Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with homeless

Cleaning Crew startup

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Thu, 21 Mar 2013 17:51:44 -0800

The homeless outreach program I work for wants to start a cleaning crew similar to Men in Blue run by The Doe Fund in New York and Philadelphia. I know so precious little about cleaning, let alone managing an entire cleaning crew. Any idea what equipment I'll need for a team of three to clean outside in the street? I imagine there'll be trash removal, mowing, and I'd like to include the actual cleaning of the pavement.

Why are there so many homeless people in the USA?

dreamsandhope — Sun, 03 Mar 2013 09:24:33 -0800

Please help my son (17 years) with a presentation about the homeless people in the US. We are from Scandinavia, and due to our welfare system, we don't have the same situation as in the US. We have explored several issues, and the more we search, the more questions we have. For example, in our country, if you lose your job, you will get 2/3 of of your salary from the govnt. (under a certain amount) till you find a new job, or if you become sick/have an accident, you will be on welfare, also receiving about 2/3 of your salary (also limited to a certain amount) somewhere between one - two years. It has to be said that the "certain amount" is quite good. You can live well - with compromises of course (depending of course what your salary was). After that, if you are not able to work, you would still have sufficient means to manage (though for many, it is difficult). This basically means that you will get help - and still be able to live where you live, or move to a cheaper place. Hospital is free here. So, the questions are...

Is it correct that the main reasons for becoming homeless are;

- losing your job, not being able to pay a mortgage/rent
- becoming sick/having an accident without health insurance
- mentally ill people
- drugs/alcohol

What have we missed? But what about social service in the states? Welfare? Is it a fact that if you get fired, and you don't have a salary coming in next month, then there is no unemployment aid?

Do you always have to have a health insurance? What about Obama's new health care bill? Does this help?

What can the homeless do to get help; food, shelter, financial aid, get back into "real life" again?

Thanks in advance!

Best organization for helping the mentally ill homeless in San Francisco

Afroblanco — Wed, 16 Jan 2013 14:09:02 -0800

I'd like to donate some money to an organization that helps mentally ill homeless people in San Francisco. Which organization would give me the most "bang for my buck"? I would rank my preferences in this order :

1) Efficient, well-run organization with the resources and experience to do the most good for the greatest number of homeless people
2) An organization that specifically helps homeless people in SF
3) An organization that specifically focuses on helping the mentally ill homeless

Also, given a set amount of money, which would make my money go further? One big donation to a single organization, or several smaller donations to a number of organizations?

I need a short term solution to homelessness of a four person family (2 adults, 2 children) in the Los Angeles area?

chasethecarrot — Mon, 05 Nov 2012 13:00:41 -0800

My family (self, fiance, and two children, ages 4 and 7) is currently homeless in Los Angeles. We are at a complete loss here... can anyone provide any insight, advice, anything at all to help us figure out what on earth to do? It's a looooong story, but to sum it up as much as possible, I was an independent student in my hometown (anytown, USA...somewhere in the Midwest..). I had a 4.0 GPA after earning my Associate's Degree, as well as several impressive accolades in regards to all of the community outreach I had done, scholarship foundations I founded, and student government positions I held (VP of the Honors Student Council, for instance). I discovered that I couldn't afford to continue my education at any of the local four-year universities, but as a community college student at that time, I couldn't complete my Bachelor's unless I transferred to a 4-year. So, on a tip from a friend at school, I started applying to some of the more prestigious schools all over the country, that would pay my full tuition if I could just be deemed worthy enough to be accepted.

I was endlessly thrilled when I received my acceptance packets, from Columbia in New York, and USC in L.A. Going to either one would mean moving across the country, but I didn't have a support system to speak of in my hometown anyway, and attending one of these far away schools was my only hope of achieving a Bachelor's Degree (and therefore, in my opinion, a better future for my children), so we decided to go for it. We moved to L.A. a little over a year ago....and we've been battling homelessness ever since.

The thing is that the cost of living out here is about four times what it was in my hometown- but minimum wage is the same. I honestly don't know how people without high paying careers are possibly affording this!! My goal, obviously, is to obtain my degree and THEN have a high enough paying career to be able to afford this cost of living... but I'm currently at a point where my entire college career is in jeopardy! My struggle with raising children and being homeless over the last year has led to being forced to withdraw from classes, and as a result I am now on academic and financial aid probation. If I don't solve my housing problem so I can start catching up on my schoolwork, I will be kicked out of college- permanently!!! I won't be able to return unless I can pay for it myself, which I simply cannot do... my inability to pay the state school's tuition in my hometown, even with the full aid of the Pell grant and student loans, was why I moved out here (for the full scholarships) in the first place... if I flunk out and am left with the "you can only come back if you can pay for it yourself" option, that will simply be the end of my college career. I can't stress the seriousness of that particular aspect of this whole nightmarish situation enough-- I'm about to lose my entire life's hopes and dreams... any hope of giving my children ANYTHING that they deserve in life!

