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Making Friends and Dating in Madison, WI at Age 32

Hi all, I've gone through previous questions relating to live in Madison, and it looks like I'm far from the first person to feel like it's super hard to make friends or find dates here at age 32. Before I give up and move, which I am very much considering, I want to know if there are options I've overlooked as far as meeting people goes. [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe on Sep 12, 2014 - 15 answers

I think I'm really depressed , will therapy help?

When dealing with depression, what has worked for you . . medications, etc? I don't want to rely too heavily on friends for this, because I have in the past, and they tend to want to avoid you if you tend to talk about it too much. [more inside]
posted by jeepwrnglrwmn on Jul 11, 2014 - 17 answers

What do I do when okcupid intersects real life?

So, I was always terrified of this happening, but then I got over it. Well, it turns out I was right- eventually, if I stay on okcupid long enough, I'm going to hit the end of single men my age in my city. [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Apr 17, 2014 - 38 answers

I think I like-like him.

Are we friends? Are we dating? How do I find out without ruining everything? [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Apr 9, 2014 - 28 answers

How to take online dating slowly?

I'm a bisexual woman in my 20s, and I started online dating in January. I moved to a new country so I am totally content with meeting new people and learning more about the city through them. I also really enjoy just talking to new people in general without any expectations, but I wonder if can do something better so I can actually have something romantic? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 2, 2014 - 6 answers

I'm not interested in dating or being your friend. Thanks and goodbye.

How do I tell somebody I recently met that I'm not interested romantically or even as a friend? The problem is that I'm not exactly sure whether she is looking for just a friend or something more? [more inside]
posted by Che boludo! on Oct 22, 2013 - 24 answers

Is this a normal thing when friends get a girlfriend?

I have a guy friend i've known since 1st grade (we're both 26), we went to school together all the way through high school. We had a kind of mutual unspoken, understanding/agreement over the years that we were friends, but we just didn't see each other often around school after a certain grade to be really good friends. Last year, we started talking a lot more on a pretty regular basis (about every day/night). [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Oct 3, 2013 - 20 answers

Should this just be a nice memory?

A few weeks ago, my friend and I confessed our mutual feelings. Then we went our separate ways, and there were loose ends. How can I be clear about my intentions? Should I be? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 8, 2013 - 14 answers

Why do I always end up in the 'Friend Zone'?

This happens to me far too often when I've dated men, I hear the 'I like you as a friend' after a handful of dates far too often. Is there something I could be doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by bluehermit on Jun 11, 2013 - 33 answers

Are most guys' minds creepy (or sex sex sex? :/)

Incident report of a young woman and much older upper-middle class man. [more inside]
posted by MiuMiu on May 10, 2013 - 85 answers

Dating (and friendship): Screening for reliability

How do you screen for reliability and filter out self-centered/selfish nature in dating in real life and online dating? And, how do you find out whether a person (for dating or friendship) is a 'giver' or a 'taker'? By reliability and being a giver, I don't mean something as trivial as calling when they say they will. I mean more like being there for you when you are going through one or more major challenging life events, putting the relationship and "us" before individual interests especially when the going gets rough for you and not for them individually. Does this kind of reliability even exist among partners and can one really, truly, deeply trust another human being or do you feel you always have to watch your back even with a partner of months or years or decades?
posted by xm on May 7, 2013 - 20 answers

How do I ensure things stay platonic, but friendly, with this guy?

I just got asked by email to meet for drinks by this guy in my Meetup group. He's a nice person, and I'd like to be friends. I have a boyfriend, and I don't think he knows this. How do I politely deflect? [more inside]
posted by iadacanavon on Dec 16, 2012 - 23 answers

How can I turn him down without crushing him?

How can I avoid leading a guy on when he won't come out and state his attraction? [more inside]
posted by chocolatemilkshakes on Dec 14, 2012 - 28 answers

How do I handle a friend who is potentially messing up my love life?

My date canceled on me because he's best friends with a guy who is in love with me...even though I have absolutely no feelings for said friend and I've told him so. How do I handle this? [more inside]
posted by mlk915 on Dec 13, 2012 - 64 answers

Best friends are dating behind my back - how to deal?

