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daveg02 (2)

How can I be less needy?

My about 15-year marriage is in severe difficulty. A big part of this is me being too needy. My wife and I knew I was needy before we got married, but both thought that getting married would fix it. It hasn't. I'm taking an antidepressant, and we are in therapy and both committed to staying together. I've read some other answers on AskMi, and am following up with some book recommendations, but I feel like I need more help. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2014 - 29 answers

What creative meetups can I go to in Amsterdam (or surrounding area)?

I'm a designer having trouble (a) getting work, (b) networking, (c) finding a peer group that I can hang out with. I live near Amsterdam. What meetups / conferences / places can I go to that will solve as many of these issues as possible?
posted by gonzo_ID on Feb 26, 2014 - 7 answers

Paranoid about people being disingenious

How do I overcome this fear/paranoia? [more inside]
posted by morning_television on Jan 27, 2014 - 16 answers

Single, nearly 35, feeling profoundly alone and terrified.

I'm having a real bad night and pretty bad month or so. I'm trying to stay optimistic but it's so, so hard. Any kind words and support will help. [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Jan 24, 2014 - 37 answers

Help me close the door on this infatuation..

I act like an idiot around this person. I need to stop and salvage my dignity. [more inside]
posted by MeaninglessMisfortune on Dec 4, 2013 - 14 answers

How to manage an LDR when there's no end to the distance in sight?

I have just moved to a new city for my dream job and I can’t stop crying. Long distance relationship woes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 4, 2013 - 7 answers

I feel like I've woken up with no friends - what can I do to get by?

I'm a 22 year old male. In the past month I've moved to a new area, lost my best friend and gone through a breakup. My friendship had been so broad and close that I neglected my other social connections. I'm also new in my job and haven't made any real connections there. Ultimately it feels like, in the span of a few weeks, I've lost all of my social outlets. I feel desperately lonely and unsure about what the hell I can do. I'd appreciate any advice on how to get through life day-by-day as I piece myself together. [more inside]
posted by Henners91 on Sep 3, 2013 - 19 answers

I don't know how to say no to coffee dates with strangers - media job

I have a job in radio and an on-air persona that invites interaction from our audience. Nice for the station, not so great for me. I have to be polite but firm in cutting people off, but I suck at it. Help? [more inside]
posted by cartoonella on Jul 1, 2013 - 13 answers

Dating and OKCupid as a childfree loner

I'm childfree, meaning I don't have kids and don't want them. I'm also on the far end of the loner scale. I have some questions about finding a partner and using OKCupid to do it. [more inside]
posted by moonlit walk on the sun on May 19, 2013 - 49 answers

Dealing with pangs of loneliness

I really miss the affection, romantic interest and even just the regular physical touch of another human being. I'm going through several life transitions and can't really start a relationship until at least the fall, but how do I tide over the desperate feelings of loneliness until then? I don't want casual sex or a pet. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2013 - 17 answers

Help me help my partner help his father

My father-in-law lives alone, has a poor diet and a heart complaint, is a hoarder, is lonely and socially isolated, and it makes my partner miserable worrying about him. How can I help my partner, help my FIL, and help my partner help my FIL? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 20, 2013 - 10 answers

Advice on dealing with feelings of loneliness and paranoia

I'm having a hard time dealing with feelings of profound loneliness and paranoia about the states of friendships which in turn affect my dreams and my moods (being a vivid dreamer) and I don't like the affect it has on my happiness. Is there any good literature or advice that you can give to help me conquer these feelings and appreciate what I have in my friends or branch out to finding others? Any communication advice to being clear with friends and alleviating my paranoia without insulting them or sounding weird? [more inside]
posted by Recca on Jan 22, 2013 - 6 answers

How To Use this Big Change/Trip in My Life To Practise Social Skills/Build More Intimate Relationships?

I'm a 20 year old girl who has had little experience with real romantic relationships. I also have trouble with friendships---though I am super extroverted and can mix and mingle in parties with ease, creating sustainable friendships is very difficult for me. I'll be going on exchange in France for 5-6 months in January. I'd like to practise and build intimate friendships and romantic relationships (short-term, but meaningful!) when I'm there, and try to get a handle on WHY I usually have trouble. How can I do this? More deets inside. [more inside]
posted by rhythm_queen on Oct 22, 2012 - 18 answers

Everything fell apart, again. Now what?

I'll try to make this not too long-winded, but basically I find myself at square one for like the hundredth time in the past 6 years, and I'm just flat out of resilience. Help me form a plan for getting through the impending long dark winter. [more inside]
posted by like_a_friend on Oct 16, 2012 - 25 answers

Am I depressed?

Am I depressed? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 10, 2012 - 15 answers

Decade-long dry streak.

