Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with men

Name That Book!

notcomputersavvy06 — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:00:24 -0800

Another "what book is this" query relating to a sci-fi book from the late 80s/early 90s concerning a society wherein the sexes live in different compounds and the males engage in ultra-violent rituals and war-type activities. My memory is quite hazy but the book made a impression on me when I read it sometime in the late 80s/early 90s. It was a sci-fi book set in some alternate reality wherein the men and women live separately except for a certain segment of "neutered" men who live with the women and help raise the children. All male children are turned over to the male compound at a certain age and have to go through a series of violent coming of age rituals which determine whether they will stay in the male compound or return, disgraced, to live with the women. As is revealed later, the women have engineered this arrangement so that violence is gradually "bred" out of society because it's not the aggressive men in the compound impregnating the women, but the peaceful "neutered" males who live with the women.

Should women expect men to cheat on them?

starpoint — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 23:01:32 -0800

I'm 27 and single. I've never had a serious boyfriend. Just throwing that out there. My brother is 24. Our 1st cousins are visiting for Christmas. One of them is male and 19, the other is female and 16. Tonight we somehow got into a huge discussion about relationships. Basically my brother and cousin (the 19-year-old) were making the following points: 1. Guys NEED to have sex with multiple women (my brother equated it with the desire to pee).

2. Just because a guy has sex with other women outside a relationship or marriage, it doesn't mean he loves his girlfriend (or wife) any less.

3. Men are living against their biological nature in Western Society. The natural order is for men to sleep with as many women as possible to spread his seed, not to stick with just one woman his whole life.

4. Continuing with Point #3, in many non-Western societies, men have multiple wives and those women don't have a problem with it; and are happy living in a harem where they are taken care of. Western women have been programmed to believe that a man will only stay with them.

5. The natural order of women is that women don't care if men sleep with other women. If they do care, then it's because the women have been programmed to think so.

6. Men are made better when they have multiple partners. E.g., they have to stay "oiled" or they become less desirable in general.

7. EVERY man will cheat on his wife or girlfriend at some point. Or if he doesn't, he will want to.

8. It's NOT OK for a woman to sleep with another man because biologically her husband or boyfriend sees her as his property and doesn't want to lose an opportunity to spread his seed (even if he has 30 other women).

9. The emotional connection women have toward men during a relationship (and men toward women) is just a temporary infatuation thing and is designed for men to stick around long enough to protect the woman while she's pregnant. Then the man is free to move on to someone else because a pregnant woman can't give him the sex he needs.

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Of these points I do agree with the biological aspects -- women are choosier because they can only produce so many offspring; and so men need to be ready at all times so that there are "seeds" around when a woman is ready to have a baby. Nothing new there.

Otherwise I'm not sure how much I agree with many of these points.

What bothered me is the sheer arrogance of the way in which my brother and cousin presented their arguments -- as though everything men want is rational and biological, and what women want is "temporary" or the result of "programming." It's fine for a man to sleep around but not for a woman to do the same? My cousin also said that I will never meet a man that will not cheat on me. Gee, thanks. I pointed out some friends of mine who are happily married, and they just brushed those away saying that those guys are either nerdy "Beta-men" or that they could be cheating, too.

I don't know what to think. Maybe I'm living in a fantasy world. Maybe this is a reality check. There is some element of truth in what they said, but it bothers me nonetheless. I am hoping to meet a guy who is the ying to my yang and we support each other and are faithful to one another. I would not want him to sleep with other women, and I wouldn't sleep with other men. Of course we may find other people attractive, but is it so much to ask for a lifetime commitment to one person? Should I expect him to cheat behind my back? Is that just "the way it is"? My brother, cousins and I couldn't reach a compromise except, "ask nothing, tell nothing."

My brother said he's talked to many men -- professors, pilots, business men, etc., who have all supposedly cheated on their wives. I'm not trying to portray my brother and cousin as bad people. They're not bad people, but they are both a bit arrogant. But at least they're honest (with me, anyway).

I couldn't think of any good counter-arguments during our discussion. I enjoy debate but I'm not good at it when it's sudden and I haven't had a chance to prepare. I understand that my brother is a guy and he has needs, but what about women's needs? Why are women's needs less important? I don't want to be wife #19. Is that so much to ask? Is it unrealistic? When I pursue relationships, should I expect the guy to cheat? Should I bring it up with him before we even start to go steady? What are ways a guy can handle his desire to be with multiple women in a long-term relationship?

