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65 posts tagged with gay and lesbian. (View popular tags)
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I'm PRETTY sure I'm gay. Help me be okay with it.

I've always known I was a little different. I have trouble remembering things from my relatively normal childhood, so it took until high school to connect the few dots I had, but after I did that, I relished in the attraction I felt for certain other men. It was exciting and made me feel as though I was part of a community with a common story. I grew up with conservative parents who I haven't been able to tell but who I suspect have an inkling, given the things they found left open on my teenage computer and my shy, sensitive nature. I was fine with not making it a part of my identity and limited its sphere of influence to my taste in porn and online friendships. I never felt the need for a relationship- with women or men- but I enjoyed the way validation from "manly" men made me feel both emotionally and physically. [more inside]
posted by marsbar77 on Jun 26, 2014 - 29 answers

I know they're nice, but they're not for me!

I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone I've known for over two years, and we've been dating for a year-ish. We're both women in our early 20's. I've only dated women up to this point, and been very happy with that. It seems that my brain doesn't want to keep that status quo anymore and is trying to convince me I want to experience being with men. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 6, 2013 - 10 answers

I'm 45, female and just discovered I'm bi. Now what?

I'm 45, female and just discovered I'm bi. Now what? Yes, I know it seems unlikely, and the nearest I can figure is my arousal/desire for every single one of my lovers has occurred after being desired, rather than finding someone hot in advance. I was married for a very long time, and possibly oblivious to any gay come-ons, in my premarital time. For the sake of the information I seek, can we please assume that I am correct - that I am bi, and that this wasn't just experimental? (which has been suggested to me by a straight friend). [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 25, 2013 - 23 answers

Playing my part in making life for fellow LGBT countryfolk bearable.

The State-sanctioned homophobia and transphobia in Malaysia, my country of origin, is breaking my heart. What can I do as a currently overseas citizen to make things better for my fellow LGBT folk back in Malaysia, particularly in raising awareness of the issue internationally? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Mar 5, 2013 - 5 answers

How do I get the girl?!

Help me navigate my way through dating in my twenties and escaping the perpetual friend zoning: lesbian edition. Long story with links to my dating profiles for critiquing. [more inside]
posted by HiphopAnonymous on Nov 12, 2012 - 19 answers

Moving to Austin. What next?

My partner and I plan to move to Austin, Texas, in January. We’re looking for recommendations about neighborhoods, information about the housing market, or any other useful information. [more inside]
posted by maurreen on Oct 9, 2012 - 6 answers

Should I try to start an LGBTQ organization at my middle school?

Should I try to start an LGBTQ organization at my middle school? How? [more inside]
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl on Sep 19, 2012 - 32 answers

How have gay men interacted with and regarded lesbians, and vice versa

Would like insight and education into the various ways that gay men -- both as individuals and as a group, both historically and currently -- relate to, regard, and interact with gay/lesbian women, and vice versa. [more inside]
posted by jjjjjjjijjjjjjj on Aug 29, 2012 - 8 answers

Who's your favourite butch dyke?

Help me compiling a list of well known butch dykes [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Jul 26, 2012 - 31 answers

No, no, I'm not attracted to women! I just find women attractive!

Mid-20s, female, sort of starting to wonder if I might maybe be bi, kind of hating on myself over it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 10, 2012 - 38 answers

How to work in/move to a gay supportive country where same-sex marriage is legal?

I'm looking to work in/maybe move to, a country where same-sex marriage is legal and gay people are treated equally. Any recommendations? Any advice from expatriates? I've been in a committed and loving relationship with my partner for over 6 years. Looking forward, I would like to move to a country where I can get married, live, work, raise a family and be openly gay in a country with as much respect from the law and the community as everyone else. [more inside]
posted by Firegal on Jun 18, 2012 - 35 answers

Crush Hooked Up With Someone Else

First things first: I am a gay female. I have had a crush on my friend for several months (also a gay female), however, being inexperienced at making first moves and being shy, I have been moving very slowly. I thought perhaps she felt something for me, but never made any overt moves. Recently she drunkenly hooked up with another girl (whom she had just recently met within the last 2 weeks and this was only the second or third day they had really hung out together) at a party. I am wondering if I have completely missed my chance, and what I should do. [more inside]
posted by christiehawk on May 19, 2012 - 22 answers

What are the ways we could expand services and support available to LGBT young people online?

What are the ways we could expand services and support available to LGBT young people online? [more inside]
posted by Kirn on May 2, 2012 - 7 answers

Two lesbians eating out (in restaurants) – how to get good service.

