Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with plans

Help solve a friendship dispute.

tenaciousmoon — Tue, 07 May 2013 19:20:34 -0800

2 friends attempt to get together once or twice a week and when they do its a really great, fun time. Both are quirky and odd and feel personal connections and common interests are a rare thing. But.... A is always late, often gets distracted with other plans when executing the original plan, abruptly changes plans or altogether forgets them. B likes to stick to plans and follow through reliably. B is often frustrated at A for what appears/presents as inconsideration, flakiness or straight up lying. A is often frustrated at B's inability to be flexible or understanding or appreciating of the 'thought' behind the plans whether or not they actually materialize. Friend A has untreated adhd (and doesn't want to discuss it) and and Friend B thinks this may be a contributing factor. Friend A and Friend B both secretly think the other is in the wrong while they try to compromise in order to continue the friendship of 4 years, but the many disagreements are wearing on them. Should A and B just not hang out anymore?

Need help living in the here and now.

Anonymous — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 15:04:47 -0800

I have a lot of exciting stuff coming up in the next few years of my life, but before I get there I have to somehow slog through the doldrums of my current life. Help me live in the present. The next few years look like they're going to be very exciting. My boyfriend and I are planning on getting formally engaged and then hitched. We live in different cities right now, but will be moving back to my hometown - a large city that I know and love. I still have a lot of friends there and am really looking forward to being nearby again. We are planning to buy a house. I will be looking for a new job there (one reason why this question is anonymous...) and that is scary, but this is overwhelmingly a good thing and I'm really excited.

The problem is, I have to live through the next year or so in my current town, at my current job, far away from my friends, and probably keeping mum about this whole getting-married-moving-away thing. I have a demanding job in my current town and have spent most of my time here really throwing myself into the work. I spend most of my not-work time alone, or on the phone/chat with my boyfriend and my friends in my hometown.

I know that my workplace deserves an employee that is 100% devoted to the job, and I am trying to be that person. Even if I leave tomorrow (or next year), I will do my job as if I'll be here forever. But it's hard to look too far into the future when I know I won't be here. I have a high-level leadership position in the community, so I won't just be quietly sneaking out the back door.

I feel hesitant making friends and meeting people in my current town, knowing that I will be leaving in the next 1-2 years. I'm kind of bored and lonely right now, but don't feel like putting the effort into meeting people if I'm just going to leave. Oh, it's not like I'm a hermit. I HAVE friends...they just live in my hometown. I go to visit often and I am in contact with some of them almost daily.

I want to do good in the community, but I don't want to get involved in projects that I will just have to leave. Instead, I find myself perusing community involvement in my hometown, daydreaming about doing this-or-that once I get there.

I feel like I'm doing myself and my current town a disservice by "living in the future". I'm struggling to focus on here-and-now instead of there-and-soon. How do I do this? Does anyone have any suggestions for being present while the super-exciting future looms just around the bend?

Your dream retirement, given these circumstances?

1066 — Sat, 09 Mar 2013 21:59:59 -0800

If you were single, 53 and healthy and with an adult child roaming the Earth, where would you retire and why? Only limiting factors are 200K US in a retirement account and a pension of 40K US (with a COLA increase of $1600 each year).

It's the small blue journal in my second desk drawer down

dawkins_7 — Sat, 05 Jan 2013 12:30:13 -0800

If you keep a diary or other secret papers, do you have a plan for what happens to it if something happens to you? For example, if you keep a journal or diary that you would rather your family not see, do you have a trusted friend in charge of getting it and destroying it in the event that something happens to you and you can't get to it?

I've seen some previous AskMe questions about what to do with old diaries but this would be a current diary that you need to keep going and need to keep the pages, for whatever reason. (Keeping it in a digital format is not an option for various reasons.)

I keep mine at work so that's good for keeping it away from prying eyes at home but I'm thinking about asking my boss or my best friend to come and clean out my office if something happened to me and make sure that particular journal gets destroyed.

I'm not interested in ways to encode the diary or change how I keep it since it's really working for me the way it is now.

I was just curious if any of you have any plans like this in place.

Help me stay sane while I try to plan lessons!

Peregrin5 — Tue, 01 Jan 2013 23:25:07 -0800

Teacher Filter: Increasing the efficiency of creating lesson plans I am a first year teacher. It probably goes without saying that I am stressed out. I try to actively deal with stress as it comes and not let it pile up.

I have been having mild to low success.

One of the areas of issue is in my lesson planning, more specifically coming up with activities and materials to best meet my learning objectives.