I don't want to be such a bitch

Anonymous — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 11:34:10 -0800

I have come to realize that I have a hard time empathizing with men, and it’s making it very hard to even begin to look for a satisfying male relationship, romantic or otherwise. 22-year-old college female. At school I pretty much only ever had female friends, and in fact I can’t say I’ve ever had a real male friend (if you don’t count my ex-boyfriend.) I’ve had male acquaintances, more in the past few years (college) than before. But I have never been close to any men except my dad and my ex-boyfriend.

My dad always told me to be wary of men, because they will lie to you and exploit you for sex and then break your heart. I guess my dad was trying to protect me, but hearing that message about men from the only man I knew well convinced me that it was true. And I’m still convinced, despite knowing just how hosed up that attitude is.

I had the great fortune to meet a very nice guy three years ago, right when I began dating. (I avoided it for years out of fear of being used.) We talked all night when we met, dated for years, it was good and we talked and understood each other mostly, and then it ended for many reasons and whatever, no fuckedupness there. But since then I’ve realized that, with the exception of him, I have never understood any man I know. I think of all men as stereotypes. I think they are fundamentally different from me, with a different outlook and different interests. I think they all like video games and South Park and never want to have kids and aren’t vain and don’t feel things and live in squalor and all kinds of stupid sexist bullshit. I think they see me the same way I see them, and although I desperately want to make a connection with a man like I had with my ex, I feel like it’s not even fair to try because, with my current level of empathy, I treat men like poo poo. (My school/life situation right now makes it so that 80% of the people I interact with every day are female, which makes it even harder to figure out how to make a connection.)

After the breakup I slept with two men. One three weeks after, one three months after that. Both times went exactly the same: I slept with him as soon as I could see he liked me, then dumped him the next day or so when I realized I didn’t like HIM. And both times I was surprised that they were hurt by it, because "men don't take sex seriously."

As you can see, I have no idea how to form a satisfying relationship. It’s like I think of guys as nothing but tools to use to validate myself, and then when I do I become so disgusted. I WANT to have male friends, I like hanging out with guys even on a non-relationship level, but it’s only ever been friends of friends and it never goes beyond chatting because… well, I have no idea. I don’t know a single man I can call a friend, yet all my girlfriends have plenty. And I’ve met them and hung out with them and yet here I am. I know where I got these ideas from but not how to make them go away. It’s bizarre and gross and dehumanizing and I need it to stop.

21st century Darcy

thinkingwoman — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 15:30:20 -0800

BookRecommendationFilter: I'm looking for the Jane Austen of the modern man. So, I just realized that the protagonists of the past couple dozen books or so that I've read have either been female, or male but living in extraordinary circumstances (spies, psychopaths, detectives, World War II). Is anyone writing books about regular guys anymore?

Basically I am looking for a well-developed, insightfully written main male character living in ordinary Western society during the late-20th/21st century. The only idea I have is Nick Hornby, maybe Joseph O'Neill's "Netherland" or Tom Piazza's "City of Refuge".

I know there's more out there. What else?

But what's it there for? Do you actually sleep on it?

lunalaguna — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 08:37:30 -0800

Little known facts about men My boyfriend was shocked (shocked!) recently when I told him that many women's bathrooms have couches or chairs in them. I was surprised no one had ever told him this before, or that he'd never been in a women's bathroom. (I've had jobs where I've cleaned men's bathrooms, so that world is no secret to me.)

It got me wondering whether there are certain facts about men or common experiences they have that I'm totally unaware of as a woman. Guys, are there things you encounter pretty regularly that a women would know nothing about? Girls, have you ever learned something about men that's both common and surprising?

Why do male porn stars wear socks and shoes?

skylar — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 08:27:01 -0800

Why do male porn actors so often wear socks and shoes while otherwise naked in adult movies? It's true that high heels are prevalent among the females but at least one could argue there's some aesthetic point to that. The guys' choice of footwear, meanwhile, is nearly always awful. Is there a practical or cultural reason for the men wearing socks, shoes and sometimes hats and sunglasses?

I'm right, but lack visual evidence of my rightness

B-squared — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 12:45:07 -0800

Help me find images of handsome, manly men in white sweaters. I'm trying to convince my husband that a white sweater is as versatile as his dour browns, blacks and grays. If they are layered with shirts under or jackets over, all the better. Thank you!

Shampoo Causing Acne

Anonymous — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 21:23:30 -0800

I think I self-diagnosed that my shampoo has been causing minor to moderate acne on my forehead and near my front hair line for sometime. Should I substantially reduce my shampoo usage (and not smell as nice), or are there more natural shampoos I should experiment with? I am a man with short hair. I am a late 20's man with usually 1" to 2" hair on my head, pretty thick hair overall.

