233 posts tagged with neighbors.
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Maintaining a Private Road

A few years ago I bought a house that is in a small area where there are a few houses that all share a gravel road. The road comes off the main road across my property before it reaches the other houses that use the road. I have some questions about how maintaining the road should work. [more inside]
posted by Quonab on Dec 16, 2016 - 17 answers

What face should I wear when passing by neighbors who are suing us?

Neighbors are suing us for a money grab and now I'm unsure of how to behave when seeing them. My insurance will cover the costs so only slight financial hit. Money isn't the problem but now it's so very awkward. Starts with dog and ends with fetish site pictures. [more inside]
posted by Coffeetyme on Sep 26, 2016 - 21 answers

How Neighborly Is Neighborly?

My new neighbors, whom I have only met once, seemed upset when I turned down their request that I house sit their house and pets for 12 days. I am not sure if their request or my refusal is unreasonable. Perhaps neither the request nor the refusal are unreasonable? Details follow. [more inside]
posted by WalkerWestridge on Sep 11, 2016 - 49 answers

You are so loud

My neighbors are really loud until late at night. They are loud until maybe six hours before I need to wake up. [more inside]
posted by Kalmya on Jul 10, 2016 - 9 answers

How to introduce myself to new neighbors?

My husband and I just moved into a new house a month ago, and I am hoping to meet my immediate neighbors. We live in a rural town on 7 acres, so it's not like I would ever see any of them mowing the lawn. My husband is more introverted, so I am our social coordinator. My goal is to know them, perhaps be friendly with them, but not really to open the floodgates of random drop-ins (at least until I know they are not nut jobs). [more inside]
posted by hippychick on Jul 10, 2016 - 22 answers

How to cope with overhearing venom and hate?

I overheard a very hateful conversation last night--how do you keep hateful things you've overheard from taking root and ruining your day? [more inside]
posted by bookmammal on May 22, 2016 - 13 answers

Overhearing neighbor's verbal abuse to his kids - what to do?

I live in a nice suburb of Chicago, and our house is very close to neighbors on both sides. In the summer, when windows are open, we can occasionally hear one neighbor (male, lawyer, not that it matters really) yell and swear at his young kids, such as "Don't drop the f-ing ball again!" really mean. [more inside]
posted by j810c on Apr 19, 2016 - 21 answers

How do I get my neighbors to keep their kid quiet?

Neighbor in a condo has a child that screams at all hours of the day, randomly but consistently. Any ideas on how to diplomatically address this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2016 - 22 answers

Is someone trying to poison our dog?

We're concerned that neighborhood malcontents might be trying to hurt our dog. More inside. [more inside]
posted by zeusianfog on Feb 5, 2016 - 22 answers

How do I say no to cat sitting a diabetic cat?

A neighbor I don't know very well has asked me to take care of her cats for a few days. 2 of the 7 cats require twice daily pills and/or insulin. My own cat is diabetic so I know the routine. I don't know this person very well and I have never met her cats. She is willing to pay, but it's not about the money. I just don't want the responsibility or the time commitment. I have a really hard time saying no, but I KNOW I would regret agreeing to this. What is a friendly, but honest way to decline is request? PS- I have taken care of other neighbor's cats before but they are friends and the cats are low maintenance.
posted by nevertoolate on Jan 26, 2016 - 18 answers

Help me get along with my Chinese neighbors

I live in a very diverse neighborhood - it’s probably 1/3 N-th generation white, 1/3 Chinese*, and 1/3 other recent immigrants. It’s working class, with a lot of large, packed together houses, and multi-generational housing arrangements. My husband and I (Nth-generation whites) have been having trouble interacting with our Chinese neighbors, and it’s making my husband want to move out of our neighborhood. I love our neighborhood, and would like to keep the option open to stay long term. [more inside]
posted by fermezporte on Dec 31, 2015 - 26 answers

Negotiating money with neighbors...

I recently transitioned from classroom teaching to working at home - I miss kiddo time. I offered to babysit the neighbor's kids and now I'm running into a small issue. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 30, 2015 - 8 answers

What can I do to solve this?

