Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with fighting

My best friend and wife are fighting. Should I try and mediate or stay out of it?

washateria — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:29:36 -0800

My best friend and wife are fighting. Should I try and mediate or stay out of it? My best friend of ten years is a former boss we can call her FormerBoss/Mentor. FormerBoss/Mentor and I have a great deal of common interests and even though she can be a bit prickly we have always gotten along and enjoy each others company.

My wife of five years is a professional house painter and recently did some painting work for my FormerBoss/Mentor. The work was suppose to be only painting, but my FormerBoss/Mentor called my wife and asked her to supervise another person doing work in the house while she was there, be there to let in other workers, etc. This wasn’t part of the work but my wife did everything that was asked. There were also a couple of pictures left out to be hung and a smoke alarm to be installed with a note, saying “would you please…?” and those things were not part of the agreement and my wife did not do those things. During the week the job ended they were to see each other at an event on Friday evening and they established during a phone call that my wife was to get paid for the job that evening. That evening came and my FormerBoss/Mentor said nothing but “Sorry, I forgot my checkbook.”

No other discussion, no thank you for the work. My wife handed her the keys to her house. The next day they saw each other at another event and there was not any discussion of the work or how my wife was to be paid or any thank you for doing the work. On Sunday my girlfriend emailed my FormerBoss/Mentor and said she was hurt, she felt unacknowledged and unappreciated and wanted to know how she was going to get paid. My friend sent an email saying “I had no idea you should have said something I don’t carry my checkbook with me everyday”.

A few days later a check arrived in the mail. There was a housewarming party where my wife chose not to go because she was still really angry with my friend and I didn’t go because something deep inside told me that no matter what I should stand by my wife. My FormerBoss/Mentor called me on Monday and asked why I wasn’t there and I said because she needed to work out this issue with my wife. My friend says she has done nothing wrong and that she has been very good to my wife and my wife won’t accept her part in it, she never provided an invoice. My partner says this has nothing to do with money or an invoice it has to do with acknowledgement and that my FormerBoss/Mentor should have thanked her for the work and acknowledged the job she did, painting + many extras.

I am so upset that they are fighting like this. Should I call my FormerBoss/Mentor and ask her to please just say thank you for the work my wife did so this can be over? Should I try and stay out of it? Before this happened we were all very close almost like family. I think personally that my former boss was upset that my girlfriend didn’t do ALL the extra things she left out for her and that not saying thanks was a small passive aggressive dig at her. Any advice is appreciated. I really don't know if I should try and mediate or stay out of it. I feel as if my water dish has been moved very far away from my bowl. Any thoughts are appreciated.

Any Arabic-speaking, food-loving Puerto Rican Bando fans in DC?

metajc — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 08:30:07 -0800

Any advice for a friend moving to Washington, DC, who is an ex-Air Force Puerto Rican (kickboxing) fighter studying Arabic at Georgetown? Dude has very specific interests, doesn't drink. He asked me if there was an Arabic part of town where he could live. I don't think so, right? He loves Puerto Rican food but I don't know of any around here -- just Cuban? He's a fighter and probably capable of hiring on as a trainer somewhere, judging by his physique. Any fighting institutions he should look into? Is Bando still a thing in DC?

What iPhone apps are best to track my fitness prgress as I get back into shape?

chinese_fashion — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 14:12:06 -0800

What iPhone apps can I use to track and manage my fitness progress? I had surgery a few months ago, and am not ready to re-enter the gym. I am WAY out of shape, gained about 10 pounds. I go to a Muay Thai/Kickboxing gym, and have been given the all-clear from doctors and trainers alike to start working out there again.

I've also just gotten a new iPhone and would like to use an app or something to track my weight, diet, and workouts to move constructively towards getting fit. I feel like if I can see some incremental goals there, I'll stop focusing on feeling fat/out of breath all the time.

What apps do you recommend? I'm susceptible to "feature exhaustion," so simpler is better.

And any tips for losing weight and getting back on the horse after a long, medically-induced layoff are greatly appreciated as well.

Thanks!

