An unusually good-looking male MA graduate classmate and I friended each other in RL + FB b/c we're in the same graduate class over the next year. We've worked on projects together, and have quite a bit in common. In the beginning - there was definitely attraction going on (esp for him). I felt he was very attracted to me b/c of my life experience, or that I don't pander to him like his younger female friends. He's also 22, I'm 38. In recent weeks, I've felt the age difference and his immaturity in certain issues show up, which I thought would be a good deterrent. The good news is I do not want to date him, nor do I see anything long-term if anything was to happen. But I'm struggling b/c I fear really hurting his feelings... yet I see him every week at school, so I don't know how to take him off? [more inside]
After splitting up with my Girlfriend of 8 years over a year and a half ago, I am ready to reenter the dating world. I'm glad that I took time off to work on myself. I instantly wanted to date after breaking up, but it was for all of the wrong reasons. I'm now ready and I need some guidance Details inside [more inside]
I'm finding myself in a very complicated love triangle between my partner and our mutual friend (his best friend of many years). My boyfriend and I are in an open sexual relationship, but I believe I'm emotionally cheating on him. I have no idea what to do, or where to even begin in trying to fix this. [more inside]
I have the urge to flirt online. I don't want to do this via any real social channels, because those are all real people and I don't want to hurt any of them. [more inside]
Deep in limerence, but the first attempt at sex was disappointing. [more inside]
I really need some advice on how to talk with my partner and address her questions about our sex life (or lack of it) as not only do we have a two-year old but my partner is also undergoing treatment for cancer. Help, please... [more inside]
I am living in a long distance relationship and have encountered an issue I do not know how to cope with. I hope you can help me. [more inside]
I am in my early 30s and have been in a loving relationship for over 8 years. We live together and our lives are very intermingled. But the passion is gone, and I am beginning to wonder whether we'd be better apart. [more inside]
I am a female and my boyfriend and I have been seeing each other about once a week for over a year. I am 27 and he is 30. I know he isn't seeing anybody else, and that he likes me. Why have we still not slept together? [more inside]
I've been dating a guy (30) for half a year, and though I am blinded by love, I'm starting to see signs that he could be narcissistic, but am not sure. [more inside]
My boyfriend cancels so often on our dates, and we haven't had sex even though we have been together for half a year, which makes me think he could have a sexual problem or is afraid of getting close to me. Details inside. [more inside]
I am currently involved in a sexual/dating/subculture where international meetings are normal. Most recently, men have met me in my city and then we have planned a trip later.... And I have had a fab time with these men- they have been great fun! I am okay with meeting men for dinner in Oslo, London or Stockholm..... I have no problem hopping on a plane and meeting a man, spending a few days with him and nipping back home... but I cannot figure out how to make sure that my flight home is paid for- if something doesn't work out. Is there any way to have your flights and hotel paid for, in a way that the host can not just cancel on you if you refuse to have sex with them?
How do I know if I am in love "enough" with my partner? Snowflakery to follow [more inside]
I have a wonderful relationship with my boyfriend. We are both mid-thirties; have discussed marriage and kids and are on the same page;we live together; and things are great. Except for one thing - I initiate sex most of the time and want it more. I know the next part is not right, but, me initiating things all of the time makes me feel bad. I know it is a stereotype to expect men to be wanting to have sex more. [more inside]
Occasionally, I bring up the subject of sex with my partner, and I always get nowhere. Sex has never been something that we've really talked about. We had those first few conversations when we met several years ago: disclosures of risks, general preferences, expectations for monogamy, etc. and from there we just let it develop naturally. We need to talk about it because our sex life isn't meeting my needs, and I've asked to talk about it, but I still don't know how to talk about it, and I'm afraid this is just going to become another in a string of failed attempts to talk about sex. [more inside]
However bizarre my inquisition, for those men and women who have 'been down,' and eaten the proverbial flower, what have your experiences been like? What does it taste like? Men taste like skin and smell a bit earthy.. and sometimes taste incredibly salty which is slightly unpleasant but not off-putting in the moment lol. So what do we taste like?
I'm a straight guy, late thirties. I have little sexual experience and have never been in a romantic relationship, for reasons of social anxiety and body image which I won't get into here. It's coming to seem possible that this will never change, and that thought is extremely painful to me. How can I learn to live with it? [more inside]
My fiancee and I have been together for seven-and-a-half years, owned a house together for three, and in the spring of this year she agreed to marry me. Last week she told me, quite out of the blue, that she wanted a break from our relationship. [more inside]
I’m going for a “One final attempt to straighten things out” about our sex life. Ineed a few lines to take and thought to hold on to so that I don’t come across as aggressive or needy or at least not slightly responsible... [more inside]
As someone with Asperger's Syndrome and that doesn't socialize much, I know virtually nothing about relationships and sex, and I never really believed that I would experience either of those. But I have finally met someone I connect with and we both want to have sex! [more inside]
Why am I not successful in love and lust? [more inside]
I want to be a healthy, fit person, and I want my partner to want that, too. What's the selling point? How can I convince my SO to make this change with me and notice how our generally very sedentary life is sucking the life out of our relationship? Help! [more inside]
I've slept with a lot of guys and only enjoyed it with like 10% of them. Are my standards too high, or too low, or what? [more inside]
I love him deeply, miss him terribly. He loves me more than anyone he's ever met. We go together like peas and carrots. But I broke up with him over one health problem that he can and would fix if I told him how much it bothered me. Am I nuts? [more inside]
I have a friend who insists on a certain way of understanding how men and women couple off. Basically, he sees the situation as rather animalistic, where all the women are essentially waiting to be asked out, and the first men to do so get the "choicest" women. The rest of the women are left for, well, the rest of the men. Obviously, this is pretty traditional/sexist/chauvinistic. Anyway, barring all that, he feels a constant urgency to get to women "before somebody else does," because "the best women will be taken." Of course, I understand asking someone out before someone else does, but his theory is off-putting to me. It seems like human personalities, reasoning, circumstances, geographies, and cultures throw a monkey-wrench into his theory. Things are a lot more complicated in my mind. Do you have an alternative way of seeing the dating world, have a different experience, or are there any studies that you could point me to on this subject?
