Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with late

Someplace to read, write, work alone at night in NYC

laptolain — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 13:29:54 -0800

Someplace to read, write, relax alone at night in NYC. I'm looking for somewhere to go where I can unwind alone. I live in Maspeth, Queens where it's mostly residential and after 8PM almost everything is closed. Any place in Queens, Manhattan or Brooklyn would be fine, I don't mind long train rides.

The perfect establishment is very dark inside but all the tables have sufficient lighting for reading/writing. There might be music playing or some kind of live band but it's not a club or frat hang out. I like all kinds of jazz so that would be a bonus. The train station should be a reasonable distance since it's getting pretty cold now. It's open till 3AM or later, never very busy and at no point will I be expected to get up and leave for new customers. I don't want to sit at the bar.

Beer, liquor, coffee and food are all fine but none of them are priority over the atmosphere. As cheap as possible is probably second to atmosphere. I'm looking for a place that's the opposite of where people go to get seen.

I found a few older, similar posts but they seemed focused on Manhattan.

Thanks :)

How do I make it right - years of unpaid taxes

simplesharps — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 18:30:58 -0800

I haven't paid taxes since Feb 2007, how do I make it right? I'm Australian. Despite good intentions, I never got around to paying my taxes this year... or the year before... since Feb 2007 when I went out on my own as a web designer. I've travelled a fair bit and haven't made a great deal, but this has always been in the back of my mind. I need to make it right - start afresh. I'm Australian - What do I need to do?

I've scanned, OCR'd and imported all of my banking statements into an online money manager, which tells me what I've spent and how much I've earned. Then I calculated how much I would have had to pay (not including tax write-offs & if I paid on time) to give me a rough idea. This doesn't take into account late fees of course. Which I'm freaking out about.

I assume my next step is to take all of these figures to an accountant? Will they need anything else? Am I better off putting this off until I have significant reserves in my bank account? How harsh are the late fees going to be? How much should an accountant charge to submit these?

Thanks for your time - I appreciate it :)

Forgot to file tax returns. Now what?

doomtop — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 09:27:00 -0800

Forgot to file tax returns. Now what? I filed extensions back in April to get an extra six months to file. (I have to file in two states and one federal return.)

I guess I expected to receive something back, but never did. I got lazy and here I am, a little more than six months later and I haven't filed.

I did do the taxes and get an estimate on what I owed and sent that payment to avoid interest, etc. But there were some forms and things I needed at the time which is why I filed for extensions.

What's going to happen now? Should I just send them in late and hope for the best? Or is there something specific I should be doing?

I haven't heard anything from the IRS about it...

Exorcising the Late Demon?

Anonymous — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 21:01:56 -0800

How did you overcome a lifetime of chronic lateness? [THE SHORT VERSION: Always late, bad at estimating time. You too? Fixed it? How??? ]

[THE LONG VERSION:]

I'm one of those people who's always late to everything. Everything. Sorry.

I've been this way as long as I can remember -- especially once I got my driver's license and was responsible for my own transportation.

I'm not (especially) disorganized, I don't get a power-high from keeping people waiting, I really do respect people's time. I have suffered personal and career consequences, as well as the internal guilt and shame I feel every time I arrive, flustered and apologetic, to a room full of frustrated faces. But I'm still late to everything. Everything.

I've tried for years and years to come up with "systems" to overcome this--all sorts of alarm clocks, beeping things, reminders, phone calls from friends, cutesy "put a dollar in a jar every time I'm late" kind of stuff--but nothing seems to work for more than a few days. I *am* capable of self-discipline but I think this issue has a different origin.

Another MeFi thread confirms the root cause of my lateness: I have a very poor internal clock. I cannot estimate how long things will take or have taken. I always think I can squeeze in one more task before I walk out the door. If I look at my watch and see there are 10 minutes before I have to leave, my brain keeps flashing "no problem, you still have 10 minutes" for the next 20--then I'm shocked when I realize the time disappeared. I am an intelligent person but cannot get over the assumption that putting on my shoes, finding my keys, locking up the house, walking to the car, putting on my seatbelt, and starting the car will all occur instantaneously and do not count towards travel time. On the rare occasion that I--through a monumental effort--manage to leave early, I am so proud of myself that I look at my watch, see all of that luxurious extra time, and say "excellent, I have plenty of time to stop for coffee on the way." And of course you know what happens next.

