Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with graduation

I think they provide the recruits with coats.

explosion — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 08:09:20 -0800

What's a good present for someone going into the Navy? My little brother has joined the Navy and is going to basic training this fall. However, because his friends are going to college in the fall, his "going away" party is next weekend, so I have about 10 days to find a good present.

To be honest, we're not that close, he's 10 years younger than me, and growing up in different households (we share a father, but have different mothers), he is more like a cousin. That said, he's a good kid and I love him, I just don't know what he's into, aside from kind of generically knowing he likes cars.

So, uh, what do you give an 18-year-old who's joining the Navy? I'm looking to spend somewhere between $30 and $100.

Oh, and he'll be training in the Great Lakes area, I don't know if that helps.

What should I get as a graduation present for my sister - quickly?

Kirn — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 14:19:22 -0800

What should I get as a graduation present for my sister - quickly? My sister is about to graduate from university/college and is hoping to work in mental health. I've only got a couple of days before I go up to see her so I need to pick up a little present quick - I was thinking a really nice book would be ideal, but I wasn't able to find one just browsing. (Ideally it'd be both a beautiful hardback book and something appropriate to the occasion - about life after university, or life in your early to mid-20s, or something..) However I only have a couple of days to get this, so speedy suggestions much appreciated!! Not only books, anything else as well (I was also thinking a nice pen or journal or something) but something I can probably pick up where I am (Brighton, UK) without having to order online. I was thinking up to about £40-50 or so but don't let that be a factor in your speedy and helpful suggestions!! :)

To buy, or to rent?

heathkit — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 01:04:58 -0800

How do you find a good accountant, or other professional, to help you decide when it's right to buy a house? I have a friend who just graduated law school and is trying to work out whether she wants to buy or rent next year.

She's in an... interesting situation. She has education loans from law school and already has a job lined up in NY at a good firm. She wants to go back to grad school, so she only wants to work for a couple of years, and she also doesn't know if she'll want to stay in NY or not.

So, she needs to know her options. Is it better to pay off the loan, or just make the minimum payments since she can get loan forgiveness when her income drops when she goes back to school? How long should she stay in NY if she's buying? What should she do about taxes? Stuff like that.

She's asked me to help, but I have no idea where to begin. I guess the right thing to do is to get an accountant, but we're not even sure who to look for or what to ask. How do you make decisions like this?

proper protocol for flower leis

SLC Mom — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 11:04:29 -0800

Quick: for High School graduation: Do I give my daughter a lei before the ceremony so she can wear it all through (is that tacky?), or only after, as a gift (but then no one will see it)? I've got 20 minutes to decide, sorry for the rush.

What do I wear under my grad gown?

tamarack — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:24:34 -0800

I'm graduating (university) Friday. What do I wear under my gown? I've been given the head's up that I might be called out for something at convocation, so I'm feeling nervous about how I'll look in my gown-wearing photos. I don't get the gown ahead of time, and I don't even know the length of the thing. I'll be leaving and arriving gown-less, so I won't be going in my underpants. I feel like I should be wearing something nice, but not at the expense of looking like I'm stealing a couch under my gown. Advice? Female dress.

How do I make a song longer?

Flakypastry — Mon, 18 May 2009 09:44:07 -0800

Looping within a song for a slideshow? I am using an instrumental piece for a slideshow that is not long enough to fill the show. How do I loop the song internally to stretch it to the length I need? I am putting together a series of slide shows in PrShow Gold for my daughter's High School Music Department. The Seniors slideshow is about 8 minutes long - the instrumental piece (suggested by tylerfulltilt in this question) I think would loop nicely if I could figure out a way to cut a portion inside the song and then paste it within the piece to make it longer.

I downloaded Audacity - is that the way to go here? If so, does anyone know of a good tutorial that would help me learn how to do this?

Alternatively, will this song be way too long at 8 minutes? The slideshow is a series of baby and then Senior photos, so there's no real breaking point within the show to change songs.

Any ideas out there? Thank you!

What's the Best Thing You've Ever Seen Here?

katyjack — Sun, 17 May 2009 17:21:19 -0800

My son is graduating from high school in a week. I want to make him a Best of Ask Metafilter book with all the best advice from the hive mind. So I want to send my son out into the world with the best possible advice he can start up with, meaning I want to send him out with all the best advice I've found over on my years here. I've saved a ton of things, but I'm old so I'd love to hear from people who are in college or just out or people in their 30s - so basically everyone, including people my age and older - can you give me the link to the best advice you've ever read here, something that actually changed your view of the world or made you a better person?

