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123 posts tagged with okcupid.
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The Etiquette of Online Dating

I probably should have done some research first but I signed up for match.com and OkCupid and am now kind of overwhelmed with contact. (This is not a request for a profile critique!) [more inside]
posted by pintapicasso on Dec 2, 2014 - 25 answers

I think I need more help than a profile critique...

I've been a member of OKCupid for seven years, met most of my friends and both of my partners (polyamorous) there. I've had a very healthy and fruitful relationship with the site in the past. But lately, I've been spending an absurd proportion of my time there, and getting very few results. I don't think the problem is my profile, I think it's this new fixation with getting messages... [more inside]
posted by dee lee on Oct 21, 2014 - 10 answers

Ethics involved in dating people your friend has dated casually?

Short version: what are the ethics involved in dating people your friend has dated casually? [more inside]
posted by thelivingsea on Oct 13, 2014 - 16 answers

What Do You See In This OK Cupid Profile?

I'm not looking for advice about my OKC Profile so much as I want to get your impression of what it's saying. [more inside]
posted by These Five Dollar Socks Are Green on Oct 1, 2014 - 37 answers

Oh Wise Ones...I need your OkCupid Profile Help!

Getting back in the online dating saddle, and I would love some honest critiques of my profile. In the past I haven't had much luck, but I've decided to give it another go (and yes, I'm aware of the dismal stats on black women, but I also think my profile could have been stronger). So for those of you who enjoy this sort of thing, any advice you have to offer would be fantastic. [more inside]
posted by Fiorentina97 on Sep 18, 2014 - 21 answers

But I want to let myself feel the butterflies!

Started online dating. Having trouble processing a pair of dates I recently went on with someone – surely, it wasn’t just me? [more inside]
posted by un petit cadeau on Sep 15, 2014 - 28 answers

OkCupid clinic

After years I finally did a re-haul/update of my OkCupid profile. If you enjoy this sort of thing, please help me with your wisdom. My profile. [more inside]
posted by Salamandrous on Sep 8, 2014 - 34 answers

Another "critique my OkCupid profile!" Please impart your dating wisdom.

I've linked my profile Here. I'm planning on getting better pictures, but welcome any other suggestions. [more inside]
posted by seraph9 on Aug 26, 2014 - 26 answers

How do I... do OKCupid?

Whew. Just put up my OKC profile for the first time ever! Looking for advice and some pointers. [more inside]
posted by un petit cadeau on Aug 25, 2014 - 29 answers

OkCupid code words?

I've noticed in my travels on OK Cupid that there seem to be a few code words in play on the site --- for example, mentioning the movie Secretary in the movies/books section seems to pretty consistently be a gentle hint that the person is either into BDSM themselves or at least kink friendly. It made me wonder what other key words may be out there that I'm missing out on, in case I've put them in my profile or see them in others'. What is the modern handkerchief code?
posted by maggiepolitt on Aug 12, 2014 - 34 answers

I'm really good at...Nothing?

OKCupidfilter and beyond...How do I make me seem less boring? [more inside]
posted by Soap D. Spencer on Aug 5, 2014 - 30 answers

Conceal medical cannabis use in dating profile?

Should I disclose my frequent medical marijuana use in an online dating profile? [more inside]
posted by morganw on Jul 29, 2014 - 33 answers

Gather round, OKC profile critics...

I know the topic of OKCupid profile critiques is polarizing. Those who enjoy picking apart profiles and judging photos, please bring your honesty and step on up. [more inside]
posted by justonegirl on Jun 30, 2014 - 32 answers

What is the most polite way to turn down a request for a second date?

So, I've jumped into online dating. It's going oddly better than expected, such that I now have a couple etiquette questions: 1) how do I politely turn down a request for a second date? He seems like a kind person and I'd like to avoid hurting his feelings inasmuch as possible, but I wasn't quite feeling that spark of attraction. Is there some equivalent of Miko's breakup talk for this that will help here, something clear but gentle? Also... [more inside]
posted by maggiepolitt on Jun 13, 2014 - 28 answers

Yet another OKC profile critique request

So far my response rate seems pretty low compared to I've heard is typical. Is there anything in my profile that might be the cause? [more inside]
posted by doctord on Jun 2, 2014 - 31 answers

I'll miss you till I meet you

This terrifies me a little bit...but I was wondering if you lovely people could take a look at my profile and let me know what you think of it. See anything I should improve? (I'm a woman looking to date women.) [more inside]
posted by zahava on May 16, 2014 - 30 answers

