Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with maternity

Need insurance for my future pregnant self

grablife365 — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 13:37:58 -0800

I need help finding insurance for now and for my future pregnant self. Possible issue I'm told: I'm in Texas. I want to change insurance carriers. I have an individual PPO at the moment. It does not cover IVF or maternity and the child unless something goes wrong. I would like to have insurance that does cover these areas. I am not pregnant but I do have a possible pre-existing condition (not yet confirmed for sure) which would make it harder to switch. I'm told being in Texas makes this even harder for me.

Where can I go that does not cost more than a few hundred a month and has all of the above?

Thanks.

Is there such thing as "spare time" during maternity/paternity leave?

Alabaster — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 11:21:37 -0800

Is there such thing as "spare time" during maternity/paternity leave? Our first child is due this month and we're both taking a few weeks of leave from work to stay home with our newborn. Never having been through this, I'm fairly ignorant:

Some people tell me that the baby will monopolize every moment of every day and that we will be too exhausted and busy to think about anything else during our leave time.

Others tell me that the baby will sleep a lot and the down time is good for catching up on projects, creative work, etc.

I'm guessing the answer is somewhere in between, and that it depends greatly on the baby.

What are your experiences?

(I'm asking specifically about the first few weeks, particularly when home on leave from work -- however I'd also be interested in advice on how to balance having a baby/young child with hobbies and creative work--especially when these require hours of intense solitary work).

Switching while on leave?

Anonymous — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 05:34:26 -0800

ParentingLeaveFilter: I just started my paternity leave. Unlike a previous recent question, I still want to work -- I want to accept an offer of new employment with a competitor in a different city. How do I best be responsive to the needs of my new employer while treating my (soon to be) old employer fairly? A little over a month ago, I began speaking with a headhunter about an opportunity in a different city with a competitor. I interviewed and have an offer in hand. The competitor is in a bit of a bind and needs someone with a very particular skill set (i.e., mine), and would like me to start ASAP.

I love my current job. My immediate boss is the best boss I could ever hope for, but the opportunities for advancement with the new job are just too good to pass up. It is a small, specialized industry so I expect that I will continue to see (and perhaps collaborate with or compete against) people at my old group in the future. I definitely do not want to burn any bridges.

My current employer has an extremely enlightened parental leave policy -- 4 weeks of paid paternity leave. I always intended to take them up on taking the full amount of leave. Most of my matters have been transitioned to others in my group because of my paternity leave. There are a few items that need some ongoing attention, but it's not a huge deal.

I am an at-will employee. I just finished the first week out of my 4 weeks of leave. The offer from my "new" employer expires at the end of next week.

When should I give notice to my old employer? I want to be regarded as a "good guy" who treats my old employer fairly.

You can contact me at movingdad2008@gmail.com.

Leaving while on leave?

Anonymous — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:48:09 -0800

How do I give notice at one job while I'm at the end of my maternity leave without burning bridges? So I'm nearing the end of my maternity leave, and being a mom has opened up some new priorities for me. Chief among these is the desire to NOT have a huge commute every day (and other considerations, like being closer to her daycare, having more flexible hours, things like that). Being a programmer means recruiters contact you all the time anyway, and while on maternity leave I decided to check out the market. I have a second interview tomorrow with a large company that will give me a five-digit raise as well as offer the option for full-time telecommute and very flexible hours (so long as the work gets completed, they don't care WHEN it's done, as long as you're available for meetings and such).

I love the company I'm with now, particularly the people, but this is an opportunity that doesn't come along every day. (And, my primary skills are atrophying as we spend too much time NOT focusing on our primary objectives.) So, if they make the offer and I accept (we're still in the negotiations phase), how do I give notice to my current job? I want to be professional and show my consideration to people who helped me out so much, but I have to consider my family first.

Throwaway email maternitynotice@gmail.com if you need to reply offline. Anon because several co-workers are part of the hive mind these days...

Maternity benefits and studentship

Anonymous — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 11:11:03 -0800

My spouse (S) and I are both grad students. I'll be done in about a year (which is a year earlier than S) and we want to start having kids then. The problem is, since I've been a student and not engaged in insurable employment I don't think I qualify for maternity benefits. Am I understanding this correctly? Questions about Canadian maternity benefits, being a student, and baby timing inside. I understand that to get maternity benefits from the government I would have had to have worked 600 hours in the past 52 weeks. I work that much, easily, but as a student funded through scholarships, grants and assistanceships - I don't pay into EI. Does this mean that if I got pregnant and gave birth shortly after my Master's ended, I would have an income of zero? I would not qualify at all for any maternity benefits from the government? Could I apply for welfare if my spouse is a Master's student? I suppose it could be possible for me to plan the birth a little later, but no one would want to hire me if I were already pregnant, and delaying it much longer would play havoc with our other plans.

