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1710 posts tagged with family.
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How do I learn to live on my own?

I've never been close to either of my parents and was really only close to one set of grandparents. Well, the last of my grandparents died recently and I'm rapidly realizing just how alone I am. How do I come to terms with this? How do I proceed in having a happy and successful life in the knowledge that I'm really without a safety net? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 17, 2014 - 8 answers

Away We Go - Grandparents Included!

My partner and I are pregnant and looking for a place to make our permanent home. The sitch? My parents are coming with us. And while we think it's pretty awesome of them, it's making location hunting that much more complicated. [more inside]
posted by givennamesurname on Feb 15, 2014 - 19 answers

How to love the hater?

What should I do about the bigotry of close family members? [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Feb 15, 2014 - 18 answers

Living with a Family Mental Illness

My younger brother has been living with a schizophrenia-like mental illness for about a year. It's hard for me to interact with him. I'm looking for perspectives from those who've had loved ones with mental illnesses, and books or other resources that will help me better relate to him. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 15, 2014 - 13 answers

I'm doing the "right" thing but I feel trapped and resentful.

I am watching my stepson's daughter every other weekend and I don't want to anymore. [more inside]
posted by cherrybounce on Feb 12, 2014 - 37 answers

GSOH is killing my love life.

My stepson revealed the greatest stressors in his life is my self-deprecating sense of humor. What can I say? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 10, 2014 - 53 answers

Mother got a job in my workplace behind my back.

I have been working a steady job at a fairly close-knit company for about 3 years, and was recently promoted. My mother applied behind my back and got a job in the same company. We do not get along. Should I quit? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 7, 2014 - 31 answers

Estranged parents threatening to call police

I'd just like opinions on how to handle the potential situation of a police officer and relative showing up at my apartment at the request of other family members. More relevant details inside: [more inside]
posted by velebita on Feb 4, 2014 - 18 answers

How to respond to this kind of venting/anger?

How do you respond to family members venting/unloading on you? This past week, my mother and I kept playing phone tag, which culminated in her blowing up at me. I am sick of repeating this behavior pattern. Pertinent details: [more inside]
posted by nakedmolerats on Jan 29, 2014 - 35 answers

Oh brother, don't hate me

I've decided to skip my brother's wedding, for very good reasons. Help me figure out how to talk to him about this - it gets long, sorry. [more inside]
posted by guessthis on Jan 27, 2014 - 62 answers

Do I completely change my family's life for a dream job opportunity?

I have been offered a dream career position. All signs indicate that I will excel at the job, and in a few years I may be in a technical leadership position with amazing potential and significant rewards. However, it will require my wife and I to move across the country, away from family and friends. How do we make such a difficult choice? [more inside]
posted by RobotNinja on Jan 26, 2014 - 46 answers

Family of three, two last names. Problem?

When I got married I never changed my last name. We're pregnant now (yay!), and thinking the baby will have my last name. Dad will likely big picking kiddo up from daycare/school a lot and we'll be traveling internationally a lot (Oz-US). How big a deal is it if dad has a different surname? [more inside]
posted by jrobin276 on Jan 25, 2014 - 43 answers

I feel like I’m not good enough. How can I battle my depression

I’m a 25 year old female and have been going through a lot of depression over the past year, mostly in the areas of finance and romance. [more inside]
posted by summertimesadness1988 on Jan 25, 2014 - 19 answers

choose: job and lifestyle OR friends and family

Which would you choose: a great job and lifestyle OR being close to your family and friends? Especially if you really can't have both at the same time...? [more inside]
posted by elizamina on Jan 25, 2014 - 33 answers

Dealing with stress and comparmentalization.

Problems with the SO, family acting irrationally and Career in a turbulent state. Help me find a way of dealing with the stress! [more inside]
posted by perspicaturous on Jan 23, 2014 - 13 answers

Wedding gift for the adult sister I'm just getting to know

At age 43, I found my birth family. (Original post. MeTa.) In addition to my birth mother and many other relatives, I've gained an adult sister. I'm now 44 and she's 29. We're slowly getting to know each other. My birth mother informed me the day we met last June that I'd be going to my sister's (up until then her only daughter, as far as the world knew) wedding in Key West in March. I was so thrilled by the whirlwind of everything, and I wanted to keep the hoopla surrounding my integration into the family as minimally disruptive to her planning the big event, that I've kind of forgotten something important until now: What on earth should I get her as a wedding present? [more inside]
posted by ImproviseOrDie on Jan 17, 2014 - 28 answers

How do I decide if I want us to have a baby?

I'm having a difficult time deciding whether I want my wife and I to get pregnant. She is very into it, but I have mixed feelings. How do I decide if I'm ready? [more inside]
posted by jsharke on Jan 14, 2014 - 60 answers

Help clueless future parents buy the right home to raise kids in!

As future parents and first time homebuyers, what aren't we thinking about, or under-emphasizing/over-emphasizing, in trying to pick a home to raise (two) kids in?  What should we consider in deciding on house versus condo, location, neighborhood, size, layout, features, etc? [more inside]
posted by EmilyClimbs on Jan 10, 2014 - 36 answers

Mentally unstable sister, I fear for her young children

Background: My sister (38) has a story of emotional instability and I fear for my niece (8) and baby nephew (Down syndrome). My sister was molested by my father when she was in her late teens, which might have something to do with her current condition. She is extremely dependent on (and at the same time very hostile to) my mother. My mother (divorced, late 60s), in turn, is struggling all by herself to help her daughter and the little children, while having to deal with lack of money and her own (physical) health issues. [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Jan 8, 2014 - 16 answers

Important aspects of planning for your family

Hi all, Belated Happy New Year everyone! I am a 32yr old single mother of a beautiful 1yr old, and this year I’ve decided to plan ahead to help me fulfill my parenthood responsibilities to the best. We are a US middle-class family of two. Originally not from this country, I need to research several important aspects of planning for a future here. I hope to get some useful suggestions from those of you who are savvy about these things :-) [more inside]
posted by Spice_and_Ice on Jan 6, 2014 - 15 answers

SO's Sick mother- not sure how to deal with her asking my SO to move in

I come from an abusive family where illness was often used an an excuse to mistreat people. For example, my mother would emotionally abuse my father and I and then say it was because she was sick and that we had to learn to deal with it. My SO just moved from another city to be with me and two months in his mother is asking him to move back home for her hip replacement surgery "until she can drive." I am finding this very stressful. [more inside]
posted by ponytime on Jan 6, 2014 - 34 answers

How can I create a healthy relationship with my soon-to-be stepmother?

My dad is getting married to a woman with whom he's had a very tumultuous, difficult relationship. They are moving across the country together, and I'm scared. Lots more details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 5, 2014 - 25 answers

Do I tell my wife that I have a child with someone else?

A long time ago, I asked this question. Since, I learned that it is most likely my child, but the mother does not wish for me to play a role in his upbringing. I made the promise I would keep it between the two of us, but my wife demands to know what is going on. [more inside]
posted by Bathtub Bobsled on Dec 31, 2013 - 59 answers

Should I cut off contact with parents who have dysfunctional marriage?

For as long as I can remember, my parents have nasty arguments with each other every few days, including shouting, harsh words, put-downs at each other. When I was a child, they involved me in their marital strife, and I feel damaged from it. I am now in my 30s. I've tried years of therapy for myself to learn how to not be bothered, but I am still very bothered. I want to reduce my contact with them to just occasional phone calls, but I am scared that we'll become estranged and they'll die, and then I'll regret it. Advice from MeFites who have reduced their contact with their parents? [more inside]
posted by cheesecake on Dec 29, 2013 - 24 answers

Ashes - Splitting After Cremation

Ashes taken against both the letter and spirit of the dead's wishes. [more inside]
posted by Talez on Dec 27, 2013 - 10 answers

Can you drink every day and not be an alcoholic?

Where is the line between drinking-is-my-hobby and alcoholism? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 27, 2013 - 44 answers

Abusive family seems to know where I live. What do I do?

My abusive mom that I cut off ties with (along with the rest of my abusive family) emailed me a few days ago and seems to know where I moved to. She said that she tells everyone back home where I moved to. She made it sound like she just guessed it, but I find it highly unlikely. If it wasn't just a guess, I don't know how they found out (since I haven't contacted them since arriving in my new city) or how much they know. Am I in danger? Should I move? What do I do? Please help. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 23, 2013 - 41 answers

How can I engage in better conversation and avoid boredom?

I'm tired of dreading large social gatherings where I am bored/bore people. How do I step up my game and engage people in conversation such that it is enjoyable and interesting for all involved? I want to avoid small talk. Please give me tips, tricks, mantras to make it better! [more inside]
posted by kendrak on Dec 22, 2013 - 28 answers

How to interact with an unfamiliar new resident in my parents home?

A lovely, college-aged young woman who has had a very rough year is coming to live with my parents, whom I visit several times a year, often for extended periods of time (I live 900 miles away, but I'm a student with long vacations). I think this is great. However, I feel a little at sea for how to interact with her, and to prepare for this change, especially given the giant elephant in the room: the horrible event that happened which has caused her to need a new home. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 17, 2013 - 31 answers

Someone is intentionally attacking me & my family online.

Someone has created a site via Google Sites that is radically defaming myself and my family. We're not talking about a 12 year playing a prank. It's a systematic attack with the most egregious accusations one can imagine. They're parroting my personal business site and posting info that is not only libelous, but fantastically horrible. The junk they've posted about myself, my wife and our two small children is heartbreaking. We believe we know who it is (but have no proof) and have contacted the FBI on advice of a lawyer. They've told us they'll call us once they get jurisdiction figured out and the cybercrime guys take a look. The kind SAIC looked at the site and understood the problem but only got the ball in motion. That could take weeks/months for them to move on this and the site needs to come down, now. HOW? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 17, 2013 - 19 answers

Unexpected TEENAGE guest for the holidays?

Both my niece (16 yrs old) and her father (my brother - 37 yrs old) conveniently "forgot" to tell me that her 18 year old boyfriend would be coming to our family Christmas. They will be staying in MY house and did not ask for permission for the boyfriend to stay, nor did they ask myself or my mother (Grandma) permission for an outsider to come to the family Christmas. The kid already has a plane ticket and I honestly don't believe it's his fault - I 100% blame my brother and my niece. So, it's sort of too late - he's coming. But what do I say to them to let them know that I am FURIOUS but it's the holidays so I'll do my bloody best to be HOSPITABLE and FUN and CHEERY but that this is seriously NOT OKAY with me? [more inside]
posted by athena2255 on Dec 16, 2013 - 113 answers

Family board games for adults and little kids

This holiday season, I'm thinking about giving the gift of board games. Most of my friends (adults in their 30s - 50s) have little kids (2-6 years old). Do you have any board game recommendations for a family with kids around that age, that everyone can play together? Card games, or heck any other games are good, too. Thanks!
posted by lillygog on Dec 16, 2013 - 33 answers

Make a trip to see elderly relatives, even if she caused odd mini-drama?

Should we make plans to drive several hours and stay in a hotel, after flying across the country with our young kids (who'll be ages 6.5 and 4.5) next Spring, so that they can meet my husband's elderly relatives, with whom he has always had very good relationships... that is, until his octogenarian Grandmother said something to him over the phone that caused my husband to suddenly have a strong negative/ambivalent reaction to the whole idea? [more inside]
posted by hush on Dec 16, 2013 - 46 answers

Me and You and That Guy

I can't stand my sister's boyfriend. He's coming for Christmas. They're inseparable. Now what? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 14, 2013 - 47 answers

How to stop my father's rages (or at least their effect on me)?

Throughout my life, my father has had anger issues, typically directed at me. Although he isn't violent, he will become extremely (almost uncontrollably) angry whenever I do anything 'wrong'. Now that I'm an adult and no longer financially dependent on him, I want to stop this cycle. However, I'm having trouble figuring out how to do this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 11, 2013 - 63 answers

So apparently my family is publicly bragging about our child abuse now?

So I log onto facebook for the first time in weeks today and see my brother has posted this image and my mother has "liked" it. Nothing that was done to us as kids would qualify as spanking (punched in the side of the head very often, welts on skin, bruises, dad threatening my sister with a kitchen knife, holding us off the ground by our necks, locking us in the bathroom and hitting us for half an hour for eating the wrong yoghurt from the fridge, knocked over if we ever spoke back to them etc). My brother was actually very rarely hit and it stopped altogether when mum threatened to divorce dad after he hit my brother badly one time. (No such luck for us girls though). I'm SO ANGRY right now and want to react but don't know how it would improve anything. I feel like I'm being goaded but am trapped in how I handle this, with it being a public forum all my friends can see. Please Mefi help me stay calm and do this right (even if that means doing nothing). [more inside]
posted by everydayanewday on Dec 10, 2013 - 39 answers

My, what big eyes you have

Having trouble with a visiting relative, do I confront or just avoid? [more inside]
posted by readygo on Dec 7, 2013 - 36 answers

JobFilter: help me choose

Choice 1. Tech startup - smart people, legitimate prospects, lots of autonomy, good upside, exciting work. Choice 2. Young but growing company - #5 with a bullet in their industry, much lower risk, 15% higher pay, potentially boring work [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2013 - 22 answers

Amtrak - Xmas travel from NYC to DC with infant and luggage

Questions on Christmas Amtrak travel from NYC to D.C (how busy and what's the deal with luggage?) for a small family who has never traveled Amtrak before. [more inside]
posted by inflatablekiwi on Dec 2, 2013 - 15 answers

How do I respond to this?

I just received a probably inappropriate and drunken, certainly meddling message on FB from someone I don't know, but who has connections to my family. [more inside]
posted by RedEmma on Dec 2, 2013 - 25 answers

Fiction featuring Thanksgiving gatherings?

What are some examples of works of fiction (e.g. novels, movies) that feature a Thanksgiving family gathering as a major plot element? [more inside]
posted by Asparagus on Nov 30, 2013 - 21 answers

Help us move without too much chaos!

We are making a local move (less than a mile) to a new house. When my husband and I moved into our current 4-bedroom house 14 years ago, it was the two of us coming from a small two-bedroom apartment with not much stuff - I packed it all, had movers, and it was done in a day. This is not that move. Please share your tips and tricks for moving a big, complicated household! [more inside]
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse on Nov 30, 2013 - 19 answers

forgiveness

How do you know when you've truly forgiven someone? How do you let go of old pain when you've long ago forgiven the person who caused it? Is it possible to truly forgive someone but still not want them in your life? [more inside]
posted by evil otto on Nov 30, 2013 - 21 answers

How to stay sane spending the holidays with my bigoted parents

How to stay sane spending the holidays with my bigoted parents [more inside]
posted by GorgeousPorridge on Nov 29, 2013 - 35 answers

New Year's Day in San Francisco

I'm spending New Year's in San Francisco so my partner and I can get married (no gay marriage allowed in Montana, so we're headed to the home state of both our families). We plan to be there with our parents and siblings for the event, but are not sure what to do with ourselves on the day of the 1st. [more inside]
posted by ikahime on Nov 27, 2013 - 9 answers

Staying at Land of a Thousand Cleaning Products

My family spends most holidays at the home of a family member with untreated OCD. It’s already a huge challenge, and I’ve discovered it’s slightly worse than I’d thought. Will solve an immediate problem temporarily, but won’