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Should we move for more money/career advancement?

My husband was laid off from his job a few weeks ago. We have a toddler and live in Chicago. I've lived here forever, all of my family and friends are here, and I have a job I love here. So far, he hasn't come across any opportunities in this area, but we've seen some great looking job postings in smaller cities in flyover states. (Think Des Moines and Omaha.) Should he consider pursuing these opportunities, or should we stay where we are and struggle along? [more inside]
posted by GirlLikesBeer on Jul 22, 2014 - 25 answers

Is this food poisoning, stomach flu, or something else?

None Of You Is My Doctor, but before I spend money and time at Urgent Care, I'd like to ask those of you who have experienced this kind of thing if what I am going through right now is something you just have to wait out, or if I need to go see someone. (Warning: discussion of vomiting and other bodily functions inside.) [more inside]
posted by tzikeh on Jul 11, 2014 - 22 answers

How to deal with cards I have been dealt?

I was always a very high achiever but in my late teens, I was diagnosed with a debilitating chronic illness. I spent most of my 20s severely limited. In my mid 30s now and still struggling with the feeling that life is unfair. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 30, 2014 - 16 answers

Can I wait for two months to go to the doctor for this?

I found a lump in my armpit and will be getting it checked out by a doctor. Unfortunately, I work in a contact-based job and my next contract is schedule to begin in August. My benefits, including health insurance, will be in place again at that time, but I'm uninsured during summer months. Is this the sort of thing that can wait until I have insurance again or do I need to go to the doctor right now? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 25, 2014 - 24 answers

The Name as Subject Line==Severe Stuff convention: how did it start?

So I've noticed a convention that using someone's name--and only their name--as the subject line in the email message means that something pretty severe has happened to them. Like, if Jane Bloggs had a healthy baby, the subject line would be something like "Jane had a baby!", but if the subject line was just "Jane" or "Jane Bloggs" or "Aunt Jane" (assuming I'm Jane's nephew) then either Jane or her baby or both would be in the (N)ICU or more likely the morgue. I'm wondering where this started. Any help?
posted by tellumo on Jun 17, 2014 - 18 answers

Boyfriend's ex is seriously ill

My boyfriend's ex has leukemia. While she could recover if her bone marrow transplant is successful, there is a strong possibility that she could die. My boyfriend is very sad about her illness. This seems completely natural, and I want to be supportive. But at the same time, I am uncomfortable with what he has told me about his feelings. Are these feelings romantic? If not, how can I support him? [more inside]
posted by Triscuitier on May 27, 2014 - 40 answers

Graceful ways to explain spouse's chronic illness in social situations

I am having some difficulties explaining/trying not to explain my spouse's chronic health condition in social and work situations. I need some stock answers I can give for various occasions. [more inside]
posted by JoannaC on May 21, 2014 - 28 answers

Anyone else experience similar chronic illness symptoms?

Note: I am the patient. Describing the symptoms is pretty difficult task but I will try to do my best. The patient has not felt normal since sometime in October of 2013. The best way to describe it is a feeling as if patient is about to get sick. That feeling as if a sickness is coming on but never really comes on. This feeling is often strongest at night and continues throughout the day and will be gone by night. This toxic/sick feeling that radiates throughout the body seems to come and go at times. [more inside]
posted by kvoorhees on May 20, 2014 - 48 answers

Can I get better insurance than employer offers?

My husband's new job only offers one plan: a high deductible plan with $5,000 and $10,000 deductibles. We both have chronic illnesses with lots of medications and several doctors. We cannot afford to pay out of pocket for everything. What can I do? [more inside]
posted by threeturtles on Apr 7, 2014 - 19 answers

How do I get fit while I get sick?

I want to get fit because it would help my health long-term, but exercising more than a gentle walk makes me sick short-term, so I am stuck. I have specific restrictions on what I can do because of stroke risks, and expect to continue to frequently fall ill. I would like new ideas and especially advice from others with chronic illnesses that fluctuate on how they handle exercise. [more inside]
posted by viggorlijah on Mar 29, 2014 - 22 answers

Taking a cat on a vacation

It's not that I want to vacation with my cat, but he requires medication at this point twice daily and I don't want to leave him alone. [more inside]
posted by one4themoment on Mar 23, 2014 - 33 answers

YANMD, But Is It Worth Finding One?

