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What Am I Good For? Hopefully Absolutely Something

So I did an aptitude test way back when, and the results were thus: *is good at short-term transactions, interactions, is creative and possesses superior verbal skills.*. [more inside]
posted by watercarrier on Apr 16, 2014 - 18 answers

 

Life check-in worksheets?

I have recently undergone a lot of change in my life - ended a long-term relationship, moved into a new place (previously lived with partner), quit a long-ish-term career (9 years including profession-specific study) and as a combination of the above, changing a lot of my social group. I think this is a sort of make-or-break crossroads time in my life - so would like to actively work on and question what I want to get out of my career/personal relationships. My therapist suggested doing "life check-ins" where I spend time thinking and writing down these things. Does anyone know of any "worksheets" that might give me some guidance to work with? Even a check-list would be helpful, but I'm envisioning maybe a list of questions. Google has brought up some options but I'm looking also for personal anecdata about what has worked for mefites. Thanks!
posted by nvly on Apr 13, 2014 - 6 answers

1.85% on 45k student loan - just pay the minimum?

So, I'm selling my house and will have some extra cash, finally. I have a consolidated student loan that after years of steady payments, has come down to a very low 1.85% interest rate. Given the current economic conditions, and an intense desire to have my money work hard for me after years of being in the doldrums, should I up the payment and try to save a tiny bit on interest? Or would it be better to stuff my IRA, or put money into a no-load fund or index? [more inside]
posted by ihavequestions on Apr 11, 2014 - 13 answers

Who would i hire to research a personal life? Literally.

So I'm trying to figure out who I would hire - theoretically - to do an index or census of a personal life. I want someone who would be able to look at a life (with consent) to study it. The person would follow a subject around to determine core friends/family/contacts on a daily basis and then do research based on relationships. Then they'd objectively drill down into some key data points. - How many of the people in my life up to one relationship away (aka my brother's good friends) are married or single and for how long - How many of my past relationships are single/married and for how long Beyond that maybe some polling on specific questions about the subject from those people. So who am I looking for here? Is it a Private Investigator? A sociologist? A statistician? A life coach? Is there someone in an "I Heart Huckabees" way that you hire to do this sort of thing? Is this already a job or service someone provides and I don't know the name?
posted by rileyray3000 on Apr 7, 2014 - 5 answers

Switching MA programs

I'm finishing my second semester of a MA program, and am realizing that I am not happy in this program and (most importantly) it isn't fulfilling my academic and professional needs. I have identified another MA program which I know would be a good fit for me, and am considering switching. Assuming money is no object here, would I be crazy to make the switch? [more inside]
posted by schroedingersgirl on Mar 31, 2014 - 7 answers

Is it depression if I'm legit sad?

My life overall is good. I want for very little in the way of material things, I have friends and lovers who are wonderful, I have fulfilling hobbies, I do meaningful volunteer and professional work, I live in my favorite place on earth, and I generally try to enjoy life to the fullest extent possible. But I also have a relationship that is secretly falling apart, body image issues directly related to the relationship problems, trouble finding enough work to be comfortably financially independent, parents on the other side of the country who are suffering in ways I cant do anything to help with, and a few other things going on that are legitimately upsetting. So when I have bouts of crushing sadness and feelings of hopelessness, I'm not surprised. But the bouts have been lasting longer and coming more frequently, and things feel more and more hopeless (not to the point of wanting to self-harm, but to the point of feeling like my only options are resign myself to this forever or leave everything I know and love and start over alone). Recently a friend asked me if I was depressed, and I had to stop and wonder. Could I be? Can depression co-exist with legitimate sources of sadness and despair? Should I consider seeking treatment for depression as well as figuring out how to resolve all this other crap?
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2014 - 21 answers

How do I get to know my parents as people?

After seeing and reading about the death of parents, one of the biggest regrets seems to be not knowing them better. I have a cordial but distance relationship from my parents and while I don't ever see us being BFFs, I would like to know them better as people and their life. How do I do this, considering I live 6 states away? [more inside]
posted by lpcxa0 on Mar 26, 2014 - 21 answers

Nuts and dried fruit mixed?

