Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with manager

Please help me figure out this snowflake-looking career pickle.

drea — Thu, 02 May 2013 03:21:36 -0800

I'm a manager in my field who, in moving to a new city, got into. Things were looking great, but unexpectedly the company shut down two weeks in. Now I'm looking for a managerial job again, and I need to know how to explain this. Coming from a senior management position in one city, I moved to another. The whole job search process took a grueling six months. At the last minute the offers started coming in. One of them was an offer for a management title -- with a way lower salary than my previous job -- albeit from the most recognizable company in the country.

The job that I did end up taking was a specialist position in the same department but a new field. The pay was higher than what I was earning in my last job. I loved my job and the people right away. But all of us got laid off when I was about to cap off my second week into the job.

Now, I'm looking for management positions again, but I don't know how to explain my career move by taking a specialist position in a way that will paint me better than just being "after the money". It just seems like a bad move to just settle back into a nonmanagerial position and for less pay: a one step forward, three steps backward situation that I don't think I'd be able to recover from. I can't move back into my old city, either; there's a reason I left.

TL;DR question: from senior manager to specialist and now looking for a management job again: how do I make it happen without looking unsuitable?

Question title? I can't even think of my own title!

moons in june — Wed, 01 May 2013 08:28:01 -0800

Hope me Hivemind, I need a title for my business card! I work as a bookseller in an independent bookstore. I used to manage our location that recently closed, but now I'm at the main store. So my business card used to say:

Moons In June
Bookseller

Store Manager
Location City

Address
Phone
Email

The owner wants to make me a new card that doesn't have our old location on them, but as I'm no longer store manager I need a title to go in the third line where "Store Manager" used to be!

This bookstore is unique in that there are three "back of house" people who do all the shipping/receiving/ordering, and three "front of house" people who sell books and run the store. I'm a front of house, and the two other FOHers have "Store Manager" and "Night Manager" on their cards. I have slightly less duties than Mr. Store Manager and slightly more duties than Mr. Night Manager. The main one is salesperson, but creative stuff like making displays, arranging the store, signs, general prettifying usually falls to me. I also do the usual stuff, inventory, shelving, "curating" our selection, cleaning, arranging in-store events and so on.

The owner insists that my card has more than just Bookseller as my title, but for the life of me I can't think of what it should say. So I turn to you.

Thanks, hivemind.

PS, it doesn't have to be stuffy or serious, but it should be descriptive.

Do I need a bookkeeper, an accountant or someone else???

buddylove — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 13:18:50 -0800

I have come to the conclusion that I am bad with money, and I need help. The question is, who can provide me with the help I need. I've researched various professions online and have a hard time telling who would best suit my needs: a bookkeeper, an accountant, a financial counselor, a daily money manager, someone else entirely?? More than one of these?? Here's a little about my situation: I have a small business and, of course, my own household to run. For the small business end of things, I would like someone to:

Keep records of what my clients owe and whether they have paid me
Provide invoices to my clients upon client request
Make sure my bills are paid on time every time
Make sure my business bank account does not overdraft
Estimate how much I need to set aside for taxes and help me set it aside
Help me file and pay my taxes
Tell me whether putting myself on my own payroll is a good idea, and help me do it if that's what I should do
Review financial documents, balance accounts, check for errors and alert me to things I need to know about
Help me find ways to save money/avoid financial pitfalls

For the personal side of things, I would like someone to:

Make sure my bills get paid on time all the time/avoid late fees and overdraft fees
Help me budget and save for retirement, vacations, car repairs, vet bills, computer replacements and emergencies
Make sure that parking tickets get paid before accruing late fees
Budgeting
Help me develop a plan for paying down debt
Help me make sure that my car gets registered on time annually
Review financial documents, balance accounts, check for errors and alert me to things I need to know about
Help me find ways to save money/avoid financial pitfalls

I have tried doing this on my own for years, with moderate success. I have tried lots of different software programs (Quicken, MoneyDance, YNAB, Mint). I have set things up on automatic bill pay. But inevitably, something falls through the cracks and causes me a great deal of stress. I don't want to be completely absent from the process. Ideally, someone else would manage most of this and sit down with me once a month to show me what they've done, ask and answer questions and make suggestions for what to do next.

I know that there are people out there who find this kind of thing easy or even fun. I am not one of them. I am good at my job, but bad with anything having to do numbers, spreadsheets and filing cabinets. So, who can help me with this stuff? A bookkeeper, an accountant, a daily money manager?? Does anyone have suggestions for specific people?? I live in the Bay Area.

Thanks for your help!

Saying "That won't be possible" isn't really possible

Anonymous — Tue, 05 Mar 2013 08:16:20 -0800

The question: Should I provide a lukewarm reference for my recently fired ex-manager to avoid awkwardness? Or should I tell him no, and if so, what is the code language to use? I can't say "Sorry, that won't be possible" for reasons outlined herein. The story:

My manager recently left my small company by "mutual decision." I know for a fact he was fired; part of the impetus for the CEO and COO firing him was that he was a poor manager and largely incompetent at his core, non-management job skills. I think he is so un self-aware that he believes it really was a mutual decision. It's clear he does not know 1) he was a bad manager, or 2) that I and my teammate were told by the CEO and COO that they fired him in part so that we would stay.