Cat Grudge Match

murrey — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:08:23 -0800

After 3 months of trying to merge our cats into one household, should we just let our cats fight it out? Nothing else seems to have worked to peaceably introduce my cat into my husband's two cat home. Or should we wait until we move into our new home? I posted previously looking for insights into introducing my cat and problems we have been experiencing here. Nothing has worked other than to keep them separated.**

But we can't live with cat wrangling forever (I am having a baby in 2 months). My husband said we should just allow them to "work it out" and that my cat will find places to hide/escape/etc. Does this work? Will my smaller cat be traumatized or hurt (she seems fine immediately after these fights, emotionally and physically, so long as they are separated again). Has anyone just let them work it out on their own?

One side note...his cats definitely know my cat is in the house because she has been in all of the rooms (we rotate them) and we have had numerous supervised interactions. I think it might be a territory thing. Should we wait until we move into our new home 3 months from now where his cats don't feel so territorial?

How the heck do people have multi-cat households? Please help.

**I have now also tried Feliway for almost a month, but one of my husband's cats (female) always attacks my much smaller female cat. We can't tell, but his male cat seems interested and runs after my cat but doesn't seem as mean about it...more curiosity. My cat just runs away. I have also put bells on his cats to warn my cat of their presence and to hide.

Can I Polish Up My Martial Arts When I Can't Afford a Dojo?

snap_dragon — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 08:54:16 -0800

Is it possible to practice and brush up on martial arts? I can't afford a dojo and only have my wife to practice on (!!). I know...rather sad. But she is willing to learn so I teach her. Can I polish up my previous learning? I have 3 years in karate 2 years in small-circle jujitsu (wrist lock flowing techniques, and not the Brazilian stuff...which would be great, though)...and a smattering of Aikido. I am not looking to be Bruce Lee or the best cage fighter. I am wanting to perfect what I do know. Is it silly to watch youtube videos and books that I have (excellent reference by Marc Tedeschi etc) to refresh myself as well as practice teaching my wife? What are your thoughts on training in a vacuum if you will? If you have any training ideas or opinions I am open for your knowledge or criticism. I don't want to waste my time.

Recommend me some kickass fight scenes please!

ORthey — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 21:00:05 -0800

Recommend me some contemporary movies that have lengthy, intense, kickass fight scenes please! I just watched "Taken" and it has a really intense fight scene... it's not insanely long, but it's visceral and very exciting just the same. I realized that I love me a good fight scene! Another one that fits into the category for me was in the third Bourne film (Ultilmatum). They Live also has a legendary, ridiculously long fight scene.

Essentially, I'm looking for fights that make you gasp, and that are hair-on-end, sweaty palms, kick-you-in-the-ass awesome. So, please let me have 'em!

thems fightin' words

Anonymous — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 11:18:54 -0800

How do you & your SO stop big arguments before they start / if they've started, how do you calm down & make them stop? My SO & I are about to move in together and we’re just totally into each other. It's the sort of relationship we've both always wanted, and we've been together for a rad and loving eight months.

But our big, fiery and stubborn personalities mean our fights are of a Jerry-Springer level of intensity and drama. Normally, we’re quite good at talking things out, and are very gentle and considerate. But other moments, we just bristle at everything the other person says, and we can escalate almost anything to gigantic proportion.

Our query: have any of you have dealt with a similar trouble – have you fell in love with someone who’s as passionate/stubborn as you, and your fighting is Oscar-nomination worthy? & subquestions:
How do you deal with it?
What are your mechanisms for de-escalation?
How do you recover when you have a big-time clash?
How do you deal when each of you need different amounts of time to bounce back to normal?

Martial Arts for Outsiders

stonepharisee — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 14:02:31 -0800

I'd like to watch some classy martial arts bouts. Recommendations? I've looked through past posts on martial arts. Didn't find any that could yield the right video links or technical jargon that would allow me, an outsider, to look at a variety of martial arts. Ideally, I'd like to sample the best of many, visually, so I can start to see what they have in common, how that is all continuous with yoga, and such. But plenty of punching and slapping is fine too. So share your insider knowledge, please!

and its the little one that beats up on the big one

muscat — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 11:09:04 -0800

my poor cat filter... we have 2 cats, brothers rescued together as kittens. Fuzzy-man is insecure and jealous and really dislikes seeing his brother get attention. Also, he seems to attack his brother (handsome-man) to punish him for recieving affection! So now when I pet handsome-man he gets paranoid and looks around to see if there's an ambush on the way.