Can nuts and dried fruit be mixed in a container with no decrease in quality or shelf life? [more inside]
posted by BillyAnne on Mar 8, 2014 - 7 answers

An Inspiring Mantra to Start My Morning?

Do you have a poem, quotation, or mantra you read each morning that puts things in perspective, and inspires you? I'm looking for one to help with motivation when waking up each morning. So far no luck. [more inside]
posted by ratherbethedevil on Mar 4, 2014 - 20 answers

I have a $33,000 dream. Plus or minus 10K.

I'd like to buy a home in a very cheap place that still has culture--local, regional, and national music. Museums, public attractions, parks. Bike friendly and/or walkable and/or good public transportation system. Great natural attractions nearby--hiking, rafting, kayaking, swimming, climbing, caving, hunting, fishing. Where is this possible? [more inside]
posted by jsturgill on Mar 4, 2014 - 44 answers

How to deal with difficult co-workers?

In December I started working for a mill that manufactures flour, and although most employees there are excellent and fun to work with, I am discovering that many of my immediate co-workers appear to sabotage others for their own benefit. [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend on Mar 1, 2014 - 9 answers

Losing faith in idealism

I’ve realized that I’m starting to lose faith in idealism, perpetuated in part by instances where reality hasn't lived up to it, so I'm beginning to become more "realistic" about where the limits are. However, I’m worried that this leads to mediocrity. Has anyone dealt with this? [more inside]
posted by markbao on Feb 27, 2014 - 30 answers

How do I work out what to do next, without disrespecting my marriage.

Out of nowhere it seems, I’m considering asking my wife for a divorce and I can’t figure out if its because I met someone else I feel I’d really like to get to know or because I’ve realized that we just aren’t meant to be. Or am I just being a douche for even considering throwing away what I’m confident almost anyone would agree is a marriage to a great woman? Sorry for the long story… My wife is a great person – of course – why would you marry someone you didn’t think this about? The list is huge – she’s smart, funny, empathetic, gets me, is very beautiful and will one day I know make a really wonderful mother. I know most would say all of this about their spouse, but even with rational eyes, the above is true. She has bad points too for sure, but no need to list those off as well. We’ve only been married about 18 months, but together for some time before this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 17, 2014 - 58 answers

Connecting And Building A Mentor Relationship

I am currently in my late twenties finishing my degree in Information Technology. I live in a large city. I'm a sociable person. My question is, not working in the professional environment, how could I find a professional mentor? How do you recommend someone build such a relationship? Any ideas? .... There are industry related conferences within the area which I sometimes attend. Professors seem like an option. But what steps should I take to form such a relationship? Is it something you would ask for explicitly?.... I'd just like to thank the community in advance for your feedback. It's been something I'd like to do, but due to uncertainty in how to go about it I haven't. Thanks!
posted by Nicholas Geary on Feb 12, 2014 - 8 answers

Depressed & need inspiration.

I am a single mother, down in the dumps and looking for mefites for a lightbulb or maybe just a bone. I've been juggling my post-divorce financial mess, toxic workplace, toxic people all around, and I'm so tired and exhausted, I just know my six-year old and I need to be somewhere where the atmosphere is more laid back with better quality of life. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 9, 2014 - 13 answers

Calling all Freelance/Paycheck couples...(wall o text, sorry!)

How do you budget? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 4, 2014 - 8 answers

Help me, help myself?

How to approach therapy when I'm not really sure what I'm going for but feel depression has a huge part of it. Kicker - the standard tests show I'm not and I don't know how far to push to get some help or what I even need help for. [more inside]
posted by lpcxa0 on Jan 29, 2014 - 9 answers

LivingFilter: Western Town, Outdoorsy Girl

After living the nomadic life for many years, I'm starting to think about settling down again. Search criteria inside. [more inside]
posted by grinagog on Jan 29, 2014 - 24 answers

How to cope with a difficult and unhappy job?

All week I have been feeling lost, unhappy, disappointed, confused, and trapped. [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend on Jan 19, 2014 - 30 answers

Quarter Life Crisis + Indecision Paralysis: How to deal & move forward?

