1847 posts tagged with relationship.
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Is he cheating or just really friendly?

A history of near-cheating incidents have me questioning some over-the-top comments my husband has made to some women. Can you help me tell if I am over-reacting and figure out how to proceed? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 1, 2016 - 31 answers

Should I try to "grow" feelings for this person or listen to my anxiety?

I have been dating this guy for just over a month now. I knew him previously from HS, but we reconnected through a dating site. I had a huge crush on him in HS but I wasn't sure how I'd feel as that was a long time ago (25 now). Before we met I was honest and said I wanted friendship to start off with, cause I assumed he'd expect a hook up right away. We've hung out five times now, and been texting a lot but I'm not sure how I feel still. [more inside]
posted by oracleia on Nov 29, 2016 - 16 answers

Successful FWB practices?

I've never had a successful FWB, although I would like to. Dunno if it matters but I am a cis female involved with a cis male looking for tips from folks who have had/are having successful longish FWB relationships. What's working for you? What pitfalls to avoid? [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna on Nov 27, 2016 - 9 answers

How do I break up?

I've come to the painful conclusion that I should break up with my girlfriend, soon to be fiancé. Please help me work through these emotions and the logistics of such. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 26, 2016 - 49 answers

Do I say something or do I let him go?

My friend with benefits seems to run hot and cold on me, and I don't know if there's a better way for me to communicate with him, or if I should just accept that he's not that into me anymore and let our "friendship" fade away. How do you tell someone who may or may not owe you any emotional support that their behavior is hurting you? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2016 - 19 answers

Question about anxiety surrounding moving in together?

My girlfriend and I are planning to move in together over the next couple months. This has been a little while in the making. Please help me resolve my anxiety surrounding it. [more inside]
posted by seagull.apollo on Nov 23, 2016 - 25 answers

His ex wants to move in with him. Their bond is emotional but not sexual

My current bf had a codependent relationship with his ex, and she helped him through difficult times. Now she is losing her job and wants to move in with him, and he feels responsible for her happiness. Where does this leave me? [more inside]
posted by muppets on Nov 21, 2016 - 45 answers

Help me remember the name of this break up related country love song

I heard it on country radio some time between 2008 and 2011, I think it was on a lot back then. It's sung by a man in first person, about reluctantly going on a date despite still being depressed about a past breakup, and having his world brought back to life by the new woman during the course of the evening. [more inside]
posted by BeaverTerror on Nov 18, 2016 - 5 answers

Letting go of a failed relationship...while we work together?

Gay filter: I am a 23 year old gay male. I started a relationship with a man of the same age that I work with. The relationship started fast and ended even faster. I went back to him after he hurt me, but soon decided enough is enough. Now I can't stand the pain when I see him in work, and I am still lingering over feelings of attachment to him...even though he hurt me! What should I do? [more inside]
posted by Lewnatic on Nov 15, 2016 - 10 answers

How to bounce back as a couple after conflict

Everyone disagrees. We have conflicts that stretch out too much, and both wait on the other to establish a firm baseline of safety afterward. This results in our repair efforts getting thwarted it the reopening of wounds when we need to create positive forward movement. Please help. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato on Nov 11, 2016 - 11 answers

Relationship bridge with older siblings

I've always felt like the odd (wo)man out when it comes to my siblings. Past attempts to address this have not gone over well. We're all regionally co-located again and I'm upset by missing out on another meet up that I would have gleefully attended if invited. What can I do to change this situation? [more inside]
posted by toomanycurls on Nov 6, 2016 - 19 answers

Why am I so desperate for love?

