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is this bait and switch or what

Anonymous — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 17:42:46 -0800

I bought a new car. I love it. I negotiated a deal that is fair and that I'm happy with. The dealership just called me and said they can't find financing at the terms we agreed to, and now I have to give the car back or renegotiate the terms. Can this be legal?! I went into a dealership on Saturday night and made a deal on a car I love. I have had poor credit for a while, it turns out that it's been so long that I've had credit that I now have no FICO score at all.

Now the dealership has called me and told me they can't actually get financing at the terms we agreed to, and we need to renegotiate for more money down and a shorter term. This is unacceptable to me, I already put a hefty chunk of money down. This seems like typical bait and switch to me. We signed a contract -- it's not like I have the right to suddenly say that the terms we agreed to were not going to work for ME.

What are my options here? Has this ever happened to anybody here? Is this even legal?

Help Me Get Things Done

parmanparman — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 08:21:26 -0800

I love taking risk-taking. I am bold, tenacious, speak my mind and if you've met me you would know that I get a certain thrill out of it. Increasingly, I am finding myself wanting for ways to channel my love of risk into the energy I need to get things done. Please help me do this. In almost every aspect of my life, I can say with honesty that I take advantage of my love of being challenged. In work, I have moved from difficult position to difficult position looking for ways to create better enterprises but have been happy with my work in general.

I fear I am unable to put real strength into overcoming certain obstacles that are "New Beginnings". I want to take the GRE and finish my MA; I want to become a leader at work instead of just being the "Idea Guy who is good at building relationships"; I need to show that I can implement my own good ideas and be a capable ally to others. I am not following up all of the projects and people like I need to be doing and it's bad for me.

I ordered "How to Lead When You are Not in Charge" and "Inside the Millionaire Mind" but I would like to especially hear from creative people who decided they needed to get moving on things and found ways to be constructive, please people and most importantly please themselves. Any other help, links, or ideas would be greatly appreciated.

The steps I am taking now are:
1. Knowing I cannot please everyone.
2. Being aware of when I might overstep my station.
3. Taking care with information I have gathered.

diSposal

LSK — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 16:21:55 -0800

Disposing of an iTunes gift card (without using it) I got a $25 iTunes card for a Chanukah present. As it turns out, this is a pretty crummy present for anyone who's been following the digital rights movement. I'm looking for some way to get rid of it without offending the giver. I already tried selling it on Kingdom of Loathing for in-game goods - I was told by a moderator that doing so was verboten. How would you get rid of an iTunes card?

Should i give him one more chance?

Waterbear — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 12:00:22 -0800

To get back together or not to get back together....that is the question....(of course it's a lot messier than that.........) Was with my bf for 4 years (i'm 31 now and he is 32). Most of that time, besides maybe the first 6-months of honeymoon period, were not good. We fought all the time, mostly about the fact that he was completely and utterly emotionally unavailable. He would go days without calling or talking to me, then be angry and distant when i got upset about it, and/or call me 'needy' (which i know now i most definetely am not). He rarely showed me any type of love (asides from sex, which was always fantastic), and never wanted to talk about anything. In fact, whenever I tried to bring up the fact that I was really miserable and we needed to do something about it he would get angry and a fight would start. After much convincing, he came to a couples therapist with me and sat like a stone through the 3 sessions we went to. After a while I got sick of trying to convince him to go and we stopped. The therapist told me that basically i would be miserable with him b/c he was not willing to change, and had a lot of work to do and a lot to face up to, and to leave him.

We spent 4 years together (including 1 year living together in Japan during which time we were VERY isolated from family, friends, etc), and although we were close for a time, i never felt emotionally intimate with him, I always felt that if i left him he wouldn't care at all. We broke up briefly in 2006, but he begged me back, saying he had changed, and I gave him a 2nd chance only to have him act even worse. Finally i ended things with him last May (2007). He was devastated (but he acted that way everytime I attempted to end things with him).

I met someone else really quickly because, to me, the relationship had already been over for a long time and i'd been waiting for the right time to end it, where i felt strong enough that i could resist his repeated attempts to get me back.

The new guy is one of the nicest, best guys i've ever met, we have fun together, good sex, laugh and laugh, AND I feel so close to him.

THe problem is that lately i started talking to my ex again (he got a job at teh large company where i work after we broke up...i run into him now and then). He says he's been in counselling for the past year to work on all of his issues, and I even went to the therapist that he's been seeing with him, I know for sure he's been going and he seems to have made a lot of progress. I have such a strong attraction to him, and all of our history together...i find myself wondering if I should give him a (third) chance since he really seems like he's changed this time. He says he loves me and i'm the one for him and he will never hurt me again and all the rest. And i'm actually considering it. I've told my current bf that i'm having feelings for my ex, but he doesn't know to what extent i've been considering getting back with him. Now I feel like a total horrible witch for what i'm doing to my current bf. and I feel so torn and confused about whether to get back with the ex, has he *really* changed, etc. I know people say "follow your heart" but my heart doesn't seem to know what the eff it wants!

Has anyone ever been in a similiar situation? Do you think people can really, truly change? I'm so torn right now, not eating or sleeping, any advice would really help.....

Thanks.....

