Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with gift and thankyou

Gift for a woman I barely know?

Phire — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 07:48:31 -0800

I need help coming up with a gift idea for a 40-50 year old woman that I don't know very well at all. My dad and I will be visiting Chicago for a few days in the near future, and we'll be staying with a friend of his. They were pretty close about ten years ago when both our families lived in the same city, but now we live about a thousand miles apart and they very rarely see each other.

Last time he stayed with this family a few years ago he brought a gift that was more oriented towards the dad, whom he knows better. This time he'd like to bring a gift that the hostess can really appreciate. I've been tasked with finding such a gift.

The only things I know about her is that she's not religious, that she has a daughter who is around 21-year-old, and that she works as a technician at a Big Pharma company. What can we bring in the price range of $60-80 CAD that would be appropriate as a thank-you gift? We're in Ottawa, but bringing the usual maple syrup and whatnot would feel kind of tacky.

Where to buy electronic gift card?

zooropa — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 08:00:19 -0800

Thank you filter: What are some good ways you can easily send a gift card to a co-worker? I just started a new job a few weeks ago and several folks have really gone out of their way to help me with some "quick" questions. I'd like to give them a little gift card as a way of saying thanks. Nothing extravagant. Just something simple -- $10 for iTunes, $10 for Amazon, etc.

Is there a way to do this electronically without having to go out and buy cards at a store? We're a Web-based business, so it'd be nice to do something where all they have to do is click a link for an electronic gift certificate. And if so, are there other workplace-friendly ideas besides the obvious (Amazon and iTunes).

And yes, I do write thank you notes. I'm a big believer in a simple handwritten note and write them often. But this is slightly different.

Thank-you gift for my cousin?

obliquicity — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 10:47:49 -0800

I need help coming up with a good thank-you gift for my (female, early 30s) cousin at the end of a 3-week visit. I've been staying with my cousin in London for about 3 weeks, and would like to get her something meaningful to say thank you. But to get to the point: I don't know her very well (I grew up in the US, she in the UK); despite being exactly the same age we are entirely dissimilar in personality/likes/interests; she is currently on a diet so food is out (including taking her out for a meal); she doesn't drink, so alcohol is out; and she's already got every household tchotchke thing (candles, bath/beauty products, picture frames, etc.) I can think of. Oh, and she works in the entertainment industry so things like "here are tickets to X" are entirely redundant. What's more, she works fairly long hours and spends each weekend out of town in order to take care of a relative, so her schedule can be tricky.

So based on what I know, she likes: relaxing with tv/movies; spa weekends; her family's dogs; trashy magazines (her description); hanging out with her godson; mystery novels and chick lit. She doesn't like: running or other exercise for its own sake; art, especially of the modern and contemporary varieties; crafty stuff; jigsaw puzzles.

To top it all off, she's far, far wealthier than I am, so I'd rather get something that demonstrates some imagination than something that just says "here's a random luxury item" -- because we're in different enough financial brackets that it would probably come across as "here's something kinda tacky." Plus, she's the kind of person who just buys whatever it is she wants -- so she already has all the latest DVDs, etc.

And for those of you who want to suggest donating to charity in her name/honor -- I've sponsored her in the Race for Life this weekend, but want to do something that's actually for *her*, since she's been doing so much to make my stay here fun.

Thank you for being my personal Geek Squad.

variella — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 12:45:14 -0800

Appropriate gift for a volunteer computer techie with fantastic interpersonal skills? Over the past 3 years my sister's boyfriend has been very generous with his time, patience, tech support, and minor computer repairs (former job, now a side gig). He recently spent several hours helping me research and purchase a laptop, followed up with me to see how it went, and when he came over for dinner yesterday offered to 'set it up'.

Not only did he go through the basics with me, without being asked he did several other things he knew would be helpful while I made dinner for all of us (networked our home computers, linked to work accounts for research I do at home, and several other tasks I'm not quite certain how to explain ;) )

I have the two of them over for dinner fairly often, but I'd like to show my appreciation specifically to him- we aren't particularly close, but he's been dating my sister for 3 years (they're planning on getting engaged after June convocation) and I'm very fond of him. Patient, kind, even-tempered, enjoys doing things for other people- all of this was done with no influence from my sister. He has declined to be paid for his time, and tends to appreciate thoughtful gifts more than things with specific monetary value (like gift certificates).