I am sick on vacation and need to decide if it's necessary to see a doctor. [more inside]
posted by charmcityblues on Mar 12, 2014 - 25 answers

My brother died four days ago. My father is coping by being abusive.

My brother passed away on Monday. My father is coping by lashing out. What do I do? [more inside]
posted by TryTheTilapia on Mar 7, 2014 - 22 answers

How cold is too cold?

Hi there Hivemind, at what temperature (fahrenheit, preferably) does it become unsafe for a person to spend the night in a car? [more inside]
posted by feistycakes on Feb 28, 2014 - 19 answers

How to cheer up an ill parent

My dad's cancer has come back and he's lost a lot of energy in the last year. In the next few weeks, we and his doctors will be discussing treatment/chemo options. What can I do for him? [more inside]
posted by myntu on Feb 21, 2014 - 12 answers

Simple scientific guide for identifying and treating common illnesses?

When I start to feel a cold coming on, the last thing I want to do is spend time and energy trying to figure out the best treatment approach. I am seeking a guide that will help me identify and self-treat common/mild illnesses (both attacking the root cause and alleviating symptoms) as well as indicate when it would be wise to see a doctor. I would prefer a printout rather than an interactive tool like WebMD.
posted by gray17 on Feb 14, 2014 - 6 answers

What do I ask/tell my new doctor about my mental health?

I don't know what help I need anymore, or even if I need help. I have a lifelong history of depression and the past two and half years, I've experienced more life stressors than normal. The original reasons I made the appointment was to a. get a new script for my anti-anxiety medication (which is also meant to help my depression), especially as I accidentally abruptly ceased it over 5 days ago, and b. a referral to a new psychiatrist to prescribe ADHD medication. [more inside]
posted by b33j on Jan 27, 2014 - 2 answers

How to eke out a great Thankgiving while sick?

My SO has a lot of anxiety about holidays - and so we try do something to make them special. We're all sick (with colds). What can I do to still make this work? [more inside]
posted by lab.beetle on Nov 27, 2013 - 13 answers

Would it be ok to ask this person for a reference letter?

I haven't known him for that long. And am in a position of privilege [more inside]
posted by winterportage on Nov 23, 2013 - 17 answers

How do you know if a counsellor is a good fit?

How do you know if a counsellor is a good fit? [more inside]
posted by Year of meteors on Oct 30, 2013 - 8 answers

What to tell gossips about my husbands psych admission

My husband is spending some time in hospital to deal with his depression. This is a good thing and means he will be getting help. But I need help in framing how, and what, I tell different people. In particular gossipy people who ask what hospital he is in. [more inside]
posted by t0astie on Oct 28, 2013 - 16 answers

Explaining disossociation

Disossociating is a frequent problem I experience and I sometimes need to ask friends to help ground me. How can I explain what happens to people with no experience with mental health? [more inside]
posted by kanata on Aug 25, 2013 - 15 answers

Please, turn it off.

I have an on-and-off relationship with even my favorite music. My occasional loathing and indifference coincide with illness, though they outlast it; they do not occur with other symptoms of depression, which I have enough practice recognizing in myself. Has anyone had similar experiences or read anything on this or a related topic? Writing out of curiosity, not for help. [more inside]
posted by mcoo on Aug 20, 2013 - 5 answers

Baa baa scapegoat boyfriend

I have a lot of crap going on in my life to be frustrated and angry about, but for some reason I keep focusing it all on my totally blameless boyfriend. How do I stop this madness? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 18, 2013 - 5 answers

In a state of utter confusion

My adult daughter was diagnosed very quickly by a psychiatrist with bi polar disorder. It isn't that I disagree, but unfortunately I'm concerned that she is showing signs of antisocial personality disorder....She cycles about every three months having at least 2-3 mini rage episodes a month. She told me today that she's scared because of thoughts she is having. She lives with me, as do her two amazing kids. Her ability to care for them on her own is out of the question in my opinion based on the fact that she has a pill addiction and has had 2 seizures over dosing. When things are bad she goes to the doctor, has good intentions, gets back on a "good" track when things are bad she is not capable of being a loving mother. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 31, 2013 - 11 answers

Any pointers on coping with a sick cat by myself?