Being a new teacher, I don't have a large cache of materials that I can just pull out and use.

I stay at least 10-12 hours just at the school, and that's just doing administrative work (grading, phone calls, and the like), and then I get home and spend 3-4 hours more planning the lesson and creating the activities and printed materials for the next day right before I hit the hay.

I feel like I'm living, breathing, and eating teaching.

The actual planning part of what I need the students to learn is not difficult. I already have my objectives for the entire year planned out. I use Google Forms to quickly and easily document my lesson plans. The huge time consumption comes from having to search for good activity ideas, typing up worksheets and materials, writing up fill-in the blank notes, creating powerpoints and prezis, finding short videos, gathering materials (for labs), figuring out how I'm going to manage the logistics of complex activities, and this is all while dealing with my other duties such as staying up to date on my grading, making sure I improve my classroom management and control, and all the other responsibilities that come with teaching.

What I would like would be a guide from start to finish on how to most effectively plan my lessons. I don't need the stuff like the anticipatory set, blah blah, or the five E's of inquiry, I want to know how you approach it.

Do you plan on paper or on the computer? Do you pick a set day to begin planning each week? Each month? Do you plan in week or month, or 3-day intervals or maybe just the day before?

Do you create mind-maps to map out objectives and then place each objective on a certain calendar date and then figure out the activity from there?

Do you have internet resources from which you can quickly and easily match activities to meet your objectives? Do you use a lesson ideas book? Do you have a set few lesson templates (i.e. notes, foldables, etc. and you just pull a few general activities from there?)

Do you use specific textbook resources?

Do you plan everything around focus questions or do you pick the questions you're going to answer each day and pose those to students? I want details!!!

P.S. More information:

I teach 8th Grade Physical Sciences (chemistry, physics, astronomy concepts)

I have a CD that contained all the curriculum for 8th grade that I got from a cooperating teacher last year when I interned. He got it from someone else who got it from someone else. It's a start, but I don't really like a lot of the materials that are available there, so I usually end up remaking things from scratch or completely retyping up the materials to best fit my class if I use them at all. The way a lot of the material is presented is not intuitive or well chunked.

Anyway, advice and detailed walk-throughs of your planning strategies are most appreciated!

I would really love not being stressed to the point of tears each night while I freak out about what I'm going to be teaching the next day and all the preparation I have to get done before class starts.

Making plans with friends

mendel — Mon, 19 Nov 2012 16:58:47 -0800

How do grownups make plans? I like socializing with people, especially one-on-one or in small groups, but I don't do it anywhere near as much as I'd like. All sorts of people recommend fixing this by being the one to make plans. But I guess I missed that lesson: I don't know how to ask friends to do something with me.

Not dates, not Big Events, just going to grab a coffee, or my wife and I going out for dinner with another couple, or going to see a concert with someone, or whatever. It even seems weird to say "Hey, want to go grab a coffee sometime" -- but I know the thing about making plans is making specific plans, like "let's go for coffee on Saturday afternoon".

Somehow this seems harder than asking someone out on a date, because at least there's a script for that. How, if I don't already have a routine of meeting up with someone to do a thing, do I ask? How do you make plans with friends?

(In case it matters, I'm a guy.)

DIY sling stand/frame plans and component supplies

hippybear — Sun, 18 Nov 2012 17:05:41 -0800

I'm looking to put together a portable sling stand without paying upwards of $300 for one. Any suggestions on plans or materials? So, free-standing portable sling stands seem to be easy enough to find for purchase online, but I'd rather figure out a way to make my own without spending retail for it.

I've found these plans, [possibly NSFW] but the overall length of the pipes required and the wood and such, it doesn't seem to be overly portable, especially in my sub-compact car.

There are a zillion examples of this kind of set-up [NSFW] being sold online. I'm guessing that since it is so ubiquitous, there must be a way to buy the parts and assemble them into a kit. I just don't know what the correct search terms might be for those snap-together metal poles and the corner/cross joining points.

I'm looking for other available plans for building a sling stand or sling frame which aren't the same as that one, and/or suggestions about search terms or even links to places where I might be able to buy that snap-together metal tubing and the other bits I need to put together a kit of my own.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood... and I took the one where I went crazy for a month to raise my score 40 points... and that uh... has made all the difference?

