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Anonymous (57)

When no sex feels like I am not desirable

I need help. I am seeking therapy for this issue, but it will take about six weeks before I can get in. My partner (m 36) and I (f 34) are not having sex. It has been about four months. He is dealing with depression and anxiety issues and is on medication for this. This has been pretty hard for me since we greatly enjoyed such an active sex life prior to this. He attributes our sexual issues to his diagnosis and medication. In my head I believe what he tells me, but this is triggering past issues for me that are getting in the way of me believing what he says. The fact that he masturbates at least once a day is hard for me to handle. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 10, 2014 - 30 answers

Have I permanently desensitized my penis?

NSFW, obviously. Short version: masturbating dry seems to have done some long-term nerve damage; is this reversible? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 3, 2014 - 7 answers

What can I do about severe sexual incompatibility?

I have a high sex drive, my partner has a low sex drive. This incompatibility is making me depressed to the point that I feel like I can't stay in the relationship, despite everything else between us being really, really great. I don't know what my options are or what I can do to try and work with this. [more inside]
posted by Vrai on Feb 15, 2014 - 33 answers

It's been a long, long time coming...

My relationship is great, with one small problem - no matter what my girlfriend and I try, I'm not having an orgasm. Oversharing details inside... [more inside]
posted by Ed The Sock on Jan 12, 2014 - 30 answers

How To Talk About Sex

Occasionally, I bring up the subject of sex with my partner, and I always get nowhere. Sex has never been something that we've really talked about. We had those first few conversations when we met several years ago: disclosures of risks, general preferences, expectations for monogamy, etc. and from there we just let it develop naturally. We need to talk about it because our sex life isn't meeting my needs, and I've asked to talk about it, but I still don't know how to talk about it, and I'm afraid this is just going to become another in a string of failed attempts to talk about sex. [more inside]
posted by this *is* my happy face on Dec 19, 2013 - 28 answers

How to Handle/Support Boyfriend Battling Porn/Masturbation Addiction?

My boyfriend of 5 months has recently confessed that the sexual problems we'd been having are largely due to his addiction to masturbating/porn. He has decided that he needs to quit and "reboot" his brain-- he's joined "nofap" on reddit, and seems very committed to making this change. It's been about two weeks since he took on the "challenge." It's a bit hard for me because a) I want to support him in any way I can while taking care of myself and b) I feel a overwhelmed by the extent of his problem and how it interrelates with our relationship. Help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 25, 2013 - 33 answers

Male masturbation and using lube

I honestly don't know this, and almost none of the men that I know are circumcized, so I wouldn't know who to ask in person. Is it generally so that lube is more needed/vital/ important/whathaveyou for masturbation if one is a male who is circumcized? [more inside]
posted by Too-Ticky on Jun 8, 2013 - 12 answers

Sit. Stay. Heel. Come.

A NSFW question about achieving a particular female orgasm... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 4, 2013 - 26 answers

manual/digital

One of my kinks is being watched by strangers online. How can I make sure this is safe? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 30, 2013 - 8 answers

How should we respond when our daughter plays with herself?

She's only a toddler, is this a problem and, if so, how do we handle it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 3, 2013 - 51 answers

Help me find a certain vibrator?

I am looking for a certain type of vibrator. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 21, 2013 - 5 answers

Found boyfriend's masturbatory material, working on internal damage control

How common is it to masturbate to people from your past if you are in a relationship? [more inside]
posted by Issas on Oct 25, 2012 - 24 answers

Bad Relationship Anxiety--And I'm Utterly Single Right Now

How reasonable is it to expect my future/potential boyfriend or husband to NOT fantasize / masturbate to other women? Is it off-my-rocker to expect this from a man I'm in love with? [more inside]
posted by rhythm_queen on Oct 7, 2012 - 73 answers

How do I stop masturbating to violent images?

I am a woman who is deeply ashamed of what sexually excites me and need help or resources in learning to stop my porn/masturbation problem. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 22, 2012 - 24 answers

Will learning to orgasm through masturbation help me through my divorce?

Will learning to orgasm through masturbation help me through my divorce? Female, been married 10 years, left because of verbal abuse, disturbed by reawakening of my sexuality now I'm "old" (nearly 40) and unloved. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 10, 2012 - 12 answers

Am I putting too much pressure on my head in this position?

Am I going to hurt my neck while masturbating? I'm female. No, not talking about erotic asphyxiation. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 27, 2012 - 9 answers

How can I encourage my nice explore her body without shame?

I am a virtual aunt to a young woman who has never masturbated. She believes that she needs to learn, but she is worried that god will stop loving her. [more inside]
posted by Fenriss on May 14, 2012 - 14 answers

Put socks on your hands

Techniques to break porn and masturbation addiction? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 15, 2011 - 25 answers

How Many Men Have the Ability to Climax from Frenulum Stimulation?

How common is it for a man to be able to reach an ejaculatory orgasm just by stimulating the frenulum of his penis? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 9, 2011 - 13 answers

I want to watch her have sex with someone she loves.

How can I encourage my SO to go solo..and let me watch? NSFW details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 11, 2011 - 10 answers

How can masturbation possibly be this difficult?

