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Is it depression if I'm legit sad?

My life overall is good. I want for very little in the way of material things, I have friends and lovers who are wonderful, I have fulfilling hobbies, I do meaningful volunteer and professional work, I live in my favorite place on earth, and I generally try to enjoy life to the fullest extent possible. But I also have a relationship that is secretly falling apart, body image issues directly related to the relationship problems, trouble finding enough work to be comfortably financially independent, parents on the other side of the country who are suffering in ways I cant do anything to help with, and a few other things going on that are legitimately upsetting. So when I have bouts of crushing sadness and feelings of hopelessness, I'm not surprised. But the bouts have been lasting longer and coming more frequently, and things feel more and more hopeless (not to the point of wanting to self-harm, but to the point of feeling like my only options are resign myself to this forever or leave everything I know and love and start over alone). Recently a friend asked me if I was depressed, and I had to stop and wonder. Could I be? Can depression co-exist with legitimate sources of sadness and despair? Should I consider seeking treatment for depression as well as figuring out how to resolve all this other crap?
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2014 - 21 answers

 

How do I work out what to do next, without disrespecting my marriage.

Out of nowhere it seems, I’m considering asking my wife for a divorce and I can’t figure out if its because I met someone else I feel I’d really like to get to know or because I’ve realized that we just aren’t meant to be. Or am I just being a douche for even considering throwing away what I’m confident almost anyone would agree is a marriage to a great woman? Sorry for the long story… My wife is a great person – of course – why would you marry someone you didn’t think this about? The list is huge – she’s smart, funny, empathetic, gets me, is very beautiful and will one day I know make a really wonderful mother. I know most would say all of this about their spouse, but even with rational eyes, the above is true. She has bad points too for sure, but no need to list those off as well. We’ve only been married about 18 months, but together for some time before this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 17, 2014 - 58 answers

Depressed & need inspiration.

I am a single mother, down in the dumps and looking for mefites for a lightbulb or maybe just a bone. I've been juggling my post-divorce financial mess, toxic workplace, toxic people all around, and I'm so tired and exhausted, I just know my six-year old and I need to be somewhere where the atmosphere is more laid back with better quality of life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 9, 2014 - 13 answers

Calling all Freelance/Paycheck couples...(wall o text, sorry!)

How do you budget? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 4, 2014 - 8 answers

Quarter Life Crisis + Indecision Paralysis: How to deal & move forward?

I'm a 26 year old female "Commitment Phobe" seeking advice on 1) How to feel ok making a temporary/final decision about what to do with my life and 2) When to scrap, adjust, or follow through on my decisions when the going gets tough? Messy details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 16, 2014 - 12 answers

How to continue when you feel you're falling behind every day?

I'm in my mid 30s and feel like life has passed me by and it's too late to fix it. Looking for help on handling the situation so it doesn't consume me. Lot's inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 5, 2013 - 20 answers

Career advice/resources for autistic adults: go!

Recently I have had to come to terms with the fact that 1) I am somewhere on the autistic spectrum and 2) I am working in a field that is not ever going to be very accommodating for me. Advice and pointers needed; secret spices, more info and toy inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2013 - 14 answers

How do I move past regret for a potentially overzealous princpled act?

I just gave up an awesome internship offer for my principles. Yay! Except I am feeling an overwhelming sense of regret. How do I move past this, stop feeling sorry for myself and remember why I did it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 26, 2013 - 16 answers

How can I live a better life?

After years of depression and self-medication I'm trying to live a better life. What should I be doing? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 25, 2013 - 15 answers

Is there any better/cheaper health insurance I can get?

I am fed up/freaked out about the cost of my health insurance... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 6, 2013 - 10 answers

Major life decisions ahead…

My wife and I are at a crossroads, in a good way. We have a few very interesting opportunities, and each carries its own pros and cons. Please help us consider our options. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 19, 2013 - 10 answers

My life is a mess, and I feel paralyzed to fix it. Suggestions?

My life is a mess right now, and I can't seem to start taking the steps I need to take to dig myself out of the hole I'm in. Any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 12, 2013 - 17 answers

Is this company expense policy whacked out, or is it just me?

