147 posts tagged with marriage and resolved.
Displaying 1 through 50 of 147. Subscribe:

Struggling with Alcoholism and Infidelity

My marriage is falling apart and I am getting very mixed messages from my wife. As she has finally started the road to recovery she also met someone else in AA and they are having quite the affair. I am struggling with the hurt and anger but also with still loving her and wanting her back. Please help me with some new perspectives. [more inside]
posted by redyaky on Aug 28, 2016 - 32 answers

Sexsomnia and Body Policing

So, it appears I have some kind of sexsomnia, where I masturbate while I'm sleeping. I will wake up occasionally with my hands in my pants, with no recollection of anything. This is bothersome to me and my husband, for different reasons. [more inside]
posted by Dressed to Kill on Aug 1, 2016 - 24 answers

Where to go for advice about life issues?

If you don't have any close friends or trusted relatives in whom you can confide, where can you find a sounding board for problems you're facing? [more inside]
posted by akk2014 on Jul 18, 2016 - 21 answers

Not enthused about sibling's engagement. What to say?

My older brother just proposed to his girlfriend of ~1 year. Red flags have gone off at every turn in his rapidly-progressing relationship with her. Yesterday, he sent a message to me and my parents announcing his intentions to propose, and then it happened before I got a chance to talk with him. My question is, how do I respond to him? More details and a TWIST! inside. [more inside]
posted by Slater Sheldahl on Jun 13, 2016 - 61 answers

Married but interested in younger/beautiful girls

I have been married with an older woman for about 4 years and now I have developed interests towards younger girls. [more inside]
posted by wondering_man on May 4, 2016 - 52 answers

How do I fix my life?

I am about to graduate college with a business degree, a mediocre gpa, and very little experience. I have not made a single friend in college or been in a relationship. I lived with my parents for the whole entire time in college and they expect me to be married before leaving the house. I tend to succumb to extreme laziness and procrastination. I can spend 8 hours daily on the internet instead of doing homework. This procrastination has seeped into my job search. Am I ever going to be prepared for life? [more inside]
posted by sheepishchiffon on Apr 26, 2016 - 15 answers

How do we break out of a years long separation limbo?

Over five years ago I (male) decided to separate from my wife. We’ve been married for 16 years. The dam burst of emotion that fueled my decision to separate was spent before going all the way to divorce. She hasn’t divorced me either. Neither of us has dated anyone else. Things have simmered to an uneasy state of limbo, where we’re technically married, yet more like just friends and co-parents. How do you break out of an indecision so powerful that any choice feels like dying? Warning: tsunami of text inside! [more inside]
posted by star fruit on Apr 15, 2016 - 22 answers

Can this (new! expensive!) marital bed be saved?

I am the sleeping equivalent of the princess and the pea. My partner is a restless sleeper. For years, we've solved this problem by pushing two ikea twin beds together. As a gift to ourselves, we just bought a beautiful bed. Popped our two mattresses in....and discovered that the motion transfer problems have returned. Much sadness and gnashing of teeth has ensued. Please help! Details inside. [more inside]
posted by jeszac on Apr 1, 2016 - 11 answers

My guy does not like dogs the same. Comments? Advice?

My new guy does not like dogs the same way I do. Mainly he believes large dogs should be outside at all times because then if they poop he doesn't have to clean up large poop. He states he's a dog lover. [more inside]
posted by LadyAerin on Feb 28, 2016 - 107 answers

What's that quote about relationships ending/marriages being lost?

I read (somewhere?) a quote by someone (an author? poet?) that when a relationship (marriage?) ends, a little language shared by the two is lost. I've googled all sorts of combinations of these words and cannot find it. Did I hallucinate this? Thanks!
posted by Brian Puccio on Dec 12, 2015 - 3 answers

It's been a long December-- reason to believe

It's been a long year for Draccy. I've separated, started divorce proceedings, had a huge mental health scare and am currently battling loneliness, shame and desolation. My hand aches where my wedding band used to be. I used to fidget with it. I miss it. So here's the scoop. [more inside]
posted by Draccy on Dec 11, 2015 - 22 answers

Advice for getting a UK fiancé visa in 2015

I'm an American man who just proposed to a British woman and I am wondering what pitfalls to watch out for in applying for a visa to enter the UK to marry. [more inside]
posted by johngoren on Sep 17, 2015 - 8 answers

Getting Social Security to change my middle name to my maiden name

I got married. I’m trying to change my name so my maiden name becomes my new middle name and I drop my given middle name entirely. It’s harder than it looks. [more inside]
posted by the turtle's teeth on Sep 3, 2015 - 31 answers

What's wrong with marrying your first love?