I live in a studio apartment with parquet flooring. The building is old for one in Toronto (~25 years), and the heating comes from pipes embedded in the ceiling of the room. The tenants right under my unit have their heat constantly turned on, which means my floor is constantly hot. Turning on my AC and two fans all the time doesn't solve the problem, and is borderline surreal as I embark on yet another Toronto winter. [more inside]
posted by omar.a on Nov 16, 2015 - 14 answers

Please Help with a Crying Baby Situation (not my baby)

Are there lots of reasons that a baby could be crying for many hours every day? [more inside]
posted by snsranch on Oct 8, 2015 - 25 answers

How to say thanks to a neighbour for putting up with our noisy weekend?

Our flooring installation this weekend was both noisier and took longer than I expected. How can we thank our downstairs neighbour for putting up with us? [more inside]
posted by area.man on Sep 22, 2015 - 16 answers

What is up with my neighbors?

My neighbors like to leave the common door open... and I had something stolen out of the vestibule. Now they won't leave the door closed. Your opinion? [more inside]
posted by Automocar on Sep 8, 2015 - 28 answers

How can I stop being annoyed by my neighbors?

I recently moved into a new apartment that shares a property with a larger house—essentially a backyard cottage, except that the apartment is in front. The family that lives in the house drives me crazy in small ways. But everything that happens has been so small that I don't know when, or if, I should say anything to them. How can I stop feeling so annoyed by them? [more inside]
posted by three_red_balloons on Aug 8, 2015 - 32 answers

Help framing request to neighbor to limit noise

We live in a fairly upscale apartment complex. I’d say that the ages in our complex range from late-20s to mid-60s ; it’s not a student-y area. The sound insulation is decent; we don’t hear a lot of everyday noise from our neighbors. Nevertheless, we’re having noise problems with our upstairs neighbors, and I’d like you’re help with fabricating reasonable requests, because I’m sleep deprived and feeling unreasonable. Venting below the fold. [more inside]
posted by Kriesa on Jul 21, 2015 - 20 answers

Passive Aggressive Notes: Snoring Edition!

This morning I woke up to a (very polite) note on my apartment door from a neighbor about my snoring. Not quite sure what action is appropriate to try and remedy the situation, or if it's my problem at all. [more inside]
posted by Alterscape on Jul 7, 2015 - 29 answers

Repointing mortar between close buildings

So I own a condo in a building built in the 30s in Chicago. It was repointed in the last few years but there is a wall that is very close to another building that was not touched and seems to have next to no mortar left in it. More inside. [more inside]
posted by mike_bling on Jun 11, 2015 - 3 answers

thoughtful gift for helpful neighbor I won't be hiring?

My neighbor, a respected local general contractor, has been generous about evaluating my house project. He's done this twice for me now, and for the second time, I'm not going to go forward. I feel guilty. What's the neighborly way to thank him for his time and let him know I'm going to use someone else? [more inside]
posted by fingersandtoes on Jun 4, 2015 - 11 answers

Maybe there's an annoying-neighbor-child version of deer repellant?

I live in the back corner of an apartment building that borders on the backyards of multiple house-neighbors on the perpendicular side street to mine. The people opposite me have elementary-age children and let them stay in the yard for hours with minimal/no supervision. The children's friends come to visit and they all get a kick out of wreaking tiny havoc directly on the other side of my apartment. I am at a loss for nipping this in the bud. Help! [more inside]
posted by cardinality on May 25, 2015 - 43 answers

Fence dispute -- did we do the right thing?

Our elderly neighbors were planning on fencing in 1300 square feet of common ground that adjoins our lot. They also wanted to put their fence about 4 feet over into our side yard. We gently tried talking to them about the potential encroachments twice. Unfortunately they were not open to moving their fence stakes even after we gave them our survey and the plat of our street showing the common ground. We had to eventually involve the neighborhood trustee in charge of fence approvals. Now they are absolutely furious about it. Did we do the right thing? How can we now deal with angry neighbors who yell at us from their car as they drive past our house? [more inside]
posted by Ostara on May 11, 2015 - 80 answers

Help me rescue my knitting from the neighbors' yard!

