015 - 30 answers

How can i tell if I'm the problem?

I feel like in most of my relationships I haven't been treated the way I want/deserve. I'd like to see whether this is really the case or if the problem is me. [more inside]
posted by ninjablob on Jan 13, 2015 - 29 answers

I drank too much and made my boyfriend "furious."

I don't remember what I did. How can I defuse the situation? [more inside]
posted by pumpkinseed on Jan 10, 2015 - 24 answers

Creative approaches to reconciling?

If my boyfriend and I stay together, how can we improve our relationship without getting mired in the distrust that can come with having almost parted or in the effortful work of changing our interactions? [more inside]
posted by newtonstreet on Jan 9, 2015 - 7 answers

Can I financially divorce my husband?

We own a mid-sized business together. Communication between us has effectively stopped, mainly because of differing business styles. We still talk, but he stopped listening about 10 years ago. It’s gotten to the point where we act independently of each other in both our professional and personal lives. His actions have eroded my respect and trust for him, business-wise. I think the only way to save our 20 year marriage is to split financially, but I don’t know if that is possible. [more inside]
posted by tuckeredout on Jan 8, 2015 - 40 answers

Struggling with myself, my feelings, and how to do life

I'm doing everything they say to heal and move on, to get your life together. I try to be as social as I can with good friends who understand the situation and am focusing as much energy into work and school. I'm afraid of burnout though and how to unravel these emotions when I'm lying awake at night and questioning if I did the right thing? [more inside]
posted by lunastellasol on Jan 6, 2015 - 7 answers

Husband pushed me down. Now what?

On Christmas morning, my husband and I got into a verbal fight about a movie. He then charged at me and pushed me down. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 4, 2015 - 79 answers

Things you wish you had talked about before getting married

My partner and I are discussing getting married within the next year, and I thought I'd get the hive's opinion on important topics to go over before tying the knot. [more inside]
posted by Blissful on Jan 4, 2015 - 37 answers

Navigating a 10 Year Age Gap While Dating

Yesterday an incredible guy messaged me on Match and I can't stop looking at his profile because he seems like such a great fit for me. The only catch is that he's 10-11 years older than I am (though still in his 30s) and that's making me very leery. Am I right to be or am I being silly? [more inside]
posted by Hermione Granger on Jan 3, 2015 - 51 answers

How to handle people opposed to your relationship?

After a long and difficult period (we met while married to other people) I'm now in a very loving relationship. However there is inevitable fallout. I feel a bit lost for guidance as to how to navigate the new territory I find myself in. I'd like recommendations for resources, blogs, books, forums, whatever, but also personal experiences of how you handled this kind of situation, namely with people who are very much not happy with the situation. Or maybe you are/were the not happy person - were you able to move past it? [more inside]
posted by outoftime on Dec 31, 2014 - 33 answers

Worried my boyfriend might be gay?

I am becoming worried that my boyfriend of 2.5 months might be gay. Are these valid reasons to be suspicious that he is homosexual? How should I apporach the situation? [more inside]
posted by anon1129 on Dec 29, 2014 - 32 answers

How do I cope with my offensive roommates?

I'm a woman who is living with two straight cismen who routinely have loud, offensive, misogynistic/racist/queerphobic conversations in the apartment's common areas. I'd like them to stop doing this in shared spaces because it makes me and my guests uncomfortable. I need tips for talking to them. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 27, 2014 - 25 answers

I don't want to see you but here you are

I just found out that my ex is planning on attending a New Year's Eve party I am going to and it is causing me a lot of stress. Strategies for dealing with this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 26, 2014 - 17 answers

So I'm the common denominator, right?

I'm struggling with the idea of not internalizing rejection and trying to come to terms with why I've had so much trouble with relationships in a romantic context. Normally I'm able to make really good decisions, but for some reasons with relationships I seem to be hitting the proverbial brick wall. Please classify my snowflake. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 14 answers

I want to want you to want it (that way)

I am having trouble directing my kinky desires towards my long-term partner. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 8 answers

Family Drama Filter: Help me distance myself from a parent

I've come to realize over the years that while I love my father, I am so different from him, and do not share his and his wife's (he is remarried) lifestyle and values and really wish I could come to accept it and completely distance myself from them. Please help me do this. [more inside]
posted by SanSebastien on Dec 21, 2014 - 7 answers

Post-coital repulsion

I use sex-related words in my question, so I've placed it in the extended area in case anyone is browsing at a prudish workplace. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 17 answers

Was this a weird thing to do or am I just having major anxiety?