Or what's not wrong with it? It's coming (or came) to the time where marriage is on the forefront of everyone's thoughts in my relationship. There's a lot of pressure to get married soon, and with a combination of dissenting internal and external voices, there's a lot of confusion going on in my head. [more inside]
posted by buttonedup on Jul 4, 2015 - 53 answers

If i invite one boss, am I obligated to invite the other?

The CEO of my company shot me a chat saying something alongs the lines of "My wedding invite must have been lost in the mail". (I requested time off from my job and cited the reason that I was getting married). [more inside]
posted by memi on Jun 10, 2015 - 23 answers

Do I want to interrupt an engineering career to do patent law?

I’m trying to determine if it’s worth it to plan a career change from engineering to patent law, with a lengthy, difficult, expensive stop through law school first. Have you done this? Do you have special insight? [more inside]
posted by rybreadmed on Jun 3, 2015 - 17 answers

Not invited to the wedding

My brother-in-law invited my wife and my kids to his wedding, but not me. This evening, he texted my wife asking her to do a reading at the wedding. She's going to say yes. I feel amazingly resentful. Help. [more inside]
posted by QuantumMeruit on May 14, 2015 - 36 answers

Help me cope with my anxiety about my wife's anxiety!

My wife struggles with anxiety and paranoid thoughts about our marriage. She'll often start asking questions of me about where I've been, if I'm seeing anyone else, whether I want to leave her and whether I think I'd be better off without her. I'm used to this, and I know that these are just intrusive thoughts rather than what she rationally believes, but I'm about to go away for work and I can't stop feeling anxious about what might happen whilst I'm away. [more inside]
posted by yasp on May 1, 2015 - 75 answers

Give me your best NON-RELIGIOUS wedding readings

I'm looking for a short reading for our wedding that we can ask an athiest friend of ours to read. Other portions of the ceremony will contain religious elements, but we don't want to ask him to read anything that might make him feel uncomfortable or awkward. [more inside]
posted by rainbowbrite on Mar 25, 2015 - 29 answers

How do we tell his family that we are having a secular wedding?

My fiance and I are both atheists with strong antitheist views. We're getting married in November and want something that represents us. His family, however, is extremely religious (Baptist) and will have certain expectations of us; they don't easily take no for an answer. What is the best way to balance the two worlds? [more inside]
posted by DriftingLotus on Feb 8, 2015 - 30 answers

Sleep is my religion, but it's not his.

My husband snores loudly (85db peaks). I'm a light sleeper, and have general anxiety and PTSD issues that are exacerbated by lack of sleep. I can't sacrifice my mental health to the snoring! I'm perfectly happy sleeping in another room, and this was part of the deal when we got married. Now he's really upset about it. I don't need solutions for the snoring, just for the anger and upset it's causing in our home. [more inside]
posted by Bottlecap on Feb 6, 2015 - 57 answers

How do I tell them it's OK to be white?

One of my nieces, currently studying in Europe, recently came home (somewhere in Subsaharan Africa) with her white European boyfriend to introduce him to the family and her parents are dead set against the idea of her marrying the guy. [more inside]
posted by Kwadeng on Feb 2, 2015 - 15 answers

My fiance wants to reschedule our wedding (again)

I need advice on a) what to do, and b) how to process my feelings. My fiance and I have been engaged for a year. Our original plan was to have a traditional wedding in June 2015. We decided that it was too much and we wanted to elope. 3 weeks ago, we set our "wedding date" for December 18th. Today my fiance told me that he felt depressed (he sometimes gets pretty bad seasonal depression) and stressed out, and that if we get married now, he's not going to enjoy it at all. He wants to reschedule again. [more inside]
posted by permiechickie on Dec 1, 2014 - 66 answers

The Pros and Cons of Marriage

Assuming we'll be together until death, I'm wondering what the reasons are for and against marrying my partner. [more inside]
posted by little_dog_laughing on Nov 7, 2014 - 34 answers

Taking a few days for myself… now what?

After a turbulent period in my marriage, I'm taking a few days out for myself. Thing is, I don't know exactly what to do in those few days, or how best to work on things in my marriage whilst I'm away. [more inside]
posted by yasp on Sep 8, 2014 - 32 answers

How do I "I do?"

My partner and I are having a wedding in two months. We'd like to get legally married before the ceremony, but can't decide what the best option for us would be. My partner is a man, but here in Ohio it isn't possible for him to change his birth certificate to match this. Do we go to another state to marry, or try to get a license in Ohio? [more inside]
posted by dinofuzz on Jul 25, 2014 - 11 answers

How to celebrate six months of marriage at a wedding party?