A knitting project I had pinned out on my roof blew down into my neighbors' walled-off backyard. I don't think he understands what happened. I want it back ASAP. What's the best and fastest way to make my intentions clear and get my project back? [more inside]
posted by ActionPopulated on Apr 3, 2015 - 33 answers

What could make a gas range reek of gasoline?

Asking for a friend: Two times in the past six months, my oven/stove and a spot near my refrigerator (several feet away) have smelled *very strongly* of some petrochemical, like benzene or kerosene or gasoline or something sweet and fuelly like that (i.e., not natural gas, not propane). There is a similar, faint, lingering odor in the oven. What could be causing this? Some kind of propellant in the gas lines? Illicit neighbor activity? If it helps, I'm on the 4th floor of a 6-floor building in NYC.
posted by unknowncommand on Feb 24, 2015 - 8 answers

How to deal with noise from upstairs neighbors?

Last week I had new neighbors move into the apartment above me. Their footsteps are very loud, occasionally there is other noise, and they are up very late. The past two nights I have gone over at midnight and asked them to keep it down. They did the first night, but last night they did not, and they were up until after 2:00 am. The woman who answered last night said it was her kids. I'm at a loss, what else can I do here? [more inside]
posted by I am the Walrus on Feb 12, 2015 - 21 answers

Neighbor's parking job is making it hard to enter/exit my garage spot

My neighbor parks his car in such a way that it often partially blocks my garage spot. I've been trying to live with it but it's getting harder and harder to maneuver around him. He's been involved in other fights over parking already, so how do I deal with this without starting a feud? Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by darkchocolatepyramid on Jan 20, 2015 - 36 answers

So there's this person who likes to hang out in my basement....

One of our neighbors in our co-op has given a friend of theirs the keys to our basement and now this friend comes and goes as if she lives here. How do I make this stop? [more inside]
posted by TryTheTilapia on Jan 20, 2015 - 32 answers

Cat drama. Must fix. Winter is coming!

A couple of weeks ago, during a raging, frigid rainstorm, a strange cat showed up on our back deck, desperate to get into the house. We kept him for the night, and in the morning discovered he belonged to our new next door neighbors. We returned him, and there was much relief and rejoicing. Then, the next night, he came back. And the next. And the next. And the next. What do we do now? Wall of text and snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by kythuen on Dec 1, 2014 - 41 answers

(Abused) neighbor child is opening my mail.

The mother has previously apologized for her 13-year-old son opening my mail. I have previously reported her to Child Protective Services, after hearing her beating him through our shared apartment wall. Today my Amazon box was completely slit open. Do I call CPS again? police? landlord? Montgomery County, MD. [more inside]
posted by ecsh on Sep 3, 2014 - 32 answers

Neighbors' dog keeps jumping their fence toward my dog.

My neighbors' dog keeps jumping their fence into the street/the sidewalk where I'm walking my dog. This happens about weekly to me (though I'm sure it must happen more), and it is scary every time. The neighbor dog doesn't bite my dog, but it does lunge at her. [more inside]
posted by superlibby on Sep 1, 2014 - 6 answers

How do I resolve a neighbor/noise issue?

My newish neighbors keep complaining about the level of noise coming from my apartment, but I'm not being loud. How do I handle this? Sensitive details in the explanation. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 12, 2014 - 24 answers


Advanced dog advice, positive feedback loop edition: Looking for advice on convincing our new rescue pup not to bark at our neighbors' even barkier dogs. [more inside]
posted by deludingmyself on Jul 6, 2014 - 10 answers

Neighbors put bushes and landscaping several feet onto my property

My neighbors, who are renters, have put lilac bushes, flowers, and landscaping several feet into my property. I've nothing against flowers and landscaping, but I would not have chosen to add this to my land in this particular configuration, and I am concerned about the idea of encroachment on my lot. How should I respond? [more inside]
posted by scrowdid on Jun 30, 2014 - 20 answers

Does Fortune really favor the Bold?