This past spring, from reading several older (and insightful) responses on Ask MeFi, I became enlightened that perhaps shampoo wasn't totally necessary as a daily part of my routine, and started experimenting doing it less and less. At first, I started doing it every other day, and ultimately decreased to about twice a week for most of the time, in total for about six months.

Not only did I notice the intended improved results in hair styling (and more naturally feeling hair), but unexpectedly I noticed a substantial reduction if not almost elimination of what had been persistent minor (and at times moderate) acne on my forehead and front hairline.

A couple months ago, I started dating someone, and inadvertently started shampooing much more often to smell better. After a few weeks, I started breaking out again and this has sort of continued for 6 weeks. Obviously there are other variables at play here like the hormones of a relationship, modified diet and exercising more, but I have a gut feeling I am on to something with the shampoo.

The shampoo I have been using for years is Head & Shoulders 2 in 1 dandruff shampoo + conditioner, varying scents but usually Ocean Lift. In my teenage years, I had moderate dandruff, and so I have always just used dandruff shampoo even though I am not sure if it is still an issue for me (the shampoo has always been effective against dandruff).

So, questions are:

Should I go back to my twice a week shampooing schedule (or stop entirely)? Ladies, do men experience hair smell issues with this? Are there other effective non-shampoo methods of adding a scent to one's hair?

Is there another shampoo I should be trying that might be more natural? I wonder if my acne is more of a reaction to the over-production of my hair's oils from the constant shampoo stripping rather than it is a reaction to a particular chemical in the shampoo.

Should I be trying just shampoo, with no conditioner?

Also, for people who don't shampoo or shampoo infrequently, what is the rule with pool swimming--is that a situation that one would shampoo after no matter what to purge the chlorine?

If love is a battlefield, have I become a conscious objector?

Anonymous — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 15:34:34 -0800

Heterosexual male in his early 30s after a long-term relationship finds himself not really interested in the opposite sex. Is this normal? Some Background: It's been about a year since amicably ending a 10+ year relationship[1]. I decided to do the 'smart thing' and not rush into dating or random one night standards, which I managed to keep to, other than 6 months ago I had a small fling with a female friend[2] (who I have known for a few years) that lives in another country. Barring that, in the past year, I've found myself not really 'interested' in women, dating or nsa-wise.

I'm still sexually attracted to women, I've not suddenly become sexually attracted to men. I do miss having sex, but every women I've met since the relationship ended just doesn't seem to 'pique my interest', so to speak. I've meet some beautiful, smart and funny women in the past year, but all of them just don't interest me in anyway more than friends or acquaintances.

My friends have tried to 'hook me up' with ladies from time to time, usually ending in semi-disaster usually caused by me not being interested and sometimes complete oblivious. While it all makes for funny stories at the pub, they are[3], as am I, starting to wonder what is going on.

I am happy going through life right now as things are, my work is great, challenging and feels really fulfilling. I don't pine for someone/anyone to be with me. But I do wonder, is this a normal reaction for most people out of a long term relationship to go through?
Questions can be asked at throwaway email account (thatyarrthere[a-t]googlemail.com) if required.

1. We have no intention of getting back together. Nor am I in a desperate search to find her exact replacement.
2. While we enjoy each others company, neither of us are interested in a long distance relationship.
3. They aren't pressuring me to get back in the 'game'. They are just being good friends and are 'concerned'.

He's not refusing to be a man. What to do, what to do.

ellehumour — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 18:32:30 -0800

difficult gift shopping filter: Help me find books, toys, comics, music, etc that provide a broad, varying, and largely non-traditional view of masculinity for my little brother, who is absolutely nothing like me or anyone else in our family. More details than necessary inside! My twelve-year-old brother is the only boy in his immediate family. He has two sisters, two mothers, two former foster-mothers who are still part of his life, a biological grandmother, and an occasionally-present-but-mostly-absent biological mother. Bio-dad is not in the picture; adoptive uncles are in the American midwest, thousands of miles away and across a border. As far as friends and non-family-influences go, he lives in a very small town which some might classify as "hick" - if it's anything like how it was when I was growing up there (many years ago now - there is an eleven-year age gap between me and my brother), the vast majority of his peers are the children of dyed-in-the-wool rednecks, and well on the way to becoming dyed-in-the-wool rednecks themselves.

