1637 posts tagged with relationship.
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How do I deal with these complicated feelings?

At the last minute this evening, my SO changed our plans due to the needs of his ex. This isn't the first time it's happened. How do I handle this type of situation without feeling like a jerk? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 28, 2015 - 45 answers

How to deal with a family who disproves of the partner that you love?

I've seen questions like mine all over the internet. I've scoured the internet for endless hours in search of effective coping strategies, but every situation is unique. I'm hoping to find some valuable information for my own situation, which I fear may crumble if I do. [more inside]
posted by soochala on Apr 28, 2015 - 43 answers

Should I break up?

I'm in a 9 month relationship and have been wrestling with the decision to break up for most of its duration. I don't know if the problem lies with me or if the relationship is truly a bad one. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by CheeseAndRice on Apr 23, 2015 - 17 answers

"You can't handle the truth!" But I need to learn how to...

Last week, my partner admitted that he's been not just hiding things, but outright lying to me. The revelations hurt, but I need honesty if we're to stay together. How do I make it safe for my partner to tell me the truth when it's repeatedly been so startling and upsetting? Difficulty level: partner is dealing with Major Depression, and has been near-suicidal. [more inside]
posted by Someone Else's Story on Apr 17, 2015 - 56 answers

Rough waters in early-ish sobriety

Posting for a friend: "My SO is several months sober, after a few decades of alcohol and drug abuse, and is having a rough time of it. They chose sobriety, and often say they're happy to be sober, that they know it's the right choice, etc. Basically, the sobriety was not court-ordered but a result of "enough is enough." They're seeing a therapist regularly, going to meetings, taking an antidepressant...and still feeling crappy. What can we do? [more inside]
posted by elken on Apr 16, 2015 - 17 answers

Need relationship advice

So this is an interesting relationship situation for sure, but I need advice: [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 14, 2015 - 45 answers

The truth is, Mom I just don't like you.

I need some advice and strategies on how to deal with my mother and survive seeing her without feeling like crap for a week afterwards. [more inside]
posted by sisforsock on Apr 5, 2015 - 29 answers

Life After No-Drinking-Allowed: what's the next step?

I gave my problematic-drinker boyfriend an ultimatum to stop drinking for at least 30 days, and he accepted the challenge. Which is great... except I have no game plan for what comes next. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 4, 2015 - 33 answers

Am I being supporting or sacrificial? Taking things back a step

My boyfriend (just turned 30, and I'm 24) of nearly 7 months is very recently divorced (it was finalized 4 months ago and they have been separated for 9). He's the most open and communicative person I've ever met and keeps me as much in the loop as I need to be about where he's at and how he's feeling regarding his loss (but also keeps some details to himself that I probably don't really need to know about.) Our relationship started out very mutual and enthusiastic, and mostly still is but he's taking a few steps back to analyze himself and it's triggering my relationship anxiety. I don't know whether to trust my gut or quiet the fear. [more inside]
posted by korrasamus on Mar 30, 2015 - 26 answers

Is online dating a good idea? If so, which site should I choose?

I'm 23 years old and I have had limited experience with dating in person. I'm pretty busy with school that it keeps me from meeting people I like. Therefore, I've considered doing online dating but I'm a little concerned about catfish and people who just want to hookups. For those of you who have experience with online dating, does online dating have a good pool of people who look for a serious relationship? If so, are paid sites like eHarmony or match.com better than free sites such as OKCupid? Thank you for your response!
posted by missybitsy on Mar 24, 2015 - 31 answers

Ten years of EXTREME doubt and regret about relationship

Its been ten years since I broke up with my daughter's father for the first time (of many), and I still go through periods of extreme doubt and regret. I'm not talking about having fleeting moments of uncertainty; I will literally ruminate for days about our relationship and what went wrong and wonder if we should/could fix it. [more inside]
posted by aprilc34 on Mar 22, 2015 - 22 answers

A name for people who don't adhere to the relationship escalator?

Is there a name for a subculture of people who do not adhere to the relationship escalator but are not strictly LGBTQ or polyamorous? [more inside]
posted by deathpanels on Mar 21, 2015 - 26 answers

I'm not being unreasonable... right?