I am disheartened, ashamed, miserable... I just don't know what to do anymore. I am currently waiting on a phone call in regards to a long term housing program that my family may be eligible for, in which case we may actually be housed sometime in the next month or two, which would obviously be WONDERFUL. However, even with that INCREDIBLE opportunity, that still leaves my family struggling to sleep and survive entirely in a very small car for, potentially, several more weeks (or even months). What we need is a short-term solution, or at least, that's how it appears. We should be able to solve our long term problem with this program that we are eligible for, but we are truly at the end of our rope with sleeping in our car... we really need some OTHER short-term solution until we get into permanent housing.

We have contacted EVERY shelter (that we've been able to find, anyway), and NONE of them have space for all four of us. So I am posting this question here to see if anyone out there has any ideas, anything at all. All I want to do is earn my degree and work my tail off so my kids can have the life I never had... but right now we're living in a tiny car and I feel like more of a failure as a parent than ever. Should I have just stayed and worked at McDonald's for the next fourteen years, until my kids were out of the house, before trying to earn a degree so I could give them a better life....??? I wouldn't have been able to give them a better life until after they were grown if I had done it that way... but they might not have had to live in a car for a period of time if I had done it that way.... I just don't know... :'(

So, again, I'm throwing this to my fellow MeFites in hopes of a better solution. If anyone has any questions, don't hesitate to ask-- our "story" is a veeeery long one, and I tried to keep this short (the kids are fighting and I have a very limited amount of time with internet access, so I always have to be as quick as I can!), so there are, inherently, endless amounts of details left out here, and I don't know which ones might be pertinent to certain people in order for them to provide some kind of advice or idea, so just don't hesitate to ask me anything; I'm happy to answer, especially if it helps me find some kind of solution to this terrifying situation! Either way I do thank you all for taking the time to read this and I wish you all a wonderful day.

P.S. It occurs to me that this detail is probably important- our family currently has about thirty dollars to our names, and my fiance and I are both looking for employment every day, although it is difficult without being able to keep ourselves cleaned up. However, we have put in about fifty resumes each (seriously!), but that has only yielded ONE interview so far, and the results of that interview have yet to be determined. Nothing else has looked at all promising so far, unfortunately, but we are trying our best.

I will leave it at that for now... Again, thank you all in advance for your time and energy here. We greatly appreciate it.

can people really live in storage lockers? because that's the only application i'll get accepted.

windykites — Fri, 21 Sep 2012 19:18:25 -0800

How can I find a place to rent when I'll almost definitely fail a rental application and I'm a terrible risk? I am unemployed. I have an overdrawn credit card and about three things in collections (each debt in collections is under $500). I will theoretically be employed by december. I will (sort of) have enough money to be able to pay first and last and another month on top of that. (If i pay rent and don't pay my collections debts); I am not going to default on my rent. I know this, but a landlord doesn't.

The only part of this that matters on a rental application is that the "employer" section of the application will be blank, and that my credit is... well, I always pay my phone bills and rent at least...

I can only find apartments in my price range in managed buildings. I highly doubt if I could handle living with roommates. (I am incredibly noise sensitive and normal human noises make me insane and prevent me from ever sleeping or even relaxing... it's part of why I need to leave this place). I have to be out of here by november 1 and staying is not an option. There is nobody who can cosign for me. So what, if anything, can I do? Do people actually get away with living in storage lockers?

How to expand my social good project?

covercash — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 10:00:27 -0800

I'm trying to feed a few homeless people with a little side project I started, any suggestions for getting more people to participate? In anticipation of reddit's Dedicated Day of Service, I came up with the idea of feeding homeless people in Philadelphia using Qdoba rewards points. This isn't a business, it's just a little real world hack of the Qdoba rewards system to hopefully do some good for a few people.

I "soft launched" to friends & family about a week ago and and we've already acquired 1300 points... but the goal is 100,000. If I'm going to hit that goal by Sept. 22 (reddit's DDoS), I'm going to need a lot more people using this shared rewards card.

Do you have any suggestions for getting the word out? I tried posting the project around reddit but I think it got caught in the spam filter.

Thanks!

Dallas TX, where to find homeless or hungry individuals?

jesirose — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 12:54:07 -0800

Where could I go in Dallas TX this weekend to hand out hot food (ie, not canned good, but food to eat right then) to around 10-20 homeless or hungry individuals?

What can I do for a homeless stranger?

strangepapernote — Tue, 17 Jul 2012 23:30:00 -0800

What can I do, if anything, for a homeless stranger who hasn't asked for help? Recently, a homeless woman (maybe in her thirties or forties) moved under an overpass near my apartment complex. All her belongings seem to be there with her: just a couple of bags and a sleeping bag. Over the past two weeks, I've seen her clothes get progressively dirtier and dirtier. She never asks for money or tries to talk to anyone. Usually I see her writing on a small notepad, or more recently, she's been ranting in an angry voice to herself, or perhaps some figure that I can't see. I'm usually rushing to work, but last time I heard something about not wanting to join a church society.

Is there anything I can do for this lady? I'm a bit worried because the temperature has been upwards of 90 degrees recently. At first I figured that if I ever passed by and she wasn't there that I'd leave some cash in an envelope on top of her stuff, but that's never happened. Also, is it safe to assume that she could get to a homeless shelter if she wished? I really have no idea what the right course of action here is.