In March, Mrs. HeroZero and I exchanged vows and rings at City Hall with a very small group of friends and immediate family. On Labor Day, we're having a bigger wedding party with the friends and family who couldn't come to the original, tiny event. What are some ideas for making this ceremony meaningful in a way that's different from how a wedding goes? [more inside]
posted by HeroZero on Jul 20, 2014 - 8 answers

Help my future-husband and I choose a meaningful new last name

We're a mixed-race couple that are getting married soonish and really want to blend our Chinese-whiteness together into one name, but are coming up completely blank. I need ideas! Chinese surname with an alternative spelling? White last name that sounds suspiciously Chinese? [more inside]
posted by Snacks on Jul 18, 2014 - 36 answers

Should I get back together with my ex-wife?

I could really use some input to help me sort through all of this. At 40 years old, she was having a lesbian affair and asked me to move out. I was devastated. But in hindsight, our marriage wasn't a good one. And I suppose it was just a matter of time before something came along to unravel the whole thing. Now she wants me back. I have no clue how I even feel, much less if I even want to try again. Wall of text inside. [more inside]
posted by normal_guy on Jul 17, 2014 - 37 answers

single-hood wasted on the single?

What do you or did you enjoy about being single? What do partnered mefites miss? [more inside]
posted by morganw on Jul 10, 2014 - 88 answers

Any female performers who share a last name with their husband?

I've noticed that female performers tend to keep the surname they were born with, if they don't come up with a whole new artist name entirely. They hardly ever take their husband's name. Please help me find a decent list of exceptions. I am looking for answers in two categories: 1. Women who started as performers, then changed their last names when they got married. 2. Women who got married and took their husbands' last names, then embarked on successful performance careers. Bonus points for women from the above cases whose husbands aren't famous themselves. Important: I am not interested in cases where the actress creates a hyphenation of her maiden name and her husband's name, like Farrah Fawcett-Majors, Jada Pinkett Smith, or Pamela Anderson Lee. Unfortunately those are the only ones I can think of!
posted by oxisos on Mar 30, 2014 - 51 answers

Changing your name...some of the time?

I'm getting married, and am considering what to do about changing my name. My finance and I both like the idea of changing my name, both for personal and practical reason -- we are both sort of traditional when it comes to things like this, both like the idea of both having the same name as our kids, our names sound awful hyphenated, etc. That said, I worry about this professionally. [more inside]
posted by rainbowbrite on Feb 26, 2014 - 43 answers

What is the best, most proactive type of relationship counseling?

My husband and I have been married for 5 years, together for 15. We both have our own issues (depression, ADD) and lately things have been very bad between us. Weekly fights with yelling and crying, instead of disagreements or discussion. He wants us to find a "coach" that will help us define and reach our goals, I don't know if just coaching will help us. [more inside]
posted by natasha_k on Feb 25, 2014 - 10 answers

Detaching whilst staying

How does one practice detachment in a codependent, anxiety-rich relationship? How can I be the husband my wife needs me to be whilst also getting what I need? [more inside]
posted by yasp on Jan 22, 2014 - 47 answers

Book for sudden end to a marriage

Asking for a friend: I was approached by a friend today who was looking for a book to recommend to a friend of her's. The friend of a friend is going through a sudden and bewildering end to a marriage (her husband of many years packed his clothes while she was at the store and left). Obviously, she is in tremendous shock and plans to seek help from a counselor, but I'm wondering if anyone can recommend any books for her in the meantime. [more inside]
posted by 4ster on Jan 19, 2014 - 7 answers

Just got engaged. Problem, I still think about the one that got away.

I just got engaged to an amazing guy. He's funny, smart, interesting, stable, settled in his career, and is going places...basically, a "10" by any and every objective measure. The problem is that ever since we've gotten engaged, I keep thinking of the first and only guy I've ever felt was "the one" I was destined to be with, and the problem has only exacerbated since my fiancé wants to drop his life for a year in California to be closer to me as I finish up college. Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 5, 2013 - 102 answers

What is the ideal age gap in heterosexual relationships?

