Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with health and psychology

What was this reluctance to drop a deuce?

Anonymous — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 09:12:19 -0800

What was this reluctance to drop a deuce? As a child I experienced a lot of trauma - dad beating up mom, and lots of screaming matches/broken furniture between my parents. I was never physically or emotionally abused by either of them. I had a habit up to about the age of 9 where I would hold back bowel movements as long as I possibly could, for days or maybe over a week. It would get to the point where everything would get compacted and would hurt like hell when I finally did go, and I would experience some light bleeding - I assume due to tissue tearing from trying to pass a boulder. I remember kneeling down on my heel to keep it in, and I remember it feeling very unpleasant. But I do remember being aware that I should just go sit on the toilet and let it out, I just didn't *want* to. I was properly toilet trained, so it's not like I didn't know what I was supposed to do, I just chose to hold it in. I was scared that it would hurt or kill me, but I kept doing it. I am 40 now and everything is normal, I go when I need to and have no bowel/gut dysfunction at all. I think it stopped when I was around 12 but don't remember what made me stop.

Now that I've been through a ton of therapy, I wonder why I did this. I assume it was due to the insanity I was dealing with, but I don't understand *why*. A means to have control over my body when nothing else was in control? A way of expressing the emotional pain physically like 'cutters' do? Is this a known phenomenon? I'm a guy, if that makes any difference.

Should I postpone the sleep I haven't had in days to stay alert today?

doublehappy — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 10:32:20 -0800

I haven't slept in days, and I need to be completely alert for the next sixteen hours. Should I nap or push through? It's 5:19am Monday here, and I don't know what the hell's going on, but I woke up 7:30am Friday, so it's been a while since I slept. I'm just starting to feel tired - i.e. I wouldn't find it difficult to close my eyes and nap or sleep now.

I have two smallish but important code modules due today and tomorrow, and I need to be alert. I have a game of indoor football at 2pm, and I really don't want to be collapsing at half time from sleep deprivation. I'm also taking French some evenings and have my final test of the course at 6pm.

What should I do? Will a quick nap now leave me worse off in the short term? Is there some sort of over-the-counter-medicine-hack that I could use like, I don't know, mixing paracetamol with honey or something?

I'm going to have to be at work in 3 hours regardless, so my nap can only be 2.5 hours minus Metafilter advice time.

How do I get my body to calm down?

Anonymous — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 12:12:55 -0800

How do I begin to deal with what appears to be generalized anxiety disorder? I am wondering about experiences with anxiety medication... Help me fix my whacked out body! In the last year, my stress has gone from just being stress to anxiety of varying magnitudes. I'm looking to deal with this, and I'm beginning to wonder if medication is the way I need to go. I need some advice from those who've taken medication for anxiety or know those who have.

This probably deserves a little back story. I'm youngish (roundabout college age), and my teenage years were spent in turmoil because of my family. It may be worth mentioning that one of my parents is severely mentally ill (read: craaazy). While logically I've dealt with a lot of what it meant to be a child amid that--and yes, been to therapy--I went from that stress, to the stress of college and living on my own, to the positive but nonetheless stressful event of meeting and marrying a wonderful guy.

I kind of feel like I haven't had emotional rest in a long time, if really ever. This has all added up to the point that I can't rest now that most things are going well and right. (And yes, I try to meditate, but to little to no avail.) It's very frustrating, indeed.

In the last six months to year, I have had issues with sleeping (going to sleep, but no problems once I'm asleep), having my mild skin disorder rev up a bit (it's stress-related), and have begun to exhibit physical signs of an anxiety disorder.

That's probably what is most annoying. My head is mostly clear and logical. I do not have many irrational thoughts, and those I do have I can usually talk myself though, like most people. It's just my body gets keyed up over everything now, it seems. I am in my final year, and on my way to classes, I begin to get jittery, for instance, and my stomach turns to knots. Sometimes in class, I feel myself shaking a little and sweatier than usual. On other occasions, I have been walking down the road, fine and dandy, and then suddenly I get all this muscle tension and this "heavy" emotional feeling. Out of nowhere. There is absolutely no reason for this. I am not mentally nervous about going to the classes, meeting people, etc. My body just behaves this way, as far as I can tell.

