Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with inheritance

Answering the annoying "what do you do" question, and then some

Anonymous — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 08:09:58 -0800

I recently inherited enough money that will allow me to not work again. I still want to do things - volunteer, help others, keep busy, etc. How do I explain this to others and answer questions that people ask? I'm 32, and have spent the last couple of years dabbling in this and that, but not ever really feeling satisfied. So I don't have a job or career that I can or wish to stay in. I'm not married, and don't have kids (and do not plan to ever have kids, much as I love them on a part-time basis)

What I really like to do, and what gives me a sense of fulfillment, is doing things for people. It's always given me a sense of purpose, and I want to spend my days doing volunteering and trying to lend a hand to make things better for people. Even if it's hard, even if people don't say "thank you," it still makes me happy to try.

What I feel is holding me back, however, is a sense of self-consciousness and perhaps guilt. I know I didn't earn this money, and though I own it, I don't feel a sense of satisfaction that one would have if they earned it themselves. I'm immensely grateful for it and trying to take care of it and use/invest it wisely, but it feels a bit weird. I don't like to talk about it. Inevitable questions about "what do you do" or "how do you make a living" or "how can you do what you do" make me terribly uncomfortable. I'm young enough that it feels really stupid to say I'm "retired." I never know what to tell people, and feel like a brat to say "I inherited it."

Are there non-obnoxious ways of answering these inevitable questions? What can I tell people who are just naturally curious, when I feel self-conscious about it? E-mail at anonaskmetafi@gmail.com

Can we track our inheritance?

Anonymous — Wed, 06 Feb 2013 17:13:29 -0800

We had some money in Switzerland, we don't know where it is. Now what? My father always told us our inheritance was locked up in a fund of funds in Zurich and that on his passing we'd get complete instructions on how to access it from his lawyer. He passed away about 10 years ago but no documentation on the account was ever found. We don't even know what institution it was banked with. Is there any way for us to track this money down now or in the future?

One of these citizenships is not like the other...

Madamina — Thu, 03 Jan 2013 08:13:37 -0800

My friend, a dual Canadian/American citizen living in the UK, is discussing the terms of a trust with her (US) father. By the time she inherits, she may have given up US citizenship. Does this need to be mentioned so they can account for it now? Added info, from her:
--I'm pretty sure the letter I get every year says that it's an irrevocable trust, so I'm not sure the trust can be rewritten.
--Dr. Internet is being unhelpful to me: it's telling me a lot about what happens if a non-US citizen spouse inherits, but children have different legal standing.
--I would keep Canadian citizenship.
--If me being a non-US citizen would be a huge PITA, then I'd much prefer he just rewrite the trust so it all goes to my sister.

Thanks (on behalf of both of us)!

Help me save my inheritance.

Anonymous — Wed, 12 Dec 2012 13:07:18 -0800

Help me save my inheritance. I'm about to inherit roughly $750k from the family trust when my remaining parent passes away. The trust is a mix of stocks, bonds, funds etc. that will be split with my other siblings. This is in the US.

My wife and I have no kids, a modest mortgage ($85k) and a small amount of debt (>$5k). We earn about $20 - 40k as self-employed artists and live very frugally. This inheritance will be a big change for us.

Help me to set up my own trust and wisely invest this money.

What is some sage advice on wealth and investing? Where is there good information on learning to invest and track investments? What are some alternative ways to invest? What financial consultants would you recommend?

Any and all advice is much appreciated.

Splitting the I-Bond Baby

Clyde Mnestra — Fri, 07 Dec 2012 05:52:04 -0800

Sibling and I have inherited ten U.S. savings bonds (I series), purchased at various times and maturing in 2030-2036. We just want to divvy them up equally, but they are not naturally paired (i.e., purchased two at a time). What's fairest? We have no experience with bonds or their valuation. Strikes me that we could divide based on price plus present accrued interest, but that would ignore (I think) the future value of the bonds with different rates/yields. At the other extreme, we could balance the value at time of final maturity, but not sure how to calculate that.