I know I'm not a supermodel, but COME ON

I used OKCupid successfully in my last city, a place in the Midwest with population 300,000. Since moving to NYC a year ago I have had the most dreadful luck with it. OKCupid profile critique and dating hand-wringing and angst inside. [more inside]
posted by unannihilated on May 16, 2014 - 102 answers

OKC Profile, n+1+n

So it's been awhile since I've used OKC, just reactivated the profile, and it's now past due for an overhaul. [more inside]
posted by Matched plain socks on May 7, 2014 - 14 answers

OkCupid: Why is my inbox not flooded and what's wrong with my pictures?

I'm a woman that just made a new OK Cupid account after a long hiatus. The amount of messages I'm getting are abysmal compared to when I was on the site six months ago. What am I doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on May 2, 2014 - 49 answers

What do I do when okcupid intersects real life?

So, I was always terrified of this happening, but then I got over it. Well, it turns out I was right- eventually, if I stay on okcupid long enough, I'm going to hit the end of single men my age in my city. [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Apr 17, 2014 - 38 answers

Let me know what you think of my OKCupid profile?

Sorry to continue the recent trend of OKCupid profile reviews, but I'd like more feedback on mine. [more inside]
posted by MeaninglessMisfortune on Apr 11, 2014 - 19 answers

OKC Profilefilter, Part n+1

I've just gotten back on OKC after a year away. Let's critique my profile! [more inside]
posted by Maecenas on Apr 10, 2014 - 44 answers

Again with the OKCupid nonsense

I'm back on OKCupid after some time spent getting my head on straight (well, bi I guess). I'd like some third party advice on my profile. Friends are ok, but they're too nice to be really helpful. [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz on Mar 31, 2014 - 52 answers

Another OkCupid profile review

Link to my OKCupid profile. I've rewritten my profile a number of times, but I'm still not that satisfied with the result. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to improve it? I'm mainly looking for casual dating, but I wouldn't rule out anything serious
posted by casebash on Mar 28, 2014 - 41 answers

Another OKCupid Profile Critique

I need some assistance in updating my okcupid profile. [more inside]
posted by cinemafiend on Mar 26, 2014 - 26 answers

Am I un-datable without a smart phone?

No, seriously. Should I buy an iPhone just to get on Tindr. And yes, I'm that desperate. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 24, 2014 - 24 answers

"Am I too wacky?" - another OkCupid profile review

Loads of "hooks", as received wisdom says is the right thing to do - but does it make me sound undateably wilfully eccentric? Profile here. Any and all feedback welcome, whether it's related to my suspected issues with the profile or not. [more inside]
posted by Junebug79 on Mar 9, 2014 - 45 answers

What should a lady write to get a date?

Men of Mefi who have ever messaged a lady on OkCupid, what specifically made you want to message her, in her profile? [more inside]
posted by stockpuppet on Feb 18, 2014 - 29 answers

Married to our jobs, but seeing each other on the side

How do I avoid shop talk on dates? [more inside]
posted by Sara C. on Jan 8, 2014 - 34 answers

Another Okcupid profile review.

Just started a new account. Maybe you guys can help me out? [more inside]
posted by MeaninglessMisfortune on Jan 4, 2014 - 22 answers

Online dating is a numbers game, so help me improve my numbers

Like most straight guys on OKCupid, I'm lucky if I get a response to one in ten messages I send. This would be fine if I could fire off several messages every day, but I'm running into writer's block. One-liners and templates don't work, and I rarely know how to compose a longer message to someone I know next to nothing about. (I'm a mumchance kind of guy; I'm terrible at small talk even with friends I've known for years.) Help stir my creative juices, tell me what kinds of messages have got your attention in the past, oh and why not critique my profile while you're at it. [more inside]
posted by zeri on Dec 18, 2013 - 45 answers

Am I doing something *wrong* in my Okcupid profile? Can I stop?

OKCupidFilter, sorry. I am getting dramatically fewer visitors and messages these past couple weeks. I haven't gotten a year older. I tried switching around pictures, editing answers, all the stuff I could think of to do. But, other than the "hey, beautiful lady, I hop ur write me back!" messages, I'm getting crickets. Here is my profile. (Please be nice, I know I'm older.) Is there something I can do to fix this? Or is it out of my hands? Thanks ever so much!
posted by The Noble Goofy Elk on Dec 17, 2013 - 46 answers

Ambiguous not-dating friendship

How should I interpret this man's behaviour? I met a guy on OkCupid. I'm confused by his behaviour and would appreciate some, any, insights from the Hive Mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 1, 2013 - 36 answers

Is you is or is you ain't a possiblity?

