Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with pornography and internet

How to talk to your kids about online porn?

amoeba — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:30:37 -0800

Have you discovered your child has seen online pornography? What did you do about it? I've asked a few friends about this and I've heard stories about 7 and 8-year-olds finding some pretty sexually explicit stuff on smartphones, iPads, YouTube and of course the computer. Have other parents encountered this? How do you talk to really young kids about what they've seen, or just ignore it? Say it's off-limits? What if they were searching for it? What if they accidentally stumbled on it? How have parents dealt with this?

Wanted: Reliable porn blocking software for Mac OS 10.3.9

zombiebunny — Sun, 04 Mar 2007 10:22:21 -0800

Looking for reliable porn-blocking software for Mac OS 10.3. Help! Lucky me, my boyfriend's just admitted to an internet porn addiction. He's decided that the only way to avoid slipping up, while trying not to look at various porn sites is to put a filter on our Mac. I am having a really difficult time locating one via Google. I tried If2k, but when I've gone in to test, I kid you not, I can access just about every site out there, regardless of whether or not I specifically list the URL in the "bad URL" panel. Please spare me the porn isn't bad, he should be allowed to look at it....He's determined that it's a problem (and has been for the past 2 years...) that he can't tackle alone, so I'm just trying to help. Thanks for ANY advice that might help us out.

I am trying to kick my internet porn habit, and need suggestions on how to resist my temptations.

ilikebike — Sat, 12 Aug 2006 02:46:00 -0800

I am trying to kick my internet porn habit, and need suggestions on how to resist my temptations. My significant other and I have decided it would be best for me to try and kick my online pornography habit. I was visiting these websites daily. It was affecting me at work, because I would be late for my shift because I was looking at porn, and I would stay up late and do things behind my girlfriend's back to hide it. For me, it's not the porn per se, but more of the rush of finding websites, getting backdoor passwords, scouring file sharing sites, etc. This has made my girlfriend very upset emotionally, and I don't think it's right for her to go through this anymore, so I'm trying to kick my habit (80gb already deleted).

I have decided to install a program on all the machines in my house that monitors and reports the internet usage, but does not do any filtering. This I believe allows me more freedom (I'm opposed to any blocking whatsoever) while still having accountabiity.

Now I'm not a religious man, and I'm not opposed to pornography in the least bit, but this is something that need to be removed from our relationship. I've had this "addiction" or habit for close to 14 years now.

It's been rough, I've lapsed 3 times in the past month, but we're sticking through it. I'm looking for any suggestions that anyone can give me to help us through this.

Thanks!

Porn question.

Shane — Fri, 04 Feb 2005 05:55:29 -0800

I have some honest questions about porn, inspired by the recent Suicide Girls brouhaha.

PLEASE: CIVIL DISCUSSION AND NO FLAMES! CAN WE DO THAT? WE CAN, RIGHT? Anyone can state their own opinion or knowledge without attacking someone else's contradictory opinion, eh? Thanks! *More inside.* First off, I understand why women objected to semi-nudes on the front page of MeFi. It had an unexpected initial shock value on a site that has many intelligent female members who obviously see tits on the front page as objectification and devaluation of women. I also understand that, to Matt, Suicide Girls is soft-core alternative-porn and much less offensive than mainstream porn close-ups of genitalia in action.

But let's stay COMPLETELY AWAY from the issue of whether SG is appropriate for MeFi or not. DON'T GO THERE.

My questions:

I noticed that some people admitted to liking porn, yet still said that Suicide Girls objectified women, presumably objectifying them for heterosexual men.

But doesn't 95% of porn objectify women for men? In most heterosexual porn the woman is an object to be used by the man for his penetrational pleasure. While the man nearly always receives a bit of fellatio before he goes on to vaginal and anal penetration (in close-up shots), the woman is rarely afforded even a small bit of oral pleasure or any apparent attendency to her needs and desires. She may as well be a rubber doll.

Even porn involving lesbians is almost always aimed at men and involves penetration with a dildo, allowing men to fantasize about penetrational sex without having to look at an actual man's penis. The tiny minority of porn involving lesbians is aimed at a lesbian audience.

So what do lesbians or bisexual females think of Suicide Girls? What kind of porn subject-matter do lesbians (who like porn) like?

Is it contradictory that some people admitted to liking (presumably mainstream, genital-oriented) porn, yet felt that Suicide Girls, which is soft-core photos of nude women, is objectification?

When is a sexually-tantalizing photo of a nude woman (or man) porn and objectification, and when is it soft-core tantalization or erotica?

Suicide Girls, in my opinion, features women with a certain amount of personality and individuality. I'm not a member, nor do I frequent the site, but in perusing it lately I find that when I look at a Suicide Girl I fantasize that she is intelligent, maybe artsy or creative, probably very self-assertive or aggressive ... to me these are the images they project. Is Suicide Girls less objectifying than the normal pictures of bleached blonde, silicon-bloated women in Playboy or on mechanics' calendars, in which the women have all the personality of a Barbie Doll and the only things to fantasize about are, frankly, tits and ass?

When is porn objectification and when is it erotica?

What do gay and bi women think of these subjects?

Do heterosexual women agree that the bulk of heterosexual porn is aimed at a male audience? What type of porn do heterosexual women (who like porn) like?

**Mathowie, if this gets out of hand or you feel it is inappropriate, please delete away. I won't be offended.**

Help me stop my internet porn habit.

Anonymous — Wed, 13 Oct 2004 14:47:25 -0800

Please post links, anecdotes, horror stories, etc. designed to scare me out of my internet porn habit, focusing on ethical, moral, and legal issues. I want to stop cold turkey and the only way out is through my liberal guilt.