Basically, we just want to be approximately even in distributing the bonds, recognizing that some cash payment will be necessary to make up the difference. Let's put aside the possibility of selling all of them now and splitting the proceedings, and assume we want to hold them. Any other ideas?

Happy to give any other critical information, but would just as soon avoid typing out all the specs. Thanks!

Differences in tax liability for joint home owning options?

Tooty McTootsalot — Wed, 05 Dec 2012 20:18:30 -0800

My partner and I are about to buy a house together, and we're trying to decide how to do this. We're gay, and hence technically unmarried, and we're trying to figure out the tax implications of the different options. We're trying to decide between two options: (1) joint tenants with rights of survivorship, and (2) tenants in common. The reason we'd want to do with (2) is because with tenants in common, we can specify the amounts of the house we own. And since we put unequal amounts of money down, and we'd like for that to be reflected in the deed. In our state, however, (2) does not come with the rights of survivorship. We have both prepared wills that leave all property to the other person.

So either way, the other person will get their half of the property upon our death, but are there any differences in the tax liability on the surviving spouse? Is there any benefit to do rights of survivorship over specifying someone in their will?

I have a feeling this is a 'no', but I wanted to make sure. And is there anything else we should be thinking of?

Where to store an inheritance.

Anonymous — Sat, 29 Sep 2012 18:53:33 -0800

How in invest inherited money? I inherited about $75k from my grandparents, which was recently transferred to me (I'm 25). I have a Roth IRA which I just opened and has been maxed out for this year ($5000). I have an emergency savings account of $10k, and I'm currently temping so I have somewhat unstable employment and generally expect to make about 28-35k a year (hopefully not forever, but realistically probably for the next couple of years).

I'm wondering how I should handle this money. I would like to max out my IRA for the next couple of years, and I can't do that on my current income. Does it make sense to set aside some of this recently acquired money as liquid assets to feed the IRA for the next few years? Or will it waste potential if it sits as cash instead of being invested?

I probably won't look into buying a home for ~10 years, but I may want to get a graduate education within the next five years or so. I don't know anything really about the tax penalties for liquidating invested money, so I'm not sure how much of this to invest, in what kinds of stocks/bonds/whatever, and at what risk profile.

If you were me, what would you do with this money?

What to do with underwater house as part of an estate?

bottlebrushtree — Tue, 07 Aug 2012 12:58:44 -0800

Possible inherited underwater house in New York, what to do? Walkaway? Advice? My relative is the executor for their parent's estate. The estate is basically a small amount of cash and a house with a $500,000 mortgage. It's possibly underwater though it's a little unclear after talking to multiple real estate agents.

Besides the house related expenses (mortgage, property tax, ongoing maintenance) there are no other bills or debts )

The house has been refinanced multiple times in the last decade and there is a chance that the dead relative was taken advantage of. The relative believes they have most of the refinance paperwork. The mortgage is now held by OCWEN. There is about 500k left and the interest rate is 6.something %. Paperwork that they have shows some sleazy behavior on the side of the outside person who did the refinance.

They have had some advice by one of the realtors to have the estate "walk away" from the house but they are unclear about what they should do. They have an basic estate lawyer but he is not qualified for this type of question.

Their questions:

1) Who should they talk to in New York (eastern Suffolk county) regarding possible loan modifications or possibly a law suit involving the refinance company?

2) What would be involved in "walking away" as an executor of a estate.

3) Any other advice?

They wish to do the ethical thing as well as possible get value out of the estate if any is possible. They would rather not spend years of their life dealing with the estate.

Thank you.

You are not my estate lawyer, finance lady, or tax guy. Can you help me find that person?