Do I have an opportunity for some killer career networking right on my doorstep? Or just the chance to be a pest? [more inside]
posted by ChickenBear on May 25, 2014 - 20 answers

What the hell are my upstairs neighbors up to?

I have been repeatedly woken at night, often for hours, by noises from the upstairs neighbors, all of which I find bewildering. For a few days I hear them drilling in their bathroom, apparently installing something. Now they wander around upstairs for hours, back and forth to the bathroom, running the water for a few minutes each time, occasionally punctuated by a brief grinding noise I would associate with a garbage disposal, but not for so long that they are disposing garbage (and how would you even get a garbage disposal in a bathroom sink anyway)? [more inside]
posted by Bunny Ultramod on May 23, 2014 - 43 answers

Neighbors and condo repair situation in Somerville, MA

My neighbor and I both live on the top floor of our condo building. He wants to fix his AC/heating system inside the shared attic, and is asking to use an attic entryway inside my apt. What can I do to protect myself in case his contractor damages my things? Please help. Thanks. [more inside]
posted by miomiomio on May 21, 2014 - 8 answers

How to share internet costs with neighbors?

I live in the one-bedroom basement apartment of a house (so there are 2 total apartments in the building). About a week ago, my soon-to-be new neighbor contacted me, said he was moving in with friends upstairs, and let me know Comcast had said they could only have one account per address (I already have Comcast wireless internet) and asked if they could share with me, offering to split the cost. He was also potentially interested in upgrading to a faster connection. I said we could chat about it after he moved in, which they have done (I've been letting them use my account the past few days). There are four people living in the apartment upstairs. Now that I've thought about it, I think splitting the cost two ways when there will be five people using it is unfair. I have one of two apartments, but it's not like I will be using half the internet. Is there something I'm not considering? How are these costs usually split when you share with neighbors? Should we be splitting it 5 ways, 2 ways, or something in between? (I also want to ask if they want to just take over the account and have me reimburse them my share, since I am moving in a few months--that's an ok thing to ask, right?)
posted by picardythird on May 4, 2014 - 36 answers

Neighbor's bass is slowly rendering my innards to gelatin - advice?

After searching, I see this has come up on Ask MeFi before in regards to apartment situations. The difference here is that we own, as do our neighbors. We live in Chicago, and naturally the police are less than responsive about these sorts of matters. I have spoken to the vibrating bass vehicle owner himself, twice, which helps for a week or so at most. I am a quiet person and a homebody - also a stay-at-home mom to a toddler and impending baby. There is literally nowhere in the house I can go to escape it when it's at max volume. [more inside]
posted by sixtyten on Apr 21, 2014 - 13 answers

Upstairs neighbors from hell + hellhounds

Upstairs neighbors with a track record of being inconsiderate got two yappy, poorly trained dogs. The dogs go out on the balcony all day, where they pee and poop through the floor slats. It all lands on our deck, where we sit and eat and grow produce. (I know, I can't believe it either). We've tried many polite but incredulous complaints, which are rapidly rising in exasperation. We've tried getting the management involved. All of this has resulted in a lot of enthusiastic apologies but absolutely no behavior change. Within a few hours the dogs are back out there, yapping and pooping on our living space. What do we do?! [more inside]
posted by you're a kitty! on Apr 2, 2014 - 26 answers

And then there's the downside of assigned parking...

My apartment building has assigned parking spaces. My parking neighbor (though not my actual neighbor in the building, for weird reasons) left a large, very noticeable scratch on my front quarterpanel last night or today, complete with paint transfer matching his vehicle. How do I resolve this in a way that feels fair to me but averts major bad blood? Snowflakes on their side of the line inside. [more inside]
posted by TwoStride on Mar 22, 2014 - 27 answers

Accurately Measuring Tree Growth.

We recently were fortunate enough to buy a house in the Berkeley Hills with panoramic Bay views of the city from the Golden Gate to the Bay bridge. Our downhill neighbor has a large beautiful redwood tree in their yard. However as beautiful as the tree is it can significantly obstruct our view if allowed to continue to grow uabated so we need a way to accurately measure its growth remotely. [more inside]
posted by bitdamaged on Feb 19, 2014 - 6 answers

How should I deal with my non-smoking neighbors?