What can I buy my brother?

nuclear_soup — Wed, 13 May 2009 07:55:10 -0800

Help me pick out a graduation present for my Yale-bound brother. My brother is graduating soon and will be off to start work on his Ph. D. at Yale. We come from a pretty lower-middle class family, and the successes of my siblings are very exciting to all of us. I want to get him a very nice graduation/birthday present, but I don't have much money to spend. He's notoriously picky, so getting him a gift is difficult, but everyone here always has great ideas, so I thought I'd ask.

A bit about him: He's 22, loves coffee, doesn't drive, used to work at a bike co-op and is still interested in biking, likes silly/wacky things (was going to buy me a poster of different types of beards for Christmas), has a macbook, will be living in Yale graduate housing and will be working on a degree in Chemistry (his undergraduate degree is also in Chemistry, with a minor in math). Oh, and he'll be spending a month in Taiwan this summer. I have only about $50 to spend (a bit more, if it's a really good gift). Any ideas? Bonus points if anyone knows any good books about New Haven, because I was thinking of getting one to go with whatever else I get him.

Thanks in advance!

Leaving.

Anonymous — Tue, 12 May 2009 19:56:20 -0800

I'm graduating. I'm leaving my girlfriend and will be far away from her, and we both don't have the option to be close for the next two years. Hence, it's ending. Any advice for feeling better? It varies recently... we decided about a week ago that it makes sense to break up when I leave. She's going abroad (the other side of the planet) next semester, and I have a job a few hours from school. She's a sophomore, and we've been dating for a semester, and it's the best we've ever experienced, happy and healthy and fun. I love her, not in the tragic Romeo&J sense, or in the must-marry sense (I hate those sense), but in the this-is-a-person-I-love sense.

But we're going our ways, and it makes sense to go those ways and remember this as a wonderful time instead of hanging on and this possibly becoming one of those strained relationships that flickers out. I think in a year I might look back and say it's the right decision, but it's damn hard to think right now.

I'd like to tell her that, in two years, if she's in the area and would like, we could get tea or something. Is that a bad idea?

I feel okay recently when I'm with her or with friends, but alone I start to feel apocalyptic. I hate that we're already talking about 'our relationship' in the past tense.

Part of asking this is just in the asking, but please, I'd appreciate any words of wisdom in this situation. I know that the rest of my life won't be tragic and terrible, but leaving the best relationship behind as well as lots of other friendships (and constantly being reassured that since I have a high-paying job, I should be happy) is killing me a little.

Thanks.

Moving to Los Angeles out of college?

Dukat — Sun, 10 May 2009 06:43:29 -0800

MovingtoLosAngelesfilter: Mulling over move to Los Angeles in June 2010 after graduating from university. Info/advice needed on L.A. life, finding apartments, and finding (preferably) job in a major movie studio. I am currently a college student studying abroad in Europe and have used the time here to think about my future. I've never felt more in control of my life, more responsible for my own destiny. That being said, I've been thinking about moving to Los Angeles after graduating from college in May/June 2010.

Why: I like Los Angeles, in the short few times I've been there. From experience, I know I like big cities and operate well in them, but I also like the idea of being close to beach, canyons, desert, and parks for the weekends. Also love movies, art, books, cafes, diversity.

Education / Job I am an Economics major graduating from a pretty prestigious liberal arts college. I will probably graduate summa cum laude. However, I'm not really invested in economics, as much as I love it, and as much as it's taught me about analysis. I just don't want to do it for the rest of my life, for a variety of reasons.

My hobby has always been the movie industry. Yeah, you and everyone else in America. But over the years, I've always enjoyed reading biographies of great directors, reading "behind the scenes of," reading books on screenwriting, directing, cinematography. (I love the problem-solving of it all, having to think on your feet, creative brainstorming, etc.) I just thought this was never possible for me and never thought about it as an actual career. But since studying abroad, I "woke up" and realized this was a pretty major passion and dominant theme throughout my life. I feel like, hey, I'm young. I should give this a shot, at least.

My question to this theme:
I see myself working in a movie studio, maybe in production management. Is this feasible for someone who has a college degree in a totally unrelated field? How should I approach applying for jobs? It seems like studios have a ton of jobs (from what I've seen) available, but I get the feeling they burn through people pretty quickly. Is this true? Why? How can I make myself stand out (in a good way)? Or is it impossible to make myself stand out and I should plan on being hired because I'm young, will work for food, have stamina and a pulse?