Anonymous — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 06:00:29 -0800

GRE-Filter: I was happy with my GRE scores. Then, I received word that I have the opportunity to get into a super-duper-top-tier doctoral program previously inaccessible. However, my Quantitative Score--while still in the range of accepted scores over the years for this program--is now less-than-stellar relatively speaking. Is it crazy to think I could study intensely for about a month and improve my score 30-50 points? Am I overthinking this? When I took the GRE, I totally killed the Verbal and Writing sections in addition to my subject test, but nabbed a 700 on the Quantitative Section (which to my recollection is around the 65th percentile--marginally above average among test-takers generally). It was lower than I had hoped for given the tier of doctoral programs I am applying to, but it was unsurprising given my track record of Quantitative scoring on ETS-family tests. However, for the cool programs I was interested in, my score was nevertheless generally hovering around the median/mean for Quantitative. Furthermore, the field I am going into--while empirical and little-q quantitative--isn't a "hard science" or a discipline like engineering, and in addition requires a lot of interpersonal intelligence and pragmatic experience. Rather than nudge the Quantitative Score up to Superstar levels, I instead focused on boosting my publications and practical lab and statistical skills (successfully, yay!). (Also, taking the GRE is a miserable experience I rather did not wish to repeat ever ever ever, obviously).

Game changer arrives. During my official "Oh Please Write Me A Graduate School Letter" meeting with my Superdoctor boss, he informed me that a certain Rising Superstar in our field is actually a former student of his who just got tenure at Super Program. Superdoctor proceeds to say that I should seriously consider applying to work for Rising Star, as Superdoctor's word would carry a whole lot with him. This program is notoriously difficult to get into unless you have a direct connection to a tenured faculty member. So, while I had previously adored this man's work and had heard he is a truly fabulous, kind mentor... I hadn't really been considering this program as I didn't think I had a connection! However, at this Super Program my once neither-hurt-nor-help Quantitative Score is a negative I need to overcome rather than a total wash. Now, it is totally possible that I would not get into this program even if I were the Platonic ideal of a Graduate School Applicant In My Field. However, for better or for worse I have a somewhat internal locus of control, and would like to do whatever I can do to nudge the odds in my favor.

I just need 30-50 points to make that score go back to not really mattering one way or the other! So, Metafilter, is it possible to go from a 700 to a 730-50 on the GRE Quantitative Section with one frenzied month-and-change of studying? Are there any particular study techniques, guides, or aides (e.g., I know Kaplan has a Quantitative Drill computer program) you would recommend to accomplish this task? For the purposes of this question, let's assume my Verbal scores would be stable enough and that getting the scores to the school on late notice will not be a problem. Giving myself a month, what is the P90x or the 100-Pushups plan to become a GRE Math Master?

One hitch is that these previously-mentioned scores are actually from a year ago, from the older version of the GRE. (Very severe family troubles pushed back my graduate school plans a year). There are two disadvantages then: that I have not practiced GRE-style math in a year, and that the style of math is different than before. Step #1 which is taking place tomorrow or similar would be to see where I am at currently. I could imagine my advice from y'all being very different if I have regressed totally on GRE-style math vs. if I have maintained my previous scoring level. I am not sure yet whether the format change is something that will benefit me or not--I see that there are more data-oriented question, which makes me happy as I currently work as a data analyst.

Alternatively: is this a totally insane adventure, am I tilting at windmills? Am I being overly neurotic focusing on one aspect of my GRE scores when more-or-less all of my other ducks are in a row with regard to graduate school applications, for one program out of several good choices? Graduate school applications are stressful and may be hurting my perspective/reality testing, to say the least.

Thanks, MeFi!

Family cell phone plans

Kazimirovna — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 08:47:14 -0800

Please choose a family cell plan for us. We are four adults, we all want iPhones, we call and text a lot but not over 700 minutes a month. I get confused by all the possibilities and just want someone to choose for us. We live in MN.

DIY architecture

slidell — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 13:03:11 -0800

What are good resources for seeing sample house plans and construction drawings? Books would be great, especially less expensive books, but if there are online resources, that would be even better.

Just as one example, I need to give the city a drawing of how our exterior staircase will be built. The builder is giving me details like "4x4 post," but the city wants to see a typical attachment. I need to see how that's usually shown (e.g., is it drawn in perspective, or would something simpler suffice?).

That's just this week's example. Last month it was framing. Next week, who knows, lighting? (We're not changing lighting, so maybe they won't need us to draw that. But if one of the inspectors thinks we moved the lights, they may well ask me to give them something.)

Where could I look at examples to see how best to convey what we're planning to do? I'm always googling whatever it is I'm trying to draw, but are there better options that I'm unaware of? Thank you very much for any suggestions!