My boyfriend has connections on LinkedIn that I would like him to get rid off. He thinks I'm being unreasonable. Am I? [more inside]
posted by milque on Mar 20, 2015 - 49 answers

Cross-cultural relationship, family problems

We are planning a future together... If only my family would accept him in spite of his race and religion. Snowflakes entail. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 17, 2015 - 20 answers

How do I navigate my eating disorder with my (likely former) boyfriend?

At my therapist's suggestion, I want my boyfriend to treat my binge eating as if it is not negative, but actually positive. He claims that this is insane and akin to buying drinks for an alcoholic. This difference of opinion led me to say that we shouldn't see each other anymore, and I want to know if I made the right decision, or I am indeed being irrational. Long story ahead. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 17, 2015 - 25 answers

Long distance or bust!

I'm want to (eventually) move to be with a boyfriend 8,000 miles away. Am I being an idiot? Apologies in advance for the long letter inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2015 - 30 answers

Boyfriend acting strange after spending several nights together?

We're both in our 30's and have been together for 4 months. We made things official a few weeks ago, but only because I asked how he sees us and he responded that he thinks of us as being in a relationship. We've never spent this much time together before, and he's the kind of guy who needs to take a break for a 3 days after long weekend dates. I'm not clingy, he initiates most dates. [more inside]
posted by lohachata on Mar 11, 2015 - 58 answers

How to process personal criticism from a failed relationship?

Very messy breakup that involved a lot of confusing signals and a lot of personal criticism. How do I untangle this, get healthy, and work on being a better person? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 9, 2015 - 34 answers

Relationship anxiety went from non-existent to paralyzing

When I was younger, I was never anxious about hearing back from a girlfriend or not. (To a fault: I'd head off on a trip by myself for a couple of weeks and not even think about talking to them or hearing from them.) I didn't worry when I was in those relationships, and I didn't worry when they ended. Now, as soon as I start falling for someone, I feel anxious at every short gap in reassurance and communication. I'll sit at work doing nothing, just waiting to get a text or email back. Is this kind of change common? Is there a name for it? Are there common causes? Treatment?
posted by anonymous on Mar 4, 2015 - 7 answers

How do Indian Arranged Marriages work?

I will be visiting India soon to get an arranged marriage. I would like to know what to expect and how to handle the situation. [more inside]
posted by json12 on Mar 2, 2015 - 16 answers

How do you deal with rude people?

I'm really sick of dealing with rude people. Its like everywhere I go people are terribly rude and mean. Like people who are supposed to be doing their jobs and greeting you and being polite. I respect and treat people good but they are rude and condescending and it makes me so angry because I don't understand why they talk to me in such a way when I haven't done anything wrong. [more inside]
posted by home on Feb 27, 2015 - 46 answers

Am I being unreasonable?

I need some help understanding if my husband's behavior is completely out of line or if my expectations are completely out of line. [more inside]
posted by all the dead are dead alike on Feb 26, 2015 - 70 answers

How to deal with Mr. I'm always right? In a relationship.

I've recently moved in with my boyfriend of almost a year and we appear to be having a few teething problems. When we have a disagreement (which are very few and far between) my boyfriend always has to be right. 1.) this is very annoying on my behalf because were only human and no-one can be right 100% of the time and; [more inside]
posted by NorthernLass2468 on Feb 26, 2015 - 36 answers

Is he stringing me along or genuinely wants to take things slow?

Met someone almost a year ago and we get along wonderfully. We have wonderful conversations (can stay on the phone and/or hang out for hours), have great chemistry, and constantly talk about the future. However, he doesn't want to make things official because he wants to focus on school. Is this a cop-out? [more inside]
posted by penguingrl on Feb 23, 2015 - 47 answers

My boyfriend "forgot" me and let his ex stay during the holiday with him

Please help me get over the bitterness towards my boyfriend’s actions. I am turning into a person I truly dislike, but I can’t get over myself and all the bad feelings this story brought up. I have been with my man for almost three years in a LDR. He is great in so many ways and I do love him. However, I have lost my trust and confidence in him that he will be a considerate and respectful man, and a partner to count on in the future. [more inside]
posted by dreamsandhope on Feb 22, 2015 - 33 answers

Help me pull the plug on this relationship

AskMe, you're good at telling people when to end it. Help me get it into my head that my relationship is over. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 11, 2015 - 35 answers

Help me get started studying relationships.