Time to make some b-b-boundaries

camylanded — Mon, 02 Jul 2012 08:30:02 -0800

My boyfriend and I are helping out a homeless couple and a homeless single girl-- how do I set boundaries and time limits without seeming pushy? When is enough enough? How do I truly help them? Lots and lots of details inside. I’m in a bit of a sticky situation. I live with my boyfriend in a small 2 bedroom apartment—one room is ours and the other is an art room—a room that is helping make money by selling art (hence we need the space from a business standpoint). We’re both helpful people to anyone who needs help—we both believe that what “goes around comes around” and if we’re doing good things, those good things are coming back. So we do as much good as we can—perhaps him a little more than I.

But I wonder—when is enough?

Recently, my boyfriend brought a co-worker home from work. She had started working there a few days prior. She had called him in the middle of the night and told him she needed a ride. It turns out the guy she had been living with ditched her in the middle of the country and told her to not come back to his apartment. My boyfriend told her she could stay with us. She’s been super gracious/helpful and I’ve enjoyed her company… only now… she needs to get her stuff back from this guy’s apartment. We don’t have a lot of space. Also, her ex-boyfriend is calling her and telling her she needs to come get her 3-year-old son because he “doesn’t want to deal with him anymore”.

On top of it all, he had promised his friend weeks ago that him and his girlfriend could stay here for 2 weeks because they got kicked out of her parent’s house. We lived with him in the past and those “2 weeks” turned into a month—to nutshell a long story.

I tried having a conversation about setting boundaries with all of this going on last night and it went something like “Give him 2 weeks because I already promised that and give her 3 weeks to get an apartment”. He also told me that if I have a problem before that, I need to speak up and confront them about it because he’s perfectly fine with it.

So a few questions—first off, how do I handle confronting these people staying with us when I have an issue? I’m introverted so for me, it’s a lot to take in (not to mention I’m really bad with confrontation), even if we’re really helping these people out. Secondly, how do I set boundaries and help his co-worker out without being mean or making her feel like she’s putting us out? We don’t know her very well. I’m afraid this is going to turn into something long term because he doesn’t care to help out and I’m guilt tripped into accepting it. What now? Do I help them find apartments/manage money so that they don’t end up staying here longer or should I just kick them out after the allotted time and not care? I know he would accept it almost indefinitely. The co-worker has offered to help with rent. His friend however has not (and judging from the past living experience probably won’t).

Help me help them!

AmandaA — Tue, 12 Jun 2012 08:44:28 -0800

How can I help the homeless of Toronto? A homeless man had a medical emergency this morning as I walked in to work. He had a friend there helping him, and she asked me to call an ambulance, which I (obviously) did. This has shaken me very profoundly -- if I hadn't been there (more accurately, if someone with a cell phone hadn't been there. I did nothing but facilitate an ambulance arrival) this man could have died (although his friend was extremely calm, confident and competent).

I don't really have that much money, and I have less time, but I'd like to try to make sure homeless people have access to everything they need or have the option to get off the streets if that's what they want. What's the best way to do this? Give money directly to people on the street? Pass out survival kits as per an older Ask? Give to a charity? Donate to Streets to Homes?

I really have no clue how to go about this. Any suggestions are welcome. And although I take issue with religious organizations if they're the best option I can live with that (I would like to point out that this emergency happened a block and a half from the Scott Mission. Don't know what to make of that).

How to survive serious financial setback + eviction?

Anonymous — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 14:34:18 -0800

Due to the current recession I've been under-employed for far too long. Unfortunately it's turning out to be a catastrophically long time, and now I need to know what my options are. I've had a hard time in the last couple of years after being laid-off and thought I had it mostly under control with the little money I've earned doing temp and freelance work (and constantly searching for full time employment), and a little help from friends here and there. I've also severely curtailed my other expenses, but things snowballed out of control financially anyway. I'm now facing losing what little I still have, namely my apartment, and thinking about that makes me hyperventilate, so I'm trying to look forward instead. It's go-time, and I need to be prepared for what to expect.

I don't have a family to help me out, and I don't qualify for a bank loan. My "problem" is small, all things considered (<$2K), but that's little comfort... however, I know I'll eventually recover from all of this, basically as soon as I get a job. I suppose that's how it is for most people going through this -- the final blow isn't necessarily a huge, insurmountable challenge... it's just the final one in a series. I can't borrow money from a friend because my friends aren't rich and besides, owing friends money messes with my head and plunges me into depression, and I want to avoid any added stress right now. I can't bear the thought of dragging someone else down with all this. It's my problem, no one else's.

There are no unemployment or social welfare programs available to me, I've tried. Reasons given: I've had work too recently and am registered with several employment agencies that get me work sporadically, I have no dependent children, and I do not have a drug dependency or qualifying medical condition, so I'm considered able to earn my own way. The man at social services said that there's nothing holding me back, I get work regularly it seems, so hang in there, more work will come along, and I'll be fine. That wasn't as true as I was hoping it would be. Part of what's scaring me even worse is something I read on the blue recently, about how being poor creates more debt. I'm looking at only a $2K problem right now, but how will that balloon over the next __ months or so?