Also, I apologize if this is a bit repetitive with my earlier questions. I'm coming to realize I have many questions about plans, and i'm asking the question the way I am now to obviate any further questions here. Thanks again!

How do we find a cell phone plan that will meet our needs when we move to Canada?

seachange — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 19:09:55 -0800

Help us find a cell phone solution given that we are moving in 6 months (and we can't wait that long to replace our current Verizon phones) My spouse and I are longtime Verizon customers. We currently outside of our 2-year contracts, meaning we have very old crappy phones, and Verizon is trying to get us to re-up and sign another two year contract, with a new-phone-deal thrown in. We are moving to BC (from the US) in 6 months or less. . . unfortunately we will need to replace our phones before then, as they are currently barely usable.

Ideally we will find a solution where 1) we don't have to pay a huge amount for new phones, 2) we can replace our SIM cards in said phones when we move to Canada, 3) we don't have to sign some ridiculous contract, and 4) we can somehow manage to use these wondrous devices to talk to our family back home once we move (without paying extortionist rates)

As a bonus, I am somewhat interested in a smartphone w/ dataplan that would also be transferable to Canada.

Leaving Verizon seems like the first step, as I know they don't do SIM cards. Going prepaid seems like a workable solution, but beyond that, I am lost.

If it helps, we each currently talk on the phone for 400-500 minutes/month, and text occasionally. (We also can skype and call with google, which we will probably do a LOT more of once we are out of the US).

Gimme more workouts! But let's make sure they all play together nicely..

xicana63 — Sun, 08 Apr 2012 14:01:41 -0800

Workout plans to compliment Insanity workout? Hi I'm a 24yo/f/5ft5/180lbs, working on weight loss, and have just started the Insanity workout videos and I love it! I've also been doing Zumba classes at my gym 3/4 times a week, but am not sure if that's really the best way to go. I've worked w a trainer before and understand the importance of building muscle, perhaps others have a similar experience?

Can someone recommend workout plans that youve tried and compliment the Insanity workouts? Thanks!

Tutorial for drawing building plans for home construction with Google SketchUp

slidell — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 19:15:16 -0800

Is there a step-by-step tutorial on how to create working construction drawings with Google SketchUp? This must be on the Internet somewhere but after a weekend of searching and watching tutorials, I still haven't found it. I need to draft up a framing plan for the building rehab that I'm doing. I'm looking for a step-by-step tutorial for doing this with Google SketchUp. Can you point me to one? Surely this exists online somewhere (as a handout for an architecture class, an e-book, a FAQ in the Google SketchUp or Sketchucation forums...). I wouldn't mind paying a little money if it's really what I need. We're not making that many repairs, so this is mostly an "as built" plan. Several people will review this for me and make corrections, but I need to get a draft done.

If I'm using the wrong software, let me know. I picked SketchUp based on answers here and the fact that SketchUp was free, though I've since used my part-time student status to cheaply buy SketchUp Pro. I downloaded the free HouseBuilder and SketchUpBIM plugins for SketchUp. I haven't tried downloading a trial version of Revit. (I could, but I didn't start there, because I'd ideally like to have access to the files after 30 days.) I could try that if Revit would be much better.

I'm making slow but steady progress, but I do have a lot of questions about whether I could be doing this faster or better. If I want a framing plan and an image showing the finished surfaces, are those separate layers? Is it easier to build one first, or the other? I know how to quickly draw floor joists with the HomeBuilder Plug-In; now is there a plug-in that will install blocking and a detail for seismic clipping? What should I group together? Should I frame up my exterior walls for each level, then create a continuous exterior plane I can "stucco?"

In case my question still isn't clear, here's what I imagine a tutorial might sound like:

- First establish your house perimeter and ground floor plane. Create one large rectangle, and if your bottom floor is below grade, use the push-pull tool to offset it downward. Leave this rectangle on Layer 1,* but create a new layer for your wall framing. (* this might be completely wrong)
- Next, use the HouseBuilder plug-in to frame walls with the studs and spacing that you choose. To add windows, first build the entire wall, then use the WindowBuilder Plug-In* or manually...
- Once you're finished, select your walls and group* them. Create three groups: exterior walls, interior bearing walls, and non-structural partition walls.*
- If you want to draw in your foundation footer, download the new Structural Plug-In* and ...
- If you want to use this to show your client what the finished surfaces will look like, the easiest way to "drywall" this floor is to select your framing group, then use the offset tool... Create these on a new layer, since you will often want to see either the framing or the finished surface.*

Thanks for any pointers you have.