This ex-manager is a very nice person, not malicious, a schmoozer/biz dev kind of guy, completely ineffectual as a manager, does not take initiative to keep abreast of our niche industry, isn't as skilled as my teammate and I at what he was hired for, and kind of dippy. It seems he's continually failed upward through the years. And my CEO, to smooth the firing, offered to help the ex-manager by giving him good references. The CEO does not want bad blood in our niche industry, which in our city has a lot of cross-hiring throughout the years because the pool of qualified people is pretty small.

Now the ex-manager has asked my teammate and me to give him good references as a manager. Neither of us feels he was a good manager. I've been avoiding it for several days but would like to give him an answer.

I don't feel comfortable saying "Sorry, that won't be possible" because I'll continue to see him everywhere at industry events. In the future, it's not impossible he'd be working for a theoretical company I really want to work at.

If I give a positive recommendation, I'm just helping to close off more potential management doors for me to transition into. (I'm a woman, so there's a bit of resentment on my part and assumption that part of the reason he's failed upward is because he's a man, whether that is fair or true.) I really resent the fact this person has been allowed to move through multiple management positions--each lasting less than two years--earning a higher and higher salary each time, with few core skills or management skills. As I'm typing this I'm remember his ungraciously taking credit for the work done by my teammate and me, even though that is not at all the culture in this workplace. Oh, and I'm also remembering how at my annual review he vaguely intimated some things that weren't true and then refused to provide examples--which I reported to the COO because it was now part of my employment record here. I can't say that was a part of why he was let go, but it's part and parcel of his being a shitty manager.

It doesn't seem ethical to tell him I'll give a positive recommendation and then tell the hiring company something overtly negative. I won't do it.

If I tell him no, I can't do it, how can I preserve a decent chance at non-awkwardness? If I tell him yes and then give only a lukewarm recommendation, is that terrible? Do people do that? Is there secret code language I can use to make it clear on the surface I think he's a super nice guy to have around the office, but not to expect him to be good at anything?

A manager I work with - not MY manager - is....odd.

Anonymous — Wed, 13 Feb 2013 14:59:41 -0800

I work closely with another team and their manager in my job. The manager has started some weird, what feel like, personal attacks on me. In case you want to skip the long explanation inside, basically the question is how to deal with a manager who is not my manager (but I am expected to work with anyway) and has a very abrasive style which is kind of offensive. This manager is friends with the big boss and was personally recruited as a friend so there is nil chance of her leaving.

I am on a team that works closely with another team. I am expected to work closely with the manager of the other team, which is fine. She is relatively new and so far has mostly left my team alone.

Today I had a client meeting with a colleague from the other team and this manager decided to sit in on the meeting, which she does sometimes, I assume, to see how her employees work. The meeting was perfect, the client was happy. Not one problem. Afterward, the manager kept us (me and my colleague, not the client) there and started grilling me on an aspect of the client's account. She was asking about what is a common concern with clients, but did not in the meeting and has in fact never come up at all with this particular client. There is a very reasonable and valid response to this concern, which she could have just asked directly (i.e. "how do you respond to people when Issue X comes up?"). That would have been no problem.

Instead, she launched what felt like a personal attack on my work over a process which she clearly did not fully understand. It was so far out of left field that I was stunned. This went on for five minutes in which she put me on the defensive by seeming to suggest I have done something wrong (which I have not). Then she ended by saying - I know what you're thinking, but you need to understand how the client would see this and how it could reflect our relationship. I said - I do understand, I address this issue all the time. This is very common. It's actually not much of an issue but clients don't understand that until I explain the process to them fully. Please don't suggest that I don't get it because I understand perfectly.

My colleague also thought the manager was out of line in the meeting and said she did not think that I did anything wrong or acted inappropriately.

I went to my actual manager afterwards and told him that she had unexpectedly kind of launched what felt like a very personal attack on me in a meeting. I said if there is any problem with my work or performance, I definitely want to hear it, but if she can't constructively tell me, I would like it if she would take it to him - my actual manager - and let him decide. The reason is she has never done my job and doesn't fully understand it, though she thinks she does. He did my job for years and I know he understands. I trust his judgement. He agreed with me that she can come off as condescending, passive-aggressive and rude and said he would talk to her.

When I got out of the meeting with my manager, I saw that she had emailed me and my other colleague in our meeting an article that she said was sent to her by someone and she thought we might find it interesting. It was about challenges faced by people who work in my industry and was bizarre because it was another thing that had not come up in what had been a very good client meeting and was also not the topic that she brought up with me. I literally at this point had no idea what her point was and what she was trying to say. She has never otherwise emailed me.

I don't know what to do because I'm supposed to have a "dotted line" reporting to her. I almost feel like she has a personal vendetta against me for I don't know what reasons as I haven't interacted with her a lot.

She has not been received well by any of the people on her team since she started because they feel she is a micromanager and unwilling to listen to them. I know some people are documenting what they feel is inappropriate behavior.

This is not an isolated incident. She has had interactions with her employees that have shown questionable judgement.

I am a female and I am very cognizant of the uphill battles that female managers can face, especially in my male dominated industry. I like to think that I really try to be fair in my treatment of them and not try to be unfair by not holding them to different standards than I would male managers. I would never say that I have problems working with women, in fact I think I have really good relationships with the other women I work with. I did tell this to my manager as I don't want to make this some sort of a bitchy woman thing (which I have never done or felt in my life).