What I need to know is this: what happens next? I have a 14-day eviction notice (meaning they'll file that eviction in 14 days if the terms are not met) because I owe my landlord money, and they want the back rent, plus next month's rent on the first, no negotiating that, and if it doesn't happen I'm out. Realistically, earning that much money in that little time cannot happen. So it looks like I have at least two weeks to prepare for this, which I'm grateful for, and I've started getting things around so I can begin packing up my stuff. If they evict me, am I still responsible for the full lease I've just renewed two weeks ago, but hasn't actually begun yet? (I just renewed my lease after being offered that option because I'm a valued tenant!) But what should my next step be? I don't have a lot of friends, and living with them isn't an option. Are there places I can go that aren't scary shelters like I've seen on tv? I know the eviction process can take months, but I don't feel like I should just squat in my apartment because it's not right, and I can't afford to mix more guilt and bad feelings into this situation. It's humiliating enough as it is. It would feel like theft to stay and not pay, but staying and paying whatever I do earn means I won't have any money to my name when it comes time to be forced out, and I also don't want to be forced out. I'd like this transition to be as low-impact and non-humiliating as possible. I have a tiny bit of money in my account, another $100 coming because I got a little work this week, and no future work lined up, but since I'm temping and searching, I could possibly be working next week, which would mean more income. How to best spend any money I have once I've been told to leave? Hotels in my town are too expensive, and that amount of money is not enough to rent anything that I'm aware of, not even a room.

What happens in this situation? What do people do? Is there something I'm not thinking of? People recover from this kind of setback, don't they? Alternatively, if someone can think of a way to earn a couple grand in two weeks, I'm all ears. I am in Illinois, and my throwaway email is genuser55@gmail.com. Thank you.

You have a nice face

holdkris99 — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 08:11:01 -0800

Why am I such an easy mark? It's true, I am. Whether it is homeless, panhandlers, "hey man can I buy a cigarette from you" or what have you, I am an easy Mark. If I am with a group of people, I am always the person that gets asked first, sometimes the only person in a group that will be asked. I take public transport most places I go and as someone walks through sizing people up, they always ask me. It never fails.

This isn't a problem, if I have some change to spare or an extra smoke I don't mind giving. I spent time in a homeless shelter and though I was never in a position to beg (is that the right term, it has a negative connotation that I don't really like) so I have compassion for people in need. I have been told that it's because I make eye contact, and maybe that's true but a lot of times I will be reading or have head phones on and not be paying attention to those around me and I still get asked. I can not tell you how many times I have been on a train with 20 or so people and I am either the only one asked or one of the few.

Will knowing what I look like help? The most recent picture I have is from our wedding a couple of months ago: pictured are me (I'm the big guy, my wife, the officiant and our body guard.

My name is even Marc.

I'm about to become homeless in Los Angeles. Please help me.

Anonymous — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 07:21:18 -0800

I'm 24, female, college-educated, and I'm about to become homeless in Los Angeles. Please hope me. Anonymous because I'm so humiliated. I moved to the Los Angeles area in September to live with a friend. It turns out that this friend has serious mental health issues that I did not know about before moving in with him. He's threatened to kick me out pretty much every other week since I arrived for various perceived infractions, but at this point, it appears that I need to leave imminently, for his sake and for mine. It's not fair to either of us to deal with this kind of stress, and to be perfectly honest, I don't think I can handle it very much longer. It is absolutely exhausting, both mentally and emotionally, to cope with his angry outbursts. I have been leaving the house all day every day in an attempt to give him some space, but he waits for me to get home and then launches into a diatribe. The strange part is that sometimes he's incredibly solicitous and invites me to hang out in the living room or watch TV with him, as we used to do when we were friends. This unpredictability has been the worst part, probably because it is so very like my (dysfunctional) family of origin.

I'm originally from the Midwest, but I have nowhere to go there, either. My mother is an alcoholic and drug addict who was homeless herself until she moved in with her enabler boyfriend this fall. Like most addicts, she seems to be surrounded by an enormous vortex of drama, which I know I'd be sucked into as soon as I moved back. I have a sister in my hometown as well, but she lives with a boyfriend and they're really living paycheck-to-paycheck themselves. My dad lives out of the country. We haven't spoken very much over the past 12 years or so, but we've been emailing a bit recently. I don't think he knows just how desperate my situation is, and I don't believe he's able to help me.

My family history is full of instability, which I think is why the stress of this situation is getting to me so much. When my parents divorced, my mother began to drink heavily and use drugs, my father disappeared, we lost our house, our car, and almost everything we owned, I had zero adult supervision or guidance, and basically things were very difficult for a long time. All of this ridiculous behavior from my friend is bringing back memories of my mother at her very worst, which is unpleasant.

I wasn't planning to stay in Los Angeles permanently, but the longer I stayed here, the more convinced I became that my hometown is a pretty toxic environment for me. I want to build a real adult life for myself, and I don't see that it's possible there. Furthermore, I don't have a job anywhere to live there, either, and if I'm going to be homeless, I'd rather do it in Los Angeles, where I won't freeze to death.

I have made several pretty grave miscalculations which have put me in this position, and I acknowledge that I am at fault. First, I am six credits short of a BA - my mother ended up hospitalized for life-threatening complications of alcoholism during the second semester of my senior year, and the ensuing turmoil made it impossible for me to concentrate on my studies. I know this was a huge mistake. I've called the university and have a plan for finishing the degree, but obviously have more pressing concerns at this time. Second, since I did not plan to stay here in southern California permanently, I didn't start looking for work until November. Of course, nobody looks at resumes over the holidays, so things are just starting to pick up now. I've had one interview and have at least 40 other applications in, so I really feel that it's only a matter of time before something works out.