45 minutes ago I sat down at my computer and said to myself "I'll just take 2 minutes to write up this AskMe question before going to bed." How did I not anticipate this? It happens every time.

Even self-awareness and knowing/anticipating my own tendencies doesn't seem to help. If my instinct tells me a task will take 1 hour, I know enough to distrust that instinct and leave myself 3 hours instead. Then the task ends up taking 5.

Those of you who are NOT chronically late: I'm sure this makes no sense to you, comes off as excuse-making. I acknowledge that everything I have written is absolutely stupid. After all, the answer is simple: just leave earlier.

Unfortunately it's been decades and no amount of reasoning or concentrated effort have cured me -- I'm starting to feel that "just leave earlier" is like "just read in a straight line" to a dyslexic person.

But those of you who "get" everything I've written here: has anyone conquered It? How? Tell me everything. Details, philosophy, systems, self-flaggelation, self-help books, joining the army,therapy, whatever worked for you could work for me. This has beaten me my whole life but it hurts people and makes me look like/feel like a jerk. I'm going to conquer it in this lifetime even if it takes until I'm 90. Better late than never?

[Full-disclosure: I was diagnosed with ADD as an adult and am on medication for this. The medication helps in many ways but my time-issues have not changed at all.]

[I do oversleep but that's only a small portion of my overall lateness-habit. I appreciate alarm-clock-tricks but that's not what I'm looking for here]

Thank you

There such a things as "Administrative Assistants' Day"? Sorry, never had a secretary before: what should I give as a late gift?

Anonymous — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 11:20:46 -0800

Oh no! I forgot "Administrative Assistants' Day" - what should I do / get my secretary to make it up to her? Any gift ideas? I've never had an administrative assistant / secretary and never knew there was such a thing as "admin assistants' day". I, like everyone else in my office (though I'm the youngest / newest), forgot or never knew about the day, but our secretaries knew about it and they are not happy -- actually, mostly they're charming and dismissive of the whole thing, but I do feel like doing or getting something ASAP.

My secretary (who I share with 3 others) would normally be getting flowers because that my usual option when I screw up. I have a friend who makes crazy good truffles, another standard ... scary that I have "standard" solutions to my screw ups, probably means I screw up too often ... oy.

But what should I get her? What should I do to make it up?

I haven't been here long and my secretary was transferred to me about 4 weeks ago, so I don't know too much about her tastes. Here's my best go at what might matter for a gift - She is:
*In her 30's,
*Fashionable (though I know next to nothing about fashion)
*Works in a cubicle in the hallway
*Married
*Can be serious, but is usually funny/sarcastic

Thanks a million for your help and ideas - if you want to ask questions, you can email me at
"ididntremembersecretaryday@yahoo.com"

Late Christmas Cards

sandpine — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 08:26:04 -0800

How late is too late to send out Christmas cards? We've had a horribly busy Christmas season (wife in grad school, multiple family illnesses) and have not sent any Christmas cards as we usually do.

I say it's too late to send cards, spouse says we must...

What thinks the MetaMind ?

SandPine

I AM THE VINDOW VASHER

xorry — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 02:10:23 -0800

Quick! What is the joke about the vindow vasher? My friends and I are going nuts! ..and looking up salmon PR)N.

Low calorie snacks?

isoman2kx — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 20:03:07 -0800

Low calorie snacks? I need some low calorie foods you can eat the hell out of at 2/3 AM. So far I've come up with shredded lettuce packages where you have like 15 calories for every 2 cups of lettuce and even if you ate the whole package, it's like 150 calories tops.

I can't seem to stop late night eating . I can control myself during the day, but this 4-5 year late night eating habit is killing me. The only thing I won't eat is anything spinach, cabbage, celery stick related. I need something half-edible.

-Travis

Deli Delivery in Los Angeles

arha — Tue, 27 May 2008 06:03:22 -0800

I'm looking for a good deli that delivers in Los Angeles, Beachwood Canyon to be precise. I need a website or very patient people. My boyfriend is getting home from an overseas trip on Thursday, which happens to be his birthday. I'd like to organise a hamper of tasty foodstuffs to be delivered to him, as I know he hates shopping and is certain to have absolutely nothing in the fridge.