How can I escape a spiraling anxiety and shame based mood and be realistic? I'm drivong myself crazy. [more inside]
posted by anon1129 on Dec 20, 2014 - 29 answers

How do I protect myself emotionally as a submissive?

I'm a bi female in my early 30s, just out of a decade long very vanilla relationship. I live in NYC and have been exploring my submissive side. Really enjoying it. Like, alot. I have never had better sex in my life and it is amazing. I am extremely submissive and I'm having a little bit of difficultly making sure I am emotionally safe. Because of the nature of my situation, I can't really talk to my usual family or friend connections when I need to vent. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 20, 2014 - 24 answers

Boyfriend texting another girl?

When my boyfriend (of 6 years) and I had a fight, I noticed he was texting all night. I had a look at his phone out of anger, and I wish I hadn't, because now I can't un-see what I saw, nor stop thinking about it. It's probably nothing, but it's got me checking. I know I need to stop, but I need to deal with this issue at hand first. Should I confront him? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 18, 2014 - 31 answers

Why won’t you listen?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! We are going to fail!

A friend and former colleague came to us as subject matter experts in international sales and market development. He came to us for our expertise but he will not listen to our recommendations and is putting us on the brink of failure and this is a company that should not be failing. What are techniques for dealing with stubborn people that refuse to listen and learn in a professional situation? [more inside]
posted by Che boludo! on Dec 16, 2014 - 17 answers

Making choices about whether to drink alcohol when at home or not

My 58 year old husband who is soon to retire from a CEO job(ie high stress) loves alcohol and drinks each night. When we are at home, he offers it to me. I have a love/hate relationship with it and seem to get pulled into drinking with him and then regret it when I get sleepy during a movie or feel somewhat impaired reading a book. [more inside]
posted by seekingsimplicity on Dec 16, 2014 - 31 answers

Am I looking a gifthorse in the mouth?

I found the greatest guy when I wasn't even looking. But I'm not too long out of a relationship (10 months) where I think I really loved him (despite current man looking so much better on paper), intimacy is taking a while to grow and I just feel a bit wary and not sure I'm into him some of the time. It's been 3/4 months of dating but I'd now say we're firmly headed to relationship territory. But I don't want to stay and waste this person's time if he's not the one for me. I also don't want to throw away something which could be really special, and this person is special, but maybe I know that on paper but don't really appreciate it which doesn't seem like a good start to a relationship. [more inside]
posted by starstarstar on Dec 14, 2014 - 7 answers

I will give you space until it comes out of your ears

It's early days in our relationship yet, and I like this guy tremendously, but his communication practices are driving me up the wall. Am I being too demanding or do I have some basis for feeling neglected? more flakey snowflakeness inside [more inside]
posted by starcrust on Dec 9, 2014 - 42 answers

Dating advice for an inexperienced neurotic person

I've been using OkCupid for a few months now and have been on around 4 dates with different people. I (22) started talking to a woman (also 22) last month and we really hit it off online. We've met up twice now and had a lot of fun together (both dates were over 6 hours long) and we ended up kissing the last time we were together. At the end of the second date we talked about meeting up again, however I'm having serious doubts and anxiety. [more inside]
posted by fallingleaves on Dec 8, 2014 - 16 answers

Please help me decide if I should move back to NYC from SF

Can't decide if I should move back to NYC from SF. Please help me find some new ways to think about the problem. [more inside]
posted by apostate street preacher on Dec 4, 2014 - 27 answers

Domestic violence survivor needs help evaluating current relationship

We're both in our 30's, no kids. I'm not very experienced in healthy relationships and want to check my gut reactions to some things. I don't have girlfriends close enough to ask and my therapist says I'm just thinking too much. (ugh) [more inside]
posted by amirite on Dec 3, 2014 - 33 answers

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