It's not like fuzzy-man is underloved in any way, he's just a greedy brat. I'm tired of my coming home to my other poor kitty cowering with bite marks all over his nose!

Please help me end the trauma for handsome-man.

Treaty of testicular disarmament? When? Was it universal?

Free word order! — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 13:40:12 -0800

Does anyone know about a past or present culture or subculture where it is acceptable to start or end a fair fight with a cockpunch? I'm wondering if cockpunch is indeed a (rare) universal taboo - in controlled male violence - and the idea is so funny because of that. I know that in martial arts, there are moves aiming for the maximum testicular damage, but they seem to be emphasizing martial life or death -situation. Most of the violence is strongly codified; so is there a culture where f.ex. good kick in the nuts is the aim, but bruising the face is out of the question?

Since much fighting happens between siblings, there could be some complex mathematical reasons where possibility of hurting your brother's genetic material is worse in the long term than cost of upholding the taboo. If there are traditions where low blow is acceptable and in use, then this theory can be put to rest.

Cat-astrophe

O9scar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 14:53:22 -0800

Cat conflict. As in fighting and spraying. Is there a way to broker a peace accord? We've had Sasha for a few years. My wife volunteers for the humane society and offered to foster for them. We were expecting dogs, but there's a huge amount of cats in this area, so that's what we've ended up fostering. Our cat was largely indifferent to 4 separate cats we brought into the house. One of the fosters (Maggie) ended up staying with us. They fought a few times, but ended up becoming friends.

Recently we found a lovable stray - or he found us, I suppose. We didn't introduce him gently to Sasha, which was probably a mistake. In any case, there have been a number of tense standoffs between them. He doesn't get along with Maggie either, but she's not overly confrontational. Eddie was intact when we found him, and got neutered as soon as we could arrange it.

Unfortunately besides fighting (mostly growling at each other) Sasha is now spraying. It's happened several times around the house. Once he was brazen enough to do it directly on my wife's shoulder.

We bought Feliway, which hasn't done a damn thing. Unless we made a huge mistake by plugging it in behind a small dresser (not the best layout of outlets in this house). I'd rather not get rid of Eddie, but if that's the only choice then we'll do it.

Oh, and just to make things even more insane, we're fostering a mom and three tiny kittens. Sasha has barely been inside the house since we don't trust him, so I don't actually know how he would deal with the additional interlopers.

I want us to get along

Anonymous — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 23:39:34 -0800

I want to have a normal sibling relationship with my youngest sister. How can I begin to do this? I am the oldest sibling in my family and a male child to boot. I have two younger sisters, one who is about a year younger and one who is four years younger.

The middle sister and I get along great. We meet up every weekend and talk about things. It's nice.

My youngest sister is a different story. She and I never got along in the past. She always felt like I got preferential treatment from our parents, and has never let that go. She's a party girl, I'm a homebody. We used to fight physically as kids, and in more passive aggressive ways now that we are adults.

About 10 years ago, I tried to bury the hatchet with my youngest sis. I tried to be more understanding of her. I tried to reach out and talk to her more. She didn't totally rebuff me, but I could tell the interest was not there as much as it was for me.

And so it has gone on since then. We're in a sort of detente. It's just that I'm not happy with this. I love my sister and am proud of her. She's done well for herself and I want her to be part of my life. We haven't talked directly or by e-mail since 2006. I get updates on her from mom and I assume she does the same.

I want to build a relationship with my youngest sis, but have no idea where to begin. It's hard to know how to undo a lifetime of damage.

Any hints from the hive mind? Any questions or private suggestions can be directed to anxiousbrother@gmail.com

Should I just pick up the phone and call?

Anonymous — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 18:01:11 -0800

Should I suck it up and extend an olive branch or wait for her to contact me? [Long, long post. Apologies] I have been friends with Jess* for 8 years now. We were very close after we left school and I had seen her through a few serious relationships, being disowned and kicked out, having her live with me and my family, being accepted back into her family, her brother and mother getting quite sick, her father getting extremely sick (as in, we all thought he would die), I helped her move to another state, supported her as she has broken up and got back together with her current boyfriend a number of times and I have also seen her start 3 different degrees at 3 different universities. Jess has lived interstate for 2 years now, with her boyfriend and, understandably our relationship (“best friends”) has changed, I was expecting it to change as she has James* and is wrapped up in him and their relationship. I should say I have two other friends I would say are “best friends” that also are close with Jess.

