134 posts tagged with okcupid.
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I'm invisible in real life, but do well in online dating [27/m]

In real life women don't flirt with me, smile at me in public, or glance at me when they walk past me. However, with online dating I do really well. What gives? I'm starting to suspect I'm just really photogenic and I'm a bit of a dog in real life.
posted by GiveUpNed on Jul 20, 2015 - 22 answers

Permission to judge this OKCupid profile! (31F in NYC)

Hey guys! I just re-joined OKCupid a month ago and haven't received many messages. It's nerve-wracking to post my profile here, but who knows: maybe you can help! [more inside]
posted by jessca84 on Jul 19, 2015 - 51 answers

Baffling OKCupid situation

Help me understand what’s happening with my OKCupid profile. In the first 36 hours on joining I had 382 likes and 76 messages (none worthwhile). Since then, not a thing. What’s your take on this? Bonus question: is OKCupid the right place these days to look for a long-term partner? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 14, 2015 - 15 answers

OKLooptid

My OKCupid profile is an experience. Help me make it a good experience. [more inside]
posted by Parasite Unseen on Jul 13, 2015 - 17 answers

Judge My OKCupid Profile!

After getting out of a long relationship, I relit my OKCupid profile. And the response has been essentially nonexistent. Can you point to anything that I'm doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by mcmile on Jul 9, 2015 - 33 answers

How much of an explanation do I owe this guy after one date?

I went out with a guy from OKCupid who seemed awkward but raised no huge red flags. Less than a week later, he got weird and I'm no longer interested. Do I need to tell him this? [more inside]
posted by intheigloo on Jun 20, 2015 - 21 answers

Am I over-reacting?

I met up with this guy from OkCupid two weeks ago, and he seemed really charming. We've met up around three times to do various activity-oriented things in the city. He's done a few things to set off my alarm bells, and I'm not sure it's safe to see him anymore. At the same time, maybe these things are no big deal. Details inside [more inside]
posted by MFZ on May 13, 2015 - 79 answers

OK Cupid for the uninitiated

…and various other OKC questions and discomforts [more inside]
posted by miorita on Apr 3, 2015 - 18 answers

Is online dating a good idea? If so, which site should I choose?

I'm 23 years old and I have had limited experience with dating in person. I'm pretty busy with school that it keeps me from meeting people I like. Therefore, I've considered doing online dating but I'm a little concerned about catfish and people who just want to hookups. For those of you who have experience with online dating, does online dating have a good pool of people who look for a serious relationship? If so, are paid sites like eHarmony or match.com better than free sites such as OKCupid? Thank you for your response!
posted by missybitsy on Mar 24, 2015 - 31 answers

Encourage the good guys

To men and women who partake in online dating: how should I respond to the rare person who actually sends a nice, thoughtful message, but to whom I'm not attracted? I don't want them to get discouraged because they are actually doing it right! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 30, 2015 - 41 answers

Your turn or mine?

Straight women of MetaFilter: do you message first in online dating? If not, why? [more inside]
posted by bonje on Jan 10, 2015 - 41 answers

unspoken rules of online dating?

Please school me on the unspoken rules of online dating. [more inside]
posted by headnsouth on Dec 29, 2014 - 17 answers

The Etiquette of Online Dating

I probably should have done some research first but I signed up for match.com and OkCupid and am now kind of overwhelmed with contact. (This is not a request for a profile critique!) [more inside]
posted by pintapicasso on Dec 2, 2014 - 25 answers

I think I need more help than a profile critique...

I've been a member of OKCupid for seven years, met most of my friends and both of my partners (polyamorous) there. I've had a very healthy and fruitful relationship with the site in the past. But lately, I've been spending an absurd proportion of my time there, and getting very few results. I don't think the problem is my profile, I think it's this new fixation with getting messages... [more inside]
posted by dee lee on Oct 21, 2014 - 10 answers

Ethics involved in dating people your friend has dated casually?

Short version: what are the ethics involved in dating people your friend has dated casually? [more inside]
posted by thelivingsea on Oct 13, 2014 - 16 answers

What Do You See In This OK Cupid Profile?

I'm not looking for advice about my OKC Profile so much as I want to get your impression of what it's saying. [more inside]
posted by These Five Dollar Socks Are Green on Oct 1, 2014 - 37 answers

Oh Wise Ones...I need your OkCupid Profile Help!