So, basically, I just need somewhere to stay for a few more weeks before I find a job. I'm thinking about finding a tent and camping in the Angeles National Forest. I'm not very big or imposing, so I'm very reluctant to sleep in a park or anything like that. I do not own a car. If I knew someone with a backyard or a couch, I'd sleep there, but I don't know anyone here except for my "friend." I am allowed to stay in the house until January 31.

I'm sorry this is so long, but obviously I'm experiencing a lot of anxiety about this situation. What should I do? How can I manage this crippling anxiety while I'm trying to figure things out? Right now, I can't sleep or eat (my typical response to stress, unfortunately).

Any advice at all is welcomed. If you'd like to email me, I can be reached at lahomelessthrowaway@gmail.com

Thank you so much.

Asking how to ask for help

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 21:52:06 -0800

What are some demands that can be made of a city (pop 250,000) that would immediately find benefit for 13 homeless people? Extra credit: Consider half these people probably need some mental help but would be pretty likely to refuse it. Our city's Occupy is being told to leave, and we're thinking we'll hold down the park until the city finds some housing for these people. Realizing we can't expect or demand the city builds houses for everyone, I thought I'd query the hive mind on other possible avenues of assistance.

What to do about the "Pro-Life Homeless"

hermitosis — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 13:10:20 -0800

Local pro-life organization is raising funds in a way that I think is intentionally misleading. Can I do anything? Should I do anything? A sidewalk vendor appeared in my Brooklyn neighborhood a while back. They started as just a book table, but have expanded and it's several tables set up lengthwise with junk spilling out everywhere: furniture, housewares, books, and other second-hand items, all sold "to benefit the homeless."

Only after they'd been there for many months did I realize that there was a little sign on the very end of one table stating that they were actually a pro-life organization. (Their website used to have more information about the "pro-life" aspects of their mission, but it seems to have been changed. Right now there's just a single mention offering aid to "expectant mothers.") Sometimes there's no signage whatsoever. Today there were just big paper signs that said "SALE FOR THE HOMELESS."

I disapprove of this sort of fundraising, specifically because they aren't up-front about who they are and what they're doing with the money. (I have the same beef with the Salvation Army bell ringers.) It irritates me to know that a lot of their money probably comes from people who would never knowingly give to any kind of pro-life organization. At one time I just resigned to leave them alone and hope they moved on to somewhere else, but it's been over a year and they've flourished, and they show no sign of being more forthright with customers about who they are and what they're doing. It's hard to ignore, I have to walk back and forth past their tables several times a day.

Also, this is circumstantial, but around the time they started up, someone began wheatpasting anti-abortion propaganda fliers all over the neighborhood, written in both English and Polish. Stuff like "Diary of an Unborn Child" or vile descriptions of abortion procedures, often posted at children's eye-level. These have been replenished just about as rapidly as they've been defaced or removed by others in the neighborhood.

So, if I were going to complain about them, who would I complain to? My city councilperson? They must have a permit for the table or they'd have been shut down long ago, but they do seem to have let things get out of hand.

Or is this a situation where I should really just hold my tongue and chalk it up to cultural differences with people in my neighborhood? I'd like to hear some opinions.

Helping feed the homeless with just a little bit of time and cash and creativity

HeyAllie — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 12:05:24 -0800

Other than chili and spaghetti, what can I make in mass quantity that requires not much $$$, time or ingredients? If it's warm food, how do I keep it warm when it won't be served for at least another 90 minutes in an open parking lot, at night, where there is no electricity and it's freezing cold? Yes, it's to feed the homeless. Last night I volunteered for the first time to help feed the homeless in a nearby city. It was an amazing experience I'd like to do again. Because it was a spur of the moment decision and I live an hour away, I decided to just bring butter and rolls this time. Other volunteers brought rice, chicken stew, and fruit cocktail, but next time, I'd like to bring something a bit heartier, and with winter coming on, a dish that would be served hot would probably be very welcome.

A little more info: there is a sort of ragtag group of volunteers who come down on their own almost every night to a parking lot which is surrounded by homeless shelters around 7 pm. Apparently, one couple tries to make a hot main dish (using some food donated by restaurants and shops), while other volunteers usually bring sides (pasta dishes, for example) that supplement the main dish. The deal is that you make or buy the food and serve it yourself. Sometimes there is just that couple, but sometimes there are 4, 5 or 10 other volunteers who come and help out. Since this is not an organized nonprofit, just real people helping others out, they never know how much food or volunteers arrive every night.

Sometimes there are 100 people to feed, sometimes there are hundreds of people waiting for the food.

Since I live an hour away, I would love your ideas on something I can easily make in advance. Keep in mind the following caveats:

1) I'm not a great cook - 5 ingredients or less would be great.
2) I'd like to keep my budget around $20-$30 for each time I do this. I could spend more $$$, but would be able to do it less often.
3) Chile and spaghetti are often served, so I'm trying to think of other options to mix it up a bit.
4) It's got to be a dish I can easily and quickly ladle out into a small cup or bowl.