Need a vacation from vacation planning.

gursky — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 22:18:18 -0800

Does my Costa Rica trip itinerary make sense? I'm traveling to Costa Rica at the end of the month and I'm having trouble putting together a plan. I want to see different parts of the country but I am not sure what is manageable in a day, based on estimated bus times and distances...

My plans are as follows:

Day 1: Fly into San Jose, stay in San Jose overnight
Day 2-5: Puerto Viejo de Talamanca (this is booked)
Day 5: travel day - to Manuel Antonio via San Jose
Day 6: Manuel Antonio/Quepos
Day 7: back to San Jose - meet up with my brother and his girlfriend
Day 8-10: Monteverde
Day 10-12: La Fortuna
Day 13: back to San Jose for 6 PM flight to Mexico City

My questions:

1. Is getting from Puerto Viejo (Caribbean coast) to Manuel Antonio (Pacific Coast) too much for one day? Is that possible?
2. Is it worth going to Manuel Antonio/Quepos for one full day?
3. If my flight out of San Jose is at 6 PM, can I expect to make it to the airport on time if I leave La Fortuna that morning?

It's easier to book hostels and plan things when I have a loose idea of where I will be when! Thanks for your help.

Travel planning help.

Anonymous — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 14:46:26 -0800

Travel planning dilemma. Plans, friends, itinerary.. help! In a bit of a travel plan dilemma.

Living in China and I have roughly 4 weeks off Jan-Feb. My travel plans are not set in stone, but were along the idea of backpacking through SE Asia (Thailand, Cambodia, Thailand).

A friend had been in touch asking when I would have time off. I was never sure though and only had a rough idea. I still only know when I am able to leave, but still no exact return date.

My plan to backpack was going to seem feasible though-- I'm on a tight budget $1,500 and my return back to China can be made by train.

Turns out though now my friend will be flying into Beijing and there for about 2 weeks, but now with knowing the exact date I am able to leave China it seems his time in the country is smack in the middle of when I'd be doing my trip.

Prior to all of this, I did mention to them I wasn't sure what my plans were.. I had all sorts of ideas going on. First I was thinking about going to New Zealand, going to India.. the list goes on. I was and still just very unsure of what I'm doing and my school does help the situation much either with an unpredictable schedule. I emphasized this to them, but it didn't seem to sway a decision or spark up questions. They asked me for suggestions on where to go I answered them with some advice. They told me if prices were where they wanted it they would go for it.

So now they are going to be in Beijing and I'm still trying to figure out my travel plans. They mentioned to me on the phone that it was important for them to go to China for other reasons, but also to meet up with me for a few days as well.

Not sure how to handle this. Overall I want to enjoy my break the way I intended to. Afterall, I came to China to travel and explore countries. I gave up a lot, my job, apartment, car, etc because it was something I felt really drawn into and compelled to do. This was a year for me and I was vowing to myself to not compromise what other people wanted. I feel as though if I change up my plans or not do what I want. I'll have some resentment especially if something goes wrong or isn't much of what I might be interested in.

I'm not trying to sound selfish, but this was almost dropping a bomb on me with travel plans. While I knew before they were thinking of coming (and maybe I should have mentioned my uncertainty more clear and upfront), now I'm not sure how to handle this. I'm not sure if dropping by Beijing will really fit into my schedule or budget. It's completely out of my way provided I go that route.

Part of me is happy they are coming, but also I don't feel like I'm going to really enjoy myself and do what I want. Maybe I'm thinking about this too concrete though. Maybe I can change up my travel plans to include the stop. If so, what recommendations do you have? Any suggestions or ideas on how to move forward?

Long term planning

Anonymous — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:39:51 -0800

Ideally, this time next year, my husband and I will have a newborn in our lives! How to deal with people who want me to make plans and committments in the medium term future that will be affected by this goal? My husband and I are planning on getting pregnant very soon; I have an appointment later this month to get my IUD taken out, and then oh boy! It's baby time!

