The problems are pretty standard: our next-door neighbors are a mom with four teen-age daughters who seem to thrive on conflict. Their screaming fights and door-slammings keep us awake; their response to polite requests that they not do this have been retaliation (full details inside!). The twist is that we live in a conservative suburb and we are both trans gender, so their social credibility is way higher than ours (in part because of rumors they spread), so it's hard to figure out what action we might take.
[more inside]
posted by DrMew
on May 9, 2013 -
19 answers
She has an ancient, diabetic cat that she's been trying to get rid of, offering people $150 to take him off her hands. She keeps asking me to feed him and give him insulin twice a day on weekends. She's moving out June 1.
[more inside]
posted by thrasher
on May 9, 2013 -
21 answers
My neighbor has expressed a desire to rebuild the wooden fence between our houses. We share one side of the fence with her, and it's definitely in need of repair--warped boards, aging, etc. Should she be fully responsible for paying for the fence, since it was her idea to fix it? Or should we contribute some money since we share one side of the fence?
[more inside]
posted by starkraven
on Apr 2, 2013 -
36 answers
I have a loud neighbor with a TV who lives below me. I've tried multiple things (try to ask them, tell the manager, bang on the wall) to no avail. Any other options?
[more inside]
posted by eliluong
on Feb 5, 2013 -
26 answers
A couple recently purchased a beautiful Hacienda-style home on my street. They want to tear it down and replace it with a soulless, bland, aggressively imposing mini-McMansion. Luckily, I live in a really special city with an incredibly strict design review committee. What can I do to fight them?
[more inside]
posted by acidic
on Jan 29, 2013 -
30 answers
I don't know my neighbor, but I do know she's going through a rough time. Can I anonymously help her without freaking her out?
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on Jan 25, 2013 -
49 answers
In a follow-up to
this post, our neighbor has continued giving us bottles of alcohol, among other things. We came home to find an electric cord attached from our driveway to their house, and a note explaining their PG&E was turned off...
[more inside]
posted by Mach3avelli
on Nov 13, 2012 -
58 answers
My upstairs neighbor stopped me on the street today to describe a man that she thinks is following her. She said that at various places she's been going with her son, she's seen him parked watching her. She sounded very worried. What can I do to help?
[more inside]
posted by Sreiny
on Nov 12, 2012 -
7 answers
My neighbor encroaches on our property and leaves garbage. The police haven't been particularly helpful. What to do?
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on Oct 29, 2012 -
25 answers
Friend lives in a Philadelphia row home. His neighbor's house was sealed by the DA. Neighbor broke back in & flooded the basement intentionally. The water also flooded my friend's basement and he is now concerned about potential mold problems. Neighbor does not have insurance. How should he proceed so as to both deal with potential mold & mildew before they become a problem and not cause his own homeowner's insurance to increase.
posted by davidvanb
on Sep 27, 2012 -
14 answers
I received this text from my neighbor this morning. I have owned my house for 7 years and think my neighbor should mind her own business.
[more inside]
posted by timpanogos
on Sep 3, 2012 -
74 answers
We moved in 4 days ago to a downstairs corner apartment. It's been quiet, until last night (Monday) at 1 am when the neighbor decided to play some combination of thrash metal and 90s technopop. This lasted for about 5 songs, before I went up, and in the politest way possible introduced myself, and asked if the guy could turn down the music because we couldn't sleep. And also not to hesitate to let us know any time we were too loud. He was nice enough, introduced himself, and immediately turned it down to maybe 15% of the volume it was before. Too bad that even this was too loud;
[more inside]
posted by legospaceman
on Aug 14, 2012 -
21 answers
So what's the norm for kids running around the neighborhood and playing these days? As a parent, what would you like to happen when the kid down the street knocks on your door and asks if your child can play?
[more inside]
posted by Ostara
on Jun 10, 2012 -
21 answers
My neighbors have booby trapped the wall behind my house and I'm not happy about it. Who can help me with this?
[more inside]
posted by Brocktoon
on Jun 4, 2012 -
44 answers
Neighbor is using an ultra-high-frequency device against us at very high decibels. It causes constant low-grade nausea and a long-lasting ringing in the ears afterwards. Problem is, it can't really be heard because its such a high-frequency. Cops have come to our house, felt the nausea and ear-ringing themselves, but refuse to do anything about it because they can't "hear" it and we have no way of recording it. My question is: Can you point me towards a device that can record high decibel sound in very high frequencies so we can show objectively that this is happening?
[more inside]
posted by captain cosine
on May 28, 2012 -
51 answers
Should we ask our new neighbor to lay off smoking in her bedroom, or just do our best to ignore it?
[more inside]
posted by sarcasticah
on May 21, 2012 -
26 answers
Help me think straight. I was attacked by a loose German Shepherd while out on a walk with my husband and our two small leashed dogs. What should I do next? The owner is in denial and I am concerned for the safety of myself and others. I think that if I threaten a lawsuit I could scare her into building a fence and reinforcing her door. I'm interested in getting her to take action to keep her dog enclosed or to take it to a behaviorist, not trying to win money in a settlement.
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on May 19, 2012 -
36 answers
Should I introduce myself to potential new neighbors to see if my outdoor cigarette smoking would bother them?