Straight guy here, mid-30s. I'm a relationship virgin apart from two or three very brief and superficial ones, and would be an actual virgin if not for a handful of sexual encounters, almost all of them very unsatisfying. I've always fantasized about love and sex but whenever things get real my heart and body seem to lose all interest. What's wrong with me and are there other people out there in the same boat? [more inside]
Should I pursue a casual FWB relationship with this narcissistic but very intellectually interesting and sexy jerk?
Should I pursue a casual FWB relationship with this narcissistic but very intellectually interesting and sexy jerk? [more inside]
I've recently been through some major life changes and find myself feeling strong romantic feelings for an old friend, former co-worker. I fear acting on my feelings because I don't want to jeopardize our platonic friendship which, at my age (65) is precious. I worry that even talking about my change in feelings for this woman might ruin our friendship. I'm not certain that she has reciprocal feelings for me, although I think she might. We are very compatible in most regards, intellectually, shared interests and activities, etc. And the friendship just as it is is rare and cherished. Should I 'confess' and risk what we have, or accept it for what it is and look elsewhere for the intimacy I seek? As might be obvioius, I have limited experience in physical (sexual) and emotionally-close relationships.
On herpes and forgiveness. Nine months into our relationship, my boyfriend told me that he has HSV-2. That was almost a year ago. It still bothers me. What now? [more inside]
My wife of 14 years never tells me she loves me. She never initiates sex. She never holds my hand, kisses or casually touches me. No pillow talk. No thoughtful little gifts. I do all of these things for her as often as I can. [more inside]
I feel like a freak for wanting a long-term relationship. [more inside]
Do healthy, happy couples ever have periods where one or the other feels the ennui of "I love you, but I'm not in love with you?" If so, how do they resolve it? How do they decide if it's worth resolving?
My partner and I feel comfortable and safe in our relationship, and we feel love for one another. But we are sexually unfulfilled, and to a smaller extent emotionally and/or intellectually troubled. How do we know whether to break up or to work at it? [more inside]
Is it bad if I don't feel an intense/passionate kind of love in my relationship? [more inside]
I want to have sex without love but I can't love sex without it. [more inside]
How do you get over the shock and pain of discovering you've been sleeping with someone who hasn't been in love with you for months? [more inside]
Is it possible to get over some pretty big sexual chemistry if you really frigin love someone? [more inside]
Should I marry the girl I like having sex with, or the one I like the rest of the time? [more inside]
How can I become a better lover? [more inside]
What to do when in love with two people? (Sex talk so possibly NSFW) [more inside]
Coping advice for a dating trauma? Soothing words before I can see my therapist? Do I go through a job interview tomorrow? [more inside]
I met a girl from a club and we had sex. She had a boyfriend then (she cheated on him with me). She is now single & we have been incredibly close. I think I'm being clingy and I need help BIGTIME because I really like her. [more inside]
Savage Inequalities? Menopause and Erotic Intimacy. I have skimmed many AskMes and haven't seen quite this combination. Dan Savage is often touted and cited, but this combination is not well covered. What do Mefites and others do when their sex life is on indefinite hold due to their female partner's menopause? What if polyamory is off the table? [more inside]
Can you help me regroup after a disastrous OK Cupid experience or two? [more inside]
How to deal with no-go work infatuation [more inside]
Help me get my gay groove back, or find it in the first place! [more inside]
She told me she was raped. Why? [more inside]
Stuck in an impossible dating dilemma: overhaul my entire self, or never have a relationship with a man?
Stuck in an impossible dating dilemma: overhaul my entire self, or never have a relationship with a man? [more inside]
Struggling writer asks: Help me write a non-cringeworthy love scene! What are some of your favourite literary love scenes, and what made them great? [more inside]
So I'm a late-twenties bi woman, and I'm still a virgin who's never had a boyfriend or girlfriend (I prefer guys). I'm glad I waited this long, though - even when I was 18, my Asperger's had me feeling somewhat younger socially and emotionally, and I was nowhere near ready to date or do anything. But now I've reached the point where I'm ready to start meeting some nice prospects, looking for a relationship and, yes, having sex. (NSFW) [more inside]