102 posts tagged with friends and resolved.
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I need to break up with a friend. How? What to say (or not say)?

I'm reluctantly coming to the realization that I feel uncomfortable with a longterm friendship. Due to how frequently we spend time together, I don't feel slow-fading is an option (although I'm happy to be proven wrong). How do I approach this? Should I state my reasons for wanting to end the friendship? Is it even reasonable or kind to do so? [more inside]
posted by Sudo on Aug 23, 2016 - 26 answers

What to do about insecure friend

My friend thinks several of our mutual friends hate her. This is not true, but she is convinced that it is. She has taken to lashing out at me if I spend time with any of these people without her. [more inside]
posted by crunchy_cereals on Aug 22, 2016 - 32 answers

What have I done to my neighbors and how can I fix it?

I accidentally created an uncomfortable living space for people I care about. I don't know how to mitigate this like a grown up; I suspect I've been using junior high level tactics. [more inside]
posted by The Noble Goofy Elk on Jul 4, 2016 - 22 answers

How do you "be there" for someone that pushes people away?

A friend of mine is pushing people away that he doesn't see on a regular basis. How do i let him know i'm around and i care? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Jun 21, 2016 - 12 answers

How to cut out the pretension and make new friends.

I'm currently 26. Mentally capable, polite, reserved, and forthright. And most everyone bugs the fuck out of me. I'd like to not experience that! [more inside]
posted by Philipschall on Jun 12, 2016 - 81 answers

Bar/Restaurant Alternatives for Changing Lifestyles?

We're segueing out of our hard-livin' days, and are finding it difficult to think of ways to be out and about, around other people, that don't involve drinking or eating. Where do you go to get your socializing fix? [more inside]
posted by stellaluna on May 10, 2016 - 20 answers

How do I fix my life?

I am about to graduate college with a business degree, a mediocre gpa, and very little experience. I have not made a single friend in college or been in a relationship. I lived with my parents for the whole entire time in college and they expect me to be married before leaving the house. I tend to succumb to extreme laziness and procrastination. I can spend 8 hours daily on the internet instead of doing homework. This procrastination has seeped into my job search. Am I ever going to be prepared for life? [more inside]
posted by sheepishchiffon on Apr 26, 2016 - 15 answers

Moving to England with kids - yay or nay?

An old friend has asked my advice on moving to the UK from Denmark. I really struggle with what to tell her. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by kariebookish on Apr 18, 2016 - 19 answers

How best to support my friend?

A friend of my close friend took his own life a couple of nights ago. My friend is pretty wrecked. What's the best way for me to support him? [more inside]
posted by holborne on Mar 9, 2016 - 19 answers

Nice person, nasty friends

When I lived in City I wanted to be friends with the members of Group. I tried but I find making friends really hard so I ran into troubles - got bullied by one and the others were indifferent to me, except for one who was my friend. I have lived abroad for the last few years and not really kept in touch (except for Facebook with a couple of them) . Now I am looking at jobs near to City... [more inside]
posted by EatMyHat on Feb 15, 2016 - 10 answers

How do I find out how this person feels about me?

I am confused about how someone is feeling towards me, and don't know how to get out of this ambiguous situation, but desperately need to. Please help. [more inside]
posted by muppets on Feb 12, 2016 - 25 answers

Deciding whether to resume contact with an estranged friend

My childhood best friend decided to marry her partner of 20 years five weeks after my former partner committed suicide. I attended the reception but it was very hard for me. I haven’t spoken to her since. Today I got a Christmas card from her mother, and it stirred up some feelings I haven't been able to reconcile yet. [more inside]
posted by cardinality on Dec 19, 2015 - 28 answers

Hello awkwardness my old friend

I've recently moved back to my hometown, 20 years after graduating high school. I'm apprehensive about running into old classmates. Angst within. [more inside]
posted by Elly Vortex on Oct 3, 2015 - 26 answers

Is it possible for us to be friends?

Can we still continue talking every once in awhile and be friends sort of? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Aug 13, 2015 - 27 answers

Where did you meet your 5-7 closest friends? How often do you see them?

I moved to a new city about 2.5 years ago and, aside from a few friendships that quickly faded by the 6-month mark, still have not made any friends. I don't want advice on where I should meet friends -- I want to know how you (i.e. people ~25-35 years old who are out of school and have been in the "real world" for a few years) have met the people you currently consider your closest friends. I want to have a better idea of how people ACTUALLY met the people they spend the most time with, how often they see them, and how many people they would consider friends. [more inside]
posted by Penguin48 on Jun 16, 2015 - 49 answers

You CAN sit with us.

Growing up, my family moved every few years and I was constantly a "new kid" navigating unfamiliar social situations. Although as an adult I now have many great friendships, I have an almost compulsive desire to be inclusive and not exclude others. I have a pattern of befriending people who say they are lonely and then feeling responsible for making them not feel lonely. How can I be compassionate to lonely people without reliving my childhood anxiety? [more inside]
posted by rogerrogerwhatsyourrvectorvicto on Feb 20, 2015 - 13 answers

affectionate videos for a toddler

I'd like to show my toddler videos/tv shows/movies/books that include genuine affection - parents, families, friends all giving hugs or smiles or other close, positive interactions. Any good ideas? [more inside]
posted by jillithd on Jan 16, 2015 - 18 answers

How to keep people informed by web/email about my father's illness?

