Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with phonesex

A question about d/s in a long distance relationship.

Anonymous — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 19:46:12 -0800

Long-time pervert, first-time top, in love with a wonderful submissive girl who lives halfway across the country. We're looking for ways to satisfy our particular combination of kinks when we can't be together in person. NSFW details inside. Yeah, I know, phone sex and video chat. We're up to speed there. But there's a particular combination of tastes that we can't figure out how to satisfy. See...

...what I enjoy about topping is getting a reaction that shows me what she's feeling. It's not the spanking I like, it's the yelp. So my first impulse, when it comes to phone or video sex, is to be all "talk to me, tell me how it feels, tell me what you're thinking, call me Sir, blah blah blah." But...

...the more submissive she's feeling, and the more she's turned on, the less verbal she gets. In person, that's fine, because I can still get the feedback I enjoy from her body language. Over the phone, it makes things pretty one-sided, and even by video I find her body language harder to read somehow. So, okay, that leaves me to talk dirty to her, or to give her orders. But...

...the other catch is, she's not at all into humiliation. All the dominant-sounding dirty talk I can think of is humiliating one way or another: bitch this and slut that and filthy whore and, you know, we really just don't want to go there.

So far, my repertoire as a phone sex top is pretty much limited to "good girl" — and she says she likes that a lot, and it really seems to capture the dynamic we're both looking for, but it sure does get repetitive.

So we've been talking about this. I'd like to have more I can say to her to put her in a submissive state of mind, but I'm not sure what. She says she'd like to have things she can do to show her submission that don't require her to talk, but she's not sure what.

Suggestions?

FWIW, here are some things we really like when we get to play in person: spanking and other kinds of impact play, bondage, obedience-type d/s — including a certain amount of the whole be-a-brat-and-get-punished thing. Things we really don't like at all: humiliation, "roleplaying" (I'm not Lord Zarquon of Gor, I'm not a Nazi pirate captain moonlighting as a boarding school headmaster, I'm her boyfriend), chastity/orgasm denial (why would I want her to get off less?), the usual scat-blood-and-animals trifecta.

Phone sex for women?

Unnecessarily Sarcastic Bitch — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 06:52:21 -0800

Professional phone sex for women looking for men, do they exist? Specifically, I'm looking for a line, company or site that deals exclusively with women who are looking for phone sex from men. Yes, this a serious request and please, no snark.

Talk to me, baby

CitizenD — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 13:01:03 -0800

How would a person go about becoming a phone sex operator? I have a great voice, a way with words, a remarkable imagination and...a nearly-empty bank account. While I'm struggling to find "real work," I've been thinking of becoming a phone sex operator.

However, I have no idea how to do so. And, in the initial research I've attempted, I'm confused. Anyone in the hivemind have any suggestions?

How can I work anonymously?

Anonymous — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 19:55:48 -0800

I have a good deal of experience as a phone sex operator. Recently, I decided I would like to go into business for myself rather than work for an agency. I don't think it's legally possible to incorporate anonymously, but still I'd like to keep my real legal identity as private as possible. Any tips? I'd like everything to be on the up-and-up financially/legally speaking, but since the phone sex business encourages obsessive behavior, it's absolutely crucial to hide any/all identifying information about me from even the most persistent clients. Is there any way for me to safely/legally go independent? Or am I doomed to give up more than half my income to a middleman forever?

Phone Sex Tips?

Anonymous — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 22:05:20 -0800

Phone Sex tips? My SO thinks phone sex will help us remain close while he is out of town (consulting work) for the next few months. I have problems letting go under even the most ideal circumstances; the idea of phone sex seems awkward and uncomfortable. Any tips on how to make phone sex seem less awkward and more natural? To be honest, I kind of cringe at the thought of phone sex. Potentially relevant: it is still a newish relationship so there isn't an intense amount of emotional closeness yet.

Billing for SMS/phone services in China and Saudi Arabia

DecemberRaine — Thu, 24 Nov 2005 23:06:53 -0800

I'm looking to break into paypertex/call SMS and/or phone services in untapped markets like China and Saudi Arabia, and need some suggestions for SMS or phone billing systems that will give me a platform accessable by citizens in these countries. Any suggestions?