Anonymous — Fri, 01 Jun 2012 14:44:46 -0800

Grandma set up an uneven trust and we want to distribute it equally. Who do we talk to and what do we ask them? Questions about imbalanced inheritances, DIY redistribution of wealth, and taxes within... Situation: My father passed away recently, and a trust that his mother set up is being disbursed to my half-sister and me in the next 1-3 months. The total amount of the trust is about $108k (before assorted administrative fees, TBD, are taken out).

For reasons known only to her, my grandmother set up the trust to go 3/4 to me and 1/4 to my half-sister. I'd like to divide the money equally (unsurprisingly, half-sister is also ok with this plan). The bank which administers the trust says they can't change the distribution, so it's up to us to do it independently. I'm in Massachusetts and my half-sister's in New York; the trust was set up in New Jersey but is now administered by a big nationwide bank with offices in Philadelphia.

This is my first time being An Heiress and I could use some guidance. It's understood that you are not my lawyer, finance lady or tax guy; I'm looking for help finding the right person and asking them the right questions.

Things I'm considering now:
-Is it worth revisiting the distribution issue with the bank to see if there's a way they can divide things 50/50? They told me their hands are tied legally by the trust; could a financial or legal expert achieve different results?
-What are the income tax implications from receiving an inheritance from a trust, and what is the best way to minimize them? (Half of the trust is about a years' salary for me, so if it's counted as income it's a significant jump.)
-If I transfer a big chunk of what I inherit to someone else, what's the best way to estimate the taxes I'll be asked to pay on that particular chunk of money, as opposed to the inheritance I keep and my usual income, so that we can account for it fairly?
-I understand that there's a gift tax which I'm responsible for if I give an individual more than $13,000 in a year - what's the best way to avoid/minimize gift tax issues in this case, especially given that I would prefer to transfer all the money at once?

I'm happy to read answers/theories on the questions above, but what I could most use help with are:
-What type of expert or experts should I enlist to help walk me through this process - lawyer? Accountant? Financial adviser? Other?
-What vital questions have I neglected to consider?

Thanks for your help, AskMe!

How does Irish inheritance work?

plonkee — Wed, 30 May 2012 05:18:04 -0800

What can you tell me about Irish inheritance, wills and power of attorney and similar legal things? My father unexpectedly died very recently, and my siblings and I have been sorting out his affairs. He kept good records and a will, which is very helpful.

However, my grandmother has Alzheimers and is in a nursing home in Ireland, and my (elderly) grandfather and dad transferred my grandparents' Irish property (or possibly part-transferred?) into my dad's name. Dad had also been dealing with some or most of their affairs on their behalf, possibly with a power of attorney obtained when my grandmother was slightly more competent. The only difference between the Irish and English wills is how many of us siblings are named as executors. We have found some information about dad's Irish affairs. but not much

I'm fairly familiar with English law on things like this. I know the basics, where to find information, and can judge when I will need help. I don't really know anything about Irish law and am not quite sure where to start - and I want to understand things better before we talk to dad's Irish solicitor.

Can you tell me what you know, and where I should look for information?

Help me figure out what's going on

northxnorthwest — Wed, 21 Mar 2012 00:07:05 -0800

Needing advice from an estate lawyer or someone with thorough knowledge of how trusts work. My father passed away in December 2009 after a battle with pancreatic cancer. Because both my brother and I are under 30, he left his fiance as executer.

I just learned that the final amount of inheritance is around $160,000.00. This figure seems completely baffling to me and I would like someone to help me figure out what is going on.

Because I live outside of the country (and for whatever reason), it has been very difficult trying to get information from the lawyers and his fiance about how the money was distributed, despite numerous emails to her.

The amount in his checking account before he died was $125,000.00 alone. He also left the life insurance to his fiance with the idea that she would distribute it to both my brother and I. She is extremely well off and I see no reason why she would want to keep it for herself. He left the 401-k to my uncle with the same idea. This should have also been put into the trust. He had two properties, which were sold, and the amount put into the trust. Here are my questions:

1. When I received a notice that probate had ended, it stated that the amount in lawyer fees was $9,000.00 and the amount in accounting fees was $1,200.00. Isn't this extremely high?
2. Are there taxes or fees I am not aware of that would reduce the amount substantially?
3. What are my legal rights in this case?

