The reverse-Goldilocks phenomenon

Jaltcoh — Fri, 25 May 2007 20:25:48 -0800

Why do people seem to prefer food that's very cold or very hot to food that's more of a medium temperature? You often hear: "Don't let your dinner [or coffee, etc.] get cold!" "Oh no, this beer [or soda, etc.] is warm!"

On the positive side, people love a "nice cold [beverage]" or a "piping hot [meal]," whereas you don't hear people exulting over a "nice lukewarm [anything]."

To be sure, there are exceptions. Cheese is good at room temperature, for instance. But for the most part, there seems to be a universally shared understanding that there's something special about foods and beverages that are either very hot or very cold, and that they shouldn't be allowed to drift into the middle zone.

Why? Is there any scientific basis for this?

Where's the spark?

Anonymous — Mon, 30 Jan 2006 14:50:33 -0800

I met a girl in December and have been seeing her for a couple of weeks. While I enjoy hanging out with her, it doesn't seem totally amazing like the beginning of some of my previous relationships. A few months ago I would have just ended this here but now I am not so sure. You see, after my last relationship (which ended fairly recently) I swore that in the next one I wouldn't let myself get obsessive immediately, spending all my time and thoughts when the next new person comes along. So... I haven't. But while I'm less anxious than I have been in the past, and am not letting my thoughts be totally consumed by her, there also seems to be a missing spark for me. I don't look forward to making plans with her like I might otherwise, and seem more interested in the prospect of other women than I would have at this stage of a relationship in the past.

Am I just becoming more mature? More jaded? Or is this just not the right relationship for me? Would I be cheating myself out of a chance for happiness by not continuing this relationship? Or am I cheating myself by continuing with it? Is it possible to let yourself fall for someone without totally losing yourself? Or by holding myself back do I doom myself to further lukewarm attachments?

What should I do?

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The reverse-Goldilocks phenomenon

Where's the spark?