We are looking for a good way to keep people informed about my dad's cancer treatment. Specifically: I'd like to be able to write posts that are visible on a blog or site of some sort, but that can also be sent to a couple dozen friends and family members by email. I looked at caringbridge, but it looks like there's no way to automatically sign people up to get email updates: They have to sign in and set their notification options, which seems more complicated that we'd like. [more inside]
posted by ManInSuit on Dec 21, 2014 - 11 answers

have I made a horrible mistake

I just moved to a new apartment in a different town and I hate it. Have I made a mistake? How do I cope and feel better about this? [more inside]
posted by thereemix on Dec 17, 2014 - 26 answers

Am i in the right here, or is what she did okay?

Me and my friend had been planning to go back to a convention since it ended in March. She invited someone else to stay with us in our room, i feel uncomfortable staying with someone i've never met, and i told her all this and even linked her to the hotels website. The rooms aren't cheap enough for him so she's telling me he's going to have to stay with us. Is this right? I don't know what else to do, i've already bought my tickets and my cosplay outfit. [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Oct 21, 2014 - 61 answers

Finding friends in Fresno?

My mother moved to Fresno 4 years ago, to be near her sister. She likes it here, more or less. However, she is 65, single, bored, and I have run out of suggestions. Can you help? [more inside]
posted by ananci on Sep 20, 2014 - 11 answers

Facebook friends lists: How do you compartmentalize your digital life?

I'm curious to hear how everyone organizes their Facebook friends lists, and how they figure out which posts/content to disclose to which parties. How do you use your lists? What is your system? [more inside]
posted by Hawk V on Aug 31, 2014 - 17 answers

Is it normal to miss an ex after 2 years?

I've noticed every so often (every few months?) i start thinking about my ex boyfriend i dated 2 years ago. Should i do anything about this? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Aug 25, 2014 - 17 answers

How to deal with friend that invites others along?

I have a friend i've known for almost 6 years now and recently we started taking weekend trips to a comic convention every March since we only see each other twice a year. She's invited someone she's friends with and her 3 year old daughter to come with us, i've never met her and i really don't want to spend my weekend with someone's fussy 3 year old. How do you handle something like this? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Jul 23, 2014 - 86 answers

Help me make my friends laugh... in less than 24 hours.

In about 24 hours I will be picking up old friends from the airport and taking them to a rented apartment in the city, near where I live. They will be tired and jet-lagged so I wanted to make their first day as hassle-free and pleasant as possible. At the same time, they have a goofy sense of humor and I would love to play a prank on them. Can you help me make them laugh? [more inside]
posted by M. on Jul 1, 2014 - 20 answers

I Feel Like I Won the House Lottery

How do I remain gracefully excited about the beautiful new home I'll be moving into? I've been gibbering insanely to anyone who asks, but I want to develop a solid library of tasteful adult answers that quietly acknowledge my good fortune but still channel my enthusiasm. [more inside]
posted by brisquette on Jun 27, 2014 - 24 answers

slow fade isn't working

I have a friend who I consider to be almost family. We used to be extremely close through middle and high school, and probably most of while I was in college. She had a really rough childhood that resulted in PTSD and lasting issues with relationships. Over the past few years our daily lives have become pretty different and I think as she's had less going on she's gotten harder to talk to. I've been trying the slow fade, but she's noticed and I have to figure out how much to explain. [more inside]
posted by sepviva on Jun 2, 2014 - 14 answers

Keeping friends in the loop?

Last night, while capping off a great day out, my girlfriend stumbled upon a big table crowded with friends she knew from before we met. It created a wave of sadness and nostalgia on her part that I could not do much about but listen. We go on several dates each month. I am working really hard to make our life more certain and rich but see clearly that I am not able to provide enough group experiences that my girlfriend would enjoy. I like to entertain but she is tired of always having everyone at our house. I can find lots of groups to join. I really want to ask her friends not to forget about us when they are going for a night out. What are some tactics I could use to do this?
posted by parmanparman on Dec 29, 2013 - 8 answers


How do you know when you've truly forgiven someone? How do you let go of old pain when you've long ago forgiven the person who caused it? Is it possible to truly forgive someone but still not want them in your life? [more inside]
posted by evil otto on Nov 30, 2013 - 21 answers

I would prefer not to spend time with my friend when she is very stoned

Is there any good way to tell a dear friend I don’t really want to chat on the phone or spend long periods of time with her when she’s very, very stoned? [more inside]
posted by JayAlfred on Nov 28, 2013 - 14 answers

Is this a normal thing when friends get a girlfriend?

I have a guy friend i've known since 1st grade (we're both 26), we went to school together all the way through high school. We had a kind of mutual unspoken, understanding/agreement over the years that we were friends, but we just didn't see each other often around school after a certain grade to be really good friends. Last year, we started talking a lot more on a pretty regular basis (about every day/night). [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Oct 3, 2013 - 20 answers

How to deal with this needy friend..