Corporate has just handed down a large change to our T&E policy that involves us submitting original unredacted copies of credit card bills and/or applying for a company credit card that we need to pay ourselves. This seems really out of line but I don't know how to respond. Slight snowfall to follow... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 24, 2013 - 24 answers

How can I inspire my partner to be a healthy, fit person with me?

I want to be a healthy, fit person, and I want my partner to want that, too. What's the selling point? How can I convince my SO to make this change with me and notice how our generally very sedentary life is sucking the life out of our relationship? Help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 16, 2013 - 31 answers

What is like being a lawyer, but not?

I am a senior transactional associate at a big regional law firm in a secondary market. I am probably not going to make partner at my firm, I am really sick of caring about typos, and I'm burned out. What can I do with my life? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2013 - 13 answers

Are you My Life/ Career Coach?

I need to change my life and career in several different ways, and I feel quasi-paralyzed because a) the changes I need to make are so large and b) special snowflake. Suggestions for approaching this rather ungainly undertaking? Also, I am 35. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 4, 2013 - 5 answers

Family vs. Career

Is it more important to be near family or to follow career developments? Snowflakey existential question that needs review. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 18, 2012 - 15 answers

Can I quit my job?

Should I quit my job? Much more inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 4, 2012 - 18 answers

Get Busy Livin

I'm pretty sure it's not a mid-life crisis. Help me rationalize/forget about my burning desire to quit my job and change my life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 3, 2012 - 31 answers

Life like Walden

After many years of living a very social life in a very big city I find myself living alone in a very remote part of the world. Seeking advice and insight into a life of solitude. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 31, 2012 - 15 answers

Is she calling off the wedding?

The other night, I met my Fiancee and we went out on a date. She is a wonderful person and I am madly in love with her. We've been together for less then a year but we're already planning a wedding next year. She wants to study abroad in out of the country the last semester of school (Spring). When I expressed concern that we wouldn't be as close when she got back as we are now, she said that If I'm concerned about that, we should NOT be getting married. What do you think? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 13, 2012 - 38 answers

Help me get over my decade-long addiction to the Internet.

I've been addicted to the Internet for a decade now and every aspect of my life has been affected. Help me rejoin society, get past this, learn time management skills, develop a work ethic, and piece my life back together. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 13, 2012 - 18 answers

Losing limerence.

How do you get over ten years of limerence? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 29, 2012 - 20 answers

Help me get out of this steel cage

I don't have ambition. How do I get it? Any stories to share? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 6, 2012 - 12 answers

How can I break this thought pattern?

I haven't been able to use certain items or do certain things until I feel my life has "started." How can I break this thought pattern? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 31, 2012 - 54 answers

What should I do with my life?

What should I do with my life, MetaFilter? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 6, 2012 - 17 answers

I feel trapped in my very own Bell Jar

I have no friends, no life, and am trapped in a dysfunctional family. Help me. Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 10, 2012 - 26 answers

I’m torn between what I do and what I always thought I would do

I’m in my late 20s and still wrapped up in self-indulgent “what should I do with my life” questions that I can’t seem to resolve. Sorry for a rambling question - please help. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 9, 2011 - 22 answers

How to have a baby and a life?

Pregnant and Scared: How to have a baby and a life? Advice desperately needed: Were you somehow able to fulfill your dreams (travel, career, etc.) with a baby, especially if you were middle class (or lower) economically? If so, how did you do it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 18, 2011 - 65 answers

Should I complete this masters program?

LifePlansFilter: I’m currently enrolled in graduate school in a masters of secondary education in art program. I enrolled as a way to explore my creativity in studio classes, and also as something to do during unusual life circumstances. Being in this program will continue to be an option for me for a limited time. Should I take the requisite courses I need to complete the program or should I keep taking whatever classes I want and drop out of the program when I leave? Many details within. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 16, 2011 - 5 answers

Please help me find a purpose in life.

Please help me find a purpose in life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 16, 2011 - 15 answers

My life just tapped me on the shoulder and told me it's time to grow up. Questions about switching a job after years of doing it and maybe being pigeonholed in it inside!