I need to learn how to think about relationships that are "more than just" friendships. This needs to happen before I start to consider whether I want that kind of relationship, so I'm not looking for any kind of practical guide. Perhaps that means I need to read philosophy texts, in which case I'd like some recommendations for that; or maybe you have a better idea of what I need. [more inside]
posted by LogicalDash on Feb 7, 2015 - 10 answers

Is this guy interested in dating or just hooking up?

I met this 20-something guy through a mutual friend at a party and we've been texting each other for the past week. He insisted that we should go out drinking sometimes. When I talked to the mutual friend about him, she said that he thinks I'm cute, but she also mentioned that he admitted he had slept with at least 6 girls, of which only 1 was a serious girlfriend. Is there a good odd that he's only into me for sex? How can I tell? I'm at the point in my life where I want a serious relationship, and I'm not sure if I should give this guy a chance. Thanks for your help!
posted by missybitsy on Feb 3, 2015 - 22 answers

Help me break up with my awesome boyfriend without triggering my PTSD

I want to break up with my boyfriend and I'm really nervous about it. Special factor: PTSD. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 31, 2015 - 33 answers

Is financial issues in a relationship a deal breaker?

Been in a relationship with my partner for 2 years. I'm 26 and he is 28. We don't live together yet but have talked about it a couple of times throughout our relationship along with talking about having children. I make more money than him but he refuses to let me pay for dates, so we don't do as much as I would like to. He is responsible with money but barely has any disposable income. His expenses seem to be much higher than mine. Are financial issues a deal breaker in a relationship? [more inside]
posted by ruebeignet on Jan 30, 2015 - 31 answers

Long term traveling with partner, looking for tips and advice

We are thinking about quitting our jobs to travel for a year or so. I'm looking for general advice regarding RTW kind of traveling as well as traveling as a couple. [more inside]
posted by monologish on Jan 26, 2015 - 6 answers

When a man tells you "You are the one" does he really mean it?

How soon do you realize that the person you are with is the one you are marring? I am sure everyone is different and have a different opinion about this but, I just started to seeing this guy(we both are in 40s), we are doing great, we've been together every day since the day we met. I'm at his house every night and waking up with him every morning. So the things are more than great. But the bottom line is, I only have known him for 2 months. Yes we know alot about each other, he's trying to learn about me fastest he can. I see that every day. but 2 month is still 2 month. [more inside]
posted by heliosheath on Jan 26, 2015 - 47 answers

How to practice communicating with a SO

My SO and I are trying our hardest to communicate together, but we quickly get frustrated and have low patience. My SO frequently doesn't understand me when I say something/give instructions, even though I feel I am very clear. What are exercises we can do that will help us practice communicating with each other without getting frustrated? [more inside]
posted by bbqturtle on Jan 20, 2015 - 31 answers

Is there an ethical way to have my cake and eat it too?

Hi Metafilter, I hope you can help with a question about ethics, fetishes, and relationships. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 19, 2015 - 46 answers

A friend says he needs a breather. Now what?

A friend of mine who I considered (and actually, continue to consider) close just told me he needs a breather from the friendship. Twofold question: 1) can this possibly be headed anywhere good? and 2) has anyone else here been in this situation, and if so, will you share stories about how it turned out? Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 18, 2015 - 21 answers

I don't know if I am reading signs or reading into signs

I have a female friend at work who I would very much like to be into me and am not sure if due to that I am reading into things - I probably am. For example, "what does that sudden hug mean?" or "Is this a dinner date or just dinner?" [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 15, 2015 - 26 answers

How do you know if you're making the right decision or self-sabotaging?

Anxious people: how do you decipher when anxiety is getting the best of you, or if something just isn't right? In your experience, can guilt/anxiety prevent you from feeling full love? If I let him go, it's permanent, and I'm 100% terrified to make a mistake that hurts us both forever. [more inside]
posted by sandj2014 on Jan 12, 2015 - 30 answers

How to escalate small talk to medium talk?

