Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with pace

New relationship

Anonymous — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 16:39:13 -0800

New relationship filter - ex-semi-drama queen here, how do i keep this going, slow and steady and not rush in? I've known this guy for about 5 years. Realized I may have feelings for him about 1.5 years ago. Never said anything to him because we were developing a good friendship and did not want to screw anything up.

Some specifics: he's had one night stands, but never a real relationship. admits to not being very emotional, is a pretty stoic individual. our friendship was very healthy, talk on the phone once/week, hang out 1-2 times a month. both have our own sets of friends and lives going on.

me: i think he is extremely attractive and so smart. i have had 2 semi-relationships in the past (last one being 2 years ago) that were both filled with rushing in too fast, high drama, the works. a lot of it was my fault -- i was a late bloomer and didn't have any relationships till my 20s and when i was semi-in-one, i thought that the high hi's (crazy butterflies, infatuation) and the low low's (dramatic heartbreak) = passion = romance - tru luv.

i have grown up a lot since then, become less insecure and more confident, developed a life of my own, and now know that the drama queen crap is not attractive and serves a relationship no purpose. (like, for instance, if i asked my guy if he found so-and-so attractive and he did, i would sulk and be jealous-- clearly this was entirely dumb of me b/c he's just being truthful and i was totally being insecure, but at the time i would just be hurt and offended)

So, presently: i really dig this guy a lot. how do i not mess this up? esp. since he's never been in a relationship, but has indicated to me that he wants to be in one with me..... sometimes he won't be as emotional as i want him to be in his words, but i have kept my mouth shut, b/c i know it is hard for him and i know he is showing me his feelings through his actions (i.e. he so wouldn't be hanging with me right now if he wasn't in to me -- he's the kinda guy that just likes hanging out with the guys).

Tips for keeping a relationship simple? what i like about him is he is really about no drama, and will run the other way if i break out my old habits. i just feel so warm and comfortable around him. i just feel like there is potential for me to get frustrated since he may not know how to "act" in a relationship (although, not that my actions in the past were necessarily oscar-worthy)... and if i do get frustrated, how do i deal without being dramatic and high strung again--even though i may or am hurt?

sorry for the rambling.

What's the best way to pace yourself when reading?

gregb1007 — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 16:46:04 -0800

What's the best way to pace yourself when reading? I recently realized that I have two different styles of reading with regard to pacing. One: I move along rather rapdily, breezing through the pages. Two: I savor every word and every sentence.

What is the best way to read: fast or slow? When I read fast, I am happy to have a story unfold for me before my eyes. But when I read slow, I take joy in lingering on the words and images, savoring every sentence.

Have you found a good way of balancing the tendency to read fast and slow, so that you both get to enjoy a book's details and yet not have to literally absorb every word and image at the speed of a snail crawling?

How do distance runners set and keep pace while running?

MasD — Sun, 26 Nov 2006 23:45:26 -0800

How do distance runners set and keep pace? Can someone please explain to me how distance runners calculate the pace they intend to run while they're actually running.

Also, bonus points for information on how to keep pace accurately.

Quick: answer my question. HONK! Sorry. Too slow. You lose!

grumblebee — Wed, 23 Aug 2006 18:38:12 -0800

Why are there fast people and slow people? Why do different people have different paces? I'm a fast person. I do everything fast. I talk fast; I walk fast; I think fast. I get easily impatient with anyone slow (moving or witted). Why?

I'm in fairly good shape, and I work out. But I didn't used to. I used to be a "couch potato" and my diet was horrible. I've never been athletic. I prefer reading to physical activity. Still, I'm fast and I've always been fast. Changes in my age (I'm 40) and lifestyle don't seem to matter.

When I learn a new idea, I don't need time to process it. I'm immediately using it and putting it through all sorts of permutations. I almost never need a break to rest my brain.

In case anyone thinks I'm feeding my ego here, I'm not. I don't think fast = better. I don't think it = worse, either. There are good and bad aspects to it. Yes, I think fast, and that can make me SEEM smart. But it also means I miss things and make mistakes because I'm zooming through life. I am horrible at just "being" (I'm un-Zen), and I get bored easily.

There seems to be a genetic component to this. My grandmother was fast like me. Way up into her 80s she was zooming ahead of everyone on the street and not suffering fools gladly. (Usually the "fools" were just people who couldn't come up with an immediate answer to her questions. If someone needed a fraction of a second to think, he was an "idiot.")

Why am I like this? Why are other people not like this? Why are there so many different people with so many different paces? It it "metabolism"? It it just upbringing? Is it ADD vs. non-ADD? Some combination of these things? Has anyone ever studied this? Books? Essays? Websites?

Help me choose which low rent NYC university to attend

incomple — Wed, 18 Jan 2006 11:33:37 -0800

I'm a twenty-one year old drop out who's looking to go back to school to get my English degree. My grades, while decent, weren't spectacular, and I can't afford NYU or New School. It's probably going to be CUNY (Hunter or Baruch) or Pace, both being fairly reasonably priced (especially, in CUNY's case, if you're a resident of NYC). BUT... ...Neither school seems to have a particular advantage over the other when it comes to my major, and before I spend the money on Pace's application fee, I'm wondering if its reputation makes it worth the bother. It's one of those schools where it seems like everyone knows the name, but no one knows anything about it.

So basically I'm wondering what school should be my first choice, what's Pace's reputation when it comes to their English program, and most importantly, which school will look better on a resume.

If anyone has any other suggestions for good liberal arts schools that have low standards for admission, I'd like to hear them. Thanks!