This is a very difficult and embarrassing question to write. So please be kind. But essentially, I have been (involuntarily) celibate for many many years and it’s driving me CRAZY. How can I stop this decade-long dry streak? And if I can’t, how can I learn to make peace with it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 24, 2012 - 42 answers

Is there a good substitute for family connection?

How can I help my grandma feel less lonely? She has dementia and alzheimers, but it still pretty together most of the time. She should be surrounded by family, but isn't- we are all so spread apart. . . [more inside]
posted by abirdinthehand on Aug 25, 2012 - 13 answers

Everyone is leaving me! How I do deal with everyone else moving away and moving on while I'm stuck here?

Everyone is leaving me! How I do deal with everyone else moving away and moving on while I'm stuck here? [more inside]
posted by gumtree on Aug 19, 2012 - 12 answers

How to create structure in an unstructured day?

What are the most successful strategies for managing unstructured time? [more inside]
posted by davisnot on Jul 9, 2012 - 11 answers

How to stop being passive in romantic/social life?

I'm in a funk through completely failing to take my romantic/social live into my own hands. How do I fix this? [more inside]
posted by neilb449 on Jun 16, 2012 - 11 answers

Scientist with an imaginary friend

Who was this lonely woman scientist with an imaginary friend? [more inside]
posted by Dixon Ticonderoga on May 30, 2012 - 6 answers

How does an (almost) full time single parent cope with loss, change, and loneliness?

How does a single parent cope with an already limited social life and general stress with the added crap of breaking up (again!)? [more inside]
posted by retrofitted on Apr 16, 2012 - 10 answers

How to deal with dog attachment issues?

My dog is about 7 years old, she is a Australian mini. Whenever I go away after work for more then a few hours she cries, mopes and whines. She has this annoying habit of whistling through her nose. I live with my family and commute to work with my Dad & to school, so most days we're leaving at 8am and back 6pm--she does fine then but then if I'm gone & my Dad is home is when she is really fussy. I typically spend the weekend with my Fiancé, which really bugs her (I can't take her with us as my Fiancé lives in a Resident Hall). If I go out of town, or away for the night she is still really needy and fussy. How can I get her to be less annoying for my family, to be less fussy about me being gone? I take her for walks and love on her when I am home but that's not enough. Any suggestions or ideas would be most helpful.
posted by snow_mac on Apr 15, 2012 - 6 answers

Lonely extrovert seeks MMO.

I'm a lonely extrovert looking to take the edge off the loneliness by playing an MMO. Which one should I play? [more inside]
posted by Pericardium on Mar 29, 2012 - 11 answers

Social Hacks for NYC Needed

My partner recently moved to NYC from the Northwest. Help me help him (geeky, science-loving, and politically active) find friends that aren't already mine! [more inside]
posted by corb on Feb 21, 2012 - 22 answers

I know it's the right thing to do. Why don't they?

How do I handle the reaction of my family and (people I thought of as) close friends to the news of my divorce? Lots of special snowflakes ahead. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2011 - 27 answers

where the party at? oh nowhere.

Extroverts: What do you do when you have to be alone for a long time? Or you have to make a decision and there's no one to call and talk it through with you? [more inside]
posted by sweetkid on Dec 13, 2011 - 20 answers

please hope me not turn into scrooge ...

How do you deal with profound loneliness during the holiday season? [more inside]
posted by phoenix_rising on Dec 10, 2011 - 22 answers

Forever Alone?

When it comes to interpersonal relationships, I’m having a difficult time managing. I only have 3-4 good friends, and I haven’t had a girlfriend since before GW Bush was re-elected in 2004. Lately it even seems like the few friendships I have are suffering. I cant figure out how to move forward from this point in my life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 3, 2011 - 11 answers

Hope me ride out the holidays

Ideas for a single person to go somewhere over Christmas break. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 28, 2011 - 7 answers

Dog seeks rats

Is it an insane idea to get my pet dog a pet rat? [more inside]
posted by whalebreath on Sep 16, 2011 - 36 answers

.

How do I go about making friends? I know the theory I just never manage it in reality... [more inside]
posted by twine42 on Jul 18, 2011 - 14 answers

Lonely and depressed

Recently single, depressed, and lonely. Need things to fill my nights and weekends where I can meet people and potentially find a community. [more inside]
posted by lacedcoffee on Jun 22, 2011 - 40 answers

I need a hand this summer

I broke my left hand (I am right handed), what are some things that can make my recovery more successful, entertaining, and easier? [more inside]
posted by Jsn7821 on Jun 10, 2011 - 10 answers

Remember we're all in this alone

What can I do right now, to reduce my loneliness? [more inside]
posted by b33j on May 20, 2011 - 51 answers

Avoiding the sads while traveling alone in Asia

Single female traveling solo for nine days in Kuala Lumpur and Bali. Please reassure me that I'm not going to be sad and lonely and freaked out the entire time. [more inside]
posted by ladybird on May 19, 2011 - 16 answers

Efficient or lazy?