My question: how do I deal with her in the future if she starts this kind of thing again with me? It's hard for me to articulate what the problem is. I like to think I am very open to criticism and feedback - I've gotten plenty in the past - but I can't tell if she is totally wrong and out of order (what I would like to think and what other people think) or if she is genuinely concerned about something I'm doing. One of my colleagues said that if she does it again I should tell her that is she has a problem with something I'm doing we can set up a meeting with my manager and all three of us can talk about it. I don't want to be combative or belligerent but I also can't tell if she is personally attacking me or if she genuinely does not realize how she is coming off and how offensive it can be to suggest I don't understand a pretty basic part of my job that I've been doing for 10 years.

Fwiw, my manager said he is very happy with me and he thinks I am great at what I do. My formal review is in a few weeks but he gave no indication that there were any problems with my performance.

End of the road...oh no, more road.

Anonymous — Fri, 25 Jan 2013 09:11:00 -0800

How do I stop sabotaging my own plans to leave a badly fitting job? I joined a corporate organisation in 2008 because I wanted to pay off debt and save. I'd previously been a contractor in cultural institutions/non-profits and the adjustment period was really hard but I stuck it out to avoid being a flake and promised myself I'd move on soon.

2.5 years ago I was promoted to manager and although the first year was an interesting challenge I've been unhappy for pretty much the entire time since. I do like my colleagues but I'm uncomfortable managing people who were previously team mates. I also have next to no interest in the industry my job supports and the vast majority of my work revolves around the endless re-specification of a sprawling org-wide IT infrastructure project that my team has a small stake in, at the cost of the actual front end work we're supposed to be concentrating on. Churn (outside of my team) is high, restructures happen almost on a six monthly basis and I feel utterly burnt out.

So quit right? Except I can't seem to do it.

I tried the 'get a new job first' route. In April last year I applied for and was offered a similar gig that paid much more, but I turned it down as the company felt 'too corporate'. In September I again applied for and was offered a similar type of job but back in the kind of creative institution I would have given my right arm to work at 5 years ago. I actually got as far as accepting the job and handing in my notice - only to rescind a week later out of panic that I'd oversold myself and the role would be beyond me. I think I'm really just afraid of finding myself back in this position if I take any job I appear to be qualified for.

I applied for lots of less senior posts too but didn't get short-listed for interview. I even toned down my application for an internship at a big museum that had previously offered me a job back when I was contracting but didn't get so much as an acknowledgement. Having hired people to work in my own team I know how weird it is to get senior people applying for junior posts.

I'm now feeling so disenfranchised I want to cry constantly. The sheer effort of maintaining this veneer of caring about the work we do has worn me out. I feel like a terrible, horrible person for effectively lying to colleagues (of whom I'm generally very fond) for over five years. I feel I took a wrong turn at a critical junction five years ago and it's too late to go back. I'm 37 and seemingly too senior now for most front line production work back in my old sector but I don't have the confidence or practical chops to take on a management role there either. I can't access how I really feel about any of this any more and I feel like I'm barely alive.

Originally I'd promised myself that I'd only stick out the job until debts were paid and a specific amount was saved. I've built up three times that original sum and long since paid of that debt, with another six-months emergency fund on the side, yet every time a (self-imposed) deadline to quit comes up it slides past. I have no dependants and my job has a three month notice period so it's not like I'd be in penury in two weeks if I did quit but still I can't bring myself to do it.

I saw a therapist for nearly a year to help me move on, but all that seemed to happen was I talked my self even harder into staying. I have no idea what to do any more - I feel I have no skills other than pretending really effectively. I cry at the thought of Monday mornings and coming back after Christmas was so awful I actually called in sick for three days. I feel irritable and angry a lot of the time.

What the hell is wrong with me? How do I stop sabotaging my own plans? Has anyone else been through this? What did you do to make yourself move on?

10-year plans don't say what needs to be done tomorrow.

Anonymous — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 15:59:11 -0800

How can I better "manage my managers" who can only think in the long-term? They have lots of really great ideas which never go anywhere because they don't schedule people to work on them. I work in a very small company for a couple, one of which is sometimes in the office. They have wonderful plans for their company, and the employees all agree we have great goals, but we are getting more and more frustrated that we never get to work on them because we are stuck doing day-to-day and/or fire-fighting stuff. I understand this is the money-making side, but to be honest we're only just breaking even. The bosses think their new ideas could be much better money makers, but they don't seem to understand that they need to invest some employee time into research and development to make them really happen. We really can't do what they're suggesting without significant changes to our schedules.

How can I/we talk to them about this? What phrases can I use? I have already suggested we need to build a 'roadmap' and I think they understand that. But every couple weeks there is some new idea, we all chat about it, and then nothing gets done. How can we all break out of this frustrating cycle?

It's Not Me, It's You

Anonymous — Wed, 16 Jan 2013 18:34:52 -0800

I'm asking this question because I can't really verbalize it as well as I'd like to since I'm trying to look at it from all perspectives. I've been under the management or oversight for a couple of total assholes this past year and a half. The first was the director of the graduate program I am on leave from, and the second is my current boss, a cafe owner. The first had fairly exaggerated expectations in regards to work and study (he himself is more of a scholar than a leader. I'm academically inclined but do not see the point of most of the effort.) I was up for a graduate fellowship (recipient chosen by him) and didn't get it despite my best academic and work efforts. I was just not his favorite. I also had quite a bit of performance anxiety and am fairly certain I sabotaged a few projects due to the unusual amount of pressure I was under.

