116 posts tagged with queer.
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Fear of loneliness *and* fear of dating

I'm terrified of loneliness and terrified of dating. Needless to say, I'm wound up most of the time. What can I do about this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 19, 2015 - 7 answers

Try A Little Tenderness

How can I feel more comfortable around men, and find men who are gentle and solid and who I might like to date (as a queer/bi trans woman)? [more inside]
posted by elephantsvanish on Nov 14, 2015 - 10 answers

Things to do in Denver

My partner and I are visiting Denver next week! Can you offer recommendations for places we should visit or advice on things we should look out for while we're in town, keeping in mind we are evaluating it as a potential place to live? (Bonus if you have queer culture recommendations!) [more inside]
posted by treefort on Oct 19, 2015 - 5 answers

Planner Inspiration for Weirdos

Where can I find inspiration for planner decoration that is geared towards various alternative/weirdo types - e.g. queers, geeks, artists, activists, certain subcultures? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Oct 15, 2015 - 17 answers

Best fantasy books on Audible.com

Looking for beautifully written, beautifully performed fantasy audiobooks available on Audible.com. A skilled reader is key. If possible, I love when the book is less a reading and more a performance, like the exquisite Listening Library performance of The Golden Compass. But I will settle for a great narrator. The delightful British narrator of Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell, skilled in multiple accents, is my favorite so far. [more inside]
posted by lieber hair on Sep 25, 2015 - 16 answers

Don't be a stranger

Recently I've gone on several dates where we got along really well online and talked for hours in person. However, they ended with a hug and silence afterward, which I'm disappointed about. How can I figure out if we both want to go past one-shot platonic meetings, and how do we get to where we want to go? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 4, 2015 - 14 answers

Driving from DC to Wilmington: Queer family filter

My little queer family is driving down to the Wilmington, NC area from the DC area and we are looking for tips for places to stop every few hours (small kids) that are also "safe" for a very visibly queer family. [more inside]
posted by anya32 on Jul 30, 2015 - 5 answers

What is this book about girls in love, aliens, and immortality pills?

Asking for a friend: Any leads on what this book might be? "Two girls become friends. Girl #1 realizes she's gay and gets a girlfriend, through which girl #2 realizes she's in love with girl #1. They lose touch until years later, when they are both grown. One plays the flute and rides horses, one is a famous sculptor. They fall in love and start living together. At some point, aliens are introduced and give folks on earth pills that allow them to achieve immortality for as long as they are taken."
posted by c'mon sea legs on Jul 24, 2015 - 2 answers

Where can I create a custom planner / calendar that's POD?

I had the idea that I'd like to create a custom calendar, titled "The Queer Agenda," with holidays and events of note relating to queer history. I would like to do so in a Print on Demand shop where people who like the concept can buy it in variations of school planner and wall calendar. Zazzle and Cafe Press will let me choose pictures and title text, but not day-to-day text, and they also only do wall calendars. This will not work. Many companies like Modern Postcard, Vistaprint, and Snapfish will let me customize days, but they do not offer print on demand designer storefronts. Any recommendations for services that might work better or ideas for how to proceed?
posted by Alex Haist on Jun 22, 2015 - 5 answers

Resources for a teacher to handle bullying in her class.

An acquaintance of mine needs resources to help one of her students who is being bullied for being (apparently) LGBTQ. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by Promethea on Jun 15, 2015 - 5 answers

booking sex-related work as a woman

How does one navigate sex work or sexological bodywork as a female client in the United States? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 3, 2015 - 3 answers

Gender Presentation in Africa

I am a 31yo queer woman who is considered fairly masculine presenting in my daily life (I am frequently addressed as "sir" by waiters, customer service people, etc, and many never realize their mistake). I'm headed to Cameroon for the first time for a business/research trip and I want to be received well, which I unfortunately suspect means changing my gender presentation. I would love tips and tricks, and support, particularly for people who have been to West Africa before. [more inside]
posted by zug on May 3, 2015 - 21 answers

I need a haircut that says "I'm queer!" in Asheville

My hair's grown out a bit over the last two months, but I haven't been in one place long enough to get a cut. But now I'm in Asheville! For a week! So now I just need to a) find a place to get my hair cut, and b) what sort of hair would look right, given all my snowflake tendencies? [more inside]
posted by you could feel the sky on Apr 23, 2015 - 6 answers