I wait until, I think a task needs to be done ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY or NO MORE DELAY possible to do anything. [more inside]
posted by daveg02 on Apr 27, 2011 - 23 answers

Specific Ideas for Meeting Like-Minded People in Los Angeles?

I am feeling a little lonely, and want to get involved in some local activities, but I don't know where to start. I'm looking for specific suggestions and recommendations. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2011 - 16 answers

Brain freeze, dont know why, hopelessly dissapointing

Help me with this brain feeze? No one visits me, I have no friend or I can get along with anyone socially great first few times. So I decided to let everything go. I cant ask help to anyone in person so this post. I do have a good job, good credit, somewhat healthy, good education {May be I never learned :) } Couple of days in a week I think as follows... I am living a life, lifestyle thats truly less than the true potential. Selling myselves less so called "plucking the low lying apple" Not stretching my comfort zone. Some people have said that may be I get depressed. The problem is I dont always try to change it. Instead I just think about all the chances I screwed up and all the people, relationships I have pissed off. Its like my brain freezes to come up with solution and want to just watch TV and eat pizza(comes later though). For few days I live a very lethargic , lazy life. Dishes lie unwashed, no laundry, no bath, no gym, exercise. I live alone, so need to be ashamed of someone might say something. I am 31 years old, live alone, never been in a relationship, no gf(as I piss off everyone in some way I cant understand). I do have a good job, good credit, somewhat healthy, good education {May be I never learned :) } Help me with this brain feeze?
posted by daveg02 on Feb 9, 2011 - 9 answers

He's Just Not That Into Me

He's just not that into me. The problem is he's my husband. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 21, 2011 - 53 answers

How do I know when I'm ready to try again?

How do you know when you should start dating again? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 18, 2011 - 22 answers

Do you believe in life after (first) love?

My first boyfriend/first love and I recently broke up after nearly four years together. I know this was the right decision, but I feel like I'll never feel this way about anyone else ever again. I realize that sounds dramatic, silly, and naive, but I'd really like to hear from the perspective of someone who's been through it that, yes, life does go on (and maybe get better, in a different way) after a first love. [more inside]
posted by gypsyhymns on Jan 4, 2011 - 24 answers

I'm 35 years old. I'm funny, smart, beautiful. I make good money and have a lot of friends. But I've never been in love, nor has anyone told me they loved me. Forever Alone?

I'm 35 years old. I'm funny, smart, beautiful. I make good money and have a lot of friends. But I've never been in love, nor has anyone told me they loved me. Forever Alone? [more inside]
posted by boostershot on Dec 30, 2010 - 93 answers

Is this empty-nest role reversal normal? How can I stop it!??

I have weird feelings of guilt/empty-nest role reversal?? My parents are relatively young (dad is 54, mom is 57), and I just moved out a few months ago 500 miles away, and I am scared to death that something is going to happen to them and I won't be there to save them. Is this psychological torture completely crazy? [more inside]
posted by LemonGardot on Dec 30, 2010 - 16 answers

My friends keep telling me to "just get laid" but it feels gross - what should I do?

Should I suck it up and get into a relationship with/sleep with someone I'm not really attracted to, to gain some relationship momentum (ie break the streak) and get over someone I can't have? [more inside]
posted by vilolagrl on Dec 28, 2010 - 53 answers

Could we maybe just kiss a little and then forget this ever happened?

Given that I know my defence mechanisms are still operating on high after leaving an emotionally abusive relationship, and I keep getting cold feet with anyone who tries to get close to me, and yet still crave small doses of intimacy, how can I ethically conduct myself with people who are/could be interested in me? [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Dec 21, 2010 - 6 answers

Separated for a while, divorce on the way, and I'm lonely - but unsure about dating

When I was 23, I got married. It was really great for six years, and then for a year and a bit, really pretty horrible. We worked hard at it, but it didn't. Now I'm 30 and we've been separated for 3 months. Definitely feels right that it's over, and in time we'll divorce. It feels too soon to start dating - problem is, I'm lonely and really missing sex. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 23, 2010 - 15 answers

I'm speechless

Logistics of a license-less carless introvert ending a 20 year marriage: I don't know where to start with my preparation. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 22, 2010 - 17 answers

Loneliness/Depression/Unmotivated (college, on my own)

How do you break out of a depressed/unmotivated/lonely funk? (see: in college and on your own for more details..) [more inside]
posted by isoman2kx on Nov 19, 2010 - 10 answers

Mini Christmas?

How to have a smaller-than-average Christmas? [more inside]
posted by ellieBOA on Nov 11, 2010 - 13 answers

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