I am looking for a book that will help me work through issues with intimacy and being emotionally distant, anxiety surrounding myself and my life, self esteem issues, getting in touch with my emotions, and just dealing with a lot of latent frustration. Overall, a book on tools to develop emotional maturity is what I need. If anyone knows of a workbook with exercises that would be best since they tend to keep my attention, but if not a regular self help book would be awesome. [more inside]
I let the losses of loved ones, which I have experienced quite a lot over the years, define who I am and how I behave. I'm in therapy and working on it, but I'm looking for advice from people who fear losing others on how to deal with that ever-present shadow. [more inside]
I'm looking for books, preferably audio books, about setting boundaries with people and learning when to say no/yes. I want something grounded in psychology, without any religious undertones (although I am open to wisdom from any religion as long as it doesn't get preachy).
I used to think it was OK to fantasize about other women as long as I wasn't emotionally or physically cheating. Fiancee did not, and we would both like me to be start being mentally faithful as well. What are your best tips for keeping thoughts of other women out of my mind? Details inside. [more inside]
I used to like people, but now I don't. I fear I'm creating an irreversibly solitary life for myself. I think the problem must be me, but I'm not sure what the cure is. Looking for advice. [more inside]
I haven't been feeling so confident lately. I know my SO could also be much happier if she felt a bit more confident. When we first met around 3 years ago, we were both extremely confident. Now we seem to have trouble being decisive, making decisions to better ourselves/get necessary things done, and choosing a restaurant or a date idea gets harder and harder. I would love ideas of things that could help with this. [more inside]
I'd like to learn a little bit more about what couples counselors, therapists, and psychologists have written about the stages that long-term relationships go through, what the issues and concerns are in the different stages, and what approaches are helpful in keeping the relationship strong at different stages. The articles I've been able to find on the web are pretty shallow, and seem to assume that the purpose of marriage is to have kids. I'd like to find something that is more appropriate to a couple who got married at 40+ so have already attained (presumably) a certain degree of wisdom, and for whom kids are not in the picture or in the cards. Authors that I have found helpful and intelligent in the past have been Gottman, Sue Johnson (Hold Me Tight), and the author of perennial AskMe favorite The Five Love Languages. I'm specifically interested in the 5-10 year stage, but welcome broader surveys as well.
Write the numbers 1 to 20 on a set of cards, one per card but two cards of each number, put them on the foreheads of a group of twenty men and twenty women, and give them a couple minutes to try to pair up with the person of the opposite sex with the highest-ranked card: they will always end up with someone close to their own rank. Who originally thought of this? [more inside]
Got a message out of the blue on a social network the other day from an ex; mentioned it to my partner (we're both big believers in transparency when it comes to random messages from exes) and we're each taking a different read from the message, so we figured we'd turn to the hivemind for input. [more inside]
I may be starting adult attachment therapy in the next week, on the advice of a crisis counselor and after a few years of on-and-off treatment for anxiety and depression that's not getting me very far. Point me to some quality, hopefully easy to find resources that can spell out what the experience might be like. [more inside]
Tell me about situations where you've reluctantly cut off contact with a close friend, family member, or confidant -- especially those in which the relationship was good to you but you felt that letting go was the best move for *their* sake. [more inside]
My boyfriend seems to have a kind of blindness around other people's feelings and motivations. I don't think he has Aspergers -- more like ADD and some narcissistic traits, perhaps. What might this be called, how can I gently help him with it, and how can he help himself? [more inside]
A few months ago, I had a complete physical and emotional breakdown and actually went temporarily insane. I'm ok now. How do I begin to repair the relationships that suffered during this time? [more inside]
I am about to see a psychiatrist for the first time for some anxiety-related issues. I am...anxious about this. Naturally. What can I expect, and what should I look out for? [more inside]
[Psych filter] I'm a few months out of a relationship that wouldn't have happened if I'd been honest with myself from the start. However it led to me questioning more than just my motives... do I need to talk to a pro, or just rest, relax and not make such a big deal of life? Of course there's [more inside]
I’m a 28 y/o woman who has finally found someone that I admire, who loves me dearly, and isn't a huge pain in my ass --and I'm hoping to make this last! Please help me to not ruin this wonderful thing! [more inside]
What does it mean when I'm talking to people and they "miss the point?" [more inside]
I'm starting a pediatric rotation next week for nursing school, and I have pretty much no experience with children. Do you have any tips for a nurse dealing with kids of any age between 1 and 18? [more inside]
How do you tell the difference between someone who's an extrovert and someone who's romantically interested in you? [more inside]
Grad-school, med school, residency match, geography...help? [more inside]
I need help understanding how my hyper-smart geek husband's brain works. I want to give him the understanding he craves but am having a hard time inhabiting his plane. [more inside]
Lately, the concept of "friends" seems to have become incredibly diluted by the casual use of the term by Facebook, MySpace et al. But in "the real world" what do you consider to be important when you are making and becoming friends? Is it how long you've known someone? How frequently you meet up? What you have in common? Something more intangible? Also, I'd love recommendations of any books looking at the psychology of how people become friends.
How to overcome defenses and lose the emotional baggage? [more inside]
Why is it embarrassing not to have romantic interest reciprocated? [more inside]
Starting my grad school program next week (clinical psychology, PhD) and am joining a cohort of 7 others. Any suggestions on things to do (or not do) when meeting and getting to know people I'll have to work with for the next six years? I'd like to be friends with them, especially since we have all our classes together. But the chances of such a small group together so much so stressed without conflict seem doubtful to me. Other psych grad school advice is welcome too. Thanks!
Do opposites really attract? And if so, why? What is it about opposites, specifically personality types, that makes some relationships click? [more inside]
What am I doing wrong and why should 'I' change and need I even ought to, in the first place ? Some advice before I hit the big '30'.. [more inside]
I just started a new relationship.. It's phenomenal and we've both felt that we're in love. I care deeply for her, but I don't know how to tell her about the fact that I have Herpes. Does anyone have advice on how to break the news? [more inside]
When you say you have a high tolerance for pain, don't you really mean to say "I love to complain about how much I hurt"? Or: is this really a case of the more you say it the less you mean it? [more inside]
Note: I'm asking the following on behalf of a friend...
How do you confront your SO about trolling for sex on the internet? [more inside]
How do you confront your SO about trolling for sex on the internet? [more inside]
Do you play armchair pyschiatrist? How sure are you that you're right about people's inner lives? Do you act on your hunches? [More Inside.] [more inside]