All the women in his life are very strong feminists, which is great in that (unlike his redneck-to-be peers) he respects women, but not so great in that he doesn't really have a lot of male role models to look up to, and as such, he tends to latch on to popular representations of masculinity and emulate them with great zeal.

He plays soccer, football, and hockey. He's in the boy scouts. He wants to join the military when he grows up. He's very nationalistic. He eats meat (I was raised vegetarian in that same household). I thought I had become the black sheep of the family by eschewing university to become an activist and artist, but this kid has me beat for that position by going in the exact opposite direction.

I'm not super-concerned - my mother, while supportive of his interests, is terrified that he'll get hurt playing violent sports and/or turn into some kind of adolescent fascist, but I figure it's probably just a phase, as he tries to figure out what his identity is as a guy in a very female-oriented environment. Nevertheless, in doing my (early-ass, I know) Christmas shopping, it occurred to me that it might help to present him with some alternate expressions and interpretations of masculinity - feminine boys, pacifist boys, queer boys, disabled boys, boys opposed to sexism, racism, etc as, well, boys. Boys who don't act like the boys and men on TV and in most mainstream comic books and novels. Men who take the expression of their masculinity beyond that of your average mainstream rock band.

Twelve years old is too young for Propagandhi's Less Talk, More Rock and too old for children's books with simple messages like Free To Be You And Me. As a kid, I systematically sought out and (figuratively) devoured books, movies and comics that featured heroines who were strong, firm in their convictions, capable, and cast off traditional womens' roles - what are some similar works of fiction, but for boys? Where is the Le Tigre of the adolescent boys' world? Where is the sequel to The Practical Princess - a book called The Prince Who Was Secure in His Masculinity, Comfortable With His Sexuality, And Empowered His Subjects By Treating Them All With Dignity?

Show me the way, Hive Mind. Help me help a twelve year old boy in a small town help himself.

Apologies if this ran a bit long. I am pedantic.

Resources on herbivore men?

parmanparman — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:07:39 -0800

What are the best online or print resources in English language about lifestyle and individuality of soshoku-danshi (grass-eating/herbivore men)? Not looking for news articles, thanks!

Best Hair Product for Men

jameslavelle3 — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 20:02:47 -0800

Men with short hair: what hair product do you use to style your hair on a daily basis, if any? Also, I am looking for high quality hair product that has a decent hold and is as non-flaky and non-greasy as possible. Cost is not a concern. In the past, gel has worked for best for me but I am open to new ideas.

Can't I have my cake...?

Anonymous — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:17:15 -0800

Would it even be possible to pursue a friendship, or a good idea, for that matter? So my dog had to go to a specialist, so I took her to the hospital at the university where I am a student (grad). The resident that took care of my dog was amazing, and he really intrigues me as a person. He is 37, and I am 35. Here's my dilemma. I am in a relationship, and very happy with my partner. But I can't deny that I am attracted to this guy. I would very much like to be friends, but I don't know 1) if he is interested in that and 2) if guys at that age are interesting in even having female friends (who knows if it would be something else down the road a piece...).

I am completely clueless as to when guys are hitting on me, and there were a couple of instances that make me think that he was, but they are also fairly ambiguous. The first was when I was leaving after the consultation. I shook his hand, and he said that where he is from, it is rude to shake hands goodbye, and better to hug and give a kiss on each cheek. Culturally true, but I wasn't sure if he did that with all of his clients. So...maybe, maybe not.

The second was when I was visiting my dog. He was taking her back to her kennel, and he apologized for not being able to hug or shake my hand. In general, he is really touchy and flirty with me, which may just be his personality.

The other thing (and again, I realize that I may be totally overthinking, so please be kind), was that when he called me to update me on my dog, he called from his personal cell phone. Usually these calls are made on a hospital phone, and the number is scrambled.

So is there a way I can suggest friendship? Is it a bad idea? Guys, are you ok with your SO having male friends? Is it better to let sleeping dogs lie? Should I friend him on Facebook or something? Or am I just overthinking the whole thing? Again, I realize that this may be totally one sided. Any thoughts? Throwaway if needed is anonanswer@gmail.com. Thanks!

Interesting Men's Shoes

OmieWise — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 13:07:13 -0800

Can you recommend interesting men's shoe makers? I really (really!) like a lot of Cydwoq shoes, and some Fluevog's. I dislike shoes styled after athletic shoes or old track spikes. I'm most interested in learning about high style, relatively unusual shoes. They can be dress or casual. Because Camper has moved their line to mostly mimic track shoes, there are very few models I like anymore. I'm not a fan of simple, Mephisto, or Born.

