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Bringing sexy back?

I love my wife, and I'm attracted to my wife, but I don't think about having sex with her anymore, and we haven't had sex for over a year. We've had lots of problems, and we've worked through many of them, but this one is the toughest for us. Is it possible to rekindle our sex life after so much time? Has anyone been able to do that? If so, how? Throw away address: emailzzzzzzzzzz@gmail.com
posted by anonymous on Jun 1, 2012 - 14 answers

Ideas of details to keep fun and romance in a marriage

Can you give me ideas of romantic/funny things a wife can do for her husband, besides making his favorite dishes or dressing up for bed, which I already do? If you have other cooking/dressing up ideas, they are also welcome, though! [more inside]
posted by Tarumba on May 29, 2012 - 17 answers

I just asked my husband for a divorce and he is in complete denial about it.

I just asked my husband for a divorce and he is in complete denial about it. It's like I never asked. How do you tell someone you want a divorce when they won't listen to you? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2012 - 17 answers

How can I get past a disappointing marriage proposal?

How do I get over feeling disappointment in the way that my boyfriend proposed, and just enjoy being engaged? And also, how do I overcome the shame associated with being disappointed? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 28, 2012 - 88 answers

Friend's wife confided in me about their marriage and I'm worried. How can I help?

Not too long ago, I was hanging out with a very good friend's wife. I have been friend's with him for almost ten years now and have known and been friends with his wife for half that time. She confided in me something very disturbing about their marriage - that they hadn't had sex in a few years (about the same amount of time as their marriage) and it feels more like a room-mate situation. I am going to keep the details to a minimum but I'm sure you can extrapolate. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 28, 2012 - 30 answers

European marrying a US citizen - US visa process?

European marrying a US citizen - US visa process? [more inside]
posted by LivinginYes on May 27, 2012 - 9 answers

Help me help my marriage

My wife of 14 years never tells me she loves me. She never initiates sex. She never holds my hand, kisses or casually touches me. No pillow talk. No thoughtful little gifts. I do all of these things for her as often as I can. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 22, 2012 - 43 answers

Help me cope with the idea of a coming separation

We've been together for the past 15 years. My wife recently discovered that she in fact does not love me. It's making me feel very weak - we've started therapy, but i'm looking for ways to cope between sessions, and also come to terms with the fact that we may separate. Long story follows. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2012 - 20 answers

How can I convince my wife to come to marriage counselling sessions with me?

I'm trying to convince my wife to attend marriage counselling with me, but I'm having a hard time doing so. Her opinion of marriage counselling (based on what she's read online) is that it's a waste of money and that a marriage counsellor would "only tell us what we already know." When I've pointed out that a marriage counsellor is there to help facilitate communication, her response has been "if we need a facilitator to help us communicate we're fucked anyway." Reasons for needing counselling + bonus snowflakery inside. Apologies; it turned into a bit of a mind-dumpy wall of text. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2012 - 21 answers

I don't want sex with my husband. What should I do?

Four years ago I married a great guy. We've been together a total of eight years. Sometime around when we got married...maybe a little before, I stopped wanting sex with him. I dreaded it on our wedding night/honeymoon. At first I thought it was just a phase, something to do with wedding planning burnout and general nerves. Four years later, it's even worse than it was. Otherwise, we have a good relationship, I think. We have everything in common, a shared worldview, good communication. Because of the sexual issue, we have talked numerous times about separating. I guess what I can't figure out is, why this has happened, and if our entire relationship is worth ending over it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 20, 2012 - 80 answers

It's all just a game.

I need an Ask sanity check about something in my relationship that is driving me crazy. My husband has a planned activity every other weekend, and my mounting frustration with the situation is becoming harder for me to ignore. But is it really something that I should be this upset about? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 20, 2012 - 60 answers

My wife confessed to being molested as a child and I am not sure how to respond

I've been married to my wife for a few years, but she confessed to me recently that a neighbor molested her when she was a child. How can I respond to this in a helpful, supportive way? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 17, 2012 - 33 answers

I don't want to be a psycho bride to be

[Psycho Filter] - I love him. He loves me. We intend to get married next year. YAY! But it feels like a really long time away. Help me to be patient and enjoy the anticipation and build up, because right now I am suffocating in a world of "OMG CAN WE PLZ GET MARRIED YESTERDAY!" eagerness. [more inside]
posted by gwenlister on May 16, 2012 - 28 answers

I don't need this.