The reason I am freaking out is because I am currently living on $16,000.00 a year and was just accepted into grad school. I have no savings, no assets and my father was extremely frugal in his life which allowed him to accrue a decently sized retirement (he was just 2 years away). It makes me extremely angry that his hard work just melted into nothing.

Thanks in advance.

Inheritance law question: death of named party prior to death of estate's owner?

Anonymous — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 08:35:00 -0800

Inheritance law question: death of named party prior to death of estate's owner? Here's the situation (in brief). I'd like to contact an outside lawyer, but I figured I'd try asking here as well to see what kinds of questions I could/should ask.

My grandmother is closing in on 90. My mother is terminally ill, and at this point it's anyone's guess who will pass first. My father is still alive, and in my mother's will, all of her assets go to him.

My grandmother has some property, cash, and life insurance. In her estate, her son is heir to 50%, my mother 35%, and myself and my siblings the other 15%. Her son is unmarried.

I understand that in most states, inheritances are considered non-marital property. So, my main question is, where does my mother's share go if my mother is no longer alive when my grandmother passes? And if my grandmother passes first, and the inheritance is considered non-marital property, does that go to her descendants on her death, or would they still consult her will?

Right now, my grandmother isn't aware enough of the situation to do anything about it. A trustee was appointed, and he seems to be of the thinking that her percentage should all go to my father. To the point where he doesn't seem to want to make any changes to the estate, and doesn't seem willing to listen to any sort of concern regarding the situation. He's sided with my father in the matter.

Personally, knowing my family history and how my grandmother felt, I believe she'd want for the estate to be shared among her grandchildren. Her son doesn't particularly care about money, but the way it's structured now he'll be more than set himself.

This has the potential to really blow the hell up in the family, and I'm not sure how to deal with it.

What to do with inherited stuff/antiques?

meantime — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 11:31:25 -0800

I have just inherited about one hundred boxes full of 40-100 year old stuff from 2 or 3 generations. I can't really use any of it and some of it may be very valuable. How can I best assess the values of the thousands of items so that I can sell/donate/throw out everything? Within the boxes are over one thousand books (many of which are hand bound), many sets of dinnerware (much of which is hand painted and some silver), various pieces of art, old magazines and various random but seemingly quality pieces. This is mixed with a whole bunch of junk that appears to be the remains of hoarders. Its possible, however, that even some of the junk might be interesting to some given its age/quality/category.

I have to do something with this stuff and though I think at least half of it isn't worth anything - I don't know how to begin sorting through it all. There are thousands of items here and I'm afraid to throw anything out because maybe one small piece that seems like "junk" might actually be of value - if not financially, then perhaps to someone.

Ideally, I would get rid of the "junk" and then clean up and sort the rest of it to present to people who might be interested. But this has been difficult for me to do.

Further complications:

- the stuff is full of dust, etc, so at least the initial stages are 'dirty work' that I can't do in random slots of free time - i have to dedicate half or full days so that i don't waste my time cleaning

- I have to move through it relatively quickly because space is limited and the boxes have to be cleared

- The items are in the Czech Republic (so am I) and primarily of Czech and German origin - so besides having no background in antiques, I have limited ways to educate myself in what might have value or how to locate people who might be interested in these items (i.e., i can't google search each item nor do I know if this is stuff for Sotheby's or a Czech version of ebay)

How do people go through this process when someone passes? Is there a best practices for something like this? Any suggestions given the special circumstances?

I'm pretty sure the Bluth family is a terrible role model here

Harry Potter and the Puppet of Sock — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 13:48:38 -0800

I'm inheriting $100,000. My parents are inheriting a lot more (around $1mil, but we're not sure the exact amount). Please give us advice. We're in the US (New Mexico). I want to put mine away and get as much interest as possible. I would also consider buying instead of renting (a house or condo or apartment or something) if that is a good idea. But I am guessing that it is not on account of me not needing much space and so apartments are good, and also if the house gets termites or plumbing things or falls apart in some other exciting way I have no ability whatsoever to fix it.