Last summer, I took a job at a fancy little beer cafe specifically because I knew the owner was a nit picky jerk, just like the director of my graduate program. I wanted to learn how to work with people like him since I seem to come across so many (my partner is also like that; it took me a long time to stop being so defensive when he criticizes me). It has mostly been a nightmare; he's a chronic micro-manager who is so obviously bi-polar. He's made me cry many, many times. All of my coworkers are aware that he is a jerk, but many of them are close to him and seem to do well within the business. But dear lord, is he fucking cray-cray. He's trying to create the best coffeehouse in town, and is trying REALLY HARD to replicate uber hipster coffeebars (some of which I have worked previous, which is why he hired me). He's not really that cool enough and I don't respect most of his efforts since it seems to drive customers away. He won't let me make coffee because I steamed up some soy the wrong way on one of his bad days and he told me I was not allowed to make coffee anymore. I won't go into too much detail, but it's the little things that add up really fast and I constantly feel like he thinks I'm dumb or incompetent. He nickpicks me about reading a paper in the back room for a second between chores (really, I was dumping it into the recycling but wanted to glance over an article), but won't speak to his other employees about drinking beer while working (Oh dear, I would never do that, I'm not 21 anymore.)

Details aside, I'm just wondering why some flourish under people like my director and boss, and why some like me flounder and run for happier grounds. I'm quite aware that I have some self-esteem issues, but I'm not convinced this is entirely why I do horribly around micro-managing nit-pickers. I thought taking this job would shed some light on the whole "you don't respect me I'm outta here" attitude I've had about jobs my whole life, and am trying to create a stronger work-ethic while learning coping skills when around hard-to-please managers. I avoid these people like the plague when at work, at it totally backfires because they can feel that I want nothing to do with them. Hence the extra negative attention. I feel like a failure in that I can't make this person realize I'm good at what I do, and I come home exhausted.

Or- this is another perspective- am I not trying hard enough? I get discouraged really easily, and fail to see that "Please like what I do" aspects that go into working for very detail oriented people. I'm at a point in my life where I feel like I've failed at or quit way too many things. Should I tell the litte voice inside that's saying "what's the point" to stuff it and try harder?

I KNOW that this is just a shitty barista dead end job; very well aware and am not looking to be a professional barista. It's the way I go about work and relationships that I am wanting to improve so that I could maybe have a shot at a better outcome in my later pursuits.

I want to quit, but don't want to run away when things get dicey.

fiance and product management

pakora1 — Mon, 31 Dec 2012 16:46:40 -0800

Financial modeling for product managers I am looking for a book that explains/teaches product managers the financial modeling (calculations) they would need on the job.

The basic idea is to figure out how product managers use finance in their jobs. Would prefer the book to be more tactical, hands on rather than subjective or abstract. Something with templates/exercise, real life examples.

Thank you

Do you use Kanban for personal productivity?

zooropa — Wed, 26 Dec 2012 17:05:25 -0800

Do you use Kanban as your personal productivity system? Greetings, everyone!

I'm curious to know if you use Kanban. I just started working as a senior manager with five direct reports in a Fortune 100 company, so getting a handle on both my task and project management skills has become critical.

Over the years, I've used various systems like FranklinCovey, GTD, and Total Workday Control. Although no particular system has stuck, I've picked up various techniques over the years from each that have become part of my routine.

I'm not a developer, but I'm fascinated by Lean, Agile, etc. and want to try to apply them to marketing knowledge work. What especially interests me the most about Kanban is the idea of simplifying task management down to its barest essentials (backlog, doing, done).

Right now, I'm most interested in personal task management using Kanban.

How do you manage all that email and keep your kanban updated?

I get how Kanban is used for managing projects. But what about individual Next Actions that aren't necessarily tied to a project (e.g., "Answer the phone.")

Any assistance would be gratefully appreciated.

At your service,
Michael

boss destroying morale

swimmingly — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 08:24:46 -0800

We like our jobs but toxic manager is gutting us. It feels awful because we can't perform to our full potential when she's around and feel like we have no career prospects. How can we help ourselves? I work with a small team and we report to one manager. She is fairly new at managing and only moved up into the number one role in the division slightly over a year ago.

Her management style includes:

1. Consistently not giving clear instructions. Her sentences often beat around the bush and fail to include nouns/subjects, almost as though she expects us to read her mind.

2. A habit of talking over the ends of our sentences and trying to complete them for us. If I say, "I don't think this will work", she will say "work" a split second after I start saying the word. This is more like a personal tic rather than a management tactic, admittedly, but it suggests lack of listening.

3. Doesn't seem to be able to stand up to the other managers/bosses at the firm. They have a meeting every day. Prior to the meeting, she will give each of us (vague) instructions on what to do for the day. Typically, after the meetings, she often returns with a different set of objectives and instructions, based on the comments from the others. Again, she fails to communicate the new instructions clearly, which often results in last-minute changes.

4. Tends to overcommit my team, during these meetings. She will often promise things that we cannot reasonably deliver on deadline without superhuman amounts of effort. After we put in this amount of effort, the new project could still die because someone else makes another comment and she wavers again.

5. Gives us a lot of extra work to do, because she is paranoid about what might happen if some projects fall through. In comparison, managers of other similar units in the firm do not feel the need to do this. Often, the extra work gets done, but never actually used by her. So a lot of time and effort is wasted that we could have spent developing our own good projects.