A growing body of scientific research suggests that the ideal age gap between a man and a woman is fifteen years, provided that the latter is younger so as to mitigate the effect of the midlife crisis. Yet, conventional wisdom posits that the half-your-age-plus-seven rule and that the three to six years rule are equally valid. What do you think? [more inside]
posted by lotusmish on Sep 27, 2013 - 55 answers

Marriage & Work Filter, opposing schedules edition

What non-obvious effects can I expect if I take a job with hours that are very different from my wife's? [more inside]
posted by jon1270 on Aug 31, 2013 - 21 answers

What is going on here? (Relationship clarity)

Some advice needed on a newly poly marriage...issues regarding imbalance of resources/effort, feelings of rejection, control issues, etc Please PM me if you think that will be more helpful. [more inside]
posted by queenba on Aug 15, 2013 - 41 answers

Suggestions for Ceremony lines

Wedding in 5 weeks. We still haven't figured out any of the script for our wedding. The officient sent us a handful of sample ceremonies, but none of them really feel like us. The "I ______ take thee _________ to be my wife/husband, for richer or poorer" etc vows we are totally stuck on, and frankly the ring exchange lines are also sticking us up too. Please help. The green always has such creative suggestions! Don't fail me now! [more inside]
posted by PuppetMcSockerson on Aug 7, 2013 - 24 answers

How hard should reconciliation be?

My wife and I separated at the end of last year for a three-month period. We've now ended our separation and have moved back in together. Whilst things are often wonderful, they're equally as often stressful and hard work. My question is: how hard should it be? Snowflakes, wall-of-text inside. [more inside]
posted by yasp on Jul 24, 2013 - 28 answers

What are good boundaries for married opposite sex friends?

I have a close male friend and our closeness bothers my husband, which bothers me because I care about how he feels. Happy couples, what are things you think are okay and not okay for your spouse to do with someone else? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2013 - 58 answers

Small town bachelor party

Bachelor party, challenge level: wholesome time, tiny Midwestern town, Thursday night, 7 people total, best man (me) arriving in town a few hours before. [more inside]
posted by gregoryg on Apr 22, 2013 - 15 answers

Marriage upgrade

For reasons of being an international same-sex couple, we want to be as married as we possibly can get. For the same reasons, the legal status of our relationship is giving us a headache. What we are currently trying to figure out is, if we have a California certificate of registered domestic partnership but want to get a Massachusetts marriage license, do we have to get domestic-divorced before we can get Massachusetts-married? [more inside]
posted by harujion on Apr 20, 2013 - 4 answers

Finding a wedding officiant on (very) short notice in Portland, OR?

My fiancé and I have decided to elope. We want to get married on April Fool's day (aka Monday), as we're fools in love. We have a marriage license. What we don't have is an officiant. [more inside]
posted by seesaw on Mar 29, 2013 - 9 answers

What happened to churches that refused to hold interracial weddings?

Around the time that the Supreme Court decided Loving v. Virginia, did any churches lose their tax exempt status either due to (A) political activities related to the fight over interracial marriage or (B) due to the refusal to conduct such marriages for its members? [more inside]
posted by jepler on Mar 25, 2013 - 21 answers

Spock loves Kirk but fails miserably as Troi

Dear Vulcan Homeworld, I want to learn how to converse better with my wife. Currently my overly-logical thought and speech patterns upset her, frequently in ways I'm unable even to predict. She deserves better. I've struggled on my own to come up with dozens of different approaches, all of which have ultimately failed in different ways, so I come to you for help. [more inside]
posted by blue_and_bronze on Mar 12, 2013 - 39 answers

How to Deal with Maybe-Possible-Impending Marriage Proposal

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little under 3 years, and we have lived together for over one year. We are in our late twenties. We are extremely compatible 90% of the time, have so much fun together, are mutually supportive, generally very communicative, and love each other deeply. We get along with each others' families, we travel and live well together, and we share so many interests. I am ready to marry the man, and he is maybe/kinda/sorta ready to marry me. Ouch! [more inside]
posted by tentwentythirty on Feb 22, 2013 - 57 answers

Laid Off Spouse

My husband just got laid off from his position today. It's with a large company and he had excellent reviews but their revenue stream has not been up to par. They told him his position has been eliminated. However, he is welcome to reapply if and when blah, blah, blah... My concern is what is the right way to help him. He has never been laid off before and for the most part never thought this could happen. He is very optimistic by nature. He does seem a little shell shocked. My job is not going to be able to support our family. What are the first things we should do? I am also concerned about his mental well being and being a supportive partner while he looks for a new job. To make matters worse (or whatever) we have one in college, one applying to colleges, one getting ready to apply, and one freshman in high school.
posted by lasamana on Feb 22, 2013 - 25 answers

I'm 36 and immature in love. How can I get some grown up perspective?

I am happily married but have fallen in love with someone else. I think the intensity of my feelings for this other man is due to the fact that I’ve only ever been in one relationship before; I think I am experiencing this the way a teenager would. How do I get over this ‘in love’ feeling? [more inside]
posted by Lollie1974 on Feb 8, 2013 - 14 answers

Page: 1 2 3