Getting back in the online dating saddle, and I would love some honest critiques of my profile. In the past I haven't had much luck, but I've decided to give it another go (and yes, I'm aware of the dismal stats on black women, but I also think my profile could have been stronger). So for those of you who enjoy this sort of thing, any advice you have to offer would be fantastic. [more inside]
posted by Fiorentina97 on Sep 18, 2014 - 21 answers

But I want to let myself feel the butterflies!

Started online dating. Having trouble processing a pair of dates I recently went on with someone – surely, it wasn’t just me? [more inside]
posted by un petit cadeau on Sep 15, 2014 - 28 answers

OkCupid clinic

After years I finally did a re-haul/update of my OkCupid profile. If you enjoy this sort of thing, please help me with your wisdom. My profile. [more inside]
posted by Salamandrous on Sep 8, 2014 - 34 answers

Another "critique my OkCupid profile!" Please impart your dating wisdom.

I've linked my profile Here. I'm planning on getting better pictures, but welcome any other suggestions. [more inside]
posted by seraph9 on Aug 26, 2014 - 26 answers

How do I... do OKCupid?

Whew. Just put up my OKC profile for the first time ever! Looking for advice and some pointers. [more inside]
posted by un petit cadeau on Aug 25, 2014 - 29 answers

OkCupid code words?

I've noticed in my travels on OK Cupid that there seem to be a few code words in play on the site --- for example, mentioning the movie Secretary in the movies/books section seems to pretty consistently be a gentle hint that the person is either into BDSM themselves or at least kink friendly. It made me wonder what other key words may be out there that I'm missing out on, in case I've put them in my profile or see them in others'. What is the modern handkerchief code?
posted by maggiepolitt on Aug 12, 2014 - 35 answers

I'm really good at...Nothing?

OKCupidfilter and beyond...How do I make me seem less boring? [more inside]
posted by Soap D. Spencer on Aug 5, 2014 - 30 answers

Conceal medical cannabis use in dating profile?

Should I disclose my frequent medical marijuana use in an online dating profile? [more inside]
posted by morganw on Jul 29, 2014 - 33 answers

Gather round, OKC profile critics...

I know the topic of OKCupid profile critiques is polarizing. Those who enjoy picking apart profiles and judging photos, please bring your honesty and step on up. [more inside]
posted by justonegirl on Jun 30, 2014 - 32 answers

What is the most polite way to turn down a request for a second date?

So, I've jumped into online dating. It's going oddly better than expected, such that I now have a couple etiquette questions: 1) how do I politely turn down a request for a second date? He seems like a kind person and I'd like to avoid hurting his feelings inasmuch as possible, but I wasn't quite feeling that spark of attraction. Is there some equivalent of Miko's breakup talk for this that will help here, something clear but gentle? Also... [more inside]
posted by maggiepolitt on Jun 13, 2014 - 28 answers

Yet another OKC profile critique request

So far my response rate seems pretty low compared to I've heard is typical. Is there anything in my profile that might be the cause? [more inside]
posted by doctord on Jun 2, 2014 - 31 answers

I'll miss you till I meet you

This terrifies me a little bit...but I was wondering if you lovely people could take a look at my profile and let me know what you think of it. See anything I should improve? (I'm a woman looking to date women.) [more inside]
posted by zahava on May 16, 2014 - 30 answers

I know I'm not a supermodel, but COME ON

I used OKCupid successfully in my last city, a place in the Midwest with population 300,000. Since moving to NYC a year ago I have had the most dreadful luck with it. OKCupid profile critique and dating hand-wringing and angst inside. [more inside]
posted by unannihilated on May 16, 2014 - 102 answers

OKC Profile, n+1+n

So it's been awhile since I've used OKC, just reactivated the profile, and it's now past due for an overhaul. [more inside]
posted by Matched plain socks on May 7, 2014 - 14 answers

OkCupid: Why is my inbox not flooded and what's wrong with my pictures?

I'm a woman that just made a new OK Cupid account after a long hiatus. The amount of messages I'm getting are abysmal compared to when I was on the site six months ago. What am I doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on May 2, 2014 - 49 answers

What do I do when okcupid intersects real life?

So, I was always terrified of this happening, but then I got over it. Well, it turns out I was right- eventually, if I stay on okcupid long enough, I'm going to hit the end of single men my age in my city. [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Apr 17, 2014 - 38 answers

Let me know what you think of my OKCupid profile?