Living : I already live in a studio apartment that is as wide as I am (hyperbole, but not far from the truth). I like it, because it's my little box, and the space issue doesn't bother me a bit. Any suggestions for apartment hunting in Los Angeles? Should I find a rommate? What should I expect as far as rent (in general swaths: such as: for X in Santa Monica, you will pay $Y, for Z in Culver City you will generally pay $A) Will entry-level-job that everyone wants in studio be enough to pay for rent? Do I need to plan on having a second job?

Transportation : It sounds horrendous from all the other AskMe threads I've read. I'm used to city traffic, but I know I have to multiply my current situation by a factor of 100. So I'll need to find an apartment with a parking place for a car, right? Will this complicate matters? Also, I've read a lot about valet parking. Is this really prevelant throughout the whole city, or are there parts of L.A. with more parking places and less valet parking?

Also, I have not been really impressed with LAX. (The fact that the international terminal is 20 minutes away and one must go through another security check does not endear me to it.) What are the general thoughts on LAX? Does it function well, despite appearances?

Social Life I'm a nerdy but nice introvert (I get out and about, though--just prefer small groups of people to large ones). I like: books (everything from Hesiod to David Foster Wallace, with a soft spot for Russian literature), movies, art, coffeehouses, exploring nature and being outside, music, conversations on capitalism to anarchism, social trends, culture, language, diversity, social justice, the meaning of life, travel.

It seems like L.A. has two natures: the vapid, Hummer-driving side, and then all the artists who are ready to overthrow the System as We Know It. How true is this stereotype? How friendly are the locals? How hard would it be for someone like me to find a likeminded social circle? Does anyone have any suggestions for finding friends (meetups, etc) along these lines? I'm hedging my bets on the artists, and the fact that it's a huge city.

That seems to be most of my questions. I've read almost every AskMeFi thread tagged with losangeles, and favorited most of them, so I'm just trying to do some basic research and gather my facts. I have some books on Los Angeles, and a map as well. Just trying to get a solid lay of the land and brainstorm.

I apologize for the multi-faceted question, but really, I'm open to any recommendations on the themes I've outlined above. General advice is also very much appreciated. Thank you in advance for your responses!

Exit, stage...center?

thankyoumuchly — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 20:41:25 -0800

What are the next steps for a Theater major going into her Senior year of College? My younger sister, a college Theater major, will be starting her Senior year this upcoming Fall. I would like to help her transition, over the next 18 months, into the working world as a well prepared thespian. The catch? I don't know the ropes.

Here's the background: I am in business, my father was in business. My older sibling is in health care, my mother was in health care. Myself and my older sibling had graduation/senior year/interview/job world questions answered by Dad and Mom. Our parents provided us guidance on everything job related such as "how do I interview for jobs my Senior year... should I choose job X or Y... what steps should I be taking now... how should I market myself?".

Our parents still have good advice for our Theatrically inclined younger sister, but they can't provided her with the same type of intimate industry knowledge that I received.

I'm turning to the hive mind for answers! What are the do's and don'ts? Should my little sister be attending job fairs, create a portfolio, apply to the Screen Actors Guild, hire an agent? What am I missing? Please be honest, I can take it (remember I'm in business, the truth no longer scares me ;). She is open to my advice but I have two left feet when it comes to keeping her in the lime light after the curtain closes on college (o boy, maybe she and I should do a comedy/acting routine).

The end goal is to make sure my little sister doesn't miss her que when it comes to the next steps she should be taking in her upcoming Senior year to ensure she has a job, or is in a viable position to market herself to parts in plays, movies, etc.

Thank you in advance!

Ideas for a graduation gift for a psychology student

jinatrix — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 04:19:18 -0800

Graduation gift for a psychology student My girlfriend is graduating from undergrad soon and will be pursuing a doctorate in clinical psychology after graduation. I am looking for ideas for a graduation gift, whether related to her field or not. :)

What's a cure for restlessness?

pintapicasso — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 09:44:33 -0800

I'm 22 and feel like I'm missing out on something big, but I don't know what I want. I graduated from college last May with a degree in social services. I never studied abroad, even though all of my friends did, because I just didn't have the motivation (or the money, really) to get it together. I'm kind of an anomaly among my social circle... traveling is the "thing" to do, and for good reason, I know.