I am happily married, but I'm having trouble dealing with an ex who dumped me and now regrets it. Please help me not put my marriage at risk. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 12, 2012 - 38 answers

Maid of Honor drama

While planning my totally drama-free wedding, I'm having drama with my maid of honor and at this point I'm not sure whether I should even have a maid of honor. Advice, please! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 11, 2012 - 88 answers

Ring? Check. Girlfriend? Check. Now what do I do?

Me and my girlfriend are going to get engaged in a couple of weeks and both decided that we would rather avoid a formal proposal. Instead, we will spend a day together at the beach and magically emerge engaged. Given the fact that the surprise quirky engagement is off the table, any ideas for how I can make this an even-less forgettable day? Bonus question: What are the technical things that you regret missing from when you got engaged? More pictures? Who to tell first? What am I missing?
posted by anonymous on May 6, 2012 - 18 answers

How to determine immigration status of ex-wife after immigration/marriage fraud?

I, a U.S. citizen, married a foreign national some time ago and helped her obtain conditional permanent resident status as a result of the marriage. I subsequently discovered that she had no intent of engaging in a legitimate marital relationship with me and, instead, had married me for the sole purpose of becoming a permanent resident of the United States. Upon this discovery, I filed for an annulment but was instead granted a divorce (details inside). My immigrant ex-wife will soon need to apply (via the I-751 process) to convert her "conditional" permanent resident status to "true" permanent resident status if she wishes to remain in the United States legally (which she does). I do not know whether she will be granted this status, but I would like to find out whether or not she does attain it. Does anyone have any ideas as to how I might find this out? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 1, 2012 - 11 answers

Housework Blues

I'm confused about how to equitably split up housework. I am messier than my spouse, and to him this means I should do all the housework. Help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2012 - 54 answers

Should I stay or should I go?

Husband's mental health problems led him to compulsively spend over £27,000 (about $44,000) while I supported both of us for three years. I know he'll work hard on therapy, but I don't know if I should divorce him. Should I try and forgive? [warning, long!] [more inside]
posted by TriparteGoddess on Apr 29, 2012 - 62 answers

I’m looking for advice on how to handle an unexpected separation from my husband.

I’m looking for advice on how to handle an unexpected separation from my husband. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 27, 2012 - 52 answers

Separated from wife, got involved with someone else, should I reconcile with my wife?

I've been separated from my wife for over six months. During that time I got involved with someone else, but now I'm thinking about going back to my wife. Please tell me I'm not making a mistake. [more inside]
posted by quoth_the_raven on Apr 23, 2012 - 53 answers

How to keep falling in love with my wife?

Resources on how to foster passion and "have fun" with your spouse? [more inside]
posted by ohsnapdragon on Apr 23, 2012 - 16 answers

I WILL say YES!

Surprise marriage proposal filter, askee edition: how did you handle it and what did you notice your spouse doing a lot of before he/she proposed? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 20, 2012 - 20 answers

helping someone who survived war.

My SO went through trauma. They are starting to open up a bit and I don't know what to do, or even if I should do anything. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 17, 2012 - 13 answers

We need recommendations for an affordable couples' counselor in NYC.

My husband and I need recommendations for couples' counseling in NYC, Manhattan or Brooklyn, and would love something relatively affordable (under $120/session, if possible). [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 16, 2012 - 4 answers

How do I live with my very own power person?

Those who have read or are familiar with Mira Kirshenbaum's "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay:" recommend books / resources for dealing with my Power Person wife. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 16, 2012 - 20 answers

Breaking up is hard to do

I'm ending my marriage. How do I do it with kindness? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 9, 2012 - 25 answers

Another "should I get married?" question.

Why can't I control my stupid feelings? Love one guy, distracted by another, engaged to be married. Advice/personal experience? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 6, 2012 - 33 answers

Can I marry my Sister in Law?