I may spend some of the yearly interest when I get it (probably on travel and possibly health insurance, since my job doesn't have it and I have to go off my parents' in a few years).

I'm totally willing to hire someone to help with it. Or go to a class or something. If you guys have any recommendations on that-- people/classes in New Mexico-- feel free to leave 'em.

My parents are way better at this sort of stuff than I am, but they still have never seen anywhere near this amount of money in their lives, so after paying off the house-- which they already did-- they have general ideas of what to do but are also happy to take any general advice.

Sockpuppeting because I don't really want everyone who knows me to know I got a big chunk of money. I live pretty frugally and want to stay that way.

How do wills work?

cincinnatus c — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 15:35:48 -0800

What is the standard way that divorced parents with new partners (who also have children) organise their wills? My mother is in a long-term relationship (20+ years) with, but not married to, a man who has a daughter. Together they own a house.

My girlfriend's father is also in a long-term relationship with a woman with several children, and the couple live in a house that they own together.

I imagine this setup is quite common nowadays.

How do people in such situations organise their wills? I know little about this side of life, but I'd imagine that married couples who only have children with each other would generally have wills leaving everything to the other half. Only when the second parent died would the children, by default, come into it.

I honestly think that if my mother were to die and her partner lived on for another 20 years or so, I wouldn't have much communication with him. He's a decent guy, but we don't have much to say to each other as it is. That being the case, would I get a call after those 20 years, when he did die, to tell me I had a share in a house? That would seem weird, but then again the opposite would seem weird.

NOTE: my mother is not likely to die any time soon, and if she did I'm not that bothered about owning a share in her house. I am not in dispute with anyone about this, and I don't anticipate being so. I am asking out of idle curiosity.

NOTE 2: I'm in the UK, if that matters in legal terms. But, again, note that I'm looking for pretty general answers based on standard practice. I'm not really excited about claiming any inheritance or anything, and based on lifestyle I'd be surprised if I outlived my mother. I'm just sort of curious about how these things work.

Death and taxes

TLCplz — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 17:59:53 -0800

My father died and left me and my sister his house. He willed her 2/3 and me 1/3. She's currently living in the house and I am not. I would like my 1/3 in money so I can buy my own place. My sister is not willing to hand over the cash and says she will put the house on the market next year. We do have a really good relationship when it comes to anything other than money, meaning I don't push the issue because she reacts unfavorably. What are my options?

can gain access to what my father left behind?

Anonymous — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 11:44:24 -0800

some years back my father was re-married before his death. my father did not have a will in place and i am his only child. after his death the women he married ended contact with me sharing none of my fathers belongings etc. at the time i felt wronged, and as a young man i could not afford legal representation. many years (over ten) have gone by, and i have mostly moved on with my life trying not to think of these events, but there still is a bit of anger inside. as his only child and living blood relation is there any way legally that i can gain access to as much as old photographs, clothing, or whatever small momentos that remain in her custody?

Advice on selling collections from an estate

Luke Skywalker — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 10:29:35 -0800

I'm looking for general and specific advice about striking a balance between value and ease in selling a few disparate items from an estate. My father died recently. It was unexpected so little thought had been given to the disposition of his possessions. He had a will in place that transfers everything to my mom so I expect no issues there. We are a small and tight knit family with excellent communication and we will talk out issues of what individuals want to keep versus selling so I don't need advice there.

Dad had a few fair-sized collections in a few areas that we probably will not want or be able to keep most of. I'm thinking about how to sell these things with a few considerations in mind:

1. Value. My mom is retired and on a fixed income. Her position is secure but certainly not luxurious and I'd like her to enjoy the benefit of as much value from these possessions as possible.