Complicating factors are that I am in another country (Australia) so I have to be able to order it over the web, or be able to talk to them on the phone and have them be very patient with me. Also, he is picky. It has to be fairly healthy but also gourmet.

Any LA mefites have suggestions for where I can get something delivered to him? The only LA deli I am familiar with is Greenblatt's on Sunset, which seems to deliver but I can't find a website for them.

Can you recommend a website that will help me file my late tax returns?

Anonymous — Sun, 16 Dec 2007 09:46:51 -0800

Tsk, tsk. I still need to file my taxes from 2006. Is there any website you can recommend that will help me do this?

My girlfriend, she's sleepy.

kbanas — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 07:44:14 -0800

How can I help my girlfriend wake up on time? My girlfriend has to be to work by 8. I have to be to work by 9.

Every morning, the same demented scenario plays itself out, and I am now to the point where I would like to consider alternate scenarios which might improve the situation for everyone involved. For this, I look to you, the hive mind.

So, for the purpose of providing you with clarity about this situation, I will break down a typical morning experience and highlight the area of concern.

The night before, as we get into bed, my girlfriend will set the alarm for 6:50 the next morning, so that, in concept, she can be out the door by 7:30 and to work by 8. She also sleeps next to the alarm, while I am on the other side of the bed, against the wall.

This is where the farce begins.

By her own admission, she has never, ever, in all the time we have spent together, gotten up at 6:50. Instead, she hits the snooze button. And hits it. And hits it. And hits it. So that every 9 minutes I am jarred awake by the shrill cry of the alarm clock.

When does she actually get up? It depends. I would estimate that approximately 50% of the time, she gets out of bed at around 7:30. The rest of the time, she manages to get up around 8. Obviously, punctuality isn't really a big motivating factor for a number of reasons - she doesn't really care for her job, no one really takes note of when people arrive, etc, etc..

My big thing is, I don't have to be to work until 9, so I try to sleep until 8. The key word here is try. Instead, starting at 6:50, I wake up to the alarm, and continue to wake up every 9 minutes thereafter until she gets out of bed. If she gets up at 8, which is the same time that I try to get up every morning, this is a good hour and ten minutes of regularly interrupted sleep, and it leaves me grumpy and irritable in the morning - not to mention that we are then trying to get up and out of the door at the same time, with only a single bathroom/shower/etc.

I've tried using my brief moments of consciousness as I wake up in irritation to try to urge her out of the bed. This does not work. I've tried suggesting that she set the alarm to a time that more reasonably resembles when she might actually get up, but she doesn't like that idea because then she has no "snooze time" - she actually has to get up when the alarm goes off, instead of being able to just snooze it for a half hour or hour or so.

I mean, I dig it. The bed is warm and the house is cold and the bed is comfortable and the cold house is not and it's nice to snooze and get some extra sleep, but I don't understand why the alarm doesn't bother her as much as it bothers me - she says she doesn't even really ever know it's going off - that she snoozes it while in some sort of trance state, but it drives me crazy!

What are some strategies we might discuss for optimizing our morning?

I mean, maybe it's as simple as it's her house - her morning routine - and I need to just suck it up, but I think there has to be a better way!

How can I accept the tardiness of those around me?

SpiffyRob — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 12:14:20 -0800

How can I accept the tardiness of those around me? Briefish background: After years of freelancing and general work-for-myselfitude, I've taken a position at a genuine office with cubicles and everything. I've been here about two months, I'm settling in nicely, and I'm enjoying the stability of a *cough* real job.

The problem: (Mostly) everyone here is very passionate about the work they do, and I would never question their commitment, but there's a MASSIVE culture of tardiness in the air. One weekly meeting, which always takes place at the same place, at the same time, has never started any earlier than seven minutes after its scheduled beginning. A few weeks ago, I was actually shooed from a room when I showed up a minute early.

The catch: Although I am in a middle-management position, and could influence some, the problem extends all the way to those on top. Moreover, despite my personal belief that persistent tardiness reflects a lack of commitment, the company is, unarguably, extremely successful. For whatever reason, tardiness works, and everyone else has drank the Kool-Aid.

And so: Help me swallow this Kool-Aid! I'm not at all an uptight person, I'm simply coming from an environment (of my own creation, admittedly) where promptness was extremely important, and now that it isn't anymore, I'm having trouble adjusting. Is there anything I can do beyond rolling my clock back seven minutes?