I asked a question about my cat a few weeks ago - he was fine then, but then got sick very soon after. We have both been through the wringer, and I'm having a very hard time assessing how his recovery is going because I've just been so sad and upset and can't tell if I'm over- or under-reacting to every move of his. (I'll try to keep the details short inside.) [more inside]
posted by Neely O'Hara on Jul 28, 2013 - 18 answers

Woman Next Door Making Herself Throw Up Every Night

I'm up again listening to this poor woman torture herself, it's so loud. [more inside]
posted by OneHermit on Jul 17, 2013 - 58 answers

Help me cope with pain

I've been in pain every day for four years, despite physiotherapy and prescription pain medicine. How do I feel like it is worth keeping going? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 12, 2013 - 13 answers

Need advice on taking a long leave of absence from work

I need to ask my boss for around 6 months off from work to care for a sick family member. Help me figure out how to do it right. [more inside]
posted by miyabo on Jul 5, 2013 - 17 answers

How do healthy people feel in the morning?

I’m not sure what I should be expecting anymore. How I feel, energy-wise, especially in the morning, varies quite a bit depending on... well, so many factors I can't keep track of them all. I want to know what I should be aiming for as I work with my doctors (or, perhaps, hoping for at some indefinite point in the future if I can't influence it now). [more inside]
posted by mock muppet on Jun 28, 2013 - 32 answers

Should I divulge my psychiatric disorder when applying for a job?

I don't intend to volunteer this information but some job applications include mandatory questions specifically relating to 'disabilities', which include psychiatric disorders/mental illness. When a job application specifically asks, what's the best course of action? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 20, 2013 - 7 answers

I am bitter about "happy people". Why am I feeling this way?

Lately, I've realized that I'm increasingly bitter and even quite angry about people that appear too happy (think your average idealized personality on Facebook). [more inside]
posted by raintree on Jun 11, 2013 - 27 answers

Boyfriend's progressively disabling (terminal?) illness

My boyfriend has a progressively disabling illness -- a form of muscular dystrophy. He will lose the ability to walk and easily get out of bed, etc., in about 10-15 years. We've been together for five very happy years, but that said, we are young (early 20s) and don't have many responsibilities other than school. My friends really like him, and so does my family. We've been very open with one another and have great communication. However, my parents are adamant that I find somebody else due to his illness. They won't force me to break up with my boyfriend, because they know he's a fantastic person, but will continuously express discontent when I hang out with him. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 30, 2013 - 55 answers

I love you so much, and I want to never have your baby.

My boyfriend and I haven't been together for a very long time, but it has already started to feel very serious and I see the potential for a longterm future together. We are both extremely close with our families and I know that family life and children are a huge priority for both of us. We're on the same page there. However... By extraordinary coincidence we both suffer from the same rare, semi-inheritable disease. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 10, 2013 - 25 answers

Pre-marriage counseling is fine. But how committed is he?

It's been a few months after my fiance proposed and he made plans to move in with me and my 15-year-old son this summer. As predicted, my son began acting up, basically in the form of talking back and being a little rude to me in front of the fiance, who comes here every weekend. It's important to note my son does not act this way when it's the 2 of us and I completely understand what's going on and we're talking to someone. [more inside]
posted by kinetic on Apr 27, 2013 - 26 answers

Could my ADHD diagnosis be wrong? Or be expanded?

Hi. I'll try and cut a long story short, about 6 month ago I've been diagnosed with ADHD and now I'm doubting my diagnosis. (more down there, all sappy again) [more inside]
posted by ahtlast93 on Apr 16, 2013 - 12 answers

Barfing WTH!?

For the second time in less than a month I've had to go home sick from work because I was barfing uncontrollably--and then felt fine enough by evening to go for a run and eat a normal dinner. Is it something I ate? Food poisoning or allergy? The flu? WTH!? (Gross descriptions lurk within.) [more inside]
posted by silly me on Apr 7, 2013 - 27 answers

Advice for adult children of mentally-not-all-there parents?