2. Ease and speed. My siblings and I live in the same state as our mom but not so close that we can manage day trips unless we take the whole day off or on weekends. Transporting or storing these things away from Mom's house would be difficult. I'd also like whatever we do to impugn as little on Mom's life as we can manage. Finally, my mom is most likely going to want to sell the house within a year or so (that's a whole other topic these days but for the sake of argument assume this won't be a problem).

The specifics: probably the most substantial issue is a large collection of very high quality woodcarving hand tools, some dating back to the 40s/50s. Given how they have been kept and used the value in these is likely to be most as tools rather than as antiques/collectibles. They in many cases are of the highest quality, thoroughly used but well maintained. None of us know much about tools.

Another significant collection is of film photography equipment: a number of cameras, lenses and related tools/accessories/luggage. Again, nobody has a lot of knowledge about this.

Finally, a library of books. I'm guessing most of these are worth little, but it dates back again to the 40s/50s and there may be some rare philosophy books, first editions etc. in the mix.

In general the options seem to be to hold an estate sale, or an auction, or to try to bring in dealers to take on whole collections. Trying to piece stuff out and sell it individually doesn't feel like it is logistically possible. Are there options/approaches I'm missing?

We'll have professional financial advice but just looking ahead, any idea how the taxes in a situation like this work out? Does Mom pay taxes on the possessions up front or would we wait to pay taxes on the income from their sale? This is in MN in the USA.

Any input about how to publicize/seek dealers etc. for the specific types of items is appreciated. I'd like advice about whether we should try to single out any items of particularly high value for individual sale, and any advice about how to approach that if so. If you've been through a process like this, any advice about how it went, managing the logistics, unexpected issues is welcome. Thanks for your input.

How many of the 1%-ers are rags to riches?

critzer — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 10:31:23 -0800

Is there a solid independent study showing the percentage of 1% wealthiest who were born into money vs. those born poor who worked for it?

I'd rather have a pot of money than an empty lot.

Anonymous — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 15:49:24 -0800

I spent a large chunk of inheritance money on a real estate purchase, and now I want it back. My husband doesn't agree with this feeling. There are of course special circumstances and emotions involved. About a year and a half ago, my father passed away. His death was expected and I knew in advance that I would receive a certain amount of money as an inheritance. What I did not know at the time was that he had an additional life insurance policy with my brother and me as beneficiaries, and we each essentially ended up receiving double the inheritance we had expected.

I had already had a plan for the amount I expected to receive, which involved spending a certain amount and saving a certain amount. When it turned out there was more than I had originally planned for, it opened up new opportunities. One thing I ended up doing with a large chunk of it was buying a piece of real estate with my husband. We paid cash for a piece of property with a tear-down house, and have since shelled out a few thousand dollars for the demolition of the home and some landscaping work. We now have a garage left on the property which we have talked about adding an apartment to, and the option to build in the future if we'd like.

While my father's death was no surprise, the array of feelings and circumstances I have found myself in since his passing have left me feeling at time a bit adrift. For instance, immediately after he passed away, I left my job of several years, took the summer more or less "off" and then started graduate school, only to decide I did not have an interest in the program I was pursuing. So, I ended up going back to my old job but after a year I am again ready to move on and would really like to take a few months to spend time with my family on the opposite side of the country before again pursuing something that I am truly interested in. It is my feeling in retrospect that I minimized the amount of time I would need to really let myself feel my way through the grieving process, and I have spent a large amount of time in the last year and a half trying to work very hard and stay very busy, but I see now that if I had just let myself have more time to process and think about what was really important to me, many of my choices might have been different.

I am feeling very much like I wish that I had not spent the money on the property at the time we did. I feel as though I took money that had been left to me as a gift and turned it into an investment for my husband and myself, but which I would personally rather get the benefit from now. This of course gets blurry when I start trying to think through the ins and outs of "our" money vs. "my" money, but it may also be helpful to clarify that we only married a little over a year ago and all of this is new.