What are some ways my partner and I (two women) can signal to restaurant staff that we are on a date and hope to receive service similar to straight couples? [more inside]
posted by tr0ubley on Mar 5, 2012 - 25 answers

As a gay woman, when is it okay to pursue a straight woman?

I am a gay female in my late 20s who has understood my own sexuality for as long as I can remember and has been out to all of my friends for many years. My orientation is certainly not anything I would consider a defining characteristic about myself. The kind of profession I am in, the kind of experiences I have had and my life goals have greatly shaped who I am as a person, and have absolutely nothing to do with who I am attracted to. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 20, 2011 - 42 answers

Flexible, customizable, free, gay-friendly, Windows-compatible genealogy software?

Flexible, customizable, free, gay-friendly, Windows-compatible genealogy software? [more inside]
posted by pracowity on Nov 3, 2011 - 5 answers

Gay Girl in Amsterdam for 2 Days: Where to stay and what to do???

Where should I stay in Amsterdam and what should I check out? I'm going to Amsterdam for two days and two nights the first week of January. I am a 26 year old single lesbian who is very interested in checking out the local hotspots for gay women and also visiting some art galleries. I would like to see some unusual art installations and/or performance art while I am there. Thank you! : ) [more inside]
posted by thatgirl1985 on Oct 24, 2011 - 6 answers

What are some cool queer events in Paris?

What are some lesbian/queer events, gallery exhibitions, movies, bars, etc. to see in Paris? [more inside]
posted by msk1985 on Oct 7, 2011 - 2 answers

Straight girl, but scared of boys

I'm a straight female, I think, but I'm terrified of dicks. And for the past few months, I've been wondering if I'm gay, but the thought scares me. (NSFW) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 25, 2011 - 43 answers

Oh no, I see a darkness. Oh no, I see a darkness. Oh no, I see a darkness.

The parents kicked me out for being gay. What can I do now to make sure I stay emotionally healthy, and how do I deal with my complicated feelings surrounding this? Has anyone else been through this? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on Aug 24, 2011 - 69 answers

Good LGBT blogs and websites?

I'm looking for some good blogs and sites related to LGBT issues [more inside]
posted by nickhb on Aug 10, 2011 - 11 answers

Will we get heckled if we kiss at the Ara Pacis?

How gay-friendly are Rome, Naples, and Capua? [more inside]
posted by yomimono on May 10, 2011 - 2 answers

Same-sex Split

My same-sex partner and I have separated (to my shock and opposition) after a few years of hard financial times. While I am holding out hope that she will come to her senses, I need help deciding on what to do (especially regarding our house) in case we can't resolve our issues. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 28, 2011 - 9 answers

Have you ever successfully fought for a relationship that you knew was worth saving? How did it work out?

Have you ever successfully fought for a relationship that you knew was worth saving? How did it work out? [more inside]
posted by newlyminted on Apr 28, 2011 - 24 answers

Exotic => Erotic

Soc-Psych-filter! Do people become gay or lesbian because they grow up feeling that stereotypically straight-acting kids are "exotic" -- as per the "Exotic Becomes Erotic" theory? [more inside]
posted by dontjumplarry on Apr 21, 2011 - 27 answers

What is the name of this Romance language polymory film?

Foreign Movie Filter: I need help remembering the name of a movie I saw at the Verzaubert festival in Berlin in November 2006. I know that it involved a wedding where the Bride did not show up and it ended with 5 people living in a polymorous relationship. Massive details below the fold. [more inside]
posted by Nackt on Mar 19, 2011 - 5 answers

Sex Ed Resources for Lesbians

My little sister is a lesbian, and seems misinformed about some basic sexual concepts (eg: safe sex for lesbians) .... [more inside]
posted by starfyr on Mar 14, 2011 - 46 answers

Books for unaccepting parents

Please help me compile a list of PFLAG-style books for someone. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2011 - 6 answers

Gay for a day?

I consider myself straight, but am interested in having sex with a girl just to see what it's like. I am under the impression that lesbians are not big fans of people like me. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 7, 2011 - 21 answers

Not as hard as coming out, but still not easy

[Queer-filter] How do you cope with the ambient heterosexism of everyday life? [more inside]
posted by zahava on Jan 27, 2011 - 33 answers

Gender nonconformity and sexuality

How strong is the correlation between non gender conformity and homosexuality? [more inside]
posted by antgly on Dec 1, 2010 - 32 answers

Merry Christmas, sorry I'm gay!