I'm planning on also writing a note, but what would be a great "thanks for everything, particularly the past few days" gift (max $50) to show my appreciation?.

No thank you

Anonymous — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 13:52:57 -0800

Holiday gift giving dilemma: I have two half-sisters. One always thanks me for gifts. The other rarely does. How to remain on good terms with both, but not feel like a chump? I have two half-sisters (full sisters to each other), with whom I would like to remain on good terms. Let's call them Abigail and Tracy. We don't know one another very well-- they are much younger than me and our father divorced their mother when they were young, so we haven't spent that much time together. Our father is now deceased. We're all adults--I'm 42 and married, Tracy is 32 and married, and Abigail is 30.

I often send them each a modest gift for Christmas; for example, the last two years it has been a cookbook. I don't expect them to reciprocate, and in fact some years I don't give them a gift. Abigail always thanks me and sometimes sends a gift herself. Tracy virtually never thanks me. In earlier years I thought "Well, she's young, I was pretty bad about thanking people when I was younger," or "She just started a new job," or "She just got married." But, you know, she's 32, she's married, she's obviously responsible in other areas of her life and I am running out of excuses for her. I feel like a chump. Abigail says Tracy never acknowledges her gifts, either.

So, what to do?

- If I stop giving gifts to Tracy and only give them to Abigail, I am sure that Tracy will know and will feel slighted. I really don't want this to happen. I want things to be good between us, that's the whole point. Plus, our dad always did shitty things to play us off one another, and I just don't want to get near that issue.

- On the other hand, I don't want to keep giving gifts to both like this. I'm afraid that perhaps Tracy perceives me as the weird distant relative who wants a relationship when she doesn't want one. I have a cousin like that, and I don't want to be that person. But I'm not sure that's it--she does occasionally e-mail and send pictures. I really don't know how she feels. Anyway, it seems stupid to keep giving gifts to someone who is saying loud and clear "I don't care."

- And I don't want to stop giving gifts to both of them. Abigail seems kind of into it. We've started to talk a little more by e-mail, and sometimes by phone. This is another little point of connection, an excuse to communicate.

I know some people will say "why don't you just talk to them about it?" Well, it's not like that. It's hard to explain, but that really isn't an option. I feel that in our particular circumstance it would seem too overt, too confrontational--too formal. We don't have enough of a relationship to have that conversation.

Thanks for reading. What do you think I should do?

How to best show my appreciation.

Laura in Canada — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 14:37:00 -0800

Should I get a gift for someone I worked for for 3 days who tipped me generously? Last week, I assisted someone from outside our company during a company event. I was paid my normal rate through my company, however this person also gave me a very generous tip (I was told by my company HR that I was allowed to keep this). I would like to show my appreciation, but I am not sure how. I thought about sending a gift with a note, however I only have his email address & I can't find a site that will allow me to do this other than for a gift certificate; I'd rather not get a gift certificate as it feels more like I'm returning part of the money this way (I know it is essentially the same with a physical gift, but the denomination on the certificate makes it different to me).

I'd still like to send a gift, so if anyone knows a site that will allow me to do this with only an email address, I'd appreciate any suggestions.

If that fails, I guess a nice email will have to suffice; any tips on what to say would also be appreciated.

How to say thank you to a musician

frosty_hut — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 16:07:33 -0800

What thank you gift to present to an unwilling interviewee? I'm trying to arrange an interview with a pretty famous artist in the classical music world. The guy is averse to interviews, I've been told, and if he agrees to meet with me, I'd like to give him something as a thank you. I'll give him an audio file of our interview as a matter of course, but I wanted to present him with some sort of thank you gift in addition to that.

Thing is, I don't know anything about this guy personally. I thought of bringing him a big bouquet of flowers, but that's more the kind of thing people do after a performance. I have no idea what he can or can't eat, can or can't drink, etc. Any ideas would be appreciated.

BTW: He's a pianist and the most famous member of a chamber ensemble that he founded decades ago, but he hasn't performed with them since the late seventies. The occasion is their reunion concert, and he may never perform with these guys again, so it's a pretty historic occasion.)

Gift for a coworker?

Coffeemate — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 12:35:43 -0800

I want to buy a gift for a coworker who took a promotion and will be leaving my department. What's something cool but not overly sentimental that she might like? When I started my job a year ago she was phenomenally helpful, always willing to answer questions, and a terrific mentor. I will be moving into the position she’s vacating.