I think my best friends are dating behind my back which hurts my feelings. To further complicate matters, I like one of the best friends in a romantic way and I don't know how to deal with the whole situation. Help!!! [more inside]
posted by cyml on Nov 25, 2012 - 25 answers

How can I respond to questions I don't want to answer without hurting peoples' feelings?

After posting this question, I asked out a guy that I was interested in. It's going pretty great, except that my friends won't leave me the hell alone about it, and I want to think about something else! [more inside]
posted by windykites on Nov 25, 2012 - 8 answers

how do i integrate myself into a brand new friend group?

how do i integrate myself into a brand new friend group? [more inside]
posted by humiliated_grape on Nov 5, 2012 - 17 answers

How do I help my friend find a boyfriend?

DatingFilter: What dating advice do I give to my friend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 19, 2012 - 12 answers

Friends of exes - always off limits?

Briefly dated someone - is his friend off limits? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 5, 2012 - 22 answers

Stretched too thin...help!

Overwhelmed with parenthood/work/life...how am I supposed to manage everything? Am I being selfish? [more inside]
posted by andariel on Sep 8, 2012 - 30 answers

What's a little friendly sexual competition amongst amigos?

How do I manage this potentially awkward social situation and win the girl? [more inside]
posted by Che boludo! on Sep 5, 2012 - 14 answers

Is it okay to renege on a date that you didn't know was a date?

Is it ever okay to renege on a date if you didn't know it was a date in the first place? [more inside]
posted by iLoveTheRain on Jul 2, 2012 - 55 answers

Being friends with a guy while dating

How do you balance out dating and being good friends with a guy? [more inside]
posted by ohtimorousme on Jun 15, 2012 - 13 answers

Can we stay this way?

How to thwart jealousy and possessiveness in a non-relationship relationship? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 14, 2012 - 23 answers

How to preserve my friendship with an ex now that I'm involved with a new person?

We dated for quite a while, but it didn't work out and we've ended up as good friends. But now I'm entering a serious relationship for the first time since it ended, and the shift in my attention seems to be rattling her. How can I handle this gracefully? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 12, 2012 - 39 answers

"You realize, of course, that we could never be friends."

From friends to dating: advice? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 5, 2012 - 11 answers

Me : Extrovert. She : Introvert. Can this relationship survive? Should it?

Me : Extrovert. She : Introvert. Can this relationship survive? Should it? [more inside]
posted by Sloop John B on Mar 28, 2012 - 67 answers

I have enough male friends.

Men love being my friend but not dating me. Am I doing something wrong? [more inside]
posted by unannihilated on Mar 18, 2012 - 48 answers

How do I get over myself and ask someone if they are interested?

I'm a great, funny guy. I'm decent looking. I end up friends with everyone I want to date because I don't want to be "that guy" and make them feel uncomfortable by making some stupid, awkward "move". Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by peripatetic007 on Mar 13, 2012 - 63 answers

Please tell me what to do next...

What's the next step in this relationship? Should I make a move? Why is this so confusing? [more inside]
posted by StrictlyVague on Mar 9, 2012 - 33 answers

How can my teenage son improve his dating/friend making skills?

How can my teenage son improve his dating/friend making skills? [more inside]
posted by hick57 on Feb 16, 2012 - 35 answers

Uncommon Courtesies

In the last Roderick on the Line, John says that he always gets a houseguest a glass of water, before they ask - because 9 times out of 10, someone always loves a glass of water. I love this idea. What are some low-key courtesies you extend or have had extended to you by friends, romantic partners, suitors, etc. that show someone you're thinking about their needs and general comfort? [more inside]
posted by Apropos of Something on Nov 28, 2011 - 55 answers

he really likes you, tubby!

Do I tell my partner his friend said something snarky? The brief: I have a fantastic bf who is everything I could ask for in a man. He's got a large circle which includes several female friends. One of them, he mentioned before I met her, is known for being funny, but generally inappropriate and uncouth (he gives pretty fair descriptions like this of everyone I've met, not singling her out). Met her a few times, and most recently she was very, very drunk. Can you guess where this is going? [more inside]
posted by OompaLoompa on Nov 2, 2011 - 47 answers

Check yes or no.