[Gayfilter] I am a 23-year-old gay man who has never had a serious relationship, not through lack of trying. When potential relationships come to an end, I get severely depressed and can't handle the rejection. I have tried therapy, medication, self-medication, hobbies, you name it, but I cannot shake this unbearable heartache that plagues me every time a guy I like calls time on our fleeting romance. [more inside]
posted by Lewnatic on Nov 5, 2016 - 16 answers

Pre-empting possessiveness

My partner of over 10 years and I split up on very good terms about a year and a half ago. We had a very platonic relationship almost all through, just a deep friendship really, so it's easy to continue to have a friendship with absolutely no attraction or complicated emotions. He has a sweet new girlfriend now, I am spending time with them for the first time this weekend, and I'm looking for tips on adjusting to the new reality gracefully, making her very comfortable, and dealing with emotions of possessiveness that might come up for me. [more inside]
posted by miaow on Oct 25, 2016 - 16 answers

I don't want to rip off the band-aid... Without your input

I think breaking up is probably a good decision, but I think this is something we should discuss. But I'm not sure how to have this conversation. [more inside]
posted by Urban Winter on Oct 20, 2016 - 12 answers

I feel conflicted about asking a girl out.

I feel conflicted about asking a girl (A) out. I've been trying to get over a crush over another girl (B) for a month now. B was everything I've wanted, but it didn't work out. I don't want to hurt A by asking her out and nothing happening in the long run. [more inside]
posted by Thisisbuffalo on Oct 14, 2016 - 10 answers

Ever seen red flags that weren't actually red flags?

A dating question about potential red flags. Am I misjudging this person? [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna on Oct 11, 2016 - 45 answers

Should I not say anything?

I met a great man about a year or so ago right after getting out of an abusive relationship. I left after a few weeks to figure myself out. I never told him about the nature of the relationship I left, just that I needed time and could I get back in touch when I was in a better place but that I didnt know how long that would be. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 10, 2016 - 15 answers

If you wanna be somebody else, change your mind?

How do I cope with a change in my mindset about my relationship? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 6, 2016 - 16 answers

How do you navigate interfaith practices as a couple?

How do happily married interfaith couples (or those with one religious and one non-religious partner) make it work? What do your daily routines look like? And how do you maintain intimacy and avoid conflict around differing religious practices and beliefs? Looking for stories, anecdotes, books, articles, or other information about how interfaith couples navigate difference. [more inside]
posted by carrioncomfort on Oct 5, 2016 - 9 answers

Did you ever have to choose between your relationship and a career?

I recently graduated from the university and I'm currently looking for a job, but the career opportunities in my field are limited in the town where my boyfriend and I live now. How do I choose between staying with my boyfriend (and possibly regretting not moving to a bigger town where job offers are much better), or moving away and losing him? (F, 25) [more inside]
posted by U.N.Owen on Oct 5, 2016 - 66 answers

Floating in relationship limbo

Do we try to take a break, even though we live together? We get along so well as friends, and spend time together, but he's basically stopped being affectionate and said he's not sure if he loves me romantically anymore? How do we move forward? [more inside]
posted by LonelyOnes on Oct 3, 2016 - 9 answers

¿Yo me enfrío o lo sufro?

I'm in a wonderful, loving relationship but I can't seem to stop feeling pessimistic about what our future together would look like. I'm not sure whether to stay or go and need help thinking through how to go about doing either. [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina on Sep 24, 2016 - 17 answers

Should I give in on spending money on an expensive luxury?

My wife wants to buy an expensive artwork for the house. While I also find it beautiful, I don't think it's a good idea, financially. We're at loggerheads. Help me think this through. [more inside]
posted by snarfois on Sep 23, 2016 - 91 answers

Another grieving process question

Another grieving process question: Since my dad died, I've had difficulty getting along with my mother. What's going on, and how do I make sure our relationship does not become permanently weakened? [more inside]
posted by Ziggy500 on Sep 22, 2016 - 6 answers

Is it silly to wait around for love?

You see it in the movies, two lovers split but somehow run into each other and fall in love again and are able to be together. It seems silly, but I've fallen in love and I'm not sure if it's a stupid idea to wait around for something like the movies. [more inside]
posted by buttonedup on Sep 20, 2016 - 27 answers

He loves me, but he can't open up

My partner of 2.5 years can’t talk to me about the most significant relationship of his life. I want to understand this better. [more inside]
posted by yawper on Sep 16, 2016 - 31 answers

New Careerfilter: You used to work with your SO and now you don't

I'm excited for a possible career change over the next few years. I currently work with my SO. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by 3491again on Sep 15, 2016 - 8 answers