She is:
About 50, but acts and feels younger
A wine lover and cat owner
Vegetarian

Her gift should be:
About $50
NOT a desk tchotchke
Fun and cool - and it need not match perfectly her interests listed above

Any ideas? I’ve looked through RedEnvelope.com, gifts.com, uncommongoods.com, and not been grabbed by anything. I’ll also be writing her a sincere thank-you note.

How do I say thank you to my mentor, ten years later?

SoulOnIce — Wed, 09 May 2007 18:42:30 -0800

A woman I greatly admire gave me a pep talk about all the potential and promise I had and how I'd go out into the world and do something with myself. Being incredibly insecure and full of self-doubt, I didn't believe her. That was 10 years ago... ... well, in a little over 2 months from now, it will be exactly 10 years to the day. Wonder of all wonders, I actually turned out okay. We had just finished lunch and for some reason, I'm not sure why, I pocketed a nickel thinking I'd keep it as a reminder. When I got home, I sealed it in an envelope, folded it in thirds, and wrote "Nickel bet, 7/16/97. Do not open til 7/16/07."

That envelope has been with me all along the way. I've had it in my wallet, tacked up on a board, tucked in my journal, stored in my desk drawer. It may seem silly, but it's something I look at from time to time and am reminded of how much of a positive impact this woman had on me. Now that the date is fast approaching, I want to do something for her. For me it stands as a testament to the fact that sometimes the little things you do for people have an immense impact.

I am almost postive she has no idea I kept that day or that moment as anything remarkable or special. In fact, I doubt she would even recall that day. I haven't actually talked to her in several years. She's currently some kind of high level administrator at a very prestigious university and we do have some mutual friends and acquaintances. How do I show my appreciation while incorporating this envelope and this nickel in the gesture? Should I just write a note and send it to her? Should I include some other kind of gift? Our paths might cross in the fall, should I wait to do something in person?

I not only want to say thank you, I also want to do something for her, but I'm at a loss as to exactly what. I appreciate any and all ideas.

What to get a younger guy I don't know well as a thank you gift?

Meifa — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 19:39:59 -0800

I'm moving cross-country. My boss's son attempted to help me find a place. He didn't come up with anything, but he tried, so I'd like to get him a thank you gift. But what? I don't know him very well, so I can't get him anything very personalized. I was leaning toward a nice big box of Godiva, but someone told me that's too feminine. I'm absolutely clueless about wine, so that's pretty much out.

To make it more difficult:
1) Guy's mid-20s, attorney.
2) He currently lives 1400 miles away from me, so it has to be something shippable.

What's a good thank-you gift for a regular, working guy?

redhotchips — Wed, 08 Nov 2006 11:54:28 -0800

What's a good thank-you gift for my girlfriend's driver's ed teacher? My girlfriend just passed her road test (after many years of procrastinating) and wants to send a thank-you gift to her driving instructor. He's a working immigrant and has been teaching driver's ed for awhile. He doesn't like it though and wants to switch jobs. What can she get him that he would appreciate? Flowers, fruit/chocolate/spa gift baskets amongst other standard gifts seem rather pretentious and not appropriate for a regular guy. She's looking for something under $30. Any suggestions?

Thanks UK Boss, Sincerely US Employee

like_neon — Thu, 07 Sep 2006 14:38:13 -0800

My future boss has been extremely helpful and considerate about my upcoming move to the UK, so I'd like to bring him a gift as a thank you. What would a Brit like from the States/California/San Diego? Restrictions to keep in mind:
- Easily accessible since I leave very soon.
- Packable, it will have to be checked in my luggage for my flight
- ~$20-$30

Suggestions so far but I wasn't really stuck on them:
- Spicy Hot Chocolate : I like it, but not sure if this is a worldwide taste pleaser.
- Chocolates: Like what, Hershey's? I personally prefer European chocolates anyway.
- Trader Joe's snacks: This is more for me though as I'm hoping he'll share. :P

Realllly do NOT want to get a San Diego/Sea World/Wild Animal Park themed hat/sweatshirt/tshirt, I think that would be pretty lame.