Clearly, though, it is anxiety, just because of the way it makes me feel; it's like stress 2.0. About the only time I'm not getting all keyed up is when I'm with friends or my partner. At least that's good! My body seems to go nuts when I'm out on my own, so maybe I've got strange emotional issues surrounding that, but I really don't know what they'd be. I'm pretty ballsy and confident, even despite my body's funniness, so the reactionary anxiety symptoms are really bizarre.

Given this, should I take medication (or possibly Kava?) to get me over the hump? I get the impression that my body just needs to be trained to relax a bit, to sit down and STFU, if you will, and then it'll be able to do that. I would go back to CBT, but I don't really know what I'd talk about week in, week out, and I don't have that money or time to blow, anyway.

I know you are not my doctor, but I ask here, because I feel doctors and psychiatrists are pretty shit at honestly and realistically expressing the side effects--both positive and negative--of taking certain meds. I'd also like to know which meds you or your loved ones have had good/bad experiences with, so I will have something to go in with if/when I do see my doctor. Also, see my GP or look for a psychiatrist? My insurance is crap, so I will pay either way probably.

A throw-away account: fixmeplzkthx@gmail.com.

How do I not pass on my shyness to my son?

wheat — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 06:50:20 -0800

[NewDadFilter:] I'm a shy person and a new dad. Is there anything I can do to keep from transmitting that trait to my kiddo? I've had a lot of trouble with shyness, and I'd prefer for my son not to have the same trouble. I remember my parents and other relatives commenting on my shyness, so, of course, I never do that. I'm actually quite capable of interacting with others in certain contexts (teaching, playing music live). But other really simple interactions are often very difficult for me (e.g. interacting with waiters, for some reason, induces a lot of anxiety). But, in most social situations involving new people, I tend to be quiet at first, and only gradually warm up and engage others in conversation. I'm quite talkative among people I know well.

I found a lot of good advice in this thread about strategies an adult might take to deal with the issue, and that's helpful, but I'm coming at this from a different angle (I think).

My son turned one year old in January. He seems to have some of my same temperament. In social situations, he tends to survey the scene before jumping in. He doesn't strike me as overly shy, I just want to do what I can to make sure that he doesn't become that way.

I say he's crazy; therefore, he must go through an evaluation.

metalheart — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 09:37:51 -0800

Australian (and U.S.) Mental Health/Legal Filter. Can you just go and talk your GP into having someone put through a psychiatric evaluation? One of my close friends is studying medicine here in Melbourne, Australia, and in one of his various internships, a psychiatrist told him that anyone can recommend someone get a psychiatric evaluation, through their GP. In other words, if you wanted to, you could go through the process against another person, like so:

Go to your local GP. Talk to him about the person you consider to be mentally ill, and, if the GP agrees with you that this sounds like a mental illness that could cause harm to that person or those around him, that person must, by law, go through a psychiatric evaluation.

Psychiatrist telling him this or not, I call bullshit on it--at least some of it. It seems like, surely, there must be some evidence (other than words/hearsay) that a random individual has to provide for a GP to sign this off. Moreover, it would seem the GP would actually have to see said mentally ill individual, not just hear what some other person has to say about him.

If not, I can very easily imagine people doing this just to disturb someone they don't like/broke up with/fired, etc. It seems too easy: pick a mental illness, go speak with a GP, get him to agree with you, and in no time at all, the person you're saying is mentally ill has to go in for an evaluation. Talk about stressing someone out, if you're lying!

Is this true? If so, under what law? I've not been able to find it through searching. I'm looking for laws and policies, if possible, though anecdotal evidence is okay, too.

Extra Question: I know a bit about involuntary commitment and the like under U.S. law, and I know that a doctor himself can recommend involuntary commitment for one of his own patients that he deems a danger to himself or others, but is there anything similar to the above?