How do balance respecting a parent's age and experience and treating them well when they aren't acting their age? Sorry for the length. I am not sure how to make it shorter. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 2, 2013 - 19 answers

Disclose health status?

Should I disclose my illness? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2013 - 28 answers

Family Drama -- Aunt revisited

I wrote this question about my Aunt. As it turned out, I just wrote back a very polite reply -- "thank you for your good wishes" ...I was polite. I felt good about this. Thank you for all the helpful answers. My Aunt wrote me again -- long story inside. Thank you for taking the time to read it. [more inside]
posted by Lescha on Mar 26, 2013 - 26 answers

Why is my body mad at me?

Last night I had an episode of intense tremors and nausea shortly (< 2 hours) after eating. This morning I feel fine. What gives? [more inside]
posted by fight or flight on Mar 26, 2013 - 12 answers

How can you learn to live well with chronic illness?

I have thyroid disease (hypothyroidism) and have been struggling for weeks as my body adjusts to a new medication. How can I keep my spirits up? [more inside]
posted by raintree on Mar 9, 2013 - 18 answers

How can I deal with this "time off" in my life?

Depression has upended my life and the people trying to help aren't really helping, what do I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 7, 2013 - 19 answers

Why do I still feel like crap 2 weeks later?

A little over two weeks ago, I came down with what I suspect was norovirus. While the nausea and worst of it is long past, I still feel crappy. Some icky details inside. [more inside]
posted by jrchaplin on Mar 4, 2013 - 14 answers

Help me sort out what I should say to my aunt -- family drama.

Background: When my father learned I was gay, he disowned me. Think radical old-world "you are dead to me." This was many years ago -- well over a decade. He was very serious and cut off all contact with me. Made it clear I was out of the will and all of that -- very dramatic. I did try to initiate contact a few times many years ago, but was rebuffed. This is not what my question is about though -- I am at peace with this. I know I am a worthwhile and lovable person and I have many people in my life who care about me/love me. I had therapy when all this happened and I really feel I dealt with the emotions then. I know I am lovable and valuable person. Also, my relatives on my late Mother's side -- who are also quite old-world -- surprised me with their acceptance... [more inside]
posted by Lescha on Feb 22, 2013 - 14 answers

How much harm can a past-it wholemeal tortilla wreak?

We have cooked a fab Indian meal for friends coming this evening. However, to our dismay the 'Discovery' brand wholemeal tortillas which we were going to use for rotis, turn out to be one month past their sell by date. They taste ok. Can anyone get sick from eating an out of date wholemeal tortilla? (Ingredients: Wholemeal wheat flour, water, veg oil, glycerine, raising agents (diphosphates, sodium bicarbonate), dextrose, salt, acidity regulators (malic acid, citric acid), preservative (calcium propionate), mono-anddiglycerides of fatty acids)
posted by Marzipan on Feb 11, 2013 - 28 answers

Brain Art Dance Thing Seeks Name

Help name this event: It's a day long event starting with an art show, leading into an evening of music and experiential art, and it's aim is to celebrate the creative works of those with mental illness. The higher goal is to destigmatize mental illness and educate attendees about the services available in the community. I like Revisionary Ball but someone else has claimed "Revisionary". Any ideas out there?
posted by Gusaroo on Feb 5, 2013 - 7 answers

Sick kitty, low on cash.

My cat is sick. I have next to no money. Is there a really-truly-worth it pet insurance company you recommend? Or is there a place I can apply for financial assistance? [more inside]
posted by greta simone on Jan 26, 2013 - 15 answers

How do I get over my narcissistic parent?

My mother is a narcissist and I need help getting over her; please read? [more inside]
posted by inaisa on Jan 17, 2013 - 24 answers

Weird dizzy spell - Should I do anything?

Just experienced a very weird dizzy spell...suddenly the room started spinning and I literally had to lay down on the floor of my office for about 10 minutes. [more inside]
posted by rainbowbrite on Jan 14, 2013 - 17 answers

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