However, I've realized lately that I've had a couple of times recently where people have been asking me to make plans for things in the future that will likely be derailed by our baby plans. Two examples:
1) At my job recently, a project that we've been talking about for awhile is finally starting to come together. At a meeting, someone recommended me as a point person for one element of it. Yay, except the project will culminate in early 2013, when I am hoping to be out on maternity leave/working part time.
2) My mother-in-law and sister-in-law do a two day recreational bike ride every summer. Last two years, I did it with them and had a great time. Registration for the 2012 event is closing at the end of this week, and my MIL is preminding me to sign up again for it. I know it means a lot to her that I did it these past two years. I'd love to, but I'm planning on benig pregnant next summer. It's also an expensive registration fee, and nonrefundable, so I'd rather not pay it if I'm planning on not doing it.

I don't want to tell people my baby plans, first, because I know it might take me longer than expected to get pregnant, and second, because I'm just a private kind of person who doesn't like to reveal that kind of personal information about myself.

I'm wondering how to deal with people who are asking me to make these medium-range plans, when I have long term plans of my own. This isn't something I really thought about until recently!

(Advice with the bike ride event especially wanted, since registration for it ends soon!)

New Android phone in Toronto - Bell? Rogers? Someone else?

ManInSuit — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 09:28:10 -0800

New Android phone in Toronto - Bell? Rogers? Someone else? Hi. After a few years on Fido with a now-ancient iPhone 3G, which is starting to not work so well. I am looking to switch to an Android phone, and probably a new carrier. I am looking for advice and tips.

I mostly use my phone in Toronto. But it's important to me to be able to use the phone (for both voice and data) when I am out of the city.

I would like to share my data with my iPad, and possibly a data stick (though I understand I can use the phone to tether - data stick seems more convenient).

I am thinking, most likely, of switching to either Rogers or Bell, because my sense is these are the only companies that have wide networks, and allow for data sharing.

I want to get a pretty good/fast Android Phone: The Samsung Galaxy S2 (available on Bell) looks very good to me from what I've read in reviews. I'm not sure if there's a comparably powerful phone with Rogers yet.

My understanding Both Rogers and Bell have very similar plans, that offer something like this:

- a bunch of weekday minutes (300 with rogers, 200 w. Bell)
- 10 "free" numbers across, with unlimited incoming/outgoing calls across Canada, even if I'm out of town.
- 6GB monthly data. Tethering allowed.
- An additional $10-$15 per month for voicemail and Caller ID
- Can share other devices for $10/month. (I think Bell may not allow the data stick...)

All this is $65 for the basic plan + $12 or so for voicemail + $10 per shared device. This seems okay to me.

Here are some questions:

1) Are there any differences between the plans that I have not noticed, that I should be aware of?

2) Everything else being equal - Are there any strong reasons to choose between Bell and Rogers? Does either have a substantially better network, for example? Some other feature that makes one preferable to the other?

3) Is there some plan from some other provider that would give me all this stuff (including good coverage outside of Toronto) that I am overlooking?

4) The Galaxy S2 is "coming soon" to Rogers. But I want to get a new phone soon (and don't want to miss out on the promotional plans that are expire on Sept 30). Would there be any way to sign up for a plan, and get the better phone when it comes out in a couple months?

Any advice very much appreciated!!!

Put the ball in her court, nothing happened. Keep trying?

Anonymous — Mon, 16 May 2011 17:13:28 -0800

Went on two great dates with a girl I really liked. Texted for a third date and didn't get a response. Move on? Or reach out one last time? I'm normally pretty good at gauging whether or not I'm connecting with someone and in this case, I really thought I was. For context, we had loosely discussed a third date on our second, and a few days afterward as well (I proposed a later date and she suggested maybe even sooner). So I was sort of shocked when I received no response when I tried to make official plans last Thursday and I figure that if she was really interested she would have gotten back to me by now.

There is still some socially inept part of me that wants to follow up and reach out one last time in a "hey did you get my message last week?" sort of way, to ensure that my message wasn't lost or failed to send on her side or something. But I also don't want to put her on the spot in case she WAS blowing me off and in case she did in fact want to avoid the awkwardness of turning me down by just not responding (which I understand some people will do, in our day and age). The last thing I want to do is be one of those guys that creep out or annoy a woman who isn't interested.

Is there any tactful way to go about this? Or is it time to pack it up and move on?

What sort of business/management training is relevant to lawyers?

Kurichina — Thu, 12 May 2011 09:57:50 -0800

What sort of business/management training is relevant to lawyers? I work in a government department, where we have a few thousand dollars per fiscal year per employee for training, and we need to select courses "related to our job" or promotional opportunities within the department. Basically, the idea is training us for a career path in the government.