My life just tapped me on the shoulder and told me it's time to grow up. Questions about switching a job after years of doing it and maybe being pigeonholed in it inside! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 20, 2011 - 30 answers

How do I go about deciding whether I want kids or not?

How do I go about deciding whether I want kids or not? I'm 38 going on 39. I'm female and I'm single. I live in NYC. And I have no idea if I want to have children. How do I go about truly understanding what I want? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 25, 2011 - 46 answers

How can I make life better for my boyfriend?

My boyfriend's hit a string of horrible luck. What can I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 19, 2011 - 11 answers

This is just more than I know how to deal with on my own.

My girlfriend is pregnant. We're keeping it. Now what? (Advice and encouragement requested.) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 14, 2011 - 44 answers

What can make this situation better? Details inside.

What can make this situation better? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 23, 2011 - 6 answers

Won't You Share in My Weltschmerz?

I used to write, draw, make funny things that I put out into the world to share with anyone who was interested. I liked forming connections with people, enjoying shared interests and talking about ideas. I liked creating online communities and seeing total strangers develop meaningful connections with each other. Now I just want to hide in my hovel and watch old Buffy episodes while the world burns. How can I regain my desire to engage with humanity? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 3, 2011 - 25 answers

How do I get the good old days back?

I’m looking for some advice or different points of view to help me decide what direction to move in. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 12, 2011 - 4 answers

What are little things I can do each day to lower the amount in which I care what people think of me?

What are little things I can do each day to lower the amount in which I care what people think of me? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 25, 2011 - 25 answers

Self destruct in 3-2-1...

I am struggling so terribly has anyone coped with something similar and managed to right it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 25, 2011 - 43 answers

I'm living a life of loneliness and despair. Can I prevent it from becoming permanent?

I'm living a life of loneliness and despair. Can I prevent it from becoming permanent? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 7, 2011 - 34 answers

Help me talk to my wife about what time I leave work?

How can I communicate better with my wife about what time I leave work? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 5, 2011 - 86 answers

Life in Sheffield?

What's life like in Sheffield, UK? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 26, 2010 - 9 answers

Career/life advice for a real world neophyte, please.

I'm a recent college grad who has been playing the "unemployment blues" for the past 5 months and have had no real success finding full-time work. However, I've recently had two excellent interviews for an entry-level administrative assistant position at a small non-profit organization in New York (where I currently live with my parents). I'm not sure if this is the kind of work I would be able to do for more than a year (well aware that most people don't necessarily enjoy their jobs and generally have to haul ass in the early stages), and the pay is mediocre, but I am entering student loan repayment soon ($80k+ worth of debt) and need a steady paying job ASAP. Please offer me some perspective from your experiences in this situation, and help me determine if I am making the right decision. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 24, 2010 - 27 answers

Want to start school and get our life on track, but how?

Want to start school and get our life on track, but how? I've made some mistakes in college by not showing up an entire semester so my GPA is 1.05, even the lower university's here in TN like austin peay won't take me because my grades suck. I live a hour away from the two community colleges in my area. I also have to figure out how I'm going to give my family a place to live, I lost my job in missouri and moved down to TN with my mom. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 26, 2010 - 37 answers

Life stinks, I'd like to change it.

I should probably talk to a therapist, but what can I do ON MY OWN regarding general distaste for my life complicated by apathetic depression? Wall of text inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 20, 2010 - 19 answers

I am a nonentity. It is very distressing.

I am a nonentity. It is very distressing. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 28, 2010 - 22 answers

Life advice for the newly agnostic.

After doing pretty poorly at a four year university and having been kicked out for leaving their religion, how should I go about judging community colleges to attend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 21, 2010 - 19 answers

Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now?

I think I want to move but don't know how, nor if it's wise to do so right now. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 7, 2010 - 5 answers

How can I find balance in my life with newfound social success?

I need some help finding balance. I've gone through a number of changes in my life lately, and it's been amazing. But the changes have caused my work life to suffer, and I've just taken on a new job, so this is not a good time. Anxiety, exercise, confidence, and a loss of balance all come into play here... I need some help putting it all together. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 30, 2010 - 10 answers

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