If these laws do exist in either or both countries, what provisions are there to protect individuals from being evaluated wrongfully? I.e., suing doctors and the like.

Can you become ill by studying illness?

psyward — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 20:29:08 -0800

Is it possible to develop mental illnesses by studying psychology? I've heard occourances of this through various sources over the years, but i'm looking for definitive proof (i.e. reports, studies)

Resources for those close to people with PTSD?

Anonymous — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 14:08:27 -0800

Good literature and resources for learning to help and support someone with PTSD? Someone I care about has been diagnosed with PTSD, a result of the abuse they endured in childhood. This person is receiving professional help, but as a close friend I'd like to learn about how to best offer them care, support and understanding during their therapy and healing. I'm not asking for direct advice about that here. Instead I'm hoping to be directed to useful resources for the inexperienced.

I'm not at all qualified in mental heath care or psychology. From what I've read so far, PTSD seems a complicated and difficult condition. I'd be very grateful for pointers and links to good articles, books, websites or other resources, so I can learn more. There's a lot on the web, but I feel poorly qualified to judge the value of much of it.

Resources oriented to those caring for people with PTSD would be especially appreciated, but anything enlightening from reputable sources will be very welcome. Thanks very much.

Seeking advice on choosing (or not choose) between a therapist and a psychiatrist.

Soulbee — Sat, 15 Sep 2007 10:24:09 -0800

I need help deciding whether to continue seeing my psychologist (who i really like) and see a psychiatrist (who I also really like) for med management, or see the psychiatrist for both therapy and med management? Also, does anyone have experience with Harvard Pilgrim HMO's mental health benefits? See several of my recent questions for details but basically last month my boyfriend killed himself in a very shocking way. I was already in need of mental health care, and since then have been receiving it from a psychologist with GP doing med management since the event. However, my medication needs are complex to begin with, and complexified further by the tragedy and trauma of the recent event. I need a psychiatrist and was unable to get an appointment with one until today (nearly five weeks post crisis!). The appointment went well, i thought. this doctor was worth waiting for.

I think my psychologist is great and he's been a great help, and we've recently started discussing and working on the issues that had caused me to think about getting help in the first place, before the death. it's going well and i know i could make progress with him. but i definintely need a psychiatrist and i've found a good one that i clearly connect with, who I can tell would be also very suitable for my needs and a good match in general. he doesn't want to be just a med management doc (he typically provides therapy in addition to med mgmt) but1) said he would do that for me long term if i wanted to continue seeing my therapist and 2) is not pressing me to make any decisions quickly/now about transitioning all my care to him instead of seeing both him and my therapist. However, I can immediately see the benefit in doing just that for a number of reasons -- insurance, financial, simplicity, geography, time management.

But. I'm uncertain and maybe reluctant. I know i'm feeling very attached to my therapist because he was there "at the beginning" and we've started to make real progress, thus a general reluctance to make the switch. no one's forcing me to decide immediately, and i have appointments scheduled this coming week with each. Is there any genuine benefit to continuing to see 2 professionals instead of transitioning all my care to one whom I do feel is very competent to meet all my needs? I'm in stabile but not great mode right now; I don't think I'm at risk for dramatically destabilizing if I were to make a change. But i do feel that it would in some ways be starting over to switch all my care to one, new, person.

I've been in and out of therapy, and on and off of meds, all my life and I've never commited to the process. I really want to do things right this time; one of the last things my boyfriend said to me was that he wanted me to be happy. I've been given the chance to work towards that. Any general words of advice? Comments questions and concerns? Thanks for reading.

I think I have ADHD

blueplasticfish — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 13:05:43 -0800

Ok, so I am now willing to admit I may have ADHD, but I have no health insurance. Now what? Most of my life I have had teachers, friends, relatives tell me or my parents that I have ADHD. While I denied this for the longest time, I am beginning to recognize this may be the source to some of my problems at work and school.

I've read two books about the disorder and I certainly illicit many (if not all) of the symptoms.

I am two months behind on a project at work because there are days I just sit and browse random things on the internet all day long. I am not doing as good as I feel I could at school because I procrastinate, don't attend class as I should, and can't force myself to get into the material.