Gift ideas for great coworkers

SirStan — Thu, 17 Aug 2006 06:05:34 -0800

Suggestions for a gift for coworkers - Yesterday I broke my toe playing volleyball at a company retreat. I appreciated the support from two employees (coworker who cleaned it up, and taped it up, and one who took me to the ER, waited for me, gave me a good dinner, and offered to drive me home because I have a standard). I would like to give each of them a gift as a thank you. Suggestions?

Thanks for the tug

tdreyer1 — Fri, 21 Jul 2006 05:47:28 -0800

What should I buy to say thank you? Brace yourself, too many details ahead. Ok. Last night, as I was leaving my horse riding lesson, I took a curve too fast (on gravel) and found myself in the ditch. Thankfully, I was just a mile from my teacher's house, and the car was fine. I called them, and her husband came and pulled me out with his truck. Now I want to get them a card and a gift to say thank you, but I don't know what to buy them! Any and all suggestions will be appriciated. Thanks y'all.

Good gifts for pediatric nurses

jrossi4r — Mon, 03 Jul 2006 11:00:42 -0800

What would be the best gift to give the pediatric nursing staff that is caring for my daughter? My daughter has been hospitalized following an appendectomy. I've been absolutely blown away by the care she has received and would like to show my appreciation. I plan on writing a letter, but would like to send them something as well. It would have to be a group gift, as I'm afraid of accidentally leaving anyone out, especially the night nurses whose names I was often to groggy to get. Any suggestions?

Thanking Bankers

crack — Tue, 06 Jun 2006 15:05:28 -0800

How to thank one's bankers/mortgage officers? A friend of mine who has his own small business, recently expanded and bought yet another business. He plans on expanding even further very soon. He is very grateful to two of his bankers (mortgage officers) for going to bat for him and getting his two million dollar loan approved. He wants to show his appreciation and get them each a gift ($500-$1000 price range). He's not sure how to handle this.
Would Bankers accept gifts from clients or would it be frowned upon? And if it is acceptable practice what would be the best way to go about showing his appreciation? Should he approach them first and ask them what they would prefer, or would it be better to simply present a gift? What kind of gift would be appropriate? Or is there a better alternative to giving gifts as a show of appreciation in this kind of situation. Thanks for your input.

Ugly Gift Etiquette

adamrice — Sat, 17 Jul 2004 19:50:57 -0800

EtiquetteFilter: I've received an awful wedding gift from a couple of friends--a tchotchke so ugly and useless it makes me reconsider my opinion of the givers (worse yet, I know for a fact that it isn't a re-gift).

Any tips on a nicely worded thank-you note?

What's a good 'thank you' gift for a couple of vegans?

bondcliff — Mon, 12 Jul 2004 07:31:52 -0800

What's a good 'thank you' gift for a couple of vegans? They're helping take care of my son over the next few days (so I'm pretty sure they wont eat him...) and I'd like to get them something, possibly a gift basket with some treats in it. They're not militant Animal Liberation Front vegans, they do it for health reasons and occasionally cheat, so it's probably ok if a cow once cast his shadow on the chic peas that the humus was made from, but obviously I'd like the gift to respect their diet. In addition to being vegan they avoid refined sugar and white flour and I'm pretty sure they're also avoiding alcohol.

I was thinking of some fruit from Harry and David but I think I'd like to get them more of a full meal or a dessert. I want to give it to them Wednesday morning, so mail order is probably out. My time is limited or else I'd bake them a loaf of wheat bread. I make a kick-ass cheesecake but, well, that's like vegan kryptonite. I'd not feel confident making a vegan one, if that's even possible.

So... gifty food treats I could pick up at the local HippieFoods(tm) grocery store or elsewhere? This sort of diet is totally alien to me. I admit to being completely ignorant.

Gift for Heart Surgeon

onlyconnect — Mon, 01 Mar 2004 23:15:19 -0800

My family would really like to send a thank you gift to the heart surgeon who operated on my father. First, this is okay to do, right? And second, if yes, what would a married doctor with kids like to get? I've spent 2 hours looking at gift baskets, but many are for sweet foods and (1) I think he practices Lent; and (2) he just lost a bunch of weight. I may go with a healthy (sort of) food basket, but can anyone recommend something else, maybe unrelated to food, that I'm overlooking? Other than a heart gelatin mold? Like a Netflix membership, except I'm not sure he doesn't already have one.