How do I apply for an ideal job whose application deadline has just passed?

Chorus — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 02:36:39 -0800

How do I apply for an ideal job whose application deadline has *just* passed? After a horrific week at work, I spent Friday afternoon jobhunting online and came across the IDEAL job for me at the local courthouse. Great pay, great location, couldn't ask for a more fitting opening to find to the point it's so suiting, it's rather freaky.

The only problem? The closing date for applications was at 4pm yesterday. The exact time I found the job description? 3:58.

I called the courthouse - but the department I needed had gone home for the weekend already [can you see another reason why I'd want this job?]. Plus the job will only take postal applications. I really, really want to apply and am totally kicking myself I hadn't discovered the opening earlier.

Should I:
1. Forget about it.
2. Drop an application in the post ASAP
3. Do #2 PLUS mention I realize the deadline had passed in the cover letter
4. Try calling again on Monday to see if they will accept a late application, ONLY THEN mail one in?

Denied boarding for an ariline, best recommendations/experiences to get compensation?

skepticallypleased — Mon, 27 Nov 2006 16:07:12 -0800

(Denied boarding Airline question) -- I just got back from what was supposed to be a cheap trip to Paris (rtrp $464 after tax) but on the return leg, I missed my Air France flight because NO COMPUTER SCREEN in CDG (Charles de Gaulle airport) had the flight listed. By the time I located the terminal of the flight, it was 45 minutes before take-off and despite not having carry ons and perhaps 5-10 people in the line for tickets, I was told the flight was closed and I was not going to be able to board...... The flight did take off -- about an hour later and I had to get a hotel room and get on another airline at $1200 to get back to the States today. My question is if anyone has been in this situation and for some guidance if I could ever get the money back. Air France was not very helpful when I told them of the situation and the agent practically laughed at what my fare credit would bring for a future, nearby date return flight. Instead of paying $3500 for their flight, I got on the blessed internet and I used American to get back to the states. I appreciate any responses. And, when in Paris, call and definitely get your terminal for your flight before you go to that crazy airport where it takes 30 minutes to go from one terminal to another. Thanks again!

I want my money

Snyder — Thu, 06 Jul 2006 14:30:47 -0800

My paycheck is late again. I'm starting the second month of my job, and my fourth paycheck is now a day late. Of the 4 checks I've been due (including this one,) 2 have been late, the first one by 5 days. It's a small company, and the owner writes the checks herself, but to my mind, this is totally unacceptable. I don't have any real savings, so getting my checks on time is vital. According to other employees, this is a reoccuring event. I'm already looking for another job, but that might take some time, and I'd like to do something in the meantime, either with the boss, or through some official agency. If it helps, I live in Tucson, Arizona.

I'd like most to get my checks on time, but if I can't do that (or even if I can,) I'd like to do something about it that makes my displeasure known or brings in some kind of governmental/third party oversite. Any ideas?

Give me hope, give me some 'late achiever' stories!

razzman — Mon, 19 Jun 2006 13:38:00 -0800

I'm almost 31 and though I have had some achievements in life they're not spectacular. Most of the time when I see a biog in the paper the 'achiever' was already doing well from a very early age. To give me hope that achieving at this stage in life is possible I would like to hear of people who went on to make great achievements relatively late in their life (ie 30+) with not much happening before then. These can be anybody, famous or people you know, in any field, both creative and career wise. I haven't defined great achievement but I mean something rather outstanding (unusual I suppose) rather than 'passed my driving test' or 'got married'.

Always hungry at night. How to minimize the damage?

clango — Wed, 01 Feb 2006 09:46:38 -0800

I'm pretty much always hungry at night. I work at home, mostly at night. What's the least bad, most filling thing I can eat? I'm not fat, just a little squishy. Trying to focus on eating fruit but it doesn't always work out that way.

Don't wake me I plan on sleeping in...

twiggy — Thu, 10 Nov 2005 07:46:38 -0800

How do I break a 12+ year old habit of staying up too late? Is there such a thing as being addicted to staying up late? Or would it be addiction to sleep deprivation? Back when I was in high school (12+ years ago now?) I was quite the insomniac. I so hated lying awake in bed trying to fall asleep that eventually, I gave up. Instead, I would just stay up really late until my eyes were so heavy I knew I could finally pass out without tossing and turning for 2 hours.