How can I come out to my extended family without it being a holiday "surprise" or confessional atmosphere? [more inside]
posted by nakedmolerats on Nov 20, 2010 - 22 answers

LGBT scene in the Twin Cities for a woman in her 30s

Woman in early 30s coming out as a lesbian for the first time in the Twin Cities. What's the city LGBT scene like? (Asking for a friend.) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 18, 2010 - 5 answers

Tell me more about my gay genes!

So I'm gay. Turns out a lot of folks in my extended family are as well. What are the odds? Has anyone studied extended family charting specifically? [more inside]
posted by Tchad on Aug 30, 2010 - 11 answers

Where to meet ladies who like other ladies in the Windy City

GetMeTheHellOutOfTheHouseFilter: I need to get out badly, I need a temporary escape from the insanity I'm in right now. My fantasy? To go somewhere and be straight up hit on by a lady (who likes other ladies (who are butch-ish (as in I will not be seen in pink ever, but can't fix my own car))). And this needs to happen in Chicago. Please help!!! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 7, 2010 - 10 answers

Queer Homelessness

Resources for a now-homeless-after-coming-out lesbian living in Fayette County, Ohio? [more inside]
posted by greekphilosophy on Jun 3, 2010 - 15 answers

Gender-bending Song Covers

I need examples of gender-specific songs covered by singers of the opposite gender. For instance, Jack White's cover of Dolly Parton's "Jolene". [more inside]
posted by domo on Apr 19, 2010 - 114 answers

Engaging young gay adults in the criminal justice system.

How do I more effectively encourage gay young adults in the criminal justice system to engage with the larger gay community? (long question) [more inside]
posted by The Straightener on Dec 8, 2009 - 39 answers

Who are our Pansexual Icons?

There are gay icons and lesbian icons - are there people who are bisexual/pansexual icons? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Sep 15, 2009 - 47 answers

Can I complain about a doctor online?

I had an absolutely terrible incident with a homophobic doctor. I have taken all the steps to report him to the local College of Physicians and Surgeons, and I hope he gets disciplined, but that doesn't address the systemic problem of homophobia in family physicians in my area (and it doesn't help me find a less homophobic doctor to switch to). I would like to blog about the incident, contact gay and lesbian associations, etc, but I am worried about being sued for libel/slander/I don't know. Will I get in trouble if I write publicly about this incident? Can I use the Dr's name? I'm in Alberta, Canada.
posted by arcticwoman on Sep 11, 2009 - 25 answers

Not gay, or at least, probably not.

I'm straight, but I've been seeing this girl. She's beautiful and a socialite and I've been feeling conflicted about being seen in public together. More inside... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 13, 2009 - 32 answers

Eastern Shore destinations?

Can you recommend a nice/interesting place for a weekend away on Maryland's Eastern Shore or thereabouts? [more inside]
posted by Morrigan on May 1, 2009 - 7 answers

What should I do about being involuntarily outed at work?

I'm about to be involuntarily outed as a bisexual at work. What should I expect? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2009 - 25 answers

Notable Gay Women in the LGBT Rights Movement?

Where are the lesbians in the history of the Gay Rights Movement? [more inside]
posted by crossoverman on Feb 1, 2009 - 20 answers

How do married same-sex couples hold title?

How do married same-sex couples hold title? Any recommendations or resources for California same-sex unions wanting to change title to their property? [more inside]
posted by Graygorey on Nov 13, 2008 - 4 answers

Why do straights use the word "partner"?

I want to know more about the use of the word "partner," especially for straight couples... [more inside]
posted by iliketolaughalot on Sep 22, 2008 - 68 answers

Where do you find good masculine clothing--for women?

What does the "futch" woman wear to Vegas? And where does she find her clothing? If I'm not feeling the nine-inch heels, where can I find the clothing that will be appropriate for a night on the town and fit butch-leaning tastes? [more inside]
posted by schroedinger on Jul 15, 2008 - 14 answers

Girls don't want to have fun?

Why are there so few lesbian bars in the NYC/Brooklyn area when compared to the high number of gay bars? [more inside]
posted by Viola on Jun 19, 2008 - 31 answers

Yar! Bare yer booty, wench!

Sexyfilter: Lesbian role-play ideas, bonus points for kinky. Yes, really. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 27, 2008 - 12 answers

I think I'm straight. Now what?

After a long time in a lesbian relationship, I'm coming to the realization that I think I'm straight. I don't want to leave my wife (I really love her), but I can't stop thinking about men. Please help me figure this out. Sexually explicit details inside. NSFW [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 21, 2008 - 23 answers

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