[more inside]
posted by Rob Rockets
on May 18, 2012 -
38 answers
Active domestic violence and emotional abuse in the unit above me... Help us brainstorm, are there other things we can do as neighbors with long ears?
[more inside]
posted by Leucistic Cuttlefish
on Apr 25, 2012 -
16 answers
I live in a downtown-Seattle high-rise apartment building, and the new neighbor is a chain smoker. It's causing serious problems. What can I do?
[more inside]
posted by Vox Nihili
on Mar 7, 2012 -
17 answers
Help my wife and I solve this minor ethical dilemma: What to do about a chair loaned by a neighbor and no longer wanted by either household?
[more inside]
posted by crabintheocean
on Feb 13, 2012 -
29 answers
What would you do if your neighbor wanted to use an unlicensed contractor to replace a shared fence? She claims this is a guy who they have used for decades and she really likes his work.
[more inside]
posted by dottiechang
on Feb 12, 2012 -
28 answers
There are a lot of previous questions about neighbour relations in apartment buildings. I'm nevertheless going to ask another one. Please tell me about top floor living in a walk up building and whether it's worth it.
[more inside]
posted by analog
on Jan 1, 2012 -
25 answers
Bad smells filter through the heating system in my building, meaning that my apartment - and by extension, me - smell like these bad smells (cigarette smoke + other). Help us both to smell like something more pleasant?
[more inside]
posted by AthenaPolias
on Nov 6, 2011 -
12 answers
My elderly neighbor lived in my rented room before I moved in. He still uses the public areas of the house as his own. What are my obligations? Lots of snowflake details inside.
[more inside]
posted by dd42
on Oct 18, 2011 -
31 answers
I have a neighbor on my block that seems to be an alcoholic. Every couple of weeks, I see him driving slowly down the block, pull into his drive way and drunkenly stumble up the stairs in the middle of the day. I don't care if he drinks all day long, but I am concerned that he drives drunk. There are lots of small children that live on our street, including mine and I don't want a drunk driving around. So far, I've only seen him coming him drunk and at that point it's too late to call the cops. I don't know him personally, so confronting him does not seem like a good idea. What can I do, short of a staking him out at the bar? I'd rather not entertain the idea of car vandalism.
posted by LemonOrange
on Oct 13, 2011 -
32 answers
What's my next move with my weird neighbor? What in the world could have possibly made him do what what he just did?
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on Sep 30, 2011 -
39 answers
Neighboring house is vacant, lawn unkempt. Would it be bad for me to mow the lawn and trim the hedges?
[more inside]
posted by Lokheed
on Aug 25, 2011 -
29 answers
Cat adoption filter: should we take in a young feral who seems to have adopted us, or should we find a different kitten to bring into our home? Complicating details inside. Bit of a novella, apologies in advance for the length.
[more inside]
posted by Scientist
on Jul 6, 2011 -
56 answers
My family (husband and 2 toddlers) lives in a town home and noise from our place is a constant concern of mine. We recently upgraded to a four bedroom that was occupied by a little old lady for quite a number of years. The ladies who live on either side of us seem to be very nice, but our second weekend into the new place we had one come over and ask us to quiet down.
[more inside]
posted by Sweetmag
on Jun 17, 2011 -
31 answers
Neighbor behavior filter: I hear my neighbor's baby (definitely a baby) crying. I hear the sound of a man yelling things like "shut up" or "stop crying". And then I hear the sound of a smack. This makes me feel horrified. But is it any of my business to try to help?
[more inside]
posted by your mom's a sock puppet
on May 25, 2011 -
40 answers
My downstairs neighbor just told me he's been finding itchy bites on his legs, which he and his doctor believe are from bedbugs. What now?
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on May 17, 2011 -
15 answers
I am moving in to a new apartment, and have discovered that my across the hall neighbor is kind of loud. The noise seems to be carrying through the air conditioner vent. Is there anything I can do to muffle this?
[more inside]
posted by Sara Anne
on May 5, 2011 -
10 answers
My boyfriend's across-the-hall neighbor loves to talk on his CB radio at all hours. We don't love hearing it through every speaker in the apartment. What can we do?
[more inside]
posted by Captain Cardanthian!
on Feb 22, 2011 -
14 answers
The Super and his family in the apartment next door are way too loud. Three kids in a one bedroom, running, screaming, jumping. The apartment and his salary is paid for by the coop.
What recourse as an owner/share holder in my coop do I have?
[more inside]
posted by ranunculus
on Feb 22, 2011 -
2 answers
Before putting an offer in on a house, we want to spend some time this week sitting in the neighborhood and talking with neighbors to see what the area is like and start creating some rapport. What questions should we ask the neighbors?
[more inside]
posted by rhapsodie
on Dec 7, 2010 -
12 answers
Just how dangerous are the Hell's Angels these days? That is, how dangerous to live next to?
[more inside]
posted by anonymous
on Nov 18, 2010 -
34 answers
I am having a conflict about noise with my downstairs neighbor, and he has agreed to meet. What talking points should I bring up, how should I start this conversation, and what kinds of body language can I practice to make it effective?
[more inside]
posted by juniperesque
on Nov 15, 2010 -
48 answers