The problem:

I recently, with another of our close friends (Mel*), visited her at considerable expense. We went for a weekend and it was awful. We were made to feel like we were intruding on their weekend and when discussing plans Jess would get angry at us because we didn’t know what restaurant we wanted to go to for dinner / what activity we wanted to do. Nothing was planned. Also, Jess & James are so focused on each other that Mel and I basically spent all weekend just hanging out as the two of us. The three girls probably only spent a total of 3 hours, just us with Jess’ full attention, over the entire weekend as James had to be involved in everything we did. I had gone down to see my best friend, to spend time with HER not James and she was aware of this. You can probably appreciate how upset I would have become so I did what I usually do - I clammed up. I could have handled it better and I openly acknowledge that I am partly to blame for the situation our friendship is now in.

We talked about a week after the disastrous weekend and now, 3 months later, have only spoken about once. In the last 2 months, I haven’t heard from her at all. In our 1 conversation she accused me of being rude to James “you didn’t answer him when he spoke to you” which I would never do, I was a guest in his house, so was a little WTF? Another comment was “she was frustrated that we wouldn’t make any decisions, I’m not here to ‘entertain you’” which made me really, really angry. Whenever she visits we all make an effort to make plans or have something arranged. Also, she was our host in my eyes which means, yes, you have a small burden of planning at least dinner ahead of time.

Also that she “wanted us to get to know her and James as a couple” which I told her I thought should have been told to Mel and I beforehand, rather than us thinking we were going to get some quality time with her. I also, stupidly, after she told me she “wanted me to totally honest with her” told her that the only person I have any interest in is her and that forcing me to watch them be all over each other is not a good way to endear me to them as a couple. I know, I shouldn’t have said I don’t care about getting to know James but... it’s really how I feel.

I’m at a point where I am really sad that we aren’t talking but also angry that I seem to be heaped with all the blame for the outcome of the weekend – to the point that we aren’t talking anymore. I feel like the fact I’m not that wrapped in being “best friends” with her boyfriend shouldn’t be such an issue, we have never had that type of relationship where we have to be buddy-buddy with each others partner’s. I have been there for her for so many years, so many dramas (with very few of my own), that I feel angry that she would be so willing to throw it all away for something like this and that, once again, I’m the one that has to do something about it, fix it, etc. The friends we share say she has been sobbing down the phone to them about this… so why doesn’t she do something? Am I being spiteful by not calling her myself?

So… Should I suck it up and extend an olive branch or wait for her to contact me?

Throwaway email for any further questions is sadgirl@inbox.com

Thanks in advance for everyone who dispenses advice – MeFi is my favourite. *Fake names, of course.

Giving her the finger as I give her the ring

Anonymous — Sun, 25 May 2008 06:28:10 -0800

Now that I've decided to propose to my girlfriend, I suddenly seem to be picking fights with her. What's going on? I recently decided to propose to my girlfriend of 2+ years, and have been spending a fair amount of time and energy planning/shopping for it. I feel like there's been a corresponding increase in fighting since then. (Even now, we probably don't fight all that much, but relative to our baseline it seems like a lot.)

In part, I think I'm trying to test her, to make sure we're resilient enough. I also think there's a part of me that feels like she "owes" me for what I'm doing (despite her not knowing about it) and is quick to find ways that she's not "pulling her weight." And this big question about our future hangs over and colors everything, turning every slight and every misunderstanding into a referendum on our whole relationship.

Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Comics or Manga about tournament fighting?

robotdog — Wed, 07 May 2008 03:53:27 -0800

Can anyone recommend comic-books or manga that feature tournament-fighting or gladiator-fighting as the central setting/plot? Basically, I am looking for comics and manga that have stories that are similar to movies like Bloodsport, Karate Kid, the Rocky movies, Gladiator, etc...

...ideally they would feature an aspiring fighter and their quest to win the tournament or escape their slavery or some-such.

I am primarily looking for books that have this idea as the central concept to the entire title... i.e. I am not so interested in the fact that maybe there is an issue of X-Men that features a boxing match.