However, for a number of reasons, I don't see my long-term future as working towards management in government, particularly in the department I work in as while the people are great, I'm in an activity area that's not particularly relevant to either my current altruistic interests (civil liberties, privacy and human rights) nor to my academic background (comparative democracies and international relations). I'm in the process of applying to law schools (to start in Fall 2012), but for financial reasons I'll be working for at least one more fiscal year, so I may as well spend my learning budget.

So, my question is to those in the legal profession (either public/crown or in private or corporate practice): what sort of management or business training would you have found useful when starting your careers that isn't included in a legal education? The budget allows for very short-term courses. I'm looking at subjects related to planning, risk management, etc, that I could make a case for in my current role, but since I see myself going into some variety of litigation or possibly becoming a crown, it would be nice to take something that could potentially help me there, too.

How to Build a Cavas Winter Tent?

kuatto — Fri, 06 May 2011 18:47:01 -0800

I would like to build a canvas winter camping tent. I'm looking for materials and plans. Any recommendations? I want to build a canvas tent. Something along the lines of a Snow trekker tent. Has anyone purchased large amounts of canvas? I've heard that Egyptian Cotton is the best kind to get, are there sources to purchase this material? And do you have any other recommendations for procuring canvas? What is a satisfactory thread count? Also, is it feasible to treat the canvas for mildew resistance?

Also we're looking resources that have plans for wall tents or pyramid tents. Any references to books or literature on tent plans would be appreciated.

PS: Winter Camping is Really Fun!

What summer activities would be good for a college student at short notice?

LSK — Wed, 04 May 2011 20:42:39 -0800

What's a college student to do over the summer after disrupted plans? The bullet points:
- Undergraduate at a large public research university in the Midwest studying economics, psychology, and sociology.
- Interested in doing research work over the summer at another institution if at all possible.
- Currently has no summer plans, but would like to change that.
- Has around $800 in funds for anything discretionary.

My previous plan: I applied for multiple internships in my field of interest, decision-making, at universities I was interested in studying as a graduate student at. However, all of these internships received a large number of applicants, and I received some very pleasant, personalized rejection letters to the effect of, "You'd be really good in this position, but unfortunately, so would a couple of other people, and we chose them."

My default plan: I'd return home and spend three months living with my parents.

A potential backup: I could theoretically stay here over the summer and take a class. However, I'd really like to get out of this college town, and I'd absolutely love to see another city. Ultimately, I'd like to do something productive over the summer, something I could point to as time well spent.

So, what are some good ways to spend a summer, on a reasonable budget? My mother has said that, conditional on my finding an activity, she will pay for reasonably-priced lodging, but that I need to pay for anything discretionary.

I'm aware that I asked something very similar at this time last year. At this point, however, the following key things have changed:

- My field of study is much better-defined.
- I have made multiple attempts to apply for programs.
- This is the last summer of my undergraduate career.

I love it when a plan comes together

twinight — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 17:27:36 -0800

Tell me your favorite movies about the successful execution of a plan. I was thinking of the kinds of movies I tend to really enjoy: heist movies, prison escape movies, revenge movies, and movies about long cons. And I realized that they're all variations on the same theme: the ability of a person or group to execute a plan they've committed themselves to.

I want to watch more of these types of movies. I find them inspiring, even when they're kind of ridiculous.

So I'd like your suggestions of some of your favorite movies in these categories or in different genres where a person or people devote themselves to a plan which they then follow to achieve some goal.

- The more complicated and clever the plan is, the better.
- The more easily quantifiable the objective, the better. ("Let's steal the diamonds" is better than "Let's improve the school system."
- A training montage is usually a good sign.

Help me build a special dog ramp

If only I had a penguin... — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 17:47:04 -0800

Help me design a ramp to fit over a staircase for a dog to go up and down. My parents’ dog has arthritis. My parents house has a hardwood floor staircase that she can’t go down comfortably. She slips and frequently falls down the stairs and it’s obviously painful and stressful for her to go down. I’d like to build her a ramp with some ridges (i.e. pieces of wood set up as crossbars so her feet don’t slip). Two catches inside. I can figure out how to build the ramp itself. However,

Catch #1: My mom has arthritis, too. When she goes up and down the stairs she has to lead with one leg, which means she has to up one side of the stairs and down the other. So the ramp has to be easily moveable from one side of the staircase to the other, by someone with arthritis, which means it shouldn’t require great strength and it should be do-able without bending over (bending over at the top of a staircase is a bad idea for anyone, anyway).

Catch #2: No modifications to the staircase/wall etc. themselves. This should be something that sits on top of the staircase and can be removed/put back etc. (though this need not be doable by someone with arthritis).