Special pickle-themed anniversary

Remember the engagement BBQ? Well today is my and my husband's third anniversary! WOO! We joked that a third anniversary is probably the pickle anniversary and that they save all the expensive fancy stuff for the fives and tens of anniversaries. So now I want to do something special and pickle themed for him this weekend. I only have a couple days and limited means to pull this together, but in the green I trust... [more inside]
posted by PuppetMcSockerson on Sep 14, 2016 - 22 answers

How to be a good assistant coach for kids' sports

I am the assistant coach of my daughter's (8-yo) softball team. The head coach is knowledgeable about the sport, but in my opinion can be a bit too tough on the kids, several of whom have never played before. I can see the spirit being sapped in a number of the kids and I'd like to help turn that around without undermining the head coach's authority. Is it possible to help some of these girls actually enjoy their season, or am SOL if I'm just the assistant? [more inside]
posted by GorgeousPorridge on Sep 12, 2016 - 9 answers

How to know when you're truly in love?

How do you know you're in love (and willing to spend your life with someone) versus just loving someone? [more inside]
posted by Sparwasser on Aug 31, 2016 - 77 answers

To meet or not to meet? (Broken relationship edition)

I have a very ugly, troubled relationship history with "Carol." Recently she quite unexpectedly asked to meet for lunch. I do not know what to do. [more inside]
posted by I_Love_Bananas on Aug 22, 2016 - 60 answers

Getting your hair dry *and* being a good girlfriend?

This might seem like a stupid question, but how do people who have hair that requires blowdrying and have to wake up before their partners manage that? Hair care product and/or relationship tips both welcome! [more inside]
posted by blerghamot on Aug 22, 2016 - 59 answers

Worried over a disparity of feelings or worried over nothing?

Last week I decided to enter a Long Distance Relationship with a person I’ve never met in person. I like him and he likes me… but I also feel he may like me too much for a person he’s never met? Or perhaps I’m misreading him or overthinking, which I am prone to do. How do I handle this? Details within. [more inside]
posted by AdriftInSpace on Aug 20, 2016 - 32 answers

Getting rid of toxic roommate when "GTFO" isn't as easy as it sounds?

TL;DR: How do you get rid of a toxic roommate when they literally have nowhere to go, no one else willing to take them in, and no money to find a place of their own? IF it gets ugly, violent, I'll call my friend who lives in the complex and get help with immediate removal... but I don't want to make this guy homeless unless he becomes a real threat. I'm trying to think of clear ways to communicate boundaries and deadlines, such as giving X amount of time to save up deposits for a place of his own now that he has a job again. That's the kind of advice I need please. [more inside]
posted by myShanon on Aug 17, 2016 - 69 answers

I'm here to stay!

In a serious relationship. Want to do something that symbolizes our commitment to each other. Ideas? [more inside]
posted by yawper on Aug 9, 2016 - 15 answers

A big life puzzle - please help me solve it

I know you should usually just know if you should live with your partner, but I think I know, and the context has been really complicated and dramatic so hear me out! Featuring cancer x 2, a car crash, and 267 types of ear plugs. [more inside]
posted by starstarstar on Aug 8, 2016 - 13 answers

Trapped in my relationship, but its proving very difficult to end

I am in a tight spot. I know the relationship must end and have been honest about that with her, but I’m having a hard time figuring out practically what to do after this, as her reaction to my attempts to break up have been volatile. Ultimately I would like us to split and to live together long enough for her to find somewhere else to live, but from her behaviour so far, I am concerned that she is not stable enough to carry through with that plan. But I am desperate to avoid the alternatives - either escalating things to the point her family or even police are involved, which would obviously traumatise her, or with me just leaving the house with no future contact, which I feel could lead to serious depression as she has deep fears of abandonment. The latter option is also difficult as it is my parent’s home. What’s most frustrating is that, depending on her mood, she herself can see that we are not suited and need to move on. What do I do? [more inside]
posted by Troubled Man on Aug 4, 2016 - 25 answers

help me navigate my feelings & needs in an LDR

My boyfriend left less than a week ago, and I've been heartbroken ever since. Is this normal? This is my first serious relationship (I'm 25, he's 28). When we're together things are blissful and perfect. He has affirmed his commitment to me in many ways, but I feel our communication needs may be different. I am trying to understand the root of my unhappiness, as I felt so hopeful when we were together in person. I am also trying to understand whether I am cut out for an LDR in this capacity. Please help. [more inside]
posted by DayTripper on Aug 3, 2016 - 9 answers