The Houston Social Scene

isoman2kx — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 15:44:03 -0800

Best non-alcoholic social events in Houston? I'm looking to ease back into the dating scene and I've looked a bit on sites like Upcoming.org/The Houston Press for some social events. I'm going to be 22 next month, so places that are 21 and up aren't an issue. The only real issue is alcohol, since I'm on anti-depressants and can't have much (technically "any") alcohol. Now I come to metafilter.com in hopes that my fellow Houstonian MeFites will point me in the right direction so that I can get a chance to meet new people without going to a hyped up club, trashy bar, political rallies, car shows, etc.

Thanks for any help,

-Travis

Fighting Blubber—The Gym Reassurance Questions.

wildrain2008 — Sun, 20 Apr 2008 08:06:36 -0800

Fighting Blubber—The Gym Reassurance Questions. INFORMATION:
=================

Background: So here's the deal, during late high school and early college I hit the gym on and off for a month or so, always breaking my routine and never getting the the exact point that I wanted to reach—which was getting cut like B. Lee but with a bit more mass.
After college work left me drained so even though I had time to hit the gym after.. I rarely did.

Negative Result: The result of not hitting the gym was not so much as getting overweight (I have a relatively fast metabolism) but rather the addition of blubber... that fat over the 6 pack and the love handles and especially Gluteus Maximus.

Resolution: After a year I switched jobs (on my new job 5 months now) and I've forced myself to get back into shape—watching my diet and resurrecting my gym routine. My current weight is 190lbs, I guess that's not so bad for a guy who's 5'11. But there's definitely has room for improvement from what I've read.

The Stalling: So I've been hitting the gym 3 days a week for almost 2 months now. My routine involves 30 mins of jogging or stationary bike, followed by 45 mins to an hour of weight lifting.

Weightlifting Routine breakdown:

Bench Press: 3 sets/ min 127lbs max 157lbs
Lat Pull Down: 3 sets/ min 90lbs max 100lbs
Sitting Bicep Curl: 3 sets/ 22.5lbs
Tricep Pull Down: 3 sets/ 40lbs
Dumbell Shoulder Press: 3 sets/ 30lbs
Butterfly: 3 sets/ 110lbs
Shoulder Machine: 3 sets/ 70lbs
Glutes Leg Press: 3 sets/ 260lbs
Abb Death Circuit: 3 sets of: hard medicine Ball leg lift, large medicin ball crunches (lying on top), standing oblique lifts (45lbs each side)

Positive Results: I've noticed definition on my body in general and the showing of the 3pack lol upper abbs.

Again my goal still remains to: to get cut up but have a bit more mass than just the average kung-fu fighter lol.

QUESTIONS:
=============

I know that 2 months at the gym is a short time for me to expect major results, but I would really love to get rid of the blubber that is still covering the results that I'm trying so hard to improve (aka the muscles and the tone that is slowly appearing.. again very slowly lol).

1. How many moths do I have to wait to see substantial results aka the evaporation of this darn flab?

2. Is there anything I can do to improve the weight loss but not damage my other goal (building mass)?

3. My brother after a year of swimming completely transformed his body, would adding maybe 1 or 2 days of pool to my overall routine damage or improve the results I'm striving towards?

END NOTES:
============
I told myself this time that I'm never quiting gym again.. and it looks like I've caught the gym bug as I get antsy (like an addict) towards the end of my work.. to get back into the gym.. :)

Andy advice is always helpful.

two introverts and a baby

Anonymous — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 13:51:20 -0800

My husband and I are expecting our first child - we are older, fairly introverted, no extended family nearby, and most of our friends either have older, not-very-dependent children, or are childfree. We don't belong to a church or synagogue (and won't be joining one) and our neighborhood is secluded and full of older folks who we don't really interact with much. I have a very real fear that I will be isolated once I have this child and stay at home with it - a friend of mine said "don't expect to find a fun time at Gymboree - those mothers are bitches!" So there goes that. Has anyone else overcome their introvert tendencies once they reproduce? If at all possible, I want my baby to get out in the world more than I usually do. I'm intimidated by the hot young moms I see with their babies in slings around town - I don't think I would have much in common with them.

Song lyric - "Getting Down to Business"

zachlipton — Sat, 11 Mar 2006 18:45:46 -0800

SongLyricsFilter: First line (and refrain throughout the song, I believe) is "Getting down to business." Sounds vaguely 70ish with a sort of pump-up beat. Google is getting me nowhere. Any ideas you may have are much appreciated.

Getting Things Done on a Macintosh

jdroth — Fri, 20 May 2005 08:43:42 -0800

Having recently finished Getting Things Done (and after following 43 Folders for some time), I'm inspired to organize my life. I've gathered supplies and plan to organize my physical life this weekend. My on-line life (based on a Mac) needs help, though. How do you stay organized on your Mac? Do you use iCal? (It still seems so buggy to me.) What e-mail program do you use? Is Microsoft's Entourage all that? I know about Quicksilver, but can you recommend other little apps to keep my digital life organized and worry free? (Tips on physical GTD organization are welcome, too.)

arrival of the New Yorker

_sirmissalot_ — Wed, 15 Dec 2004 16:06:42 -0800

New Yorker subscribers: When do you get your issue? (+) Since we moved to California, they come about a week slower than when we were out East. For instance, I haven't received the new double fiction issue yet, but I know it's out because other people are talking about it.

I don't know whether to blame Conde Naste, the post office, or my neighbor, whom I sometimes suspect "borrows" it from our communal mailbox.