6. Irrational fear of losing her job. This probably is one of the reasons for the overpromising and apparent spinelessness in the face of the other managers/bosses.

7. Tends to panic a lot and passes on the stress to us. When we are working on our individual projects, she will often come around and hover and micromanage. Close to the deadline, she will suddenly think up changes that many of us feel are unnecessary, and make us do them. Doesn't add that much to the overall quality of the project.

8. Because of the overcommitment and constant wavering on her part, it feels as though our tasks and timelines are always being changed. These changes happen with increasing frequency as the original deadline approaches, since she panics.

9. Uses emotional manipulation to make us do more work. For instance, she will say, "If you don't do X, then Bob will have to do it." Then the target employee, who is friends with Bob since we are a tight-knit team, will be guilt-tripped into taking on additional workload. Which may not even be necessary since she might not actually need the extra stuff. Again, it's a "cover my ass" thing for her, at our expense.

10. Tries to put on a sympathetic show whenever she gives us more things to do. For instance, she will come around to our tables, put on a sad face, then ramble on about nothing in particular until she finally comes to the point when she says, "Could you do something about XYZ". We would rather she go straight to the point and not make sad faces at us for several minutes prior.

As a result of the above, we do not feel that she is a manager who will stand up for us, or filter out the crap from the rest of the company. Her tactics are causing us significant amounts of stress, and burnout symptoms. We have lost respect for her as well.

In contrast, when she goes on leave and her deputy takes over, things get so much better for us because the deputy is more confident, calmer, clearer and sharper. We stop feeling miserable all the time and are more productive. However, there is no chance in the near future that she will leave and the deputy will take over.

She has an avoidant personality, which means that she's unlikely to have a chat with us anytime soon. Whether in a group, or one-on-one. She has said before that she feels uncomfortable in situations where she has to sit down and talk with employees. This means that if we want to raise any issues to her, we will have to specifically request a meeting with her, which will likely put her on the defensive.

We do want to have a talk with her on how we can change things, but how can we tell her about the things that are going wrong without making it seem like a personal criticism? (even though it kind of is...) We don't want to offend her or hurt her feelings or put her on the defensive.

However, if having a talk with her is something that we shouldn't presume to do, then what else can we do? Assume that none of us wants to quit purely because of her, and that transfer requests will be denied. So we're kind of stuck in this situation.

Would appreciate any advice you can give. Thanks!

Do you have advice or books to recommend for a first-time manager?

zooropa — Tue, 11 Dec 2012 15:05:57 -0800

Newbie Managerfilter: Do you have advice for a first-time manager? I just started a new job at a major Fortune 100 company. It's a terrific role and a great opportunity. I'm very excited.

For the first time, I will be managing a team made up of at least four (possibly five) direct reports. I'm in my late-30's (downward slope toward 40) and all are at least 10 years younger than me. Previously, I've managed handfuls of interns and small teams of one or two, but this is the first time I'm responsible for growing a team, nurturing them, and helping them walk a career path.

What's the best book you would recommend for a first-time manager?
What's the best advice you ever received when you were a first-time manager?

Preparing to be a manager?

Anonymous — Mon, 03 Dec 2012 14:46:12 -0800

Questions for my boss's boss about preparing to be a manager? My current boss is pushing me to enter management at a medium-large tech company. It's not something I imagined myself doing when I joined (for many reasons similar to this) but after a couple of project cycles of being a technical-lead I'd like to step out of my comfort zone and figure out whether it's my thing... or whether I'll be just another victim of the Peter Principle.
My boss is on vacation but I'll soon have the opportunity to meet his boss for an Informal Discussion. A couple of questions I'm preparing are specific to my division, but I'm having trouble coming up with more general "what am I doing here"/"what's it like" ones.
What should I ask about preparing to be a manager?

How do I ask my manager for connections for a new job in a new city without killing my chances for a promotion?

Anonymous — Sun, 02 Dec 2012 06:21:32 -0800

How do I ask my manager for connections for a new job in a new city without killing my chances for a promotion? Long story short, I have a pretty good hunch that my manager is also on the prowl for a new job due to some happenings in the workplace. Those details are less relevant, but one time during our scheduled 1:1, I was subtle and suggested that I wanted to live in City X at some point in time in the future and he had mentioned how people in our group know people in that city, including himself (i.e. he can introduce me to people for job connections).

Well, the kiss of death (in terms of promotions) in our group comes when it becomes known that you are looking for a way out (whether it be through a new job search, or that you're planning on going to business school). Once management learns this, your chances of getting promoted essentially become nil.

So, the tricky part is that while I would like to start making moves for a new job in City X by the summer of 2013, I don't know how to go about this without ruining my chances for a promotion come summer time, which is when promotions take place.

For what it's worth, I'm an entry level analyst and my promotion (if I were to get one) would simply be senior analyst.. so it's not a huge deal, but it'd be nice to put on my resume that I got promoted, ya know?

I'm also currently on a project with my manager and I've been doing very well, so our relationship has improved dramatically in the past couple of weeks. Part of me thinks that if I were to let him know I'm looking for a way out, he WOULDN'T tell senior management because he is too (and the reason he's leaving is due to his own dissatisfaction at senior management; sort of like he'd be looking out for me by keeping it hush-hush), but that's not something I can take for granted.