Over time, even as falling asleep has become easier (yet still no picnic - I'm tremendously jealous of people who can fall asleep in 15 minutes), I have been unable to force myself to go to bed at a reasonable hour. I procrastinate going to bed, EVEN when I'm tired! I'll find things to do to stay up (chat with friends over IM, browse the web, watch TV, read a book) and I won't get to bed until 1:30 or 2am when I work at 9am the next morning. It's as if I'm hopelessly addicted to staying up late.

The obvious response is "just go to bed earlier dumbass!" Yeah, I know. I even read a book called The Promise of Sleep, and after hearing about how bad sleep deprivation is to us, you'd think it would motivate me to get my ass in bed. I just can't do it. Does anyone have similar experience? Has anyone overcome this?

I should add that during this time - I have been in a variety of physical states as far as sedentary versus active throughout the years. Even during times where I was getting regular exercise, this has still been a problem.

Lastly, as far as "how does this affect your life adversely?":
- It makes waking up on time a challenge
- Being tired all day makes me lose focus/motivation at work
- It's easier to become irritable (luckily I'm not perpetually grumpy though)
- Surely this can't be good for my health.

Dealing with a tardy cow-orker.

crunchland — Thu, 15 Sep 2005 07:20:28 -0800

Help with a perpetually tardy co-worker. My wife has been frustrated for quite some time with a co-worker who is perpetually late. When her hours were set so she was supposed to arrive at 9am, she'd show up at 10:30. When her hours were changed so she was supposed to come in at 10, she'd show up at 11 or 12. Management inexplicably turns a blind eye to the situation. However, it is affecting the rest of the office, since this woman's tardiness means that her work-product doesn't get done until others who need to process it are getting ready to head out the door, and sometimes end up working late to get their jobs done. Other workers end up pitching in and covering for her. As far as I know, direct confrontation either doesn't work, or has caused so much ill-will that the small office environment can't cope with it. And the woman realizes she is lackadaisical about it, but either can't or won't change her habits.

I suggested to my wife that she and the other people in the office start showing up late, too, and force management's hand to do something about it. But my wife doesn't see that as a useful option, as she doesn't want to jeopardize her standing with management.

So can anyone suggest any novel ways of dealing with this perpetually late pest?

Why are some people chronically late?

grumblebee — Wed, 24 Nov 2004 09:53:27 -0800

Why are some people chronically late? I have a hard time understanding such people, because I am chronically early. I know some people are late because they have very busy lives, but those aren't the types that interest me (I can understand why they are late). I'm interested in those folks who are always late for no apparent reason. The type you have to invite an hour before the event actually starts, knowing that this will make them only twenty-minutes late, instead of an-hour-and-twenty-minutes late.

I've theorized that chronic latecomers are people that are so caught up in-the-moment that the smallest thing can distract them from a later goal. For instance, I had a latecomer friend who used to say things like, "sorry I'm late. I was getting dressed to come see you, and then I noticed my guitar leaning against the wall. I started playing a few chords, and before I knew it, two hours had passed..." I've also theorized that some people are really bad at estimating how long tasks will take. They leave at 5:55 because they estimate that it will take them 5 minutes to walk to the cinema for a 6pm movie. Whereas someone better able to estimate durations would allow 20 minutes.

I've know people who are chronically late and also continually surprised that they're late. I know people who swear up and down that THIS time they will be on time. But I know they will be late again, and I'm always right. I've also known a SMALL number of people who say things like, "well, I'll probably be late, because I always am."

I know part of my chronic earliness stems from a world view that things often go wrong. If I estimate that it will take me 20 minutes to get somewhere, I will leave 35 minutes before the event in order to give myself some slack in case the subway breaks down or whatever.

I would love to hear from you latecomers about what goes on in your lives and heads when you are late. I can't vouch for other AskMe folks, but I won't chastise you. I don't really feel like I'm "right" and you're "wrong." We may irritate each other a bit, but it's mostly just a personality difference. I'm really interested in how your minds differ from mine.

Latecomers, why are you late? When you ARE late, do you feel guilty about it? Or do you feel like lateness is just a part of life. Do you feel like people should plan events around latecomers -- should plays always start ten-minutes late? Do you feel like people who are early or on-time (or berate latecomers) are too anal and need to relax?