I am feeling such anxiety about an in law family incident about a month ago. I am a conflict avoider. I don't think fast on my feet. But on the other hand, I am trying to stand up for myself more, because I have noticed how much it affects my health to hold my anger/resentment inside. It literally makes me sick to my stomach and tense all over. I wrote about the incident and how I feel my sister and brother in law are very inconsiderate about other people's time and money. I understand this is not my problem except when it affects me. My question is, what am I supposed to do now? I am not sorry for standing up for myself. But this family does not discuss problems, they give silent treatments for 10 years. It makes me so so so uncomfortable and I feel anxiety just anticipating the next family event. I don't want to feel like I am getting the silent treatment. However, I cannot avoid these people for the rest of my life.
My partner and I have been together a long time and I have posted about issues with his sister before. I can see that his inability to draw boundaries is the real issue here and so my question is combination of how does one deal when a SO can't and won't draw boundaries and has a needy sibling who has a hard time backing off. We are all in our late 30s but emotionally in our relationship, it feels like he needs to take care of her, and be there for her and I can't get over the feeling that her very existence is now sucking oxygen out of my relationship, and i need to stop feeling like that. Details inside. [more inside]
This is my first time posting so I hope it's worded correctly. My husband is Hispanic and I am not. He is the oldest boy and his family and is extremely loyal to his siblings. Sounds great, but it isn't for me. My husband's brother and his wife take as vantage of my mother-in-law by dumping their kids at her house all the time. OK, this isn't technically my problem but it affects me in a lot of ways .... Like when she has an appointment and needs to drop them off at my house Etc. [more inside]
I work with (and perform IT functions for) a small direct mail house in the heart of New England. My supervisor has tasked me with keeping up on new and changed laws and regulations regarding data security in the states that we operate in (MA, ME, NH, VT) as well as federally. Is it too much to hope that there's a website that specializes in this? [more inside]
I am driving from Toronto to Philadelphia later this week for my brothers wedding. I have an opened bottle whiskey that I'd like to bring in the trunk of the car-- it's a bottle of great emotional significance and a family tradition. I know that in the US the open bottle is fine as long as it's in the trunk, but what about Ontario? also, where can I see these laws online?
My family just moved to Tippecanoe County in Indiana, and we're baffled by the seemingly arbitrary rules that dictate when babies are and are not allowed in bars and restaurants. [more inside]
I want to sort of lease my car (that I'm still making payments on) to someone in a different state. Am I crazy? [more inside]
I want to buy this hemp seed for my friend in Finland. I do not want to and am not willing to break any laws. If I obtain it, is it legal to take to Finland personally? Is it legal to send it in the mail? What laws are relevant? As far as I understand it's super low THC and is legal in many places. Thanks
I have two brothers-in-law, my husband's younger siblings. Both of them are getting married. The older of the two, who we'll call Brother A, has been planning his wedding for a while. His fiancé and he have been dating for a few years and are planning a traditional wedding for next year in August. The younger, Brother B, is getting married ASAP to a girlfriend he has only been dating briefly, for well... the classic reason for getting married in a hurry. They also want to get married in August, of this year. Brother A says that's "his" month. Is that even a thing? [more inside]
Ok, so...long story short, I am really having a hard time making rent for reasons outside of my control. It's due in a week, and despite exhausting every venue I can think of I can't come up with that money. [more inside]
I've built a website that combines all state constitutions in one place. I want to build another website that puts all state laws in one place. But state laws change much more often than state constitutions. And although states make their laws available online (usually in the form of revised statutes), their word count greatly exceeds the total word count of state constitution. It took six months to build the state constitutions website. [more inside]
For reasons that were mutually beneficial at face value, I sold my car to my SO's parent. However, therein lies the problem.. any way to get myself in a better situation than the one I've inadvertently gotten myself into without realizing the full ramifications of my decision? [more inside]
For instance, I know that in some states it is legal to park on the "wrong" side of the street (i.e., the subjective left side), and in some states it is illegal. Other laws that differ from state to state include smoking laws, gun laws, phone recording laws, etc. How would I go about determining what laws are actually in effect in a given place (in this country), without resorting to something as unofficial and possibly unreliable as Wikipedia or question-and-answer websites?
Please help me understand if what I am seeing with toys and video games is price fixing and if all price fixing is illegal. (Specific instances inside) [more inside]
I'm moving from Berkeley, CA to Houston, TX next week, I'm wondering if there are any significant differences in the legal regime I should be aware of. [more inside]
My employer requires me to travel to a meeting 20 miles away once a week. They do not pay gas or mileage for this and as of today, are refusing to compensate for travel time as well. Is this legal? [more inside]
In British Columbia - my mother has a tenant that regularly withholds rent for non-essential repairs (shower heads, faucets) and then charges us exuberant amounts of money for service. My mother asked me to speak with her and I did. The tenant wants to take us to court now and I want to be prepared. How do I do this? [more inside]
What are the laws and or regulations about "possession" of employee/company email after an employee is terminated? [more inside]
We recently moved to a new house and our washing machine hook-up does not drain properly. Instead of fixing it, our landlord keeps being pushy about how we should just drain it into the state land behind the house. [more inside]
When a builder builds a new home way too tall and City Hall lets them get away with it, what happens next? [more inside]
How much will this traffic violation cost me? [more inside]
In certain US states political candidates at the local and state level have to spend all of the funding they get for a certain campaign before the November election. In others, they get to keep that pool of cash for future elections. This is what I've heard anyway. But I can't find any kind of definitive list of which state has which law. Does such a list exist in an easily accessible place? How do I find out more about individual state's campaign finance laws without wading through endless Secretary of State documents? And as an aside--does this come up often? Do campaigns ever really bother to hold onto money if they are ahead or do they usually spend the dollars on the current campaign anyway?