So... how do I structure my conversation with my manager and basically ask for connections for a new job? Literally, what do I say/ask? I have another 1:1 with him next week and I'd like to spend that time having this conversation.

Thanks!

I want to be an awesome manager. What books should I be reading?

Anonymous — Sat, 06 Oct 2012 17:09:51 -0800

I want to be an awesome manager. What books should I be reading? I work for a start-up. The entire company is about 200 employees, and I am a new manager to about 30 of them.

What books -- both "classics" and new-school stuff -- should I be reading to give me a well-rounded understanding of what good managers do (and don't do)? Things geared towards start-ups would be especially good.

Tips for managing while ADHD?

roscopcoletrane — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 09:46:06 -0800

I have finally gotten myself promoted to manager -- sweet! I have ADHD -- crap! Have you been in this situation before? What worked for you? Help me figure out how to not just survive, but thrive! I've been diagnosed for roughly 12 years, so I'm very well-acquainted with the challenges of living with ADHD. I've slowly, slowly been getting better at life, but I still have bad days (and weeks, sometimes months). I feel like I can barely manage myself at work, but I've also learned that I am my harshest critic, and overall people think that I'm pretty good at my job, and they tolerate the occasional missed deadline.

But now I'm a manager, and I'm responsible for managing the one person who reports to me, and also for looking to the future and growing the team and our capabilities. To make things more complicated, we're a user experience design team, and our role is relatively new, undefined, and poorly understood, and my manager doesn't have much experience in growing a UX team so while I have his support, he's really looking to me to tell him how we should grow the team. Which is awesome, dont' get me wrong -- I'm psyched for the opportunity and mostly I'm just afraid of screwing things up.

My biggest struggle right now is that the two of us are the only in-house designers in the entire company (approx. 160 people), so we get a lot of little one-off requests from all over the company. I'm really struggling to keep track of them, and I also struggle to have a good sense of what our full workload is because it feels like it's constantly in flux. I originally started this question to get suggestions for how to address that specific issue, but I'm also open to any advice you have for for managing while ADHD!

Idiopathic delayed note syndrome

The Elusive Architeuthis — Wed, 12 Sep 2012 11:58:43 -0800

I supervise a person who has enormous difficulty finishing her case notes. My efforts to remediate her so far have been unsuccessful. How can I help her finish her work? I am the supervisor for a clinical worker. Like most clinicians, each visit with a patient is documented in a note in the record, which has to be signed to complete it. We switched over to an electronic medical record with computerized notes a few months ago, and after an initial period of difficulty and grumbling, almost everyone in the group achieved a rhythm where they finished their notes after their patient session or at most a few days afterwards. However, this person seems to be incapable of actually signing her notes, leaving them to accumulate in her inbox.

She is very nice, but generally kind of anxious and inefficient person who is bad at multitasking. She has been here for a very long time, and is generally beloved by her patients--spending lots of time talking with them in person and on the phone. Her patient sessions usually run over time by at least 1 hour. However, she is very good at the clinical aspects of her work, just not the record keeping. This person has always had difficulty finishing her notes, but when we had paper charts the sheer accumulation would usually get her to finish them up in a few days. Now there is no physical presence clogging up her desk.

The problem is that those notes MUST BE FINISHED. There are legal, regulatory and billing issues around having things unsigned for long periods, and she's way out of any reasonable grace period on most of these. My institution does not have a formal policy on this though--apparently they are in the process of writing one, but it's slow going. So far higher-level intervention in the case has taken the form of my superiors asking me to get her to finish stuff.

I've looked at the notes, and they're very detailed and pretty complete. Most of them just need a couple of concluding sentences and an electronic signature. I have looked at them with her, and if these were my notes it would take no longer than 5 minutes to complete each one. It is apparently taking her an average of about 25 minutes to complete a single note (which are already 90% done), which, no wonder she's falling behind (to the tune of 500+ unsigned notes at the moment).

I let things go on too long before getting really hardnosed about it, because she had some very significant stressors in her personal life earlier this year, and I honestly did think she would get caught up. I think there is a very substantial component of shame and perfectonism going on, and possibly also some actual compulsiveness, but I'm not sure how to help her.
I've talked to her about it on multiple, multiple occasions and she always says the same thing, which is that she was behind for X reason but is starting to get caught up now and she just needs to take some time on the weekends, etc. Meanwhile she continues to fall behind. Here's what I've done at this point:

-she has agreed to complete 50 notes per week. So far this is a big failure; she's still falling further behind.

- we are meeting on a weekly basis for a progress check. Again, so far this is unsuccessful.

-I've found time to give her the equivalent of a week just to complete some of her backlog of notes. (These days are mostly upcoming--the scheduling required some time to set up). But this is obviously not a long-term solution.

-She already works less than full time.

-She understands why she needs to have these done and that she is risking both her job and the practice's accreditation

-I and another manager have met with her to make sure she is comfortable with the EMR system. She hasn't learned a lot of the expert tips/tricks, but she is comfortable with all the basics.

-I've tried to give her help on structuring her time, focusing on essentials, setting external limits on how long she works on a single document (I suggested using a timer).

-I have considered completing some of these for her, and just have her look them over and sign off on them, but I have a lot of my own work to do and can't really do it in the numbers she needs.