Also, any tricks to keeping the dishes warm if all I've got is a cooler to store them in during the drive over and the setting up? There is no electricity set up so I can't plug in a crock pot or anything like that to keep it warm.

Creating a feeding scheme for those in need

heartofglass — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 12:57:00 -0800

Need help to think about the details of a feeding scheme for homeless and people in need in my neighbourhood. I live close to a very wealthy neighbourhood in Brazil and would like to create a scheme to collect surplus food that restaurants and bars so I can create a feeding scheme for homeless people.

Initially I am thinking of doing this once a week and also use the scheme to collect clothes, shoes, toys and personal hygiene items that can be distributed as well.

I am writing a plan so I am thinking about the details. I don't own a car so I would need to recruit a volunteer that would be willing to fetch the food from the establishments for a start. Then I would need a place to assemble the meals and someone to donate containers...as well as people to help serve and distribute the whole thing, etc...

It would be great if anyone could share experiences around similar projects, things I should do, things be aware of and so on. Thank you so much!

Also, I'm not sure why it's socks in particular

foursentences — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 16:50:53 -0800

What is the business model of people who sell socks at intersections? In Chicago, at every third or fourth red light, someone will try to sell you plain white men's socks through your car window.

But how could this possibly be more profitable than begging?
- While I've sat in traffic over the years, I've watched these vendors ply their socks for maybe 2 hours total. In all that time I've never seen a single successful sale. (Which makes sense -- I can't imagine buying socks in that way, except perhaps moments after I'd stepped in a puddle.)
- Suppose that you sold one pack of socks every 3 hours. You could get, what, $4 or $5 for them? Even assuming that the socks are stolen, so that that $4.50 is pure profit -- and even ignoring the risk you take by stealing in the first place -- surely you can make more than $12/day begging at a busy intersection in a big city? (I know that the profitability of begging is a contentious topic, but Straight Dope suggests that my suspicion here is correct.)
- And I don't think that sockmongering simply *supplements* the income of a beggar, since I've also never seen anyone donate to these people.

Because I can't see how this could be more profitable than just begging, I've begun to speculate about other explanations.
- Are the vendors really selling drugs or pot, hidden in the socks?
- Is there some kind of workfare-style charity in place, that is willing to pay these people so long as they're at least making an effort to support themselves?
- Maybe established beggars are more willing to permit sock-hawking, which they don't view as competition, than they'd be willing to permit newcomers' begging in their territory?
- Maybe some religion proscribes begging?
- Maybe the dignity of calling yourself a salesman, instead of a beggar, is worth giving up (a large proportion of your) profits?

Any insights? Maybe some of my estimates are incorrect? Is there some other explanation here that's not occurring to me?

(I know that homelessness and begging can be politically-contentious topics. Please try to keep political axe-grinding -- in either direction -- out of what is meant to be a descriptive question about an improbable business model.)

Does anyone know of any great NYC programs to get gifted homeless people back on their feet?

StUdIoGeEk — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 10:41:25 -0800

Does anyone know of any great NYC programs to help get gifted homeless people back on their feet? I know two exceptionally AWESOME, intelligent, talented, (now) homeless people. I want to help but don't know how. I feel the need to put some energy into helping them fix this problem regularly, till it's sorted out. Does anyone know of any great NYC programs to get gifted homeless people back on their feet? I know two exceptionally AWESOME, intelligent, talented, homeless people who happen to be brother and sister (but are not "hanging" together). They both are exceptional people that lost their living spaces and/or jobs and had no backup. In NYC this can go down FAST. I want to help but don't know how. I give them cash (when i can) and they both use it wisely but I feel like I have done nothing when I walk away and know they don't have a solid place to stay. I feel like I NEED to put some energy into helping them fix this daily as I have a base to work from and the web etc. and they don't (and i know they could be really sucessful again with a bit of a hand).. I would even consider trying to assist them in relocating if the opportunity was good enough. They are both quite employable but with no recent work history. The girl is an Ivy League grad that is great with nutrition and health, the guy can build pretty much anything with his hands. Work/shelter situation would be the best I would guess. These are clearly people that would be temporarily crashing with their parents if they were still alive.
Any Ideas Hive Mind?

Friend having relationships with homeless clients.

Anonymous — Sun, 04 Sep 2011 12:35:45 -0800

My friend works with the homeless and keeps having relationships with her clients. What can I do, or should I not do? My friend of many years works re-housing homeless people, and often works with single guys.

She had a relationship with one of them earlier this year when she had just closed the case. I didn't think it was that cool, but tried to refrain from judging. I met him, he was nice, and they did seem into each other. However, he was still involved (more or less by proxy only) in crime and the drug scene, and I worried a lot for them both and their safety. They broke up after a few months - I don't think he was right for her but he also was pretty heavily dependent on her - as you might expect as she was the first person to show him love since he'd been in prison. It left him really down and he threatened suicide, although I think that was a heat of the moment type thing.

Anyway, I thought that would be the end of it and she'd be well warned off client relationships, but a month later and she's in another one, this time with a client who she is still supposed to be supporting professionally. This one also has kids, from a previous relationship.

