My husband and I have been together for 9 years, married for the last 3. We met when I was 19, and him 21. Recently I have been feeling like I might want out. I still love him, but I am not sure that he is going to change in ways which I would prefer him to.
Should I tell him I want to separate or wait to see if things get better?
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posted by anonymous
on May 19, 2013 -
35 answers
Two people -- both in 40ish-- are talking about the possibility of moving in together. We are in a loving and serious long-term relationship. There has been an initial talk about how we might handle finances and we came to conclusion that there are many ways we could handle them. I read a few posts about how couples handle finances, but am looking for some more viewpoints/options for us to consider and discuss. Details inside.
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posted by anonymous
on May 6, 2013 -
11 answers
I've been in a relationship for 3 years, waiting on a proposal. I don't know if it will materialize. Lately I've been fantasizing about an ex-boyfriend who I made a marriage pact with.
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posted by anonymous
on May 3, 2013 -
48 answers
Either one of two things has happened. (1) I've met someone I'm very compatible with who has "matching baggage" and with some patience it will work out to be a happy, healthy, sustainable relationship. OR (2) I've met someone whose issues spell trouble for me, and I may need to cut my losses but I'm not sure where to start. I'm way too close to it, and on balance so far it's definitly something I want to keep working on because I care about him a lot and like how we fit together - but I need a reality check.
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 27, 2013 -
30 answers
How do I get rid of feelings of worthlessness, anxiety, and distance in my relationship that seem to occur when I'm not having sex?
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 18, 2013 -
29 answers
I want to be a healthy, fit person, and I want my partner to want that, too. What's the selling point? How can I convince my SO to make this change with me and notice how our generally very sedentary life is sucking the life out of our relationship? Help!
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 16, 2013 -
31 answers
The boyfriend will take things I say in totally the wrong way, how do I explain this to him without starting another argument? And he compares me to his ex when doing this stuff...long-winded details inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 16, 2013 -
36 answers
BreakupFilter: I think it's time for me to end my LDR. I know it's going to hurt my partner, I know I can't prevent that, but I'd like to do this with as much compassion as possible.
What does that look like, hive mind?
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 11, 2013 -
24 answers
How can you tell when you legitimately need to give a partner "space" and when you should just throw in the towel?
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 3, 2013 -
28 answers
I'm in a happy relationship but still have thoughts about my previous unhappy relationship. Sometimes it's worry that the current one will go sour like the previous one, and sometimes I actually wish the previous one had worked, even though it was toxic. How do I stop this and just focus on the present?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 31, 2013 -
8 answers
Why am I having so much trouble leaving an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship? Or, tell me about your experience with leaving and how long it took you.
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 28, 2013 -
19 answers
I've been married for a few more than 10 years. For most of that time, I did not really listen to my wife or honor her goals and desires for our life together. Starting in 2012, I have made a change in my attitude and actions, and we are communicating and making significant progress in our relationship. If it were just making the current state of affairs good, I think we're on a good track and we'd be ok. My question is: How do I make up for the previous ~10 years? If you want to email: accommodatee@mail.com. Thanks in advance for any advice, here or via email.
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 20, 2013 -
30 answers
I'm a year and a half into my first serious relationship and it has a lot going for it. But, almost every time we now go see a movie together, or check out a concert, or go somewhere new for dinner, I spend more time worrying about rather she's having a good time than actually enjoying it myself. It's worse if it's something I picked out or suggested, and I find myself avoiding suggesting something I think I'll enjoy because I get nervous about her reaction. She has really relaxed standards for entertainment and usually enjoys what I suggest, so I know it's me and not her. Anyone have experience with dealing with this in their relationships?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 10, 2013 -
16 answers
Looking for resources for supporting a partner (and my own mental health) in an ongoing, possibly abusive relationship with a family member.
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 26, 2013 -
8 answers
Is it better to just break up with my SO, or tell them how anxious I am about moving in together?
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 25, 2013 -
25 answers
Need advice to sort out my marriage after a very stressful time - very extended explanation inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 12, 2013 -
15 answers
Am I a terrible person? My partner and I have been dating for 3.5 years, living together for one. In that time, he's cut off contact with two of his friends who were also significant exes.