I moved into a sixplex that several friends I have lived in. Everything is great, except my neighbors smoke despite the building being non-smoking. I typically do not notice at all unless someone is having a party and a large group is smoking. Going into the building I knew the residents smoked, even though it was against the lease. Should I go to the landlord or deal with it? [more inside]
posted by geoff. on Jan 15, 2014 - 11 answers

False noise complaints and an eviction threat

My 80-year-old grandparents live in subsidized housing in New Jersey. The neighbor in the apartment next door has been repeatedly making false noise complaints about them, saying that he can't sleep because they play the radio loudly all night (completely untrue). They were even visited by the property manager to tell them to stop. Now they've received a "notice to cease," saying that they'll be evicted if they don't stop. How can we deal with this without a lawyer? More details below. [more inside]
posted by lolichka on Jan 9, 2014 - 21 answers

How to Handle Obnoxious, Intrusive Neighbor

Every time my new neighbor sees me, he feels the need to ask me some intrusive question or make some annoying comment about what I'm doing or my habits. I feel like he's invading my privacy and he's very aggressive. How do I handle this? [more inside]
posted by OneHermit on Dec 15, 2013 - 51 answers

Should I move here?

I'm moving to a new apartment, and looking for a place that will be quiet and peaceful. I've found an apartment I like—based on the description on Craigslist, at least—and I just drove by in advance of the open house. The market where I live, in the Bay Area, is so tight right now that I'll probably have to apply immediately at the open house if I want a chance of getting it. When I drove by, I noticed that the house across the street was literally falling apart-- the roof had holes that were visible from the street, shingles were falling off, and the whole thing looked like it might eventually collapse. I saw someone go inside, so it looks like people are living there. The rest of the block looks ordinary enough. Having never lived near a place that looked so bad, I'm just wondering if there's anything I should be worried about. Other than the fact that it looks bad, and I feel bad for the people who have to live there (and for the house itself, which clearly was once very nice), does it matter that this place is across the street?
posted by three_red_balloons on Oct 18, 2013 - 10 answers

Tell Me More About Good Fences Making Good Neighbors

The fence between my neighbor's house and my house has been damaged by a tree on their side of the fence growing larger and starting to push the fence down. The fence is further weakened by the fact that my neighbor's dog (a very large German Shepherd) often jumps on it when she barks at things in my yard. For the safety of my family I want to get the fence replaced. I would like the owner of the next door property to pay for half. The problem is the property is a rental and the tenants wont give me the landlord's contact info. How can I find out who owns the property? [more inside]
posted by WalkerWestridge on Oct 6, 2013 - 16 answers

Should we stop being annoying neighbors?

Is hanging laundry in the front yard inconsiderate? How about children playing in the front yard? How about kids leaving their toys in the front yard? [more inside]
posted by mearls on Oct 3, 2013 - 98 answers

Being a responsible neighbor, DUI edition

My next door neighbor's friend drove away drunk last night (waking me up in the process -- it was not a quiet event). After making sure my neighbor was okay, I ended up just going back to bed. Now, though, I'm wondering if I should have called the cops myself, and in general how to respond appropriately to this sort of thing. I don't want to be a busybody, but I also don't want to perpetuate the "bystander effect" when I might actually be able to help! [more inside]
posted by aecorwin on Oct 3, 2013 - 23 answers

Can I find out why the FBI raided my neighbor's house?

A few weeks ago there was a pretty intense raid on my neighbor's house that involved flashbangs, the FBI, and the DEA. The whole shebang lasted about 3 hours, and although there were heavily armed and armored agents standing around in the street it clearly wasn't a "standoff" situation. Eventually all the armed people disappeared, some evidence tech type people removed some things from the house, a vehicle was towed, and a few (but not all) of the house's occupants were arrested. [more inside]
posted by raspberrE on Sep 28, 2013 - 5 answers

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