The staircase is not wide enough to just put the ramp in the middle. It is 8 or 9 stairs tall with walls on either side. Straight (no turns or landings).

Any ideas on how to do this? Triple super-duper bonus points and best answers for any actual plans/pictures of a system like this (or like part of this, since it’s a pretty peculiar request).

Need a good phone + plan combo

antgly — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 16:18:12 -0800

Currently I'm on a RAZR V3x with a T-Mobile prepaid plan. I'm thinking of switching to a better phone, however the plan options look intimidating. I'm wondering if there is any iPhone or Android phone + plan combo that is a good deal for me. Anything that would have a $30 or $40 a month plan would be fine for me. I'm pretty much a disgrace as I'm a complete techie yet everyone else has a better phone than me and my only reason is the cost of the plans.

What do I do with my life?

LarrenD — Mon, 28 Feb 2011 17:59:26 -0800

Please help me figure out what to do with my life I apologize in advance if this is too rambly or doesn't have a very specific question, but I'll just try to give you my situation and ask for any and all advice that you have to offer.

I had parents that were very supportive in the let you do whatever the fuck you want sort of way, and as a result I have quit almost everything I have ever done. I took piano lessons for almost seven years and never practiced, and now I don’t remember any of it and regret it. I played soccer for a few years, but felt like quitting one day and I haven’t played any sports since and regret it. I was artistic, and drawing/making things was what I did with most of my free time as a kid but for some reason I got tired of it and quit, and now I regret it. I think that the only reason I have gotten anywhere is that I’m personable and fairly good looking. From grade school teachers to my high school Headmaster to my Batallion Commander, all of my authority figures have stood by and watched me severely fuck everything up, only to forgive me and give me second and third chances because they all wanted to be the ones that helped me realize the “amazing potential” that I have.

After about a month at college, it should come as no surprise that I decided a mechanical engineering degree sounded pretty boring and left. Because I had no clue what to do after that, I made the mistake of walking into a recruiter’s office and thought that joining the Army on a whim while knowing nothing about it sounded like a pretty romantic thing to do. In my head I was Ernest Hemmingway going off to drive ambulances in Italy, but it turns out that joining the military during two major wars is something not to be done unless you know exactly what you are doing and are damn sure that it’s what you want.

While there are a few people that I get along with, I have almost nothing in common with anybody that I work with. Not only does being in the Army totally suck ass, but after taking some time to think about it I really hate the fact that I’m in the military and supporting what the military stands for. I might just be a helicopter mechanic, but those helicopters are used in direct support of people whose job is to kill people. I do my best to get along on my own, but it gets pretty old being surrounded by people that I want nothing to do with. I’m stationed in rural Kansas, so my options for building a social life are about as limited as they can be. There’s a college pretty close to post, but the people that I would be willing to hang out with are the ones that see my haircut and want nothing to do with me.

When it comes up that I have no intention of staying in the military, the next question is always what I’m going to do afterwards. I never have the slightest clue how to respond, because even though I’ve had plenty of time to come up with an answer I have absolutely no idea what to do with my life. There are things that I enjoy doing, like snowboarding and backpacking, but when it comes to really knowing what it is that I want to do, I can’t come up anything. Over the years of school, the classes that I have enjoyed most have been art classes. I went to a pretty small high school (120 people), so about half the school was involved with the musical and it really didn’t matter if you knew what you were doing or not. I got a lead part in two of them, and I really enjoyed that as well as being in chorus. I took a ceramics class, and that was one of my favorite classes that I’ve ever taken. Over the years, I’ve wished I was more artistic and tried to do some art stuff on my own, but It’s been so long since I gave up on it as a kid that I never have any clue where to start. The closest thing I can come up with for something that I would want to do with my life is be an artist, but the small amount of artsy stuff that I’ve done has been one-off just for fun and school related.

I’m just getting back from a year in Iraq where I’ve had a whole lot of time to think about everything, and I’ve decided that it’s time I made some resolute plans and stuck with them. So far I’ve decided to buy a keyboard and re-learn piano, find a pick-up soccer league and start playing, and learn how to cook. Apart from those fairly short term goals, I still have no idea what to do with myself.

I apologize again for all of the rambling, so heres the TL;DR –

1)After finishing the two years that I have left in the military, any recommendations for what I should do with my life, or how to figure it out?

2)In the meantime, how do I survive life in rural Kansas without going insane?

More relevant details: 22, M, originally from the Pacific Northwest