I hope to be done my thesis in April but technically have until August and might need that long, so we were thinking of starting to try so that the earliest we would be due is Sept (meaning, more likely due in Oct/Nov or even later). S will be starting second year of Master's degree in that Sept and then we'd both like to either work or start PhDs the following Sept.

(Asked anonymously because I don't want anyone to know we are planning on getting pregnant.)

Should I say I'm on maternity leave when applying for jobs?

Anonymous — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 18:24:16 -0800

I'm applying for professional jobs after 6 months of maternity leave. How, if at all, should this be reflected (a) in my resume/cover letter and (b) in my interviews? Is it misleading to say that I am still employed by the employer that I am on leave from (they are paying me benefits and I have a job waiting for me when I come back if I want it)? I am concerned that employers will be reluctant to hire someone who has just had a child as they may feel I will be likely to have another soon.

I'm considering just not telling them that I have recently had a child, but then it looks like I have 6 months more experience than I actually do, even though I am technically still employed there. Thoughts?

What are these maternity doctors and nurses chanting?

lemuria — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 23:38:14 -0800

[Link is NSFW: graphic childbirth.] What is the maternity staff chanting in this video? They seem to have a few different songs, one for when the woman is pushing and another for once the baby is born. The notes for the video say that they are in "an Asian country" but I don't know what language they're speaking. If you have any other information about these chants (how common they are, if there are other variations, how helpful and/or annoying it is to have a crooning chorus over your crotch, etc.) that would be great, too.

maternity leave questions

Snoogylips — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:36:35 -0800

I am working as a home health aide in a private home and need some information about maternity leave. Details inside. I will be having a baby in the fall. I have worked in this for this great family since fall 2007. My paycheck comes from a company but the family of my client is considered my Supervisor. When I called the company to find out what the policy on maternity leave is they said to check with my supervisor. In the past with my supervisor I have scheduled regular sick or vacation days ahead of time, but they waited til the last minute to schedule backup. The supervisor is aware of the due date and has been for a long time now. I have verbally agreed that I would stay working for them as long as I could up to the very last minute if possible. I will return after maternity leave, but I might choose to extend it. My main concern is what if I decide a few days before birth that I am unable to work. I’m mainly worried that there will be no back up for me and might have to work. How do I go about discussing this further with the super visor? Do I need to get it all in writing? How do I find out how long of maternity leave I am entitled to here in Texas? Is there anything else I need to be concerned with? What about FMLA? Any other information that I might need to know?

My lovely Bump (humps)

Snoogylips — Fri, 16 May 2008 17:01:39 -0800

I need help finding a maternity dress or nice top to go with black pants in plus size that would work to attend a wedding in June and my baby shower in September or October. I wear a size 18/20, or sometimes a 1X. I am 20 weeks now, so it needs some room for growing this summer. The weather is usually still pretty warm here in September/October So a short or long dress would be okay. Most of the plus maternity dresses I have found are wild prints. I am okay with color, I dont like anything in the plus section of mother hood maternity store online. I might like to wear a nice top with black pants. Where are some places I could check out to find something like this? I would like to spend less than 100 dollars but i want to look as cute as i feel for the baby shower! Thank you.

Do any individual or family insurance plans offer decent maternity coverage?

JPigford — Sat, 08 Sep 2007 08:41:08 -0800

Do any individual or family insurance plans offer decent maternity coverage? My wife and I run a small business (technically an S-Corp) and are our only employees. Right now we're just looking at going the Individual/Family plan route for insurance.

We're looking to possibly get pregnant in the next couple of years and so far we've found practically no insurance company that offers individuals any sort of halfway decent maternity coverage.

Where could we possibly look in to getting some sort of maternity coverage? United Healthcare says it has maternity coverage but what they cover is pretty much just what you put in so it just doesn't seem worth it.

Meal planning on a tight budget

mistsandrain — Thu, 26 Jul 2007 06:15:45 -0800

Anyone care to share their monthly grocery budget and list? Headed into maternity leave, down to one income, living in DC... Times are getting ready to be tight. Tight meaning I'd like to see how far I can get on @ $200/ month for groceries as a starting point. The way I buy groceries/ plan meals has been fairly haphazard so I don't have a general pattern of expenditures to plan from.

We prefer a low meat/ no meat diet. Fish okay.

Thanks for any suggestions....

Sources for non-crap maternity clothing for Canucks?

kmennie — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 10:28:57 -0800

I want maternity clothes that are not poor quality, not made from artificial fibres, not ill-fitting, not $250 each, and not "trendy." Sigh.

To try to sum up: I think the ideal might be a slightly more formal L.L. Bean.