(No offense intended, these brands just get trotted out a lot when people talk about men's shoes.)

I've read the other questions on AskMe related to this topic.

Thanks.

Lots of men would like to have fun in Paris

einekleine — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 17:21:57 -0800

Paris help: I am organising a weekend for a group of men in Paris in mid October. We're arriving Friday night, staying at a hostel on rue Mouffetard, doing some activities on the Saturday and heading home Sunday night. I need some advice on locations... and activities... and everything... This is long, because I'm worried, apologies. Any help is much appreciated, a few previous threads have come up with some great suggestions but none cover this. Chiefly because there's 17 men. I'm concerned about the amount of men. But they are all knowing, stylish and easy, aged 22 - 34, typically 30. Good men.

Primarily we want to keep costs down, especially the price of alcohol, which we will consume in the enthusiastic manner that a group of 17 men are inclined to on a weekend jaunt.

First of all, I hope I've got the hostel location right: rue Mouffetard in the Latin Quarter. If any people think this is an absolute disaster, do say, as it can be changed. The plan is to leave the hostel to sample the delights of the Parisian night at around 11pm on Friday night. We want a number of bars to go to first, then a nightclub, or even better, a lively rambunctious late license thrill parlour with plenty of life, character and women. Does such a group of places exist within sensible distance (preferably wandering distance) of the rue Mouffetard? Is there a noted (cheap) bar where the said group of men could 'settle in'? Would getting late night/early morning food on the Rue de la Huchette work?

Saturday we're doing stuff in the day (does anyone have any experience of the petanque courts in the Jardin du Luxembourg? Do you just turn up?). In the evening we're going to a burlesque at the Bobino in Montparnasse. That starts at 9.30, so we need somewhere to eat beforehand, somewhere that's nearby, fun and can accommodate 17 men (I realise I should have booked this already)! Then after that we'd like to go out again in Montparnasse, and would love some recommendations, or better yet, a street or route to visit. Again, we need to watch the price of beer and wine and would like to watch that price with pretty women (I know that's close to impossible).

Finally, with such a large group of men, any advice on getting in places? Does it make sense to contact bars in advance. I would love to have a cocktail in the Curio Parlour for example, but would we get in? Maybe before 9pm on the Saturday?

Sunday we were planning on grabbing some food and having a picnic in a park: any advice on which park?

Also any kind relaxing words of 'it will all go fine' gladly taken. I know it sounds like a terrible, hungry descent, but really we're all rather nice, promise. If I'm asking the impossible by being too specific, then please advise alternatives, thank you!

I need help locating an article about how single men are more successful than married men.

myodometer — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 22:08:41 -0800

Looking for an article regarding the fact that single men are responsible for more social breakthroughs than are married men/fathers. Several months (possibly a couple years) ago, I remember reading an article regarding a study that determined that single men are responsible for more breakthroughs in the science world (for example) than are married men. The article outlined the how and why of these results. I believe it possibly also mentioned the health-boosting effects of long-term relationships over the health-diminishing nature of the bachelor lifestyle.

However, my Google-fu skills have failed me in locating this article again. Anyone out there know what I'm talking about?

"Soft in some places, lumpy in others. It's ghoulish. You are a ghoul."

The Whelk — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 06:24:51 -0800

My Disgusting Body And You: For reasons I can't divulge, I will be appearing nude in public come November. What can I do in a month so I look my naked best? I don't have a gym and really can't afford one, and my time is going to be pretty tight for the first two weeks in October... 1- I'm a 25 year old 220 pound dude shaped like Judah Friedlander.

2- I kinda went to hell this summer for work and other reasons. I'm pale, my upper body strength is shot completely and my clothes are starting to rebel. My motivation to move around has been nil, hence doing the nude thing to force myself to do something.

3- I already eat pretty well, not a whole lot of processed food and lots of veggies. More than willing to cut out the big things like beer and bread and fried foods. My problem is that I'm never hungry. Ever. I eat maybe one meal a day. Everyone says you have to eat little meals to up your metabolism but I just can't force myself to eat that much.

4- As I said before, no gym, but a big empty floor and 2 ten pound weights. Also, cause of the money situation, I can't do classes or anything that costs money.

5- Anything else I should be doing Right Now to ensure I look Super Great Naked in a month? Start scrubbing off the foot calluses or full body moisturizing or what?