Having read a lot of relationship/dating AskMes, I've decided rather than wait for a relationship to fall into my lap, I should try the whole online dating thing. I am finding it rather frustrating and confusing, and hope the hive mind can help me understand it a bit better. Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by Athanassiel on Nov 9, 2013 - 19 answers

reverse cell phone number search

How to get information about a cell phone user with just the number when nothing comes up with cursory google search? [more inside]
posted by fromageball on Nov 6, 2013 - 6 answers

How am I not myself?

I've been aggressively single for a while now and I'm ready for a change. Step One: rewrite my OkCupid profile? [more inside]
posted by modernserf on Oct 10, 2013 - 20 answers

That went well, right?

Had a great first date with a woman who seems pretty busy. She cancelled our second date, asked for a rain check, and I haven't heard from her since. What's the etiquette here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 26, 2013 - 21 answers

origin of OkCupid "How is this Site Treating You?" question

Where does "How's your luck on the site?" come from? [more inside]
posted by bearette on Sep 22, 2013 - 7 answers

A friendly rejection

What's the friendliest way to decline future dates from someone you've been out with a few times but just aren't that into? [more inside]
posted by greta simone on Aug 18, 2013 - 14 answers

OKCupid filter: I need feedback for unpopular profile

Encouraged by the response to my question a few weeks ago (http://ask.metafilter.com/243294/So-many-reasons-to-keep-lovesex-out-of-my-life-Are-they-realistic), I have dusted off my OKCupid profile, but am not getting any responses. I need help! [more inside]
posted by primate moon on Jul 26, 2013 - 47 answers

Where can I meet single dads (parents) for dating?

I've been trying online dating, having been a single mom for a few years now, but I'm not finding very many single dads out there. Where are they? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jul 14, 2013 - 12 answers

Does this profile secretly spell out "I love Charles Manson"?

I am back in the dating pool and suffering from my worst response rate ever on okc. I'm willing to accept it is just luck, or maybe age, since it's been a few years since I was last here, but I am curious if there is anything that jumps out to people who don't know me. (I've run it by friends, and they think it sounds like me, but they also already know me.) [more inside]
posted by dame on Jun 30, 2013 - 36 answers

Girlfriend met a guy on dating site. This isn't settling well with me.

My girlfriend, who is lonely, used a dating site to make a "friend" which I'm having difficulty coping with. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 14, 2013 - 81 answers

Sorry OKC, I think we need to see other people

So now that IAC has ruined OKCupid what are the best alternatives? [more inside]
posted by prunes on Jun 10, 2013 - 9 answers

Loneliness and OKCupid, part 2

A few weeks ago I, a hetero male in his early 30s, asked about dating and using OKCupid with some restrictions: no kids, no religion, no alcohol being the main ones. This is a follow-up to that AskMe, but going beyond OKCupid. [more inside]
posted by moonlit walk on the sun on Jun 8, 2013 - 70 answers

Help a dating n00b?

Jumping back into the dating pool and hoping for some hacks and advice specific to finding the kind of people that interest me... [more inside]
posted by justonegirl on May 29, 2013 - 25 answers

Accidental penpals

I've just started talking to this (really neat!) guy on OKCupid; I like him a lot & we seem to have a ton in common. However, we won't be in the same place until August. How do I gently steer him away from a penpal-esque situation while still keeping him interested? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 26, 2013 - 12 answers

Dating and OKCupid as a childfree loner

I'm childfree, meaning I don't have kids and don't want them. I'm also on the far end of the loner scale. I have some questions about finding a partner and using OKCupid to do it. [more inside]
posted by moonlit walk on the sun on May 19, 2013 - 49 answers

OKCupid reality check for a new dater

I’m a late-30’s woman trying OKCupid for the first time. Can you give me general advice, some tips on keeping my expectations realistic, and suggestions to avoid getting too much of my self-esteem tied up in whether or not Random Dude responds to me? [more inside]
posted by Ms.Stocking on May 8, 2013 - 31 answers

What is OkCupid like for men?

I'm interested in the male experience when it comes to this popular dating site. [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Apr 26, 2013 - 36 answers

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