Planet Hulk is an okay match as it is collected as a TPB... but not a perfect match b/c it isn't really as focused on gladiator fighting as the synopsis makes it sound.

"Aye Carumba," cried Don Moopy

mu~ha~ha~ha~har — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 17:24:33 -0800

Cat collars. Ones that snap into action when in range of each other. Suggestions or better ideas most welcome. And of course I've included the whole exasperating tale for your consideration and/or amusement. Littermates Scruffy Girls and Loopy Schmickles. Out after 9am in by 4-4.30pm. (5.30-6pm at the latest for Scruff, on the odd occasion, if she's being a Haggis. Loopy is in before the bikkies land on the first shake - without fail.)

The Mean Cat seems to be entirely free range. Comes around at night to gobble up the cat grass. Jump at windows, circling the house in a reign of terror over it's inhabitants. Which to be honest is really a bit of excitment, isn't it? But it digs these big stupid holes in my garden. Which, when SO pointed out, were all in veiw of windows just made me laugh. Until I found one NOT near a window. I was like WTF! The hairy bastard made that one for me... That tears it. I'd like to catch that cat and say "Now look here Kitty, I don't know what goes on at your place, but from where we come from holes are for crappin' in! Not just diggin' about the place wherever you please! You got that!"

But really the problem is that Loopy is being increasingly savaged. (Unlike Scruff, he is The Chicken (-stealin') Boy) He's been rolled for his new collar. Attacked in his shade cloth hammock. The thing just gets him and puts all these nasty holes in my poor Loopy Schmickles. So I've been keeping him in, but it's not fair and bad for family harmony. Which is a perculiar type of music at the best of times.

I go outside but he goes off in search of mischief. I send Scruff with him but even if she's with him at the time, Mean Cat has given her a 'friendly' maul at least once (it's just much bigger) She does go to attempt his rescue though :)

SO alarmed me with the idea of 'taking care of it' until I pointed out that the owners (somebody at the bottom of the cul de sac? They will know at any rate) are quite likely unaware of the relentless torment Kitty is inflicting upon us. So I have bought it some time. It's lucky I'm partial to cats and not just ones that are mine...

A Cat Run. Yes, but for various reasons I'm putting that on hold for now (and this yard is a total snore.) I was going to kit him out in body armor with a samurai style helmet and a tail guard (Ahh, lateral thinking) Then my common sense kicked in. Of course collars!!

That when within X amount of feet or meters let off an alarm! Alerting me and sending both of them headed for home in a fright. I was thinking also an irritating buzz at a closer range might keep it occupied while Loopy makes a dash for safety, and escapes harm. SO wants to put some kind of shock. But I'm hesitant on that one. But have already decided if it comes to that the collars 'need maintainance' and it'll be going in.

It will need to be durable, waterproof, reliable, no maintainance on their part (it would ruin my presentation shpeil) And completely safe!!

We thought maybe like an electric door buzzer stuck down or radio frequency? Like walkie-talkies ect. But I remember as a kid we'd pick up trucks on them... GPS?

What do you guys think? Whacky ideas welcome. Completely different and/or better ideas are also acceptable. :)

How can I be a silent (and compact) ninja?

ajp — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 17:31:10 -0800

Having recently moved to a small flat with little outside space, my free-standing kick-boxing bag is of no use. Even if I had room to hurl myself at it, I'd annoy the neighbours. What sort of equipment can I use to practice Thai boxing and grappling at home? I'm surrounded by neighbours on 5 of 6 sides, and the 5th wall has precious little space for mounted equipment because there are windows in the walls. Anything I get will either need to be relatively unobtrusive, or easily stowed away. So far I'm thinking of investing in:

1. Grapple dummy.
2. One of those flat, wall-mounted sandbags for punching.
3. Elastic-mounted speed-ball for speed punching.

Does anyone have any experience of purchasing or using these things? Are those wall-mounted sandbags really bad for joints?

One real problem is how can I practice kicks? I'd prefer something that can take a good solid impact.

Any other suggestions? I have plenty of other kit (skipping rope, gloves, weights, Thai pads etc) and I do get to train in a gym, but I'm specifically interested in training I can do by myself, in my own lounge. I can mount things on one wall, possibly, but I really need to insulate whatever I'm using so the sound won't travel. I think a grapple man on a thick wrestling mat might be the best I can hope for. Shame I can't punch it without the lights falling out of the ceiling in the flat below.