Advice for starting a GSA

Are you or were you part of a GSA or other LGBTQ organization in school? I'm a teacher starting a Gay-Straight Alliance at my public high school with the support of the administration. [more inside]
posted by smorgasbord on Jan 21, 2015 - 10 answers

flannel eye for the tiny, squishy guy

I would like some basic, dude-styled flannel button up shirts. I'm a short, small-framed queer person who stores weight in my chest. "Men's" flannels are generally too large; "women's" often have girly details like darts and little wee pockets and dainty buttons; "boy's" would be perfect but the sleeves are invariably too short. Do you have a body like mine and a basic flannel you love? Where did you buy it? [more inside]
posted by Juliet Banana on Jan 9, 2015 - 26 answers

Feminist, anti-racist, queer ally featuring YA books for tween girls.

How can I expand the social consciousness of my book loving nieces? [more inside]
posted by Captain Chesapeake on Dec 30, 2014 - 22 answers

Sites that are similar to Fleshbot circa 2007 (NSFWish)

Ye olde Fleshbot was really cool because it was well curated and included all types of sexy media including videos, links, industry news, pop culture, reviews. It even had options for both queer and straight focused content. The last few years I've found that it's really gone downhill and gotten pretty mainstream and generic. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2014 - 3 answers

Sources for quality lesbian erotica

Where is all the lesbian/queer erotica that doesn't suck? (NSFW, naturally) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 23, 2014 - 6 answers

If you do not arrive before 10pm, you will not party – Boston edition

A group of us will be in town the first weekend in December. Going out in unfamiliar cities is tricky. Where do all the cool queer kids party the first weekend of the month? And by kids I mean 25-45 year olds, 90s hip hop / top 40 /songs with lyrics you probably know loving types, possibly but not necessarily hipsters who hate lining up and don’t love paying cover. Looking for a fun, unpretentious bar to drink and dance, with an approachable crowd. [more inside]
posted by walkinginsunshine on Nov 4, 2014 - 3 answers

What percentage of trans individuals are gay/queer?

I am interested in learning to what extent individuals who identify as transexual also identify as queer or homosexual. Have there been any good studies of this? I googled but could not find much - please link me to any studies/findings about the issue.
posted by Another Fine Product From The Nonsense Factory on Oct 31, 2014 - 7 answers

Seattle in 48 hours!

I'll be in Seattle for 48 hours (Sunday afternoon through Tuesday afternoon) for a brief leg of a solo trip. Help me structure my time there for maximum wandery enjoyable urban exploration, with perhaps a little bit of hiking thrown in? [more inside]
posted by elephantsvanish on Oct 16, 2014 - 11 answers

Is it possible to find dates if you're a person seeking a person?

I am potentially interested in dating again. I had a breakup of a 1.5 year relationship around this time last year and feel emotionally over it. However, I feel like I will have a bit more challenges in regards to dating than the average person. (I'm mostly asexual, not very feminine, and a non-traditional undergraduate student in a college town). Special snowflakes inside... [more inside]
posted by sevenofspades on Oct 11, 2014 - 16 answers

Where do I meet Older Lesbians in NYC who are into Younger Women?

Hi there! Where can I meet Older Lesbians in NYC who are into Younger Women? I've been scouring the internet, MeetUp, etc, but there has to be an event for this, right? NYC is supposed to have everything ;) Cheers, G
posted by Kombucha3452 on Sep 30, 2014 - 6 answers

Gay Tax

I hit the holy grail and have a new position with full benefits, including full coverage for domestic partners. I have a partner who lives with me, but we are still fairly newish and are not ready to get married. I have to enroll us in the benefits very soon, like now. The problem is, the queer tax (I guess now the Not-Legally-Married tax) on my partner's benefits. [more inside]
posted by latkes on Jun 12, 2014 - 14 answers

Queer sci-fi

Where are some good places to read queer sci fi short stories? [more inside]
posted by tinkletown on May 22, 2014 - 23 answers

