Has anyone ever made a mistake that they just can't stop replaying over and over in their head? I think that I accept the mistakes that I made and the decisions that led up to it, but I keep thinking why in the world did I have to do what I did. Every day I get up and I am thinking about the past. I made a mistake that was so big that it has permanently jeopardized my future. It's been almost two years since this problem first appeared. Some things have improved since that time but other things have gotten much worse. On a scale of 1 - 10 as far as big fuck ups go, this one would be about an 11. How do you process something like this and live with it so that you're not constantly thinking about it?
It is said that "There are no mistakes, only opportunities". My mind is blown by kintsugi, the art of repairing ceramics using precious metals so that the repaired piece is arguably more beautiful than the original. Are there more things like this? [more inside]
Due to reasons that don't matter, I did not pay my college tuition from my first college at the time. In October I paid off the entire $9000 balance at once. I am filling out rental applications (going to grad school). Do I mention in the additional information why I likely have a sucky credit score (I do not know my score, I know it's on my report though)? Or do I not draw anymore attention to it and just hope beyond hope?
What have you been wrong about, realized it, and it changed your life? I remember reading Albert Ellis' wonderful self-help book A Guide to Rational Living where he gives a great list of irrational and self-defeating beliefs that people have. Among these beliefs was the importance people placed on other's opinion of them as well the emphasis people placed on being perfectionistic in their own lives. Much of this underlies Cognitive Behavioral Therapy but the effect is even more prevalent than that. We all have had beliefs that have held us back, and I'm curious as to what things you once believed that were holding you back in your personal or professional life. Anything will do. It can be anything from knowing the importance of making good first impressions to the need for keeping oneself physically fit even when one doesn't want to. I'm looking to see whether I share of any of these traits or not. So what are the beliefs that have held you back or others that you know?
I strongly believe that every human endeavor has a few canonical newbie mistakes. In machine shops it's ignoring the kerf. In many dances it's excessive flourishing. When you first started dating in your twenties, what mistakes did you make? Now that you have had some experience with (preferably stable, happy) relationships, what advice would you like to go back and give yourself? I would much rather learn from your mistakes than make them all myself. [more inside]
How do I recover from my mistakes and rough start in work life? [more inside]
I worry that I make an abnormally large amount of mistakes at work. How often is "normal" to make mistakes? [more inside]
I am very dissatisfied with my career trajectory (it may be laughable to even call it that) and I’m wondering if it is because I am doing something that I really have no aptitude for. Is there really such a thing as an "error-free" proofreader? [more inside]
How frequently do you screw up at work? I'm wondering if it's "normal" to screw up at work with the frequency that I am, and I should cut myself some slack. Alternately, I'm considering the possibility that it's a big problem. [more inside]
Anybody have any experience with needing to come to a fresh start? [more inside]
Relationship fall-out: How do you deal with knowing that the person's friends hate you for how you've hurt them? [more inside]
How do normal, happy couples support each other in a non-dysfunctional, healthy relationship? Not surprisingly, longish snowflake details inside. [more inside]
Think I can solve this privacy issue of mine? If not, what to do if I'm "discovered"? [more inside]
How can I reduce my margin of error on the job? [more inside]
Moving in with my SO - but worried that I'll end up in the unhappy situation my parents were in. What do you do when you didn't grow up with a positive example of marriage/co-habitation? [more inside]
I am making stupid mistakes at work and I need a strategy to help myself overcome them. Sorry for the length. [more inside]
A printout was inadvertently glued to a copy of a historical photo. How do I get it off? [more inside]
You procrastinate. You're disorganized. You make multiple careless mistakes weekly. How did you go from being a Bad Employee to a good one who actually contributes positively to your organization? [more inside]
Was reading about microchips that are designed to allow a few mistakes (known as 'Sloppy Chips'), and pondering equivalent kinds of 'coding' errors and entropy in biological systems. Can a fair comparison be made between the two? [more inside]
It would seem that I've f'd up, big time. Now what? How do you move forward when you're fairly sure you've made a bad decision and can't turn back. (details inside) [more inside]
Workers at this one convenience store always charge slightly more than the stated price. What is the scam here? [more inside]
We had a recent thread on things really poor people do when they come into some money, and now I'm curious whether there are analogous mistakes at every level of society. What sort of mistakes would be made by, say, a poor college student taking his first office job, by a middle-class man marrying into old money, by shoestring startup folk after a successful IPO/buyout? I'm interested in particular in sharp transitions, rather than, say, slowly climbing from the mail room to the board room over the course of a lifetime.