Now, I've graduated, and I live in a city about a half hour from my hometown. I commute back to my hometown everyday to work in a small cafe. I like being close to the people I grew up with, but I am burning out in food service. I feel like I should "get out there".. go abroad, move someplace else/or just do something that will make me look back in ten years and say, "go me!". But I'm scared, and I don't know if I necessarily want to. I've halfway-filled out applications to WorldTeach and the PeaceCorps, but I've never finished them because I think, "shit - do I really want to go to teach in China for a year?"

I really enjoy being by myself, going for walks and reading. I also spend about fifteen hours a week volunteering with Bhutanese refugee families in my city. I love it and I've thought about applying for a job at the agency. But I'm afraid I will really regret it if I don't put myself out there, physically. The problem is that there is no place I truly want to go, and I don't have a lot of money to spend doing something half-heartedly. I'm also scared, because I have only been abroad once before, when I was 12. But not doing anything is making me feel worthless.

I look around me and see people who want to go somewhere, and they make it happen. I guess I'm looking for books, movies, or first hand experience that will motivate me to make a change in my life. What's the cure for this restlessness?

Niece Graduation Gift?

sarajane — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 13:06:43 -0800

Eldest niece will graduate High School soon. We aren't particularly close, but I'd like to give her something useful and lasting - any suggestions?

pre-commencement blues

Anonymous — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 20:22:32 -0800

How should I cope, not with graduation, but the loneliness that will come with it? (A couple of things that I think might be relevant first:

1. I don't know if it's like this at other colleges/universities, but at my school we have activities based on our class (by that, I mean graduation year), and in some sense it is kind of like an extracurricular organization. This means we fundraise and have all sorts of events. It also means that there's a lot of stuff that's very class-oriented. Included in this is senior week, which is basically a week before graduation when the seniors do various activities together, such as go to Six Flags or wine-tasting--the activities change each year. There is actually a gap between finals and graduation, so we are able to pull this off. In addition, in the few days before graduation, there's a senior luncheon, a farewell ceremony, BBQ dinners, and countless other things that aren't part of senior week, but are still very class-oriented.

2. I go to a small four-year liberal arts college less than an hour away from a metropolis on the Eastern Seaboard. Vague, I know, but I do want to be anonymous.)

So I'm a senior. In my past four years here, my interactions with the other people in my class have not been very successful. My first year I got into a few complicated situations with quite a few people, including the people I spent much of freshman year with, and encounters between myself and them have been awkward and strained ever since. I've befriended a few people from classes, only to wind up not speaking to them again when they went abroad or after the class ended. And due to some social/mood issues that I'm currently grappling with (social anxiety disorder, among loads of other things that I'll gladly elaborate on via e-mail), I had a lot of trouble with making and keeping friends. The one person in my year with whom I was even remotely close inexplicably stopped talking to me this semester after returning from academic leave. (That alone did damage to my psyche, simply because we were kind of close and I liked her a lot and will probably never see her again after June, but that's a whole other post...)

The point is, I'm so out of touch with my class that it's not even funny. And it doesn't help that the senior week activities and graduation stuff have recently been announced and the time is nearing. You see, whenever I've gone to events that our class has had in the past, I'd usually not be close enough with most of the people there, so I'd latch on to a group whom I kind of half knew until they ditched me for some other people, and then I'd spend the rest of the night standing around awkwardly until I left on the verge of tears. Every event has been like this, including a beer appreciation class that was primarily made up of seniors. But now I have to face a whole bunch of events throughout my last two weeks here. There's a senior week event that I really want to go to, but the awkwardness is making me have second thoughts. And there are senior lunches, brunches, etc. that are not related to senior week at all, and some of which are mandatory. And then there's graduation itself, which will most likely consist of me introducing my mom to my profs and me chasing said profs down while my mom asks me if I'm going to introduce her to my friends, who are more or less nonexistent. And in the few days after, I'll see further proof that I don't exist to the rest of my class on Facebook and other fora, when everyone will be taking pictures of everyone else and putting them up on Facebook albums. While I don't mean to be shallow, I would like some pictorial proof that I had friends at college, admittedly for other people in addition to myself. (I am aware that that is a huge insecurity thing, and I'm working on it. I know my logic is flawed, but I can't seem to get over it.)

I have a feeling that that's pretty much how it will pan out. And it hurts me to no end. Whenever my profs talk about their college days and how important college friends are, I almost cry because virtually none of the few friends I have are in my own year. And I have a feeling that once I leave, I'm not going to talk much to the underclasspeople I know, some of whom will be seniors themselves. Sometimes I wonder if, when I get married or something and I put it in the alumni bulletin/e-mail newsletter thing, if anyone will care and say "Congratulations on your marriage/baby/promotion/etc.!" I don't think anyone will. I mean, does anyone in my class care now?