I do not have the power to fire this person directly, although probably I could make it happen if I showed that she had failed remediation efforts, but I would really rather not. She is well-liked, a good clinician, and has had a very rough year. But the number of unsigned notes stretching back months is approaching the ludicrous and attracting unwelcome attention from higher administration.

What else can I do to help her 1) finish her astounding backlog of unfinished work, and 2) stay on top of new notes? I'm running out of managerial tricks.

Is Motel Manager a Decent Job for Me Based on my Goals??

Piscean — Sun, 09 Sep 2012 16:55:46 -0800

Through a friend I have been offered the opportunity to work at a "mom and pop" 60 bed motel that has a fitness center, pool, and serves meals. It averages decent ratings from guests. I'm up for the challenge but I'm no spring chicken. I lost a good paying position in the recession in 208 and subsequently had to drop out of a Ph.D program just before comps- and it looks like I won't be finishing that degree any time soon, because I currently work in a call center and can't even afford a car. One of my dissertation interests is urban agriculture and housing communities set up to support it. I'd love the opportunity to work alongside community designers to plan and/or design and/or run such a community. I figure that work in fields somehow related to such an endeavor would be helpful since I can't afford to return to school.

The motel job is is live-in and would give me experience in property management, which I think would be very helpful. The pay is HORRID but includes room and board and internet. I wouldn't need a car, and I'm hoping I can get at least breakfasts out of the deal!

Basically the only reason I'm considering such a job is to put a management position back on my resume and to gain experience for my career goals. I do have experience as a travel agent and in management, but not enough to impress employers.

My questions to people with this type of experience run along the lines of: What is it really like to work as a live-in motel manager? Does it look good on a resume? Would this kind of experience help me with the career goals I've mentioned? What skills will I be building? What makes a great motel manager? How can I parlay this position into something better paying down the road? What are the pros and cons?

This call center job does not use my best skills and is a go-nowhere job. The pay is good for the current economy, however, and I have health insurance - plus I can walk there. I won't leave my current job if a motel manager position won't move me toward my goals.

what is a downthemall equivalent for safari

citybuddha — Tue, 21 Aug 2012 08:26:38 -0800

Mac osx 10.6. Sick of the spinning ball when I use firefox. Slowly moving to safari however I am married to some of the mozilla plugins. What is a downthemall equivalent for safari that is free? Thanks hive

Password manager for Windows and Android?

WinnipegDragon — Tue, 21 Aug 2012 07:54:28 -0800

I'm looking for a password manager that will work seamlessly across multiple PCs and my Android phone. It seems like there are a hundred options for these applications, but I'm wondering if anyone has had success with an application across multiple platforms and systems.

Specifically, I want it to work with my XP desktop at work, Windows 7 laptop, home PC and server, and my Android phone. I assume this means I need a service that can store the password database online or something that can be stored on DropBox which I also use.

How open can/should I be with my boss/manager?

6spd — Sun, 19 Aug 2012 12:54:18 -0800

How open can/should I be with my boss/manager? I was chatting with a fellow co-worker the other day and after I had told her how glad I was to have completed an 8-month project that really put a damper on my social life, she said that were she in my position, she would have told her manager that she was unhappy with the project and whatnot.

At first I disagreed with her because I feel that you shouldn't give hints about being unhappy at work or that you're complaining or have a bad attitude, etc. So during my time on the project, I always told my manager I was doing fine and that things were great when we had our check-ins, but truthfully, I was dissatisfied with the project in terms of the nature of the work and the people I was working with (I was the only entry level employee on the project and everyone else was way older than me and married, etc, so I could never really relate to them and I just felt incredibly lonely and isolated).

So where do you draw the line with being open and telling your manager how you truly feel about things at the workplace and what are some things you should hide? Obviously you don't want to say bad things about other people, or that you're looking to jump ship to a different job, but in my example above, should I have told my manager about the aspects of that project that left me feeling unhappy?

For what it's worth, I'm in management consulting so it's a very competitive, cut-throat atmosphere so I don't want to come off as weak and whiney.. but if I can improve my quality of life by being open and honest with my manager, it seems worth it.

I've only been in the workforce for a year so I'm still very new to navigating office politics. Help!

Is an online MBA worth it?

iamisaid — Wed, 15 Aug 2012 10:33:47 -0800

I am thinking of pursuing an MBA in IT Management and have been accepted into an online program. But I've heard it said that if an MBA doesn't come from a top-25 or top-50 school, it may not even be worth having in the eyes of job recruiters and hiring managers. What's the real story? I am a working professional in a non-management support position at a tech company. I also have some limited experience as a manager in a non-IT field. I have a bachelors degree in journalism.

The program I'm considering is through Western Governor's University, an online school that seems to have a good reputation and accreditations that match traditional grad schools. I like the flexibility of online classes and the opportunity to accelerate through the program and potentially finish sooner than 2 years.

And the price is quite attractive, at about $3200 per 6-month period. On top of that, my company reimburses tuition up to about $5000 per year. At most, the degree would cost me around $2000 out-of-pocket.

But even so, will the degree be as valuable as I think it might be and is it worth the effort? Is it likely to help me advance in the tech world and get into management, particularly in light of the fact that it wouldn't come from a well-known institution?