The thing is, I've watched her struggle with various destructive tendencies before - drink, drugs, promiscuity (as well as dabbled in them myself so I'm not some sort of paragon, but she tends to go further than me by quite some way). I tend to try and have a word if she asks for my opinion, but mostly stand back and try to be there for her when she needs help pulling herself back together again. I love her dearly and we've both supported each other a lot with all kinds of things over the years.

However, this time she's involving other people in her shit. Vulnerable people, who don't need the added complication of a relationship with someone who seems destined to enjoy it for a while then move on. I feel like she's taking advantage of the fact that they are in thrall to her, and using them for their affection, not to mention getting a thrill from the taboo of seeing a client.

So first of all - tell me if I need to chill out and let her get on with it. I do worry about her too much sometimes. I may just be projecting my own shit onto her relationships. Maybe this is just like any relationship, the statistics say it will probably fail, but it's worth a chance.

If not though... how do I talk to her about what she's doing? To herself, and to her clients?

Sorry for length, and thanks to any who took the time to read this far.

Oh no, I see a darkness. Oh no, I see a darkness. Oh no, I see a darkness.

Autumn — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 06:41:36 -0800

The parents kicked me out for being gay. What can I do now to make sure I stay emotionally healthy, and how do I deal with my complicated feelings surrounding this? Has anyone else been through this? By "the parents" I mean Mom and her boyfriend. Bio Dad has been quite supportive and is the main reason I'm not on the streets right now; I can't stay with him but I'm using the money he gave me to stay in a hotel until I find a roommate or an apartment. I'm 21. I came out in June. This happened around a week ago.

I went out to see my girlfriend and my parents tried to follow me around to find her (we'd stopped meeting at the house at their request) and talk to her. This hasn't gone well in the past and usually consisted of BF telling her he'd call the police on her, etc.

I went back to the house so I wouldn't lead them to her, and Mom said she just wanted to have a civil talk. Just her, because of BF's actions last time. We agreed, were having the talk, which was about how my seeing a woman was causing problems between her and BF.

Then BF rolls up some ten minutes later. That's when things got bad. He basically told the girlfriend that she couldn't offer me anything other than sex, called her a bulldyke, said our relationship didn't mean anything, etc etc. Then they both threatened to call the police to get her information, and drive up to her house and out her to her Mom. When GF said the police wouldn't give out that information, BF said that money talks and insinuated that he'd hired a private investigator. Then they started trying to accuse me of sleeping around, cycling through people, etc. Basically trying to tell my girlfriend that I wasn't really serious about her.

Sometime in that conversation they told me that if I chose to stay with her the door would be locked and they wouldn't let me back in. BF doesn't want homosexuals on his property, and Mom wanted me out because of the problems I was causing between them.

GF started to cry as they were driving way, so I wrapped my arms around her. They had to drive past us to get out of the complex so when they passed us hugging BF yelled out the window "That's sick!"

The thing that gets to me about this is that Mom didn't seem to care much about me seeing a woman. She'd be fine, then he would say something to her and THEN she would get upset with me. She told me that he would get angry with her for being unable to "control" the situation, and wasn't happy with her parenting style. She said that he went from wanting to marry her to wanting her to move out, would complain to her every day for hours, etc and that she was stressed out and that things didn't feel like "home" anymore. The night before this happened she told me she was moving out because since he wasn't going to change and I wasn't going to change, that was the only option. I felt really guilty at the time because I felt like it was my fault, but after all this I just don't know how to feel.

I feel like she picked him over me. Their relationship has lasted six years or so, but still, I'm her kid. I can understand that she felt torn, but, I dunno. Before this incident I was angry with him for blaming things on her, but now it's like... I never blamed her for his actions, so why am I the one who gets the short end of the stick?

I grew up thinking she didn't love me because of certain things that happened, but in the past few years I started to think, "Well, she does love me, she just doesn't know how to show it and the things she says when she's upset are just words." But now I feel like this is just "proof" that she really doesn't love me, and it really hurts. She had no idea that Dad had given me a substantial amount of money the last time this happened (no arguing, they just locked the door when I came back and wouldn't let me back in. I was on the streets for a few hours, called up Dad to take me to get my stuff, but Mom said she wanted to work things out and so I moved back in) so as far as she knew I'd have to be on the streets.

She has texted me and called me about "working things out," but I know that BF's feelings haven't changed so I haven't responded. I haven't spoken to her because what happened really, really hurts. I don't want her to think everything is OK. I know she does care, in a way, or she wouldn't be texting me. At the same time, she basically stood there and let BF call my girlfriend a bulldyke, say we were sick, and laughed along with him. (she's said similar things but hasn't in a few months), so it's like... why is she now like "how were classes today?"

I'm not trying to say she's all bad, because I know she's human and feels torn between her child and her BF. And maybe I shouldn't feel entitled because I'm her child, I don't know. I know she's probably upset over the situation too. My Dad suggested to me awhile ago that I start lying about who I was going out with, or just not tell them at all (I always tell them with who, where, and when/if I'll be back). It seems like Mom would have preferred I lie to BF (I suspect she was lying about it since I didn't have any problems with him for about a month, then he saw her picking me up one day andyeah.) So, to be fair, I could have tried harder to keep BF oblivious. I didn't know the problems between them had gotten that bad until the night before the incident, when Mom told me.