To ramble on: as for the usual suspects: I've found decent stuff at the Gap -- some. Old Navy is a write-off at the moment; it's all slutty pseudo-athletic-wear. (IANA21-yr-old.) There's no Target in Canada. Wal-Mart has garbage. Ditto Thyme Maternity. Motherhood has supplied a few okay things. Second-hand stores have been good, but going to six stores to score one shirt is getting tedious. The Bay, eh. EBay, with its "I'll charge you $15 for shipping, and spend $4 on ditto," isn't worth it for Canadians.

The nicest bit of summer clothing for the eggplant-shaped I have is a linen blazer from Lands' End; irritatingly, they aren't really doing maternity anymore.

Similar previous questions have led me to browse babystyle.com; not bad, but no shipping to Canada. I ordered stuff from Motherwear on 22 March; I have no Motherwear, and nothing good to say about their customer service. Any comments on Special Addition (despite horrid name)?

I want a plain linen suit, I want a linen shift dress, I want a light coat; size 6 (S is often too small, M too big -- WTF is it with the "you're pregnant; it doesn't need to flatter" sizing?), no luck so far. My chest is breaking out periodically, so the popularity of low-cut stuff is another kick in the face.

Hopefully I'm overlooking some little wee boutique on-line stores with non-crap stuff? If it has exactly what I want at a good price and only ships to the US, and is not Motherwear, I'll consider having a friend send it along, but Canadian-friendly places are the ideal.

Am I nuts to think I'll actually have time for this stuff?

printchick — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 13:21:25 -0800

Besides doing all I can to guarantee my baby becomes a genius, what can I do during my 8 months of maternity leave to be more productive and keep my brain from turning into mush? I'm due Aug. 1, but I figure it's not too late to plan. I know the first months will be hectic and I will want to do nothing but sleep, but other than that, what can I get done? I'm thinking about making stuff to sell online at Etsy, selling stuff on Ebay, watching a ton of documentaries and TV shows from Netflix, signing up for a baby swim class or something, finding a moms group in the neighborhood, scheduling lunches with another friend who is also going to be on leave, dipping more into family genealogy, that kind of thing. I figure I'll be spending a lot of the winter months at home and I'll need to find ways to not go nuts. Any ideas? Online courses or certification type of things out there? If you had this time, what would like to do?

'A ship under sail and a big-bellied woman...'

anastasiav — Sun, 19 Feb 2006 10:29:45 -0800

[babyfilter] Good sources of non-ugly plus size maternity clothes? I miss my black jeans!!

I'm just over 18 weeks, and I cannot seem to find any good sources of plus-size maternity clothing -- so far all I can find on the web is motherhood.com, and jcpenney, and everything is so ugly!! All those awful elastic tummy panels and just blue jeans, no black to be seen anywhere! Blech.

My pre-pregnancy size was about a 20. Should I give up hope and resign myself to living in sweatpants for the next 22 weeks? Or is there some store out there, somewhere, that sells clothes in my size that won't make me look like a midwestern mall mom??

Fetal Heartbeat at 14 weeks

anastasiav — Wed, 25 Jan 2006 15:15:27 -0800

MaternityFilter - Fetal Heartbeat Question. I'm about 14 - 15 weeks pregnant. I had a normal ultrasound at 9 weeks, showed good fetal development, good heartbeat, etc. At my midwife appointment today she was unable to find a fetal heartbeat with the handheld dopler equipment in the office, and she suggested that they schedule me for another ultrasound image "in a week or so".

She did tell me several times not to worry, but I can't tell if she's genuinely not worried or is just masking her concern. She did say that she was using "the little" handheld unit, as her partner had take "the big" handheld unit to their other office.

How normal is it to be unable to hear the heartbeat at 14 weeks? I'm actually not completely paniced (just mildly worried) but my boyfriend is much more concerned. Should I push for a second ultrasound within the next couple days?

Nothing else seems to be "wrong" except my nasuea is easing up, which I'm told should be normal at this point.

Give me some data to help calm my sweetie down, please!

can my employer delay my raise because i'm pregnant?

Anonymous — Wed, 30 Nov 2005 07:15:31 -0800

my employer recently told me that a number of people in the company are underpaid relative to industry standards and will be getting salary adjustments. The good new: I am one of those people. The bad news: Everyone else who is getting a raise is scheduled to get theirs on january 1st; I, on the other hand, was told that mine would start on May 1st, when I return from my 3 month maternity leave (February to the end of march). Is this legal to treat me differently because I am pregnant? Note that I will continue to be paid during my maternity leave, as this is company policy. In effect, they are postponing my raise by 4 months. I do plan to return to work and have told them this. Any advice is appreciated!