I'm a 26 year old female "Commitment Phobe" seeking advice on 1) How to feel ok making a temporary/final decision about what to do with my life and 2) When to scrap, adjust, or follow through on my decisions when the going gets tough? Messy details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 16, 2014 - 12 answers

I wish life wouldn't get in the way of my lifelong learning

How do you balance "life" (ie. full-time work, family, chores etc) with hobbies/projects that can't be done in short time periods or occasional bursts of action, but require a longer sustained activity? [more inside]
posted by gakiko on Jan 12, 2014 - 11 answers

Advice for living with/loving a first year high school teacher.

My girlfriend, domestic partner and hopefully future spouse is a first year English teacher at a public high school in NYC. This is a tough job which takes a huge emotional and physical toll on her. She looks to me for support and sometimes I have a hard time knowing how to provide it to the point of feeling powerless to help her. Has anybody here been on either side of this? Any advice? [more inside]
posted by West of House on Jan 10, 2014 - 29 answers

Not a New Years resolution but a New Life resolution, ideas needed.

I am in a period where I want to change my life by introducing small steps that I can build upon. This covers my diet, my home, my free time and my relationships. I'd love to get peoples suggestions of changes I can add to my list and how best to go about it. [more inside]
posted by Ranting Prophet of DOOM! on Jan 10, 2014 - 11 answers

101 guide to NYC laundry service

I've been dropping off my laundry for the past several years now, but really only know about the drop and fold. My work wardrobe is more business attire these days (male), but can't seem to figure out the terms and services usually available. This may sound a little silly, but I run into language barriers and unclear signs in every laundromat in a 10 block radius. So whats usually available besides the classic wash & fold (and dry cleaning)? -I have button down shirts, what does pressed mean? -Whats the correct term for wash and iron? Sometimes they look puzzled. (sometimes they don't have this service) -If you have your shirts done itemized, the $1.75 each option, what are they doing? -How do most men get there work shirts laundered at these places? Thanks, and note: these laundromat persons around me are all pleasant, and hard workers, but I just can't figure out whats what.
posted by shimmer on Dec 27, 2013 - 10 answers

Give a kind bit of advice to a young lady adrift in the sea of life.

My brain is swirling with options and I just need kind advice. I have no shoulder on which I may settle my weight for a moment's rest. I beg your listening ear!Should I sit tight and save or make a move to take pressure off my vehicle? It needs to last me a few years.... How can I escape the white trash wastes I have been condemned to? [more inside]
posted by Driven on Dec 26, 2013 - 34 answers

Help me figure out my life... goals? wants? needs?

This has been a year of change (breakup, move, deaths, grad school). I'm home at my parents' for the holidays and want to take some time to reflect on what I want for the next year and the rest of my life. I feel like I'm entering a new phase of life, and want to do it with self-knowledge and a vision of what I want it to be. This includes career, love, friendships, travel, everything. I'm hoping you can recommend exercises, readings, and approaches to figuring out what I truly want and (to a lesser extent) how to get there. [more inside]
posted by c'mon sea legs on Dec 21, 2013 - 18 answers

I'm stuck and not sure how to do life.

I am lost on how to proceed with my life/diet. Because #1 - There are many positives to eating strict #2 - There are many negatives to eating strict. [more inside]
posted by learninguntilidie on Dec 17, 2013 - 20 answers

How did getting a dog change your life?

I have no pets and will be becoming a first time dog owner shortly. I'm interested in learning everything I can to prepare. I've read and learned most of the basics, but would love to hear more. How did going from not having a dog to having a dog change your life? I want to hear it all- what inconvenient, weird, wonderful, mundane, happy, unhappy, and most of all unexpected ways did adding a dog to your family change your life?
posted by long haired child on Dec 16, 2013 - 45 answers

How do I know if a job is a good fit for me?