Sorry to continue the recent trend of OKCupid profile reviews, but I'd like more feedback on mine. [more inside]
posted by MeaninglessMisfortune on Apr 11, 2014 - 19 answers

OKC Profilefilter, Part n+1

I've just gotten back on OKC after a year away. Let's critique my profile! [more inside]
posted by Maecenas on Apr 10, 2014 - 44 answers

Again with the OKCupid nonsense

I'm back on OKCupid after some time spent getting my head on straight (well, bi I guess). I'd like some third party advice on my profile. Friends are ok, but they're too nice to be really helpful. [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz on Mar 31, 2014 - 52 answers

Another OKCupid Profile Critique

I need some assistance in updating my okcupid profile. [more inside]
posted by cinemafiend on Mar 26, 2014 - 26 answers

Am I un-datable without a smart phone?

No, seriously. Should I buy an iPhone just to get on Tindr. And yes, I'm that desperate. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 24, 2014 - 24 answers

"Am I too wacky?" - another OkCupid profile review

Loads of "hooks", as received wisdom says is the right thing to do - but does it make me sound undateably wilfully eccentric? Profile here. Any and all feedback welcome, whether it's related to my suspected issues with the profile or not. [more inside]
posted by Junebug79 on Mar 9, 2014 - 45 answers

What should a lady write to get a date?

Men of Mefi who have ever messaged a lady on OkCupid, what specifically made you want to message her, in her profile? [more inside]
posted by stockpuppet on Feb 18, 2014 - 29 answers

Married to our jobs, but seeing each other on the side

How do I avoid shop talk on dates? [more inside]
posted by Sara C. on Jan 8, 2014 - 34 answers

Another Okcupid profile review.

Just started a new account. Maybe you guys can help me out? [more inside]
posted by MeaninglessMisfortune on Jan 4, 2014 - 22 answers

Online dating is a numbers game, so help me improve my numbers

Like most straight guys on OKCupid, I'm lucky if I get a response to one in ten messages I send. This would be fine if I could fire off several messages every day, but I'm running into writer's block. One-liners and templates don't work, and I rarely know how to compose a longer message to someone I know next to nothing about. (I'm a mumchance kind of guy; I'm terrible at small talk even with friends I've known for years.) Help stir my creative juices, tell me what kinds of messages have got your attention in the past, oh and why not critique my profile while you're at it. [more inside]
posted by zeri on Dec 18, 2013 - 45 answers

Am I doing something *wrong* in my Okcupid profile? Can I stop?

OKCupidFilter, sorry. I am getting dramatically fewer visitors and messages these past couple weeks. I haven't gotten a year older. I tried switching around pictures, editing answers, all the stuff I could think of to do. But, other than the "hey, beautiful lady, I hop ur write me back!" messages, I'm getting crickets. Here is my profile. (Please be nice, I know I'm older.) Is there something I can do to fix this? Or is it out of my hands? Thanks ever so much!
posted by The Noble Goofy Elk on Dec 17, 2013 - 46 answers

Ambiguous not-dating friendship

How should I interpret this man's behaviour? I met a guy on OkCupid. I'm confused by his behaviour and would appreciate some, any, insights from the Hive Mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 1, 2013 - 36 answers

Is you is or is you ain't a possiblity?

Having read a lot of relationship/dating AskMes, I've decided rather than wait for a relationship to fall into my lap, I should try the whole online dating thing. I am finding it rather frustrating and confusing, and hope the hive mind can help me understand it a bit better. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by Athanassiel on Nov 9, 2013 - 19 answers

reverse cell phone number search

How to get information about a cell phone user with just the number when nothing comes up with cursory google search? [more inside]
posted by fromageball on Nov 6, 2013 - 6 answers

How am I not myself?

I've been aggressively single for a while now and I'm ready for a change. Step One: rewrite my OkCupid profile? [more inside]
posted by modernserf on Oct 10, 2013 - 20 answers

That went well, right?

Had a great first date with a woman who seems pretty busy. She cancelled our second date, asked for a rain check, and I haven't heard from her since. What's the etiquette here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 26, 2013 - 21 answers

origin of OkCupid "How is this Site Treating You?" question

Where does "How's your luck on the site?" come from? [more inside]
posted by bearette on Sep 22, 2013 - 7 answers

A friendly rejection

What's the friendliest way to decline future dates from someone you've been out with a few times but just aren't that into? [more inside]
posted by greta simone on Aug 18, 2013 - 14 answers

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