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 6, 2013 -
38 answers
How do you deal with intense ambivalent feelings in a relationship, especially when they may be colored by a mood disorder?
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 1, 2013 -
8 answers
I'm confused by my boyfriend's criticisms of my personality. I can't tell if they're legitimate problems I should work on in this relationship because I will encounter the same issues with most perceptive guys, or if it's a sign that he'll never fully accept who I am.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 31, 2013 -
82 answers
Not-insignificant age gap [5 years +] in our long-term relationship: she's the older one. Can it be salvaged?
I'm 28, SO is 33. We've had a great, loving, 4-year relationship. The past few months have put a heavy strain on us - work, holidays, a death in the family - this spurred her into thinking more about the future.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 28, 2013 -
63 answers
So, my girlfriend is in her early 30s, as am I. We've been dating for almost a year; we're moving in together and it's overall great - but I'm starting to get irked that she leaves almost every saturday morning, and comes back almost every sunday night, to go to her parents who live in another state. I love her; and this is a silly problem; I don't want to make it one, but I'm at a loss on how to react...
posted by anonymous
on Jan 27, 2013 -
35 answers
I am done with letting limerence rule my life. Tell me your stories of conquering limerence. How did you cope? Is it even really possible to say "no more limerence" if you're prone to it?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 23, 2013 -
15 answers
I love my girlfriend. However, she's not curious, and so we don't have discussions. I don't know what to do about it, as it's rapidly starting to affect my feelings towards her.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 21, 2013 -
85 answers
I'm a 20 year old girl, and I've never been in a relationship. I feel weird about that. Where do I meet guys, apart from school, and how do I get more confidence?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 17, 2013 -
19 answers
I am jealous of the fact that my good friend is hardly around because she's got a new boyfriend. Very happy for her, but am very uncomfortable with my jealousy. Need some perspective and help dealing.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 15, 2013 -
22 answers
My husband lied to me in a multi-part, well crafted way, about something stupid. I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable, and I don't know where to go from here.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 11, 2013 -
48 answers
I haven't had sex in more than three years. I am going out of my freaking mind. One of my New Year's resolutions is that I must end this dry spell. I have a friend with whom I would like to start sharing some benefits. How do I go about this?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 5, 2013 -
38 answers
How do I reconcile a basic difference between my live-in-partner and myself about recreation? One enjoys something active now and again, the other always wants something passive. What is a happy compromise?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 4, 2013 -
32 answers
How do I decide whether this relationship is worth staying and working on or leaving and working on myself?
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 30, 2012 -
31 answers
I'm looking for breakup advice. Male breaking with a female, long-distance in a poly relationship. Special snowflake details inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 30, 2012 -
13 answers
An unexpected hookup with a coworker crush at a Christmas party has opened up the possibility of a new, exciting relationship. How do I slow things down to a comfortable pace?
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 25, 2012 -
10 answers
I'm looking for practical suggestions on finding casual sex in the context of an open relationship.
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 19, 2012 -
19 answers
I didn't cheat on my girlfriend but it might look like I did; I flirted with my friend but I don't want it to be emotional. What to do?
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 13, 2012 -
24 answers
Lost my girlfriend (of 18 months) and I quit my job. She thought I was not her first priority since I chose to take up a new job, I am completely depressed.
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 4, 2012 -
25 answers
My friends B and N have been together for years. They are happy together, supportive, and good people. But N is regularly verbally abusive to B, in small, sarcastic ways. It makes me (and other friends) uncomfortable. Can I do anything to help?
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 25, 2012 -
40 answers
There's nothing wrong with my relationship...except that I don't want to be in it anymore.
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 14, 2012 -
46 answers
This Question Makes Me Feel Silly: I like him, think he likes me. . .but I honestly can't tell whether or not he's gay. Need advice on how best to handle clearing this up.
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 1, 2012 -
38 answers
My fiancee is lying fairly often about trivial, frivolous things. Should I be concerned, or am I just hopelessly insecure? (special snowflake inside)
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 25, 2012 -
32 answers
I recently met a guy at a party, and figured that we hit it off. But I have no previous experience in this area, and I'm unsure about a couple of things...
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 21, 2012 -
6 answers