Earlier this week I started working at a flour mill driving tractor trailers, after 2 months of training at a truck driving school to obtain a CDL, and I am having doubts about this decision. [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend on Dec 14, 2013 - 28 answers

Finally meeting in real life; the disappointment will be palpable

There are several people I've been chatting to online for various periods of time, who I'm likely to meet on my next journey around the USA. In the case of a few, they are asking to meet up. Nothing romantic and more than friendship with any, though the level of friendship differs; in some cases it's quite strong or complex. Problem is, the prospect of finally meeting IRL repeatedly terrifies me to the point of making me feel ill. Is this kind of feeling normal or common, or not? How can I subdue it and not make myself hide, literally? [more inside]
posted by Wordshore on Dec 11, 2013 - 23 answers

How to be content again and pick myself up once more

During my studies I've dragged myself into some sort of downward spiral: falling behind multiple times but still managing to pick myself up, only to find myself struggling even more. I've now arrived at a point where I feel completely broken and depressed. I need to find a way to start off again without feeling overwhelmed by everything else that still needs to, or can be done. I seems the only way to regain control is if I could be as carefree as I was as a freshman. [more inside]
posted by csdfa on Dec 10, 2013 - 5 answers

How to continue when you feel you're falling behind every day?

I'm in my mid 30s and feel like life has passed me by and it's too late to fix it. Looking for help on handling the situation so it doesn't consume me. Lot's inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 5, 2013 - 20 answers

Career advice/resources for autistic adults: go!

Recently I have had to come to terms with the fact that 1) I am somewhere on the autistic spectrum and 2) I am working in a field that is not ever going to be very accommodating for me. Advice and pointers needed; secret spices, more info and toy inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2013 - 14 answers

I'd actually like a little LESS variety in life, thank you very much.

I need some direction toward living a life with more depth and less breadth, less quantity and more quality. Any tips, recommendations or resources you know of would be most appreciated. [more inside]
posted by Jess the Mess on Dec 2, 2013 - 26 answers

Help me find the right job knowing my strenghts

I co-own and manage a financial services company and I stopped liking my job about 2 years ago. I'm growing increasingly frustrated because I have to spend my time doing things I don't like, and the job (actually thew industry) has changed so much over the years. My problem is to find an alternative. I read many books about finding my path and did many tests, and the usual result is that I love inventing things, fixing things/problems and helping people. [more inside]
posted by caudingo on Nov 27, 2013 - 13 answers

Oh the fun you'll have!

Magical video of festive people speaking lines in rhyme about life and fun? [more inside]
posted by Mike Mongo on Nov 25, 2013 - 2 answers

Naked Lunch

Philosophical persectives on slaughtering animals for food required. Help me work through unexpected questioning? [more inside]
posted by Caskeum on Nov 19, 2013 - 23 answers

What have you been wrong about, realized it, and it changed your life?

What have you been wrong about, realized it, and it changed your life? I remember reading Albert Ellis' wonderful self-help book A Guide to Rational Living where he gives a great list of irrational and self-defeating beliefs that people have. Among these beliefs was the importance people placed on other's opinion of them as well the emphasis people placed on being perfectionistic in their own lives. Much of this underlies Cognitive Behavioral Therapy but the effect is even more prevalent than that. We all have had beliefs that have held us back, and I'm curious as to what things you once believed that were holding you back in your personal or professional life. Anything will do. It can be anything from knowing the importance of making good first impressions to the need for keeping oneself physically fit even when one doesn't want to. I'm looking to see whether I share of any of these traits or not. So what are the beliefs that have held you back or others that you know?
posted by RapcityinBlue on Nov 19, 2013 - 60 answers

A one way flight to anywhere? (What should I do with my life?)

I'm recently back from a long trip through South America, but my travel lust is hardly satiated. I have some savings left, and I'm desperate to take off again. Is this a good idea? And if so, where should I go next? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by lightgray on Nov 13, 2013 - 5 answers

Help I'm Lost

My peers all have careers, spouses, houses, families ... while I'm single and thinking of moving to Germany as that's the only way I'll be able to afford a second Bachelors. (I want to study something STEM related to break out of this job rut I'm in). I can't help but think of it as an incredibly lonely endeavour - to study a new language and then attempt to go to Uni all over again with people more than a decade younger than I, in a country where I know no one at all ... and to top it off, I was never very good at making friends and I am not close to my family members at all. Are my misgivings valid or should I grit my teeth and just go ahead? I feel stuck, I can't move forwards but I can't stay where I am either. I don't know what to do. [more inside]
posted by Cat Set Go on Nov 8, 2013 - 4 answers

Another midlife crisis?