Can I marry my Sister in Law? I have a question about second marriages that I would like to get some opinions on. I have been a widower now for 14 months. I am 61. My wife’s sister (my sister in law) has been a widow now for 4 years. She is 58. She and her husband and my wife and I were always very close. She has been an incredible friend this last year and helped me through my grieving process. We have been spending a moderate amount of time together. We get along famously and have similar interests. I have become very fond of her. Is it inappropriate for me to ask her about possible dating with a long term relationship and even marriage on my mind? Or is it appropriate? Oh by the way, neither of us has dated at all. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 5, 2012 - 42 answers

Help me navigate the untraditional wedding waters

Yay, we got married, it was awesome, perfect for us, we invited NO ONE! However, it is a first marriage for both us, who are each in our early thirties and I'm having a hard time reconciling competing ideas from friends, family, and even my silly head. Can you help me figure out to include our loved ones in the celebration in a way that is fun for everyone and stressful for no one? (This gets a little long and rambling) [more inside]
posted by stormygrey on Apr 3, 2012 - 26 answers

Another health insurance question...

Another health-insurance question - how to deal with an unexpected loss of coverage for my GF. Which of our options is best? [more inside]
posted by FreelanceBureaucrat on Mar 31, 2012 - 17 answers

When does introversion become unhealthy?

Is there something wrong with my husband with regard to his introversion? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2012 - 33 answers

How can I help my wife reduce her stress levels?

My wife is struggling with stress levels at work. How can I help her reduce them without patronising her, and at the same time stop being so selfish when dealing with her stress? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 21, 2012 - 8 answers

Facing divorce and depression

I'm lost. I'm facing divorce of my wife of 5 years. I've been with her for longer than that, 10, 12 years. We have a 3 year old son. I need help. How can one survive this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 21, 2012 - 37 answers

Any hope?

My wife and I are becoming incompatible, can this be fixed or should I start thinking about heading for the exit [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 20, 2012 - 49 answers

Chicago Wedding Catering

Does anyone know any good caterers for a wedding in Chicago? [more inside]
posted by notswedish on Mar 17, 2012 - 5 answers

Clearly written CA marriage law?

Where can I find a readable, concise document outlining marriage laws in California? [more inside]
posted by JJkiss on Mar 15, 2012 - 4 answers

Help me keep helping my wife deal with long-term unemployment.

The psychological fallout of my wife's 13-month unemployment is going to make me crack. Please help me deal. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 14, 2012 - 31 answers

How do you convince someone to leave an abuser?

He says she's crazy, she says she's not. How to help a friend escape an abusive situation? [more inside]
posted by Chelsaroo650 on Mar 9, 2012 - 17 answers

The Quakers Have the Right Idea

Help me marry some folks! [more inside]
posted by *s on Mar 5, 2012 - 18 answers

Romantic gestures and suggestions

Romantic gestures [more inside]
posted by pakora1 on Mar 2, 2012 - 29 answers

How do I love better?

I really don't want to end up alone. What can I start doing to break this generational cycle? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 26, 2012 - 12 answers

Help me help my marriage.

Hitting a brick wall in my marriage and I would appreciate some different perspectives to help me figure out how to move forward. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 24, 2012 - 49 answers

Need marriage communication book recommendations

Need book recommendations for improving communication in marriage as a substitute for therapy [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 21, 2012 - 13 answers

How to prevent self sabotage?

Asking for a friend: How can a person get over a crippling anxiety of getting dumped? [more inside]
posted by stedman15 on Feb 20, 2012 - 11 answers

Will there be long term issues with dating/marrying someone 13 years older than me?

What long-term issues arise with marrying an older man? [more inside]
posted by Jade_bug on Feb 18, 2012 - 56 answers

We've only been dating for a few months. He doesn't want to get married, ever. I do. What now?

We've only been dating for a few months. He doesn't want to get married, ever. I do. What now? [more inside]
posted by anotheraccount on Feb 18, 2012 - 93 answers

Boundaries or ultimatums?

What is the difference between an ultimatum and a hard limit? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 16, 2012 - 44 answers

Should I try to get pregnant?

1 - Is it a good idea to get pregnant when a close loved one is dying? 2 - If I decide to do it, how can I get my husband off the fence? [more inside]
posted by thelastgirl on Feb 13, 2012 - 59 answers

help me help them work it out

Asking for a friend. Marriage counseling in the Arlington/DC area? Recommendations needed... [more inside]
posted by raztaj on Feb 12, 2012 - 1 answer

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