Blog-Magazines For Cool Colorful Punk Babes

Lately I've been really into the blog Ribbon Around A Bomb, who writes about female-fronted 70s post-punk, Twin Peaks, feminist art, and leather jackets. I also love The Pulp Zine, which is full of teen dreams and high school small town angst, an obsession with Burger Records, 90s nostalgia, black lipstick and pink hair. I'm looking for more blogs that cover punk, garage rock, femme fun, DIY, weirdo fashion, nostalgia, queerness, creativity, feminism, art, and worship of countercultural idols. Basically, I'm a fully-grown scummy punk boyfemme who wants the experience of flipping through a teen magazine tailored to my interests. What other sites would I love? [more inside]
posted by Juliet Banana on Apr 16, 2014 - 3 answers

How to tactfully explain to people that I’m not straight?

I got married last year (!). My husband and I are both queer, and both have a history of same-sex relationships before we met one another. This hasn't caused any problems in our own relationship, but it’s causing some unexpected confusion at our LGBT-friendly church. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 12, 2014 - 34 answers

Feels like I'm 15 again

I'm in my early thirties, bisexual/queer and just ended a decade-long relationship with a cisgendered man. I'm starting to date women but haven't had sex with a woman in a decade and didn't have a lot of experience even then. I have always been a visible part of the LGBT community and most people assume I'm a lesbian, which makes people think I have more sexual experience with women than I do. I'm basically nervous about not knowing what to do anymore and being bad in bed. Questions are as follows: Should I disclose this lack of recent experience to the women I'm starting to casually date and have sex with? How can I stop being so nervous, which I know won't help? And: what does real-life lesbian safer sex look like when you're an adult and not a 23 year old with no sense of risk?
posted by anonymous on Apr 2, 2014 - 8 answers

Where have all the movie plots gone?

Where are all the films which have queer characters whose sexuality is not the main point of the film? Action movies with lesbian heroes; courtroom dramas with transgender lawyers; road trip movies with gay buddies out for more than getting laid; science fiction/spooky stuff films with androgynous/intersex protagonists, I'm not fussed. Preferably ones where no one dies as a "punishment" for being queer. [more inside]
posted by Athanassiel on Mar 16, 2014 - 38 answers

Am I in danger?

Total snowstorm inside, in short my roommate for the next month has very, very different worldviews from me, does things I find offensive and might have access to a gun. He does not know that I am transgendered. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 10, 2014 - 65 answers

Thoughtful trans/queer/identity politics blogs

I'm looking for thoughtful, thought-provoking blogs (and books, I guess) covering topics like queer theory, trans/gender theory, identity politics, and maybe related activism. Transmasculine/masculine of center/FTM topics especially welcome. Extreme academic jargon is not a turn-off. A few additional notes inside. [more inside]
posted by dorque on Feb 19, 2014 - 3 answers

Away We Go - Grandparents Included!

My partner and I are pregnant and looking for a place to make our permanent home. The sitch? My parents are coming with us. And while we think it's pretty awesome of them, it's making location hunting that much more complicated. [more inside]
posted by givennamesurname on Feb 15, 2014 - 19 answers

Queer-friendly haircut in the Twin Cities?

Looking for a place or a particular stylist who will cut my queer hair and who may even offer suggestions about style. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by Frowner on Nov 5, 2013 - 15 answers

Songs about the early years of HIV/AIDS

What are some songs about the early years of HIV/AIDS in the US and the politics surrounding it? Think musical equivalent of something like Angels in America. [more inside]
posted by ActionPopulated on Oct 17, 2013 - 34 answers

It gets better. It really does, right?

A friend's 13 yo son has been having serious mental and behavioral problems and they haven't fully figured out why. They discovered by accident (shared electronics) that he is now identifying as bi and has expressed romantic interest in another guy his age. I'm also queer but I'm not a parent (and I grew up before the internet gave me access to Dan Savage, in a very different cultural climate). I totally know how hard it is to be a GLBTQ teenager and want to help them alleviate as much of the sexual identity stress on him as possible/appropriate. What do you feel are the best resources or advice for a parent of a gay teenager with mental health issues? [more inside]
posted by sweltering on Oct 3, 2013 - 11 answers

How to get Emory to Rescind Award to Anti-gay Activist?