I feel like if I had not spent the money on the property I would have an additional safety net now that I do not. My husband feels like it was a good investment that we can leverage in the future and he thinks I am being impractical to have a desire to spend some of it freely. I cannot figure out if I am just being too emotional and would like some outside advice and perspective.

"We're giving it all to them, but don't worry, they have your best interests at heart!"

Anonymous — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 07:09:11 -0800

My aged parents are planning to cash in all their stocks and put them into an account in my two brothers' names to reduce the amount of money payable in fees to the government upon their demise. They have told me, more or less, not to worry, and not to doubt the good intentions of my siblings. How to respond to this? My aged mother recently informed me that, in order to reduce the estate administration (probate) fees payable to the government upon her and my father's demise, they were going to sell all their stocks (wherein their wealth is concentrated) now and put the money into a joint account in my brothers' names. These same brothers have been helping them put their financial affairs in order, while (for different reasons) my sister and I are out of the picture with regard to all this.

When my mother first told me of their plan (over the phone), I expressed some mixture of surprise and concern, and her response to that suggested that she hadn't considered that my brother(s) might not be entirely worthy of their absolute trust. An accountant friend I mentioned these developments to (who has seen his fair share of nasty estate battles!) encouraged me to speak with a lawyer promptly, which I did.

The lawyer (a specialist in estate law with fifty years of experience) said their idea was terrible and ALWAYS leads to problems later on. He recommended another way of leaving their money in which probate fees could be avoided (known in Canada as an inter vivos or living trust).

I reported back to my father by email with what the lawyer had said. He wrote back that they were aware of such trusts, and that I need not worry about the fact that I am thousands of miles away from my brothers, that they "have [my] best interests at heart," and that my parents are leaving clear instructions how the money should be distributed upon their demise.

While they may indeed have faith in the good intentions of my brothers, it is no secret to anyone who has had the misfortune to hear more than a dozen tales of inheritance that the road to estate separation hell is paved with good intentions (especially when the legal foundation for those good intentions is weak or entirely missing).

I should emphasize that I am not stating that I believe they will not distribute the estate according to my parents' wishes. Structurally, however, the situation is leaving me (and my sister) entirely at the whim of their willingness to operate according to the highest ethical standard. I already have evidence, however, that such is not the manner of operation I can look forward to. (This "evidence," however, was clearly not taken as a sign of any failing of character when I pointed it out to my mother.) I might also mention that I have have exceedingly limited communication with my siblings in the decades since we lived together as children. We are also separated, as I mentioned, by thousands of miles, and i have only returned for visits to their area twice, since I moved away many many years ago. We cannot be called close or tightly-knit by any stretch of the imagination.

Another odd thing, from my point of view, is the fact that this is all being done to avoid paying what amounts to 1.5% of the value of the estate. That's $15,000 on $1,000,000. Not, in my estimation, a sum worth sowing the seeds of future sibling discord over. But my parents seem determined to refuse to even consider the possibility that there could be a negative outcome (for me, and, possibly, my sister) here. Which leads me to wonder if something else is going on here that is not being expressed verbally or directly (and of which my parents may not even be fully aware on a conscious level themselves).

I don't know if, at this point, I could provide even a mountain of evidence that their plan is misguided and have it be accepted by them as input worth considering (but then, I am the youngest and have never been taken seriously anyway...). But I am nonetheless interested in hearing the stories of others who have been in a similar situation, or from those of you who may have something to offer in the way of a more effective response to all this than my present one of just letting them all carry on in the direction they seem to be going with no interference from me.

Thank you for reading, and looking forward to your comments!

Can I get a loan against my inheritance?

Anonymous — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 16:37:51 -0800

My father died in February and I have an inheritance coming, probably around the end of the year, but at this moment that isn't soon enough to keep the wolves from the door. It seems silly that I know I have this mid-five-figures amount coming, and may become homeless before I get it. Does anyone have any ideas about how I can get some breathing room? For instance, is it possible to get a short-term loan using the inheritance as collateral? Any other creative ideas?