So my friend and I kissed. Now what? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 21, 2011 - 16 answers

Why do we go weeks without seeing each other? Are we just friends?

This guy is confusing me. He acts like he likes me but we sometimes don't see each other for a few weeks. [more inside]
posted by ohtimorousme on Jun 18, 2011 - 24 answers

Where to meet interesting 30-somethings in Boston?

Where to meet interesting 30-somethings in Boston? [more inside]
posted by AlmondEyes on Apr 26, 2011 - 12 answers

Is disliking a SO's friends a dealbreaker in a serious relationship?

Is disliking a SO's friends a dealbreaker in a serious relationship? (snowflake details inside) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 6, 2011 - 27 answers

Should I ask my roommate's permission to date her friend?

Should I ask my roommate's permission to date her friend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 15, 2011 - 14 answers

How do I stop being so jealous/protective/possessive of my female friend?

How do I stop being so jealous/protective/possessive of my female friend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2011 - 11 answers

Why don't I want friends?

It seems I don't have a lot of sustained interest in meeting new people or hanging out with people in general other than people I'm attracted to romantically/want to date. [more inside]
posted by clever anonymous username on Dec 19, 2010 - 11 answers

How to preserve healthy anger

Can I learn to hold a grudge? [more inside]
posted by peacheater on Dec 9, 2010 - 18 answers

I don't want to give up on people or myself: how do you deal with persistent impermanence?

After 15 years of disappointing dating, how do I hold on to my optimism and avoid apathy in my relations with others? [more inside]
posted by everydayanewday on Nov 15, 2010 - 17 answers

How About You Be My New Dating.... Friend?

How to become friends (not a romantic interest) with someone you just went on a date with through OkCupid? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 28, 2010 - 30 answers

Help me be a friend! Anyone's friend.

what is the secret to make people like you and call you back to hang out or to go on a second date? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 1, 2010 - 24 answers

Making friends in Melbourne

I'm an American guy in my mid-late twenties living in Melbourne, Australia for (at least) the next eight months. My social life was quite exciting when I first moved here during late summer, but lately it feels a bit stagnant at times. I'm looking for ideas of activities to get involved with, to make use of my free time and help me connect with new people (friends of both sexes, plus THE LADIES). [more inside]
posted by adamk on Jul 25, 2010 - 8 answers

Friends and lovahs?

Transitioning from friends to something more—good idea? How to do it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 1, 2010 - 6 answers

Dating a friends ex

I am dating the ex-boyfriend of a (distant) friend of mine. Do I need to tell her? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 22, 2010 - 14 answers

Should I date someone I'm not attracted to if the other option is never dating?

Should I date someone I'm not attracted to if the other option is never dating? I'm a girl. I went on a date with a boy I met on the internet, and it was pathetic. We talked about my mother, his mother, and lesbian movies I've seen. (Was that a bad subject for a first date? I'm inexperienced.) He was using open body language and I was using closed. I didn't realise this at the time. He was totally uninitiative and way too nice and I found that unappealing. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 6, 2010 - 32 answers

How to get from attraction to sleeping together without dating?

I seem to find myself in the same situation all the time - I'm friendly with a girl, and there seems to be a pretty clear sense of mutual attraction. But for whatever reason, I'm not really interested in dating them. Sometimes it's a shared interests thing - maybe there's one thing we have in common but share pretty much nothing else. Or maybe they're just really immature about some things. Or maybe they're someone I work tangentially with that it would be sorta inappropriate for me to date. Anyway, for me it seems like the attracted-to scale and the want-to-date scale are kind of independent. It's great when they line up, but often they don't. So how do I go about telling them that I'm attracted to them but don't really want to date? Or is that just totally unwanted? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 18, 2010 - 10 answers

From (v.early stage) dating to friends and all the way back - express ride to disaster or potential success?

From (v.early stage) dating to friends and all the way back - express ride to disaster or potential success? Am mostly curious to find out if anyone had similar experiences and can enlighten me [more inside]
posted by coffee_monster on Aug 2, 2009 - 3 answers

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