Describing a dress shirt.

phrontist — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 02:25:31 -0800

I'm sartorially clueless. How would you describe this kind of shirt? It's a "dress shirt", sure, but how would you specify the fabric and cut (particularly that type of collar)? Here is another example. I'm looking to buy some shirts like these but when I go to department stores I can only find this sort of thing - which is cut completely differently and uses an extremely thin fabric. Help me articulate the differences.

Unique men's clothing resale in Manhattan or Brooklyn?

4midori — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 22:01:16 -0800

Recommend unique, affordable men's clothing resale stores in Manhattan or Brooklyn? Hipster ok, or vintage. I'm looking mainly for short- and long-sleeve collared shirts.

Hot for Grandma?

Bardolph — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 08:32:55 -0800

How do men's patterns of sexual attraction change as they age? That is, are older guys really attracted to older partners, or are they just being polite/settling for what they can get? Mostly just curious, but I've always been puzzled by the contradictory info one gets on sexuality and aging. On the one hand, related things like sexual orientation/fetishes don't magically change over the years, and since desire patterns are probably hardwired during adolescence, why would someone who's turned on by hot 20-year-olds at age 20 suddenly change that at age 40?

On the other hand, plenty of men seem to have active sexual relationships with their contemporaries well into old age-- the same guys who, presumably, would at age 20 have been horrified by the idea of sex with a 60+-year-old.

Obviously there'll be lots of individual variation, but I'm wondering-- what gives? Is it really common for men's fantasies to age as they age? Do older guys genuinely get turned on by/ desire the older women they sleep with, or is there some creative imaginative work going on to get them through the act? (Not asking about women because I am one, so I figure I'll find out firsthand as time goes by). Oh, and pls. none of the standard sentimental answers-- "sex is more about the connection," "Personality counts for more," etc., unless you (a) are a guy, and (b) can personally attest firsthand that these are accurate for you. Thanks!

Poor student doesn't want to buy new suits for his new job

demagogue — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 10:09:29 -0800

Men's suit-filter: Went to the tailor to get a couple of my suit jackets looked at. They told me that it wasn't that the shoulder was too tight (which I'd thought was the problem), but it was that the there wasn't enough room in the sleeve, in the area around my triceps. And upon opening up the inside of the sleeve, the tailor pronounced that there wasn't enough fabric to make the sleeve significantly bigger. Is there any way around this? Thanks MeFites!

I want a physical thing, no more, no less

Anonymous — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 14:32:52 -0800

How do I identify and meet women interested in a one night stand? For the past few years, I've found myself in a number of relationships where my partners don't want to have sex. They'll do everything to remain technical virgins (oral, mutual masturbation, etc.), but penetrative intercourse is out. For some reason, I seem to keep meeting these sorts of women when I go out looking for a girlfriend.

At this point, I'm single and ready to have some fun. I've been thinking of going to bars and other places where I might meet women who are interested in a purely sexual relationship.

My questions are:

1. How can I tell if a woman is interested in having a one night stand?

2. Where can I meet women who are interested in only a sexual relationship? For example, does craigslist Casual Encounters actually work?

3. If I suspect a woman may be interested in a one night stand, then how can I proposition her for this?

If you need to follow up, throwaway e-mail is mansextonight at gmail.com.

Give a Song a Title

bach — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 22:02:27 -0800

Mad Men TV Commercial Tune The new TV spot for Mad Men has in the background a great tune that is too short for shazam or any tune-finder to latch onto.

It begins with voiceover, "The critics agree..." and then cuts to text cued to a brass hit (bop, bop, bop, [lower]bop). Repeat, add ooh and ahh lyric.

Can anyone help me with the title and artist. I looked at AdBlather and AdTunes without success.

It's been airing quite a bit on the Food Network lately.

Thanks in advance.

Which recording of "Cup of Loneliness" is used in the closing credits of Mad Men 2.12?

teem — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 20:11:17 -0800

Which recording of "Cup of Loneliness" is used at the end of Mad Men season 2 episode 12, "The Mountain King", and where can I get it? Every source says it's "Cup of Loneliness" by George Jones, but none of the Cup of Loneliness recordings I've found — George Jones or otherwise — sound the same. On the episode the version is faster and higher pitched than this version, but the way the lines are sung (particularly "where the way is dark and dim") sound as though it's not simply the original sped up.

I don't have an online clip of the show, but if you've got it at home it's played as episode 2.12 closes to credits.

Knock-off of American Crew haircare products?

tfmm — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 08:45:13 -0800

I really like the smell of American Crew haircare products, the gel in particular. Does anyone know where (or if) a replica line of products is available?