The guy I am dating has unusual tendencies, is this a part of his ADD? Or his quirkiness? How should I approach the subject? [more inside]
I've screwed things up and it is finally catching up with me. My job situation is not good and my future is looking bleak. I know that it's my own fault. I need to fix it but I have no idea where to start. [more inside]
I have a serious problem with being seen to be intellectually 'wrong'. I need ways to get over it [more inside]
If I have made a mistake at work (or in general), I am much, much more likely to make another mistake soon afterwards. How can I get focused and correct a problem without making yet more mistakes? [more inside]
After growing up in a VERY authoritarian family environment, I lack a sense of proportion when it comes to when I've really screwed up bad. I'm in therapy but would like some further advice. [more inside]
Are grammatical errors more frequent in English than in other languages? What about spelling? Do foreign language have as many substitution errors as English? Do ewe speak a pear of foreign languages or more and what are you're experiences of these kinds of errors? Watt do there grammar Nazis do? [more inside]
I'm a computer science and biochem major about to start a software development internship at a high-frequency trading firm. What are the classic mistakes you see inexperienced geeks make in a professional environment, especially a financial-sector/"business" place, and how can I avoid them? What can I do this summer to impress my supervisors and maybe get my foot in the door for a full-time job after graduation? [more inside]
What is it called when you make a mistake because you are thinking faster than you can speak/type/etc.? [more inside]
When you make a real mistake, how do you deal with it? How do you deal with yourself and keep from feeling super guilty? [more inside]
Yesterday, my girlfriend of two years bought a puppy that, due to circumstances, she really shouldn't have. What now? [more inside]
A book I edited shipped with significant errors because of my negligence. How bad is it? [more inside]
When is an individual most likely to make a serious mistake (say, on the job or at some task involving risk)? I recall research that suggesting a "seven year rule" that after seven years of doing something, one has acquired enough mastery over the job or task or skill that complacence begins to creep in -- and with it, vigilance drops and disaster ensues. Any leads much appreciated.
Will my credit ever recover? I was trying to do better.. got a job, paid on time.. But I got rejected for a credit line increase today. Mind you, my current limit is already only $300! [more inside]
What are some good examples of failing to learn from history? [more inside]
How do you increase serendipity? [more inside]
I'm making a certain type of typo more and more frequently. Should I be worried? [more inside]
What to do (if anything) about a kid (Kindergarten) who cannot deal with failure/losing? [more inside]
A few months ago I saw an article that listed 900+ mistakes that Fox News had made over the previous year. I thought I saw it on Mefi but I have looked everywhere and can not find it. Any help would be appreciated.
My W-2 says I paid taxes to both Indiana and California. However, I did not live or work in Indiana at any time during the year 2007. How do I go about getting this fixed? [more inside]
I'm a native speaker of English but I pronounce some words incorrectly. What other words am I pronouncing wrong? [more inside]
I don't use blogger, but I post comments on a blog that does. I happen to run my own blog (impressed?), which I used to link through Blogger's "URL" field. Apparently Google has removed that field from the commenting form. Instead it goes to my "Blogger Profile" which of course is empty, and even if were full, it still couldn't link to my self-hosted blog. What is Google thinking? Anyhow, is OpenID my friend?
How can I cope when I make mistakes? I'm starting to feel I'm failing in my career, and am very isolated. Warning - long. [more inside]
I did something effed up and now I'm paying for it. [more inside]
Is there anything one can do to fight a medical bill that appears to be incorrect? I visited the emergency room last fall. I paid a $100 copay at the time of service that appears to have never been applied to my bill. Despite several calls to the ostensible hospital billing office (really a cube-farm in Texas) pointing out some discrepancies, they've left the clock ticking, sent threatening notices, and are apparently determined to slash my credit rating if I don't pay *now*. What can I do? [more inside]
Why are large format photographers in movies always depicted under the darkcloth while exposing the picture?
I have many memories of people in movies, cartoons, etc. who while taking a photograph with a view camera remained underneath the darkcloth while making the exposure. However, the film holder should be cutting off the light to the groundglass and therefore they shouldn't be able to see any image. Is this just due to the ignorance of the movie makers or is there some reason why they are depicted this way?
Can anyone provide an example in which an author creates a work that is later shown to have an fairly obvious flaw or factual error, that the author eventually acknowledges? I'm more specifically looking for the author's reaction, reply or excuse when presented with this error. The older, the better.
I'm proofreading an OCR file of a 25-year-old book, and after I fixed it up the company (whose history it is) said I had to put back in all the original (non-OCR) mistakes (words spelled wrong, incorrect tenses, text inconsistencies, semicolons used miserably) for copyright reasons. I told them it's their copyright, and they can do whatever they want with it. No, they say, it's a historical record. It's also their money, so I'll do whatever they want . . . but are they right? Are misspelled words and poor punctuation a copyright issue? [more inside]