Setting up a trust: what to do with CDs?

TWinbrook8 — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 17:39:26 -0800

My brother and I are helping our elderly mother set up a trust with the help of a lawyer. She has signed over her assets, house deeds, car title, stocks, bank accounts etc to the trust. She also has a number of CDs that we were led to believe would go into the trust as well. But now they're not? The CDs have my mother's name and also my name or my brother's name (or another heir) on them. (I don't have a statement with me and I can't remember the exact wording.) My mother did this so it was very clear who would inherit what. We gave the CD account numbers with all the other information to the lawyer who is setting up the trust and now, months later, it is finally happening. At our meeting with him last week, everything was signed and then, as we were getting up to leave, I had a question about the CDs and that's when he said they would not be part of the trust, that the next time they are due to be renewed, my mother should take her name off them and turn them over to the heirs.

Huh, wha? Does this make sense? We had always discussed them as being part of the trust that we would eventually inherit. Aren't the tax implications pretty severe if she turns them over to us now (for instance, mine comes due again in December)? We're talking very low six figures here. Sure I could use some of the money now but not all of it and I certainly don't want to lose a whack of it to the IRS if I don't have to.

I guess in a perfect world, I would like a portion of it in December and the remainder put into a new CD in both our names like before and have that go into the trust. Is this possible/advisable? This is in NH and you are not my lawyer.

Will I need to pay taxes on this inheritance?

miskatonic — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 08:05:46 -0800

Will I need to pay taxes on this inheritance? I think this is probably a fairly straightforward question, but my Googling yielded inconsistent results. I inherited a small amount of money (a couple thousand dollars) from my grandmother and am just curious about whether I should plan on paying taxes on it. I'm a resident of New York and my grandmother was a resident of Massachusetts, if it matters.

Help me take ownership over my inheritance.

Tooty McTootsalot — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 19:22:24 -0800

I am a noob when it comes to money matters, and need advice on how to take ownership of my inheritance. About a decade ago, I received an decently sized inheritance, think around ~$100k. It's gone up and down, paid for a few major items, and is currently hovering around half its initial value.

The only way I interface with this money is through a Merrill Lynch financial advisor. He lives about 8 hours away, and because I despise talking on the phone (and he doesn't do business over e-mail) I rarely am in touch with him. I know right now my money is sitting in a decent performing fund, and it's been sitting there a while. When I initially got it, it'd been in a well performing actively managed fund. This is all I know. The only time I ever really talk with him is when I want to pull out money, which is maybe once a year.

I'm so out of touch that in order to write this post, I had to go into my online account to even see what kind of fees I'm being charged. It looks like I'm only being charged $125 a year, and additionally when money is moved around. Right now, my money is just sitting in one spot, so it's just the $125 a year.

My partner and I also just had a child, so we are thinking more about getting ourselves in better financial shape. We need to start a 529 for him, open Roth IRAs, etc. And I'd like to start actually contributing to my account, rather than just taking money away from it.

My first idea was to just find a Merrill Lynch advisor locally. I assume I can switch up who I deal with. This may help, because I vastly prefer to face-to-face meetings than phone calls. But then I didn't know - do I even really need a financial advisor? And should I stick with Merrill Lynch, or find someone new? If I change from Merrill Lynch, how would I even go about doing that? Is Merrill Lynch like a bank, where I'd have to actively take my money out of it? Or is it like an interface to another entity where I can just switch out to a new interface? Or can I have no middle man at all, and just deal with the fund myself?

When I have something like this, I like to research and know what I'm doing from first principles, but here, I was just given this account, and this advisor attached to it, and I really have no clue how it works. I think that's why I've avoided dealing with it for so long. Thanks for any help you can give, feel free to talk to me like I'm five. I'm completely lost.