LA Therapist Recommendation

Asking on behalf of a friend. She is looking for an East-of-downtown LA therapist, preferably a woman. My friend is specifically interested in developing stronger relationships skills and working through past relationship trauma, and would also like a therapist who understands the issues surrounding women of color.
posted by nanook on Jul 30, 2016 - 1 answer

Me vs. My husband's family

I just had a big blow up with my husband's "mother" and while he's taken my side, the more I think about it, the more it seems his story doesn't hold up, and I feel he kind of provoked the argument, but maybe not on purpose. Looking back, this seems to be a pattern. [more inside]
posted by serenity_now on Jul 30, 2016 - 55 answers

Should I go on a trip with my relatively new partner?

I've been dating a person for three months. We booked a short trip but since the booking I learned things about how he processes conflict that concern me. We've had a good conversation since then. I'm not worried for my safety, but is this trip still a good idea? [more inside]
posted by ramenopres on Jul 29, 2016 - 44 answers

A man, a girlfriend, and an ex (or two): now what?

My boyfriend is driving six hours to spend the night at an ex's place. I don't know what to do from here. More inside. [more inside]
posted by Amy93 on Jul 28, 2016 - 84 answers

I am having a genuinely difficult time getting over a breakup...

How do I move on from this breakup, considering it was such a short time? [more inside]
posted by ladykitty5 on Jul 26, 2016 - 22 answers

Staying-over etiquette in new relationship?

Specifically, where there's an imbalance between living situations - where one lives alone and has all the mod-cons, the other's in a studenty hovel crawling with housemates. [more inside]
posted by youhavedeadedme on Jul 26, 2016 - 30 answers

How to reverse relationship with work colleague

I just moved to a new team who I've worked with in the past but not a ton. I've gotten off to a rocky start with one of the people on the team and it's all on me. How do I make her make want to continue working with me? [more inside]
posted by sandmanwv on Jul 8, 2016 - 21 answers

How can I maintain a social life balance when all I want is my SO?

One of the reasons my last long-term relationship failed was because we didn't have any/many friends outside of each other. I want to avoid that in my current relationship, but unlike my last one, my current boyfriend and I love doing all the same things together so it's hard to reconcile doing things separately with friends that we'd prefer to do with each other. [more inside]
posted by majesty_snowbird on Jul 7, 2016 - 28 answers

how do couples argue successfully?

I've read that successful couples argue. How can I do this in productive way with my partner? [more inside]
posted by diode on Jul 2, 2016 - 19 answers

How to get results from unemployed spouse?

His unemployment benefits just ran out, and he likes to use the coping skill of avoidance. He clams up for conversations about money or what he is planning to do. I'm pregnant and cannot support both of us and a child without overextending myself. I want to be supportive, because historically I have lost my cool around these issues. But I also don't want to be so supportive that he isn't motivated to do everything possible to fix things. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato on Jul 2, 2016 - 93 answers

Do I squash the seed of leaving or just let it grow?

I've been thinking a lot about my relationship. Maybe it was a mistake asking a question before, but now I can't stop thinking and debating, feeling guilty and exhausted about my relationship. Please advise for hopefully the last time I bring this up. The snowflakes are falling inside and it's a long post, sorry. [more inside]
posted by socky bottoms on Jun 30, 2016 - 35 answers

Living with an alcoholic boyfriend

I am in a pickle. My boyfriend is an alcoholic (probably the functioning kind- whatever that is,) and we live together. We have been together for almost two years. I can't stand the drinking anymore, and I have tried nearly every avenue to remedy it within the relationship. The only thing I can think to do now, is move out so that I can distance myself from his alcoholism. [more inside]
posted by Wizzow on Jun 30, 2016 - 66 answers

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