Let's say I have a stack of parking tickets in NYC in the 1990's and early 2000's. What are the chances they're going to come up if I get a license in NYS again? [more inside]
I'm curious. Are there illegal, but acceptable, practices in your neck of the woods? [more inside]
My boyfriend's relatives just moved out of a house in Illinois which belongs to his grandmother (who lives in a different state). She wants us to move in and take care of the house. There is someone living in the guest house who we want to leave. [more inside]
Car got towed in San Francisco, what are my odds of getting the charges dismissed? [more inside]
Soccer/Football refereeing question: When watching soccer games on television I often see an immense amount of clear fouls happening in the box when there are corner kicks being taken. Why don't referees blow these fouls more often?
Somehow I've inherited a very tall (around 5 feet), very heavy hookah that was brought over from the middle east (UAE). I don't want it but don't know what to do with it. It's been in an attic for the past 20+ years so it hasn't been used in a very long time. It could be worth a lot or a little, I just don't know. Are there any concerns I should have if I try to sell it? Paraphernalia laws that could get me in trouble? As far as I know it is meant for tobacco but could possibly be used for other stuff.
What legal barriers would there be to requiring that every pack of cigarettes come with a nicotine patch? Would this even be good policy? [more inside]
I'm trying to have a party with a giant bounce house, and there's a big parking lot right next to my house. From a legal standpoint, what are the steps I would need to do to make this happen? Will I get immediately shut down by the police even if I get permission from the lot owners? [more inside]
Legality/advisability of turning a reality show season into a musical? [more inside]
To what extent can a company accommodate a disabled person? Ontario, Canada specifically. [more inside]
Doubts about getting married after 15 years together. Please help. If you were with a woman for 15 years, you live together and were engaged but really wasn't sure if you wanted to marry her or get married at all for that matter would you feel differently about the whole relationship if the following things occurred: [more inside]
Is it legal for a bar to serve a cocktail fortified with vitamins in Washington state? [more inside]
Should my father in law be telling me what to do in regards to buying a house with my wife? [more inside]
During the USA world cup match yesterday a French player knocked the ball out of Hope Solo's hand when Hope was looking for a player up field to send the ball to. I saw a similar play in a different match where a player was yellow carded for doing this. What do the laws actually say about a player doing that to a GK?
I recently found myself in the midst of some bike politics in NYC, and one of the adjunct arguments of the anti-bike crew goes something like "people on bikes are assholes who never follow laws." What's the relationship between cyclists and road laws in countries that aren't the US (or bike-ly-unusual parts of the US)? [more inside]
To import food from the US to Europe, where do I start? [more inside]
Is my wife going to get arrested as a meth maker? Anything I can do to stop it? [more inside]
I was refused alcohol on my 21st birthday at my local liquor store. How is this legal? [more inside]
What is the technical term for people working to meet a target, not the thing the target is trying to measure? [more inside]
Legalfilter! My work was taken advantage of - I interned/trained for a small business but wasn't paid for any time. I asked for things to be made right, but was told to shove it. Do I go to court? [more inside]
How do religious folk who practice food storage as part of preparedness beliefs and customs deal with actual instances of widespread food shortages? [more inside]
Jobhack/automation filter: Please help me track legislation and its proposed changes to the U.S. Code. [more inside]
In the state of California, what is the minimum number of hours a non-exempt, hourly employee must work before taking his/her thirty minute meal break? [more inside]
What prevents companies from simply screwing everyone and paying off their owners debt free? [more inside]
My girlfriend drives a 2004 Ford Focus that is insured by her mother, but my gf pays her for it. The title and registration are also in her mothers name, but the loan is in my girlfriend's name with her mom as a cosigner. My girlfriend has made 100% of the loan payments (as well as minor repairs). Recently my girlfriends mom has begun to demand that she turn over the vehicle because it is "hers", but has now decided to try to cancel her insurance but cannot do so due to not having the plates to the car. My girlfriend is now living in fear and worrying that her mother is going to come over to our house and take the plates off the car. Her mother has also threatened to report the car as STOLEN. [more inside]
My husband was arrested for paraphernalia possession but we got the charges dropped. Does he still have a record/does he re-qualify as a first offender? This is in NC and an extended explanation is inside. [more inside]
Question: I'm from the UK temporarily working and living in a university city in Ontario, Canada for the 2009/2010 academic year. Due to the fact that I work from home a lot and have to transfer large files (via Skype/DropBox/FTP) from Canada to my labmates overseas, my landlady's internet usage has gone up since I've become a tenant. I think she's using Rogers Express or Extreme Plan. If I'm understanding things correctly, according to the Ontario Landlord/Tenant Act, Canadian landlords can't increase a rent until 12 months after a tenancy has started. What do I do? [more inside]