[female masturbation filter] I think I am perfectly healthy, so why can't I bring myself off? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 4, 2011 - 21 answers

weirdness at work

I am almost positive my coworker is...well, masturbating in his cube. Yikes! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 31, 2011 - 42 answers

We live together. How do we best play withourselves separately?

Masturbation when co-habitating hacks: How do you work out "alone time" when you're living with your SO? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 18, 2011 - 42 answers

Did my masturbation style overwork my vaginal muscles?

I am female. Someone whom I slept with complained that it was difficult to do the missionary position with me. Did my masturbation technique cause this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 26, 2011 - 37 answers

Please Help She Bop

I can only orgasm in one specific way. I blame a decade and a half of one type of masturbation. I’m 27, female, and a special snowflake. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 8, 2011 - 16 answers

help us get off

masturbation for a healthy couple. how to talk about it. [nsfw] [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 30, 2010 - 11 answers

Hello Brain, It's your ass, Breaking news we might be Gay?

Hello Brain, It's your ass, Breaking news we might be Gay? I'm a 30 year old male, and up until recently I was pretty certain I was 100% Straight, Now I'm not so sure. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 16, 2010 - 24 answers

how do I get rid of these calluses?

How can I get rid of these calluses on my right hand? I've tried a emery file, I've tried wearing a glove, tried loosening my grip, and, ahem, gripping less often, but I still have embarassing calluses on my right hand. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 9, 2010 - 17 answers

How common is it for men to not masturbate?

How common is it for men to have the urge to not masturbate? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 19, 2010 - 15 answers

Cravings for cigaretts and masturbating

Can you compare the craving someone gets for a cigarette to the craving to masturbate? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 14, 2010 - 19 answers

flies solo, wants to ride tandem

an orgasm is something that happens when i'm alone. [more inside]
posted by pudders on Apr 7, 2010 - 13 answers

Woman looking for ways to play on my own.

Please help a single, adventurous woman step up her kink in simple, everyday ways. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 3, 2010 - 18 answers

The elusive hands-free male orgasm

SexperimentFilter: I'm a man interested in having an orgasm by prostate stimulation alone. How do I do this? Read on for OMG TMI, NSFW, and maybe even a little WTF. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 1, 2010 - 7 answers

Oh oh oh!

Why can't I get aroused on my own and how do I start? Why doesn't masturbation feel good and how can I make it start? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 8, 2009 - 6 answers

Is it wrong to masturbate to one's exes when in a relationship?

Autoeroticafilter: Are certain self-pleasuring activities not OK? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 8, 2009 - 66 answers

Penis scars?

I am masturbating so many times every day (6 or more times to orgasm mainly with my left hand reading erotica - yeah, I can read and work at the same time yo) that I have established a mound of scar over the top of my foreskin. How long should I abstain for it to fall off and what are some ways I should abstain while I am waiting. It's not an STD, I have been to a doc in the meantime. Frodo!
posted by anonymous on Nov 26, 2009 - 8 answers

How to help a long-term loner happy with a lady?

How can I make my new partner come?? NSFW details follow. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 20, 2009 - 23 answers

Why are my orgasms so weak?

Are my orgasms always going to be this weak? Teach me to do it better! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 11, 2009 - 24 answers

Why are my pants parts sending different messages to my sleep center?

I Can't Believe I'm Going To Ask This Non-Anonymously Filter: Why do I fall asleep after a clitoral orgasm, but not after an orgasm of the vaginal variety? [more inside]
posted by grapefruitmoon on Nov 3, 2009 - 24 answers

Correlations between masturbation and sex

Is there a correlation between how long it takes me to achieve orgasm via masturbation and how long I can last in bed with a woman? [more inside]
posted by ascetic on Sep 7, 2009 - 15 answers

Micro-micro-micropenis?

So, I think I might have two clitorises. Is this even possible? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 27, 2009 - 7 answers

Death grip has me in a tight spot.

How can I resensitize my penis after excessive masturbating? (NSFW) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 8, 2009 - 15 answers

Girl who can't come with partners. If sleeping together only winds up making everyone unhappy, why do it?

I'm a girl who hasn't been able to orgasm with a partner. It's been a major issue in my relationships. Is there really any point to having sexual relationships? (explicit but unsexy text) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 25, 2009 - 39 answers

Can a Male have Multiple Orgasms?

Possibly NSFW question about male masturbation. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 16, 2009 - 14 answers

what do you think about while masturbating?

I'd like to know what other people think about while masturbating and how that differs from what they think about while having sexual intercourse. [more inside]
posted by krautland on Jun 29, 2009 - 29 answers

Bedtime stories

Find me stories (books, movies, links, anecdotes) of how two ordinary, quiet, straight middle-aged people met, and learned to care for each other. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 27, 2009 - 14 answers

Ejaculation from Masturbation

When masturbating, upon what do you ejaculate? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 6, 2009 - 47 answers

Dreaming about public indecency

I'm constantly dreaming about masturbating in public. Is this normal? If not, how can I stop? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 13, 2009 - 10 answers

orgasms aren't supposed to be a headache :(

I get headaches when I masturbate. Give me advice and hope, please? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 6, 2009 - 14 answers

The Conquering Hero "Comes"

My girlfriend can't get me to orgasm. Plenty of NSFWness inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 22, 2009 - 31 answers

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