I lean to the insane side of life when it comes to always trying to change. I have tried three times now to change from an enterprise programmer to SOMETHING! ANYTHING else... Here I am trying again... bound for failure? [more inside]
posted by mrgroweler on Nov 3, 2013 - 2 answers

How to cope with a major life change?

As someone with Asperger's Syndrome (and a few anxiety disorders), I find change, especially sudden change, difficult to cope with, but I could have a chance at a fantastic job if I am able to move across country in the next week. [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend on Oct 30, 2013 - 10 answers

How does a 20 yr old healthyish student get back in shape without dying?

The fact I never liked the "traditional" forms of exercise never bothered me before. That is, until it recently dawned on me activities like going to the gym or running might be the only options I have left. But, with sensitive knees and shins from growing quickly and the residual effects of childhood asthma still occasionally inhibiting my ability to do cardio, these activities seem more foreign than ever. What can I do? [more inside]
posted by intelligentfool on Oct 27, 2013 - 26 answers

Inbetween Days

What tasks should I accomplish during a week off in between jobs to improve the state of my soul? [more inside]
posted by thenewbrunette on Oct 26, 2013 - 13 answers

What is the best advice you would give re: rediscovering yourself/life

Or, more suitably... your best advice to someone trying to learn more about themselves (become stronger, learn what I want/need/wont settle for) to prepare for dating in the distant future. [more inside]
posted by BrandNewMe on Oct 21, 2013 - 13 answers

How is life in San Francisco different from life in New York City?

I'm a late 20's native New Yorker - grew up in Brooklyn and lived in Manhattan and Brooklyn for most of my life. I've lived in San Diego for the past year. Lovely place, but it's not for me. Got a job offer in San Francisco and I'm excited and ready to make the move. I've always loved my visits to San Francisco and its walkability, culture, food, shopping, and diversity have always made it comparable to New York in my mind. I love New York, but I don't want to move to San Francisco expecting it will be just like living in New York. I've already noticed some big differences that I embrace (and some I dislike.) People who have lived in both cities (especially as a young person): what are some of the differences you found between life in New York and life in San Francisco? Thanks!
posted by blackcatcuriouser on Oct 8, 2013 - 16 answers

To Whom Can I Promote a Forum on Life Extension?

I am producing a forum that deal with Life Extension issues. Presentation will run the gamut from Ray Kurzweil to tissue and organ growth to the ethical and moral issues now being face by the medical and scientific communities as they continue with moving forward with their research and applications. I have contacted futurist, sci-fi and life extension groups here in Los Angeles. What other options do I have beside rejuvenation clinics. I have thought of local universities. To which department do I direct event information
posted by goalyeehah on Oct 7, 2013 - 7 answers

How do I move past regret for a potentially overzealous princpled act?

I just gave up an awesome internship offer for my principles. Yay! Except I am feeling an overwhelming sense of regret. How do I move past this, stop feeling sorry for myself and remember why I did it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 26, 2013 - 16 answers

Not sure how to tell my dad I want to join the army.

My dad paid for 200k worth of schooling for me, i got a BA in Economics from a good school, went on to do some independent film production, quit my job with my boss 6 months ago, finally saw the last film I helped produce premiere at TIFF, and I've been re-evaluating what I want to do with my life. (Currently 24.5 years old.) I want to join the Army and become a Ranger, like my uncle (who my dad despises) but I don't know how to go about telling my dad. [more inside]
posted by sawyerrrr on Sep 18, 2013 - 48 answers

What can you learn from a bad breakup?

I was recently left by my partner of 4 years.... after I'd made significant life decisions based on the commitments he made to me. Now I feel like I've learned all these cynical life lessons. What should I take away from this? [special snowflake details inside] [more inside]
posted by thelastpolarbear on Sep 12, 2013 - 22 answers

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