Any creative suggestions most welcome :-)

How can I stop fighting?

Loto — Sun, 29 Apr 2007 23:42:21 -0800

So, last night I was ejected from yet another bar, and I think I need some help. In the past few months, I've been removed from about a half dozen bars for fighting. It started as a one off thing, and I still hold on to the idea that I had good reason for starting that fight but I was drunk and I may just be trying to justify it to myself after the fact. I'll just go out to the bar by myself to relax, and I end up picking a fight with a stranger. I was even kicked out of a diner for getting into a shouting match with some random guy also sitting at the counter. I am lucky that nothing criminal has ever been brought up against me. I don't know why I do this, though.

Academically, my year has been great. My grades are great. I fell in with a good group of people after having kept to myself for a long while. I have three good part-time jobs right now, am fitter than I have ever been, and my team is going to nationals. I still feel depressed at times, but over all I feel like I am doing well. Why am I trying to sabotage myself then? What can I do to stop this? I'm trying to see a shrink, but my school doesn't have any openings until the summer session starts so I have to wait a few weeks.

Drinking is the next obvious issue. I cut down my drinking a lot, as I was quite the binge drinker for a while. Last weekend was the first time I had been out in a long while. The thing is that two of my fights occurred sober, so I can't blame it completely on booze.

Does anyone have any experience with this? Has anyone beat something like this? How did you do it? I feel like (and have been told before) that I'm an incredibly nice and thoughtful guy. People don't believe me when I tell them where I was over the weekend, and they are incredulous when they see it occur. I don't want people to be afraid of me, as some of my friends have obviously become. I know this sounds pathetic, but please, any advice you have would be most welcome.

Help me distance myself from my family (and not feel guilty).

Anonymous — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 23:19:34 -0800

Help me distance myself from my family (and not feel guilty). I have struggled with depression for years. My mom alternates between "supportive" and putting in little digs about how helpless and unsuccesful I am. Long story short, I have begun to feel that my mother is invested in keeping me down.

My therapist has built up my ego to the point where I finally don't beat myself up about everything and I am able to stand up for myself a bit more. I am *finally* starting to feel...well...sorta good! However, this has made me even more incompatible with my family (esp. mom) than I ever was before. Just talking to her usually puts me in a bad mood. It reminds me just how invalidating she was my whole life.

I fantasize about cutting off all contact but I doubt I would ever be able to do so. Yet they (mom especially) are extremely toxic. Although well meaning, I feel they don't validate me, my feelings or my choices. Quite the opposite.

How can I put more distance between us? How can I put the brake on my mom's "helpful" (underminging) comments and behavior?

Addt'l info: My mom truly is impossible; with my siblings, I think the issue is more a disatisfaction about the relationship not being what I wish it would be. For example, we don't talk often, aren't really close, and I don't feel very understood by them. This makes me feel really sad and disappointed when I talk to them..

Why not six bells? Eight?

pdb — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 16:00:26 -0800

Where did the phrase "beat seven bells" (out of someone) come from? I was listening to the excellent Guardian Unlimited Football podcast last week, and one of the commentators was talking about a recent kerfuffle between Craig Bellamy and John Arne Riise, and he said that Bellamy proceeded to "beat seven bells out of Riise".

I've heard this phrase before, and I love it - but I have no idea what its origins are. My Google skills turned up nothing of consequence - does anybody have any idea where this comes from?

Why don't fighter planes have backwards pointing guns?

names are hard — Sat, 23 Dec 2006 14:16:05 -0800

Why don't fighter jets (in real life or in those classic movies) have backwards pointing guns and missiles to shoot down their chasing adversaries in dog-fights? I'm thinking in movies like Top Gun. When they are in the air fighting often one plane is chasing another one trying to shoot it down. The chased plane just tries to get away. But why couldn't they have backwards pointing guns or missile launchers to luck onto their enemy?