I met this great guy in NYC on everyone's favorite dating website. We've been out a few weekends in a row and had a great time together, but I'm running in to a sort of roadblock, conversationally. We are both introverted and quiet, and we both find small talk is insanely boring. [more inside]
posted by Kestrelxo on Jan 4, 2015 - 16 answers

Can this 'bond' turn into a relationship?

I fell for a girl...we keep a really nice and friendly connection going on between us, but nothing more happens. She knows how I feel but keeps rejecting me. She have her reasons to do so though. [more inside]
posted by Nightrunner on Jan 3, 2015 - 21 answers

on a self-perpetuating downward spiral

I am having somewhat of a huge existential crisis at the moment after just exiting a 5-year serious long-term romantic relationship, one that I was hoping would be permanent and committed. I am having trouble coming to terms with the setup of my life and the course it is taking. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 2, 2015 - 15 answers

Dealing with the fact that someone you loved was not who you thought?

How do you reconcile the person you loved at the start with the not-so-nice actions they did to lead to the end of the relationship? How do you stop yourself from feeling stupid/hurt/betrayed/unable to trust? [more inside]
posted by gatsbyisgreat on Dec 30, 2014 - 30 answers

Romantic Triple Threat! How to move forward?

I’ve fallen for my coworker-friend-roommate I’ve known for a year-and-a-half, and I need advice on how to escalate without it all blowing up in my face. We've roomed together (just the two of us) for six weeks, but I've been away for half that time. Also, we get along well and flirt occasionally, but I’m the worst at reading signs. [more inside]
posted by Nunipaht on Dec 28, 2014 - 46 answers

How long do you keep trying, with kids in the mix?

At what point in the long, slow, steady decline of a marriage with young children does "we should keep trying to work things out, if only for the kids" become "for the kids' sake, we shouldn't be together"? [more inside]
posted by El Curioso on Dec 19, 2014 - 57 answers

Am I the asshole in this relationship?

I want an honest opinion on whether what I am upto could be considered cheating. It's a long read but I want to find out if I am wrong in what I am doing since I suspect my actions are hurting a woman emotionally. Apologies for the wall of text that is about to hit you but I want to put in as much detail as possible. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2014 - 55 answers

Don't know what to believe any more about my BF and incriminating emails

I am going through a major dilemma right now. I am not sure if I can continue with my relationship with my boyfriend, due to a very incriminating set of emails I saw in his inbox. My question is, do you think this is something to break up over? Or can I believe his story and give him the benefit of the doubt? See more details inside. [more inside]
posted by koolaidnovel on Dec 12, 2014 - 49 answers

Does my obsessive worrying mean I was wrong to break up?

I am a 23 year old woman who recently broke up with my first serious girlfriend (32 yr old) whom I dated for 18 months. I cannot stop obsessing that it was the wrong decision even though there were many reasons why we wouldn't have worked. Is this normal or a sign I'm making a mistake? [more inside]
posted by gatsbyisgreat on Dec 10, 2014 - 30 answers

Scrooging, or Too Generous?

How have you worked within a relationship with both have very different views (extreme?) on gift giving/receiving (to other people, not to each other)? In what ways have you managed your potentially irrational feelings regarding something you feel conflicted about? [more inside]
posted by sandmanwv on Dec 9, 2014 - 16 answers

Transitioning to a Long Distance Relationship with limited connectivity?

ProfMiasma, my partner for over two years (cohabitating for 9+ months), is going off to do fieldwork in West Africa for the next 1.5 years. For the first 6 months, she'll be "in the bush" with limited access to communication technology. Given this limited connectivity situation, what practices and tools can we use to make the best of our long-distance relationship situation? (More Details Inside) [more inside]
posted by miasma on Dec 7, 2014 - 15 answers

Should I try to heal the rift within my friendship group or not?

I had a short lived fling with a guy in my group of friends and it has caused a division. Should I try to remedy this situation? [more inside]
posted by Kat_Dubs on Dec 6, 2014 - 15 answers

Please help me decide if I should move back to NYC from SF

Can't decide if I should move back to NYC from SF. Please help me find some new ways to think about the problem. [more inside]
posted by apostate street preacher on Dec 4, 2014 - 27 answers

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