There are very few seniors in the classes I'm taking now, and even less in the extracurriculars I'm in, so I've pretty much given up hope of finding an '09 social circle that I can call my own before June. But I want to have some fun. I want to go to these events and not get nervous, but I'm not sure if I can because I'll just be standing around awkwardly while everyone else is talking to everyone else. Meanwhile, I want to prove to people--mostly family, since I did have problems with social stuff in high school, also--that I did indeed talk to people at college.

I'm not sure what I'm asking for here. I guess maybe a sounding board or something, since I know you guys on AskMe are incredibly blunt, yet oddly comforting. Did anyone here not make friends in college? Or was in the same boat as me? How did you handle it? What should I do?

Throwaway e-mail: lonelyatgraduation@gmail.com

Words to inspire my brother as he writes a high school graduation speech?

melodykramer — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 17:17:13 -0800

A family member is graduating first in his class but is having trouble with the graduation speech-writing part of things. Any thoughts on where an 18 year old could look for inspiration for writing a speech to commemorate graduating high school? I'm trying to help my brother out by giving him speeches he can look to for wisdom and inspiration when crafting his valedictory speech.

I've found a bunch of cliche things to say...but they're exactly that. Wear sunscreen...yada yada....we look forward, not back.

I told him I'd help by Asking Metafilter if they remember any hilarious or awesome speeches from their own graduations or whether there's a particular body of writing he can look to for guidance. He's 18. Typical suburban high school. Everyone will scatter to the wind afterwards.

Thank you in advance.

What song should I use?

Alec Loudenback — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 17:24:50 -0800

I need a sentimental/moving song for a slideshow about senior varsity basketball players that will be leaving. It's a ~five minute slideshow that has pictures of the senior (Boys) basketball players that will be graduating this year. There are about 10 pictures of the guys growing up from when they were very young to today.

I've been put in charge of it by the booster club (both my parents are members) and am told by them to include music.

The song I think is the best is "Your Hand in Mine" by Explosions in the Sky. I like that song because of the sentimental and hopeful emotions that it evokes, regardless of the fact that there are no words.

However, my mom is, and always has been, adamantly opposed to instrumental, non-vocal music. Her suggestions are the following:

Time of My Life - David Cook
No Such Thing - John Mayer
My Wish -Rascal Flatts
Graduation - Vitamin C

There's a few reasons why I don't like the suggestion of those songs:

1) Timing. I was so into "Your Hand in Mine" that I already edited it to be an appropriate length, and that is much easier to do with an instrumental than a vocal song [I think]. And her suggestion to this problem is to play one and a half songs, which I think sounds very unprofessional. I am getting paid to do the slideshow because I am good at what I do, and I take pride in my work.

2)Some of them are really cheesy - Vitamin C? Please.

3) I really don't think you need words to convey the emotions. My mom thinks so. She doesn't have a graduating senior (I am, but didn't play on the team this past year, though I did previous years) and I think that if she was feeling the emotion of seeing her boy growing up through pictures to the big (ex)basketball player that he was today, she wouldn't need words to tell her what she is feeling. (I am not on the slideshow).

I guess what I am looking for is suggestions as to what all of you think. If you prefer the instrumental "Your Hand in Mine," or one of her suggestions, or another.

Please don't make me use "Graduation" MeFi!

Rites of passage and the requisite advice

drea — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 22:55:23 -0800

Any advice for a fresh graduate jumping from a world of possibility to a world of potential naysayers? Help me tone down the naïveté, or whatever else needs to be done. I'm about to graduate and head off into the real world and from the looks of it college was merely an incubator of impossible ideals and untested ambitions to "change the world". I have so many ideas but was advised to work quietly instead of splashing around without much result. Maybe I just watch too much TED or read too many can-do books on social change. In any case, I need to balance out this idealism so I won't get burned out quickly and/or be tempted to give up at every setback.

Books for fresh graduates would be great, real-life experiences would be great, I just need to be more informed about super big dreams and getting there. Thanks a lot.

Awesome Lasting Gifts for an 18 year-old guy?

SweetTeaAndABiscuit — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 15:09:49 -0800

I have two "significant events" upcoming for my son; he will turn 18 in mid-March and graduate from high school in May. Looking for great gift ideas that will stand the test of time. I'd love to find the perfect gift(s) that he would think awesome now, but would also last a long time (if not forever) and become sentimental possessions for him in the future.