Smack Smack Blam Blam

cyrusdogstar — Tue, 17 Oct 2006 15:48:37 -0800

Trying to find a Flash game that I played a good couple of years ago. It was one of your average sidescrolling fighting games, pitting you against a bunch of baddies, with the somewhat unique catch that nobody had any arms, just hands. The control scheme consisted of mouse movement--the player's primary hand aims in the direction your cursor is in relative to his current position, and you either click to fire a gun (if you have one equipped) or move his hand back and then whip it forward (if he has a melee weapon equipped...I think there were knives and bats, at least).

Killing enemies usually resulted in weapon drops; I think there was also a jet-pack you could get later on; I don't think there was a lot of platforming involved, it was mostly just fighting on the ground level, although the backgrounds did scroll; that's about it. I think it was fairly bloody. The graphics were all right, definitely better than the average crappy Flash game that you find on e.g. albinoblacksheep.com.

I've Googled as best I can for something this vague, and searched through the contents of the 'flash+games' tags on the Blue and didn't find it, although to be honest I have no idea if I found it via MeFi or some other venue (I looked around a bit on aforementioned Albino Blacksheep to no avail).

Smooch

Skyanth — Sun, 01 Oct 2006 09:30:26 -0800

Hello hivemind! Does anyone know a place where you can find of traditional japanese ukiyo-e such as this only much bigger and with a bigger resolution? The idea is to have a /lot/ of fighting samurai. Thankyouverymuch you're all such lovely people. Kisses!

Why are boys so physical?

LadyBonita — Tue, 23 May 2006 07:49:51 -0800

Boys! And their manifestation of physical energy + why do they have a love/hate relationship with trying to kill each other? I am a mother of all boys and I'd like to understand their behavior better. Sometimes I'm concerned about the way they behave with each other and not sure where/when/if/how to set limits. My husband always tries to calm me down with "that's just the way boys are and need to be."

So I'm curious, and would love some insight on young male behavior. Our boys are close, they show lots of affection towards each other, they defend one another - yet nearly every day they seem to also wish to kill each other. What is going on?

For example - they will put each other in choke holds, laugh uproarishly, throw each other to the ground, wrestle, laugh, chase each other - then 5 minutes late one of them is furious about the very same actions (choking, wrestling, etc.) - and the real fight and angry tears begin. I don't understand this, and I'm beginning to dread when they start this physcial 'playfulness'.

Same thing happens when they wrestle around with Dad - all laughter and fun until someone (boy) gets mad about something - and then I have to deal with the fallout.

Also, every evening between dinner and preparing for bed, they seem to have a huge surge of physical energy - running, jumping, generally being very physcial - this time of day doesn't always lead to a fight but I'm curious about why it happens.

I'm wondering if this is proper behavior to allow, if it should be tempered somehow, if it's just normal boy behavior that shouldn't be stiffled. It just doesn't seem very civilized to me and makes me feel nervous.

Some background - I was raised with all girls (and Dad), we didn't have very many hair pulling, slapping fights. We were affectionate and physically gentle with each other (my sons are more likely to give me a light punch in the arm than to give me a hug - though they do hug).

My husband was raised with all brothers, single hardworking, tough-minded mother, absent father. He claims he and his brothers acted the same and even much worse (and they've all turned out to be well-mannered upstanding citizens).

And the boys are much different when alone - more calm. It seems as if things begin to get more physically 'active' when more than one boy is together. They behave well in public but I've seen this same physical stuff start up when they meet a friend while we're out.

Any insights for me?

Why do I get angry with people close to me and how do I stop?

Anonymous — Sun, 21 May 2006 19:55:34 -0800

Why do I pick fights with people close to me and how can I stop? I'm not like this with friends, just relatives and S.O. I am a nice person to friends and strangers. I'm often complimented on my laid back friendly nature and my ability to stay even keeled at all times. But somehow with my parents, siblings, and boyfriend, I am very quick to get angry and pick fights. I've been this way my entire life. My parents NEVER fought in front of me, but I use to fight with my siblings a lot and throw tantrums. Now as an adult I still do this. I pick fights with my parents and siblings quite easily when I am around them in person (one time a year). And with my live-in boyfriend, I pick fights with him, get easily angry, and throw mini tantrums. One of these things happens about one a week. I'm like Dr. Jeckel and Mr. Hyde. Why would I do this? I want to stop. I don't have a normal relationship with anyone. PS, I have ADD but keep it very controlled in my public life (people usually are shocked to hear that I have ADD.)