I don't mind making new friends, but it's when they have to contact me every day is where I cross the line. How can I handle this situation delicately? [more inside]
posted by Autumn89 on Sep 5, 2013 - 21 answers

Eeew, that's disgusting. Elementary school lunchtime social resilience.

How can I help my son to not feel embarrassed socially for having the healthy (and admittedly a little weird) lunches that I give him for school? [more inside]
posted by spbmp on Aug 27, 2013 - 65 answers

Peers in PDX

I'm moving across the country! What resources should I use to make friends in the Portland, OR area? More details inside... [more inside]
posted by cosmicbeast on Aug 14, 2013 - 12 answers

How much to pay a cat sitter?

I am going out of town for a few days, and have asked a friend to check in on my cat. How much should I pay her? [more inside]
posted by rainbowbrite on Jul 1, 2013 - 23 answers

This could be a sitcom plot...if it was actually funny.

One of three mutual friends of mine (who are all roommates) has been behaving very strangely and it is making things awkward. Should I address this or hope it goes away on its own? [more inside]
posted by bolognius maximus on Jun 23, 2013 - 19 answers

Friend bailed on plans, what should i tell her?

How do you deal with a friend that bails on plans? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Jun 16, 2013 - 31 answers

Set the bar...at what height exactly?

Recently I became friends with a group of people that lie and act in deceitful and unfair ways towards others - so I say, they apparently find it perfectly okay. Is it right to hold your friends to your own personal standards?
posted by travelwithcats on May 19, 2013 - 38 answers

Help me tell my BFF to shut up, in the nicest of ways.

My best friend is dating a new guy and is currently in the "floating in the clouds" stage. He's all that she talks about, texts me about, emails me about, mentions, quotes, you name it. I'm happy for her, but I am quickly reaching "who cares" stage. She does this with everyone she dates, but this guy might become permanent, so I'm not brushing it off as "just wait until this passes". How can I politely tell her that we need to have conversations about OTHER THINGS? She can be very sensitive, and I don't want her to feel that I am not interested in the relationship or not happy for her. More details inside. [more inside]
posted by ElectricGoat on Apr 28, 2013 - 26 answers

My friend is in love with another friend's sister?

tl;dr: Friend likes friend's sister. Friend is very socially awkward and sister is very scared of him for his "creepy" demeanor (according to her words) and the sister needs to know how to make him stop liking her. Ideas discussed include outright rejection, fake boyfriend, fake pictures, which I had mostly disagreed with, and need advice to sort this out. [more inside]
posted by JYuanZ on Apr 8, 2013 - 18 answers

How do I politely end a friendship that has gone down the rabbit hole?

My friend "Joe" and I have been friends on and off for over 7 years. - On and Off being key words - Recently a few things in the friendship were really inappropriate - details inside - and he has since stopped talking to me. During this time I have realized my life will be much more drama-free to end the friendship, but I would like to do so with the least drama, while still getting myself heard. [more inside]
posted by Crystalinne on Apr 6, 2013 - 40 answers

All your burned bridges are belong to me.

Fubar'd a friendship. Hope me. [more inside]
posted by mibo on Apr 1, 2013 - 21 answers

Am i over thinking things with him?

Am i over thinking things with him, are we friends? Acquaintances? People that talk on occasion? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Mar 15, 2013 - 21 answers

Ending a friendship over friend's unethical behavior?

I have realized recently that I have a few friends that behave in ways, in other areas of their life, that I think is unethical. How do you draw the line, when someone's behavior is not directly affecting you, on what is acceptable for your standards of friendship? [more inside]
posted by abirdinthehand on Feb 23, 2013 - 33 answers

Iceland For Foodies?

I'm planning a trip to Iceland, probably for May, and a friend has expressed interest in coming along. I'm a bit worried ... [more inside]
posted by like_a_friend on Jan 16, 2013 - 21 answers

Should i still go to the movies?

Friend invited someone else to hang out with us should i still go? [more inside]
posted by ohtimorousme on Dec 28, 2012 - 26 answers

How do I ensure things stay platonic, but friendly, with this guy?

I just got asked by email to meet for drinks by this guy in my Meetup group. He's a nice person, and I'd like to be friends. I have a boyfriend, and I don't think he knows this. How do I politely deflect? [more inside]
posted by iadacanavon on Dec 16, 2012 - 23 answers

How can I respond to questions I don't want to answer without hurting peoples' feelings?

After posting this question, I asked out a guy that I was interested in. It's going pretty great, except that my friends won't leave me the hell alone about it, and I want to think about something else! [more inside]
posted by windykites on Nov 25, 2012 - 8 answers

What to do about a friend who doesn't make time for me and other friends

What is this kind of behavior? I have a friend who constantly turns down invitations to do anything because she says her life is so busy. [more inside]
posted by spooky car on Nov 2, 2012 - 40 answers

How often do you talk about personal things?

How often do you talk about personal topics with friends, co-workers, etc...? [more inside]
posted by ohtimorousme on Oct 24, 2012 - 27 answers

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