Emory University is planning to give a distinguished alumni award to H. Eddie Fox, who has been leading the fight against the inclusion and equality of gay Methodists in the Methodist Church (among other accomplishments). Students/staff/faculty are currently mobilizing to have that award rescinded. We have less than a week left. What is the most effective way to pressure Emory to rescind that award? [more inside]
posted by andoatnp on Sep 22, 2013 - 6 answers

Rules for hosting Olympics public-viewing events in local bars?

When the Olympics come around, often bars will host viewing events. Are there official rules for how to make this happen? Can any bar with a TV host network viewing or stream from online? Can the bar or organizer publicize it as an Olympics viewing event? Can the organizers broadcast the games and overlay their own commentary? [more inside]
posted by fallacy of the beard on Sep 1, 2013 - 5 answers

Transmasculine / Masculine-of-Center Fashion Blogs

I'm a queer girl who sometimes likes to dress like a boy. I would like suggestions for fashion blogs that focus on genderqueer/butch/trans fashion. I'm especially looking for style aesthetics other than the very popular "dapper" look. [more inside]
posted by Juliet Banana on Aug 23, 2013 - 6 answers

Mexico City recommendations: cool 'hood, what to do, etc

I'm going to Mexico City in late October and have a bunch of questions! [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Aug 22, 2013 - 1 answer

Fun ideas for a workshop on emotions?

Help me design a workshop about emotions, self-awareness, and coping strategies for 50 queer youth! [more inside]
posted by whalebreath on Aug 6, 2013 - 12 answers

LGBTQ+ activism/volunteering while studying abroad in Barcelona?

I'm studying abroad this fall in Barcelona with pretty workable Spanish but very limited Catalan, and I'd love to do some work/activism/volunteering/organizing around queer or related issues (HIV/AIDS, youth development, homelessness, etc.) while I'm there. Is this possible given my language limitations? [more inside]
posted by kylej on Jul 29, 2013 - 4 answers

Should people work to end sister city relationships with Russia?

What is the value in pushing non-Russian cities to drop their sister/twin relationships with Russian cities to protest the anti-gay laws and attitudes in Russia? This article from Radio Free Europe offers a summery of the issue, "Sister Cities Ramp Up Russia Boycott Over Antigay Law". [more inside]
posted by andoatnp on Jul 25, 2013 - 14 answers

Reading recommendations on queer families

I want to read more about alternative family structures in queer communities, particularly trans* communities, particularly communities of and for queer transpeople of color. What can you recommend? [more inside]
posted by liketitanic on Jun 29, 2013 - 4 answers

Best charity for LGBT rights

What is the best charity to give to in support of LGBT rights and activism? I'm in New Mexico but am open to donating to a national organization. [more inside]
posted by NoraReed on Jun 2, 2013 - 11 answers

Supporting my girlfriend through medical transition

My girlfriend is about to start a series of medical-related procedures as part of her gender transition (M2F). What can I, as a cis(ish) woman, do to be a good support to her? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Apr 10, 2013 - 4 answers

Playing my part in making life for fellow LGBT countryfolk bearable.

The State-sanctioned homophobia and transphobia in Malaysia, my country of origin, is breaking my heart. What can I do as a currently overseas citizen to make things better for my fellow LGBT folk back in Malaysia, particularly in raising awareness of the issue internationally? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Mar 5, 2013 - 5 answers

Where therapy and parties collide, aka what happened to my social tact?

I ran into someone at a party that I'd previously met briefly in a clinical setting (in a position of authority), but I lacked the social tact to refrain from mentioning this. Is there anything I could have done to right the situation? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 20, 2013 - 23 answers

Interesting scifi / glam rock makeup looks?

Can you point me to some (non-prosthetic) scifi/fantasy makeup looks? [more inside]
posted by lemoncakeisalie on Jan 1, 2013 - 10 answers

Unobtanium suddenly becomes obtainable; drat! complications!

I have two romantic interests in my life: one who adores me and is giving herself to me wholeheartedly, and one who seems to be a better match but lives 850 miles away and is just getting out of a relationship. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by sockpuppetryarts on Oct 14, 2012 - 34 answers

At least it's a polite, supportive boys' club...

How do aspiring stand-up comedians who aren't straight white men find success at open mics? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 8, 2012 - 25 answers

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