Managing your boss

pakora1 — Sat, 30 Jun 2012 09:10:49 -0800

Managing your boss or her expectations I recently started a contract position. In the initial phone interview with the manager, I wasnt too impressed and felt that the interview didn't go well. To my surprise I was invited to meet the team and then selected for the job. I had conveyed my initial impressions about the manager to my recruiter. Fast forward to this week, my impressions were confirmed. Although not a complete loss, she does have a condescending attitude and tends to micro manage like crazy. Everything that I say is met with a rebuff. One theory that I have is that my qualifications are way over hers (our title and job duties are the same) and she is threatened a bit by me. I finally snapped at her and the next day she was a bit better. It could also be that she is looking for a replacement which is fine but I am just curious about some things here.

Some questions-

Why would someone hire you if the phone interview didn't go that well?
Why would someone be short/rude/condescending right from day one (I have had no spats with her, frankly not even enough interaction to do so)
How do you handle a boss who is almost your peer (same title, same background or less, who micro manages and is rude to you from day one)
How do I guage if this is just me or she is the same with others. I havent seen that behavior for others in her but the rest of the team is far away from where I sit.
I believe she has never managed anyone before, what do you think I should do in this case?
I could leave anytime as my qualifications are highly transferable but I love this work and want to complete the 6 months I am there.

Would love your thoughts and experience in such a case. Like I mentioned.

Thank you

Let's go do this life thing. Because I suck at titles.

Fen — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 15:12:22 -0800

Let's go do this life thing. Point the way and boot me up the nethers, mefites. Right then.

I want to shift out of my hometown in Derbyshire, move to London, get a job, and spend my time practicing martial arts and messing with computers and writing and discovering all the weird things that are out there in the world.

I also want to help my brother, who is 29, had kidney failure almost three years ago after ten years of immune system problems, and has been unemployed and essentially home-bound ever since. I want to be able to get a flat in an interesting place so he would have somewhere to get out of our parents' house, out of our hometown (he's never lived anywhere else) and get the opportunity to do new stuff. Yes, that's a vague plan.

Eventually I would like to travel for a year in Australia, although I don't want to shift out of the country without helping my brother first. (For those that know dialysis, he's on overnight peritoneal and is shifting to Hemo in a few weeks' time).

Job-wise, I have a year's experience in data entry/administration and two and a half years in bartending.

Volunteering-wise, I spent a year and a half as an Oxfam shop assistant, three months as a volunteer proof-reader and editor for an online amateur publishing company, two weeks as a publishing assistant for Random House publishing, and two weeks as a volunteer journalist for my local newspaper and the regional newspaper that owns them.

I have a 2:1 degree in English (and won a minor prize for my work) and volunteered as the university Scuba club's Membership Secretary and Treasurer. I graduated in 2008.

I'm 26, living with my parents, very annoyed at myself for this, have £10k in savings, no attachments to consider, no contacts to speak of in London (although I've been down there several times and I quite like the place), would prefer to live alone, and have no fricking idea what the best way would be to set this whole wheel rolling.

How would you set this whole wheel rolling, mefites? I think I would make a competent bar manager if I could find a trainee position, but I'm not fussed about any kind of work if I can find it. I have currently been applying for jobs through the net, but that hasn't borne much fruit and frankly I would bet all my aforementioned savings that it's not going to. I would move down and look for work after if I was sure that I could find a job and afford to live on it, but I keep hearing that's a Very Bad Plan from several careers-coaching people I've spoken to. If this isn't actually a bad plan, awesome! Let's go! If it is a bad plan, what would a good plan be instead?

Is it always tough at the top?

socksister — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 05:26:19 -0800

Does managing former peers make management harder or easier? 15 months ago I asked this question about whether or not to take a promotion. I took the job on secondment and found it to be enough of a challenge that I stayed. I'm still in that role and have found I'm pretty good at assigning and appraising work and recruiting new people, even managing thorny personal issues that occaisionally affected individual members' performance, but line managing former peers has been pretty stressful. Our team is mostly seen as exemplary in the work we do, and we seem pretty close-knit from the outside but it is taking a toll on me personally. I find the management position is often weird and alienating and I don't like feeling responsible for people I was formerly pretty close to (in a work context) - especially when having to manage problems. I've had great reports from my own manager and my team reports an improvement since I took over but I have no idea if the reason we hang together so well is because of our history rather than my management ability. I also feel a bit stifled - the secondment status means my areas of authority are really unclear and I'm not sure I like being away from the satisfaction and visibility of front line delivery.

However we're just in the final phase of the project that started my secondment so had planned to stick it out until July, when the role will be reviewed and either made permanent (in which case I would need to apply to remain in post) or eliminated. If the role was eliminated or if I applied and didn't get it (or didn't apply at all), I would go back to my former role/pay within the team. In truth this looks pretty appealing - there are new projects arising that I'm interested in and I'd probably be able to shape my former role to focus on those areas without being responsible for everyone else. I'd take less work home and stop angsting about stuff beyond my control (because that's what the manager is for!). The pay difference is less than £2k and I could absorb it.

So far so good but I've now been offered a more senior position at another place. I applied out of curiosity - I didn't think I'd actually get an offer and now I have to way up the pros of staying in a job I can step back from, or move on to something completely unknown but with greater management responsibilities. It looks like a great opportunity - the company is more prestigious, the pay is much higher and more in line with a management position and the benefits are great but I feel burnt out by the current post and am worried about going further down that line. There are definately areas of management that I enjoy but I don't know if it's for me in the long term.

I need to give New Company an answer this week. Can anyone lend any perspective?