I have never been professionally evaluated. My parents turned down request by my doctors and teachers when I was young to be evaluated for ADHD. The thing is, I don't have health insurance, and I cannot really afford to pay for a doctor or any prescription they might give me.

What can I do? Would paying the $150+ for a doctors consult be worth it? Am I just being paranoid? Are there any "home remedies"? I have read a book called "Healing ADD" and it had some good recommendations, but I have trouble implementing the behavioral changes it asks for.

Thanks for the help.

Mean green

Anonymous — Wed, 31 Jan 2007 11:32:43 -0800

I think that marijuana may be giving me headaches, but I'm really not sure. My health history: I never get headaches. I never take any type of medication (Tylenol, Advil, etc.), and I am a vegetarian. I also smoke a lot of marijuana.

I've been using, daily, for maybe 4 or 5 months, and it has never interfered with my life negatively, and in fact has been more of a boon than anything, especially in the creative work that I do (we're talking maybe one joint or less per day).

However...

I started getting headaches about two weeks ago, and they have been prolonged, lasting two, three and four days at a time. Now, I feel like I have intermittent headaches throughout the day, with some lasting for the duration of the day. I tried to connect the headaches to something--change in diet, stress, environment--but was unable to detect anything in particular that had changed. Everything has been steady, for months. Sometimes they disappear for a day, only to return the next.

I have no reason to suspect that my marijuana use is causing these headaches--which are more dull, foggy aches rather than full-blown throbbing migranes--but I have to ask myself, is it a factor?

Everyone I know who uses marijuana at the same frequency as me has said that they have never experienced this kind of side-effect.

So, could it be the marijuana? Anecdotal answers are fine, and so are more scientific answers. Also, natural headache remedies would be welcome, too :)

I'll add one other bit here: about one week ago I found out that I have a small cavity, though my teeth are giving me hardly any pain or discomfort at all, and I hardly notice it. I'm having the cavity filled next week. I suppose it could be that, but something seems to indicate otherwise.

Psych Counseling for uninsured?

andrewyakovlev — Wed, 06 Dec 2006 10:21:24 -0800

I'm trying to help out a friend /wout health insurance who needs some psych counceling in NYC. I remember hearing about something attached to a college, where it was $25 or $50 an hour. Any info?

Depressed about career choices

Anonymous — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 07:29:29 -0800

Depressed about career choices. I don't want to post this under my real name. Basically, I am worried that I am making a huge mistake with my life.

I'm pursuing work I hope I'll love in the field of mental health. But I am someone who also strongly feels the need to make a good living. I don't need to be rich, but I feel that with the salary I expect to make I'll feel poor.

It's not that I only care about money, but money represents certain things for me, like being respected and having power and choices. It really hurts my feelings when I see how other people my age have so much more than me, more choices, more freedom to do things that I can't afford. I feel like a "failure." It will help if I like my job, but I don't know if that's enough for me to accept making so little money. I'm tired of always having to count my pennies and be "cheap" in order to live within my means.

Thing is that if I didn't do this I don't know what I'd do. I think I'm smart--I did great in school--but somehow I don't seem to have the personality and skills that pay off in corporate settings. Consequently, I've never really done that well professionally.

I guess I'm not really sure what I'm asking but I could use a boost/vote of confidence/helpful advice because I'm in grad school and it's really tough to feel that maybe it's all a huge mistake. Do you think a grad degree can open other doors for me even if I don't pursue work in the field I'm studying? There are people I know who didn't even finish college who are incredibly successful in their careers. This makes me feel bad because I've just never been able to find where I belong. I am worried that working in this profession I'll feel like I'm "settling" because it doesn't meet what I feel is a minimum salary requirement for me to be happy.

"Obnoxious" isn’t quite it either

jessicapierce — Tue, 26 Sep 2006 13:43:48 -0800

Is there a word to describe a person who repeatedly becomes convinced that someone else is sick with various obscure ailments, based on flimsy or imagined evidence? I've already come up with "transferred hypochondria" and "wack neurosis." What I'm really asking is whether this is a common phenomenon and whether it is recognized as a legitimate, specific condition.