He dresses in jeans and t-shirts, loves to read (but doesn't love school), is an avid XBox player. He doesn't have, nor has never worn a watch, but he does have 2 rings (a high school class ring and a ring that belonged to his grandfather), so another ring probably wouldn't fill the bill.

As a single mom with prom, graduation, birthdays, etc, coming up, my budget is limited; probably no more than $100-150 for each gift (less spendy, but still awesome would be fantastic!) Any great ideas of gifts you've given or received? Know anything so crazy cool any guy would love to have it? Thanks, MeFi!

Fun songs about growing up and graduating?

ginagina — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 07:22:37 -0800

Fun songs for college graduation mix cd? A good friend is graduating college and I'd like to give her some songs that will help with the coming job search/life changes. Cheesy is ok, but I'd prefer songs that talk about transition, growing up, etc. but are upbeat.

Think: MGMT Time to Pretend

Thanks so much!

What do you wish you had when you graduated?

AceRock — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 05:13:27 -0800

What (item) do you wish you had when you graduated from college? My brother is graduating from college after this semester and I want to get him a present he will end up really appreciating. So, what (item or items) do you wish someone had given you when you graduated from college, or otherwise entered the real world for the first time?

I don't want want to limit ideas in any way, but if it helps to inspire: he's graduating with a degree in engineering, but he loves writing fiction.

Adult grad gift ideas.

thewalrusispaul — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 19:54:05 -0800

Help! I need suggestions for a college graduation gift for my 48 year old brother in law that says... I'm really proud of you, you beer drinkin', deer huntin', north woods redneck, wall street worshipin', 80's caine sniffin', Reaganite, mustachioed, b@strd. From your loving, granola crunchin', sandal wearin', organic pimpin', Utne reading, Wellstone worshipin', green believin', bleeding heart, pain in your arse little sister in law. I love you man, way to go!

Graduation + Wedding = Leech?

alpha_betty — Wed, 28 May 2008 10:13:30 -0800

June graduation + August wedding = announcements and invitations go out within a month of each other. Do I look like a gift-grabbing leech? In June, I'm graduating with an AA degree. In August, I'm getting married in a semi-destination wedding.

Owing to the travel involved with attending the wedding, invitations were sent out about a month ago. A few days later, I was reminded that I need to order and send out graduation announcements. The mailing list for the wedding invitations includes everyone who was sent a graduation announcement. About a week ago, I finally mailed the graduation announcements, having tried to wait as long as possible after sending the wedding invitations because of my (maybe asinine?) fear of appearing gift-grabby at worst, and inconsiderate at best.

Since these are both typically gift-heavy occasions I am concerned about how the timing of the announcement and the invitation might be perceived. Do I look like a leech?

Awkward parental relations: how to prevent?

Anonymous — Wed, 14 May 2008 15:07:03 -0800

My divorced parents are both going to be at my college graduation party. How do I deal with this? My parents divorced when I was in grade school. It was not a friendly divorce; there was animosity on both sides and all of the "how divorced parents should speak to their child" rules were broken as both mother and father openly squabbled and berated each other in front of me. They still do this, making nasty comments about each other when opportunity arises, but now I am old enough to remove myself from the negative situation.

This weekend, both will be at a smallish graduation party at my apartment. Originally, one parent was not going to attend but when that parent's friends indicated that they would come, that parent felt obligated to attend.

I don't know how to interact with both of them at the same time and feel like the situation will be horribly awkward. For example, what if one parent's friends are all there and the other parent's friends are not? Do I just leave one parent sitting on a couch while I interact with other people/other parent?

I am sort of hoping that the parent:parent friends ratio is equal and that they will both be able to occupy themselves and completely ignore each other. But, if that doesn't happen, how do I deal with this other than just getting really drunk?

Graduation gift for a future homeless counselor?

scottso17 — Wed, 14 May 2008 09:43:22 -0800

My sister graduates college this week, and I want to get her a gift that will be useful for her at work. She'll be counseling homeless people at various shelters and other locations in Washington DC. Besides pepper spray (our running joke), what are some practical gifts I could get her? Price is not important. This will be her first time in the workforce, so some general work stuff might be good, but I'm at a loss for ideas. Also -- something that a mobile worker (i.e., without a regular desk) could use might work too.

I tend to buy her techie gifts, but that's certainly not a limitation. She's very stylish and loves trendy things.

Thanks for your ideas.