I'm prone to depression and I know that if I don't head this off I could get into a really dark place emotionally. I was quite happy before all this happened and I just want to be OK. I'm not really close to any of my family and I feel like I just don't have one. I mean, Mom's are supposed to love you no matter what, right? But BF basically asked her to choose between me and him and she picked him. That really, really hurts.

I know exercise and eating right helps, but... how do I process this? I can't afford a therapist right now. I've been OK at times and at times I just get randomly down and snippy with GF. I just got out of a major depression not too long ago, was learning that life is about perception, etc. Heck, my last journal entry before this happened was about how happy I was. But now I just feel sad a lot of the time again, and GF is generally a happy and chipper person, and I feel upset with myself that I can't get back to that place. I can't tell you how long it took me to get out of pessimistic mood and generally be an optimistic person. It was a lot of hard work and I feel like this incident just undid that.

I realize I'll be upset for a bit but I don't want it to change me and put me in some dark place again. What can I do to stay positive?

Help me live well in a van.

Lutoslawski — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 13:01:37 -0800

I'm going to be moving into a van for awhile. What should I expect and what are some things I can do to make it as comfortable as possible? Due to some strange circumstances, I'm moving into a van. It's a 1971 Dodge and it is equipped with a small kitchen, toilet and a shower as well as a bed and small couch type thing.

Because of the propane involved and the emptying of septic tanks, I'm going to try to use the amenities as little as possible in the actual van. I'll probably do most of my showering at work and try to eat things that don't require much cooking, etc. It will be parked in a driveway of a friend's house, though I won't really be able to use the house much.

Have you ever lived in a van? Do you have advice or suggestions on how to make it as livable as possible?

What is the best way to keep it cool in the summer months without running the van's AC?

What can I do with little or no electricity? Get a headlamp for reading?

What (good) foods can I keep in the van and eat that don't require much cooking or refrigeration?

Anything I'm not thinking off?

I will try to answer any questions that arise. Thanks everyone!

Congratulations! You Get to Start from Scratch!

vivid postcard — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 19:19:28 -0800

In continuation of this question, what resources can I forward to my family member, now that he is off the streets? Check out the other question if you want some background info, but long story short: I have a family member who became homeless at the start of the year. While he was given some assistance by family members who live in his state*, and spent some time going in and out of their guest rooms (and sometimes in and out of shelters), he spent the last six months living out of his car and trying to fend off total disaster.

Good news is that he's been employed for a couple of months now and has moved into an apartment. Thank god.

Bad news is that he has obviously been affected by the ordeal. We were having a conversation on the phone, and it is quite apparent to me that this has been a trauma to him (of course it has!). He talks about how he feels shell-shocked, overwhelmingly angry, unsure of what to do. I told him that all these reactions were understandable, given his situation, and encouraged him to see a therapist when it will be possible (probably not until his health insurance kicks in).

In the meantime, what resources could I forward to him? Websites? Books? This thread has the exact theme I would like to guide your thinking, but I am looking for non-fiction, therapeutic books. This thread had some resources, but I am not sure if only sending him PTSD literature would be helpful, as I am not a therapist, and I don't know what would be the best read for his situation. Also, while my first impulse is to get him a book, he would probably be more likely to sit down and read a information on a website, so any good online sources might be more useful to him.

Obviously, books on recovering from homelessness would be ideal, but any other readings/ideas that you think would be appropriate would be helpful, as well.

* Much of the familial help that I was hoping he was getting was disjointed, at best, or neglectful, at worst. And those who wanted to do the most for him were either across the country or in another country all together, which hindered a lot of our efforts. I think the (perceived, or not) lack of support this is contributing to his feelings, so it may be something your suggestions might possibly consider.

CMS for Homeless Services Directory

The White Hat — Mon, 09 May 2011 06:51:52 -0800

I want to create a Yelp-like, community-editable local search directory of resources available to the poor and homeless in my city. What CMS do I use? This directory would help clinicians and social workers refer patients to appropriate services by answering questions like "What is the closest free HIV testing center near location X that is open Tuesdays at 6PM and has Spanish-speaking staff?" Ideally, the UI would be simple enough for nonprofessionals to use it as well.

I think that the database is simple enough (location, contact, hours of operation, services offered, scheduling method, &c), but I'm stuck on finding a good CMS for such data that:

is community editable

can use the google maps API (or any other map service that does public transit routing)

is navigable by smartphone

has some form of comments/ratings system

The only recommendation I've had so far is tWiki, which supports structured data but looks like it would be a bear to optimize for local search. I'm more of an IT hobbyist than a professional, so out-of-the-box software appeals to me. Is there anything out there that fits this bill and doesn't break the bank?

Items to give to area homeless people

DizzyLeaf — Thu, 05 May 2011 14:44:20 -0800

Help me come up with ideas for items that would be needed by the homeless. I see many homeless people on my commute to and from work, usually at stoplights. I never carry cash on me, but would like to keep things in my car that I can give out. I was thinking about putting the items in bags & handing them out instead of cash. I have a few ideas like bottled water, toothbrush & paste, combs, deodorant, & maybe a box of snack bars. Any items would have to be kept in my car & not spoil. Can you think of any others? Or can you think of any reason why this isn't a good idea? Thanks in advance!