I ask because I know someone who does this. It goes beyond old wives' tale, grandma-caliber "put a sweater on, you'll catch your death" fretting - this is a persistent, manic conviction that I'm currently suffering from everything from depression to random glandular disorders to trichotillomania. (I'm not.) Nastily, I'd love to be able to add to my usual response of "No, I really don't have X," "but I think you may have Y." And I'm curious about this condition, if it is a recognized condition and not just straight-up lunacy.

The origin of sexual vocalisations...

0bvious — Tue, 10 Jan 2006 20:40:30 -0800

When we have sex it is usually women who utter the most vocal noise. What are the possible evolutionary origins of this? Can this phenomenon be found in any other animals? Has any research been done on whether female sexual utterances are physical or psychological in origin?

Am I completely off the mark with my original assumption?

Does "I have a high tolerance for pain" actually mean the opposite?

quacky — Wed, 07 Dec 2005 11:51:56 -0800

When you say you have a high tolerance for pain, don't you really mean to say "I love to complain about how much I hurt"? Or: is this really a case of the more you say it the less you mean it? It's always seemed to me that people who claim to have a "high tolerance for pain" really have just the opposite. Proximity to such people has always left me thinking they're a helluva lot more sensitive, and actually bitch and moan a whole lot more, than I would in reaction to "equal amounts of pain."

What is the psychological deal here? How come people who make this claim are usually the LEAST tolerant and MOST whiny about basic kinds of pain?

I know that the experience of pain is entirely subjective, and that even daring to compare with someone else opens up a philosophical can of worms ... So let's just stick with pop psychology for now.

The Common Involuntary Shudder

0bvious — Tue, 15 Nov 2005 20:11:12 -0800

Many years ago someone told me the recognised term for the kind of involuntary shudder that commonly affects people at rest. You know the kind that spontaneously rocks you, just for a moment, like you are shaking off the ghoulies, like the cliche says 'someone was walking on your grave'? I have since lost this word to time, and searching the internet has brought only partial results. Does anyone know it?

Help me. I can't seem to 'switch off'.

nafrance — Thu, 23 Jun 2005 16:56:22 -0800

PsychFilter: Help me. I can't seem to 'switch off'. I can't relax. I don't feel 'stressed', but I have never seemed to be able to 'switch my brain off' and just relax. It feels like it's constantly working away - almost fighting against me! This is leading to constant forgetfulness, and sometimes severe lack of sleep (I often need tablets to aid getting to sleep).

I've tried many, many methods of relaxation - tapes, books, cd's, music, binaural-beat systems, self-hypnosis attempts. Each time, I just feel like I can't clear out my head and switch off for a while.

I'm also a recent convert to David Allen's GTD system (see 43folders.com), and the 'open loops' he described were a big problem. Now even after being more organized and productive than ever, it just seems as though my brain is now making things up to think about.
(Yes, this is quite difficult to describe!)

Best way to describe it: I don't always feel in control of my thoughts.

Is there something wrong with me? Should I go and see a shrink? Is there anything that can help? (a system, a drug, a lobotomy)
[Note: I do find alcohol to help somewhat, but I don't really like drinking to that level...not too keen on illegal substances, either!]

Direct experience with adult ADHD diagnostic tests

nprigoda — Sun, 29 Feb 2004 11:03:29 -0800

Does anyone have experience with tests required for a diagnosis of ADHD in adults? [MI] I'm interested in how different the testing procedure for attention deficit disorder in adults is from the ones used to diagnose children. Is it a multi-part test? Does anyone have personal experience with ADD as an adult?
I'm planning a discussion with my doctor, and want to know what I might be getting into.

Does the word "paranoid" have an antonym?

mgtrott — Tue, 16 Dec 2003 16:11:19 -0800

Does the word "paranoid" have an antonym? In other words, can there be a one-word opposite of paranoid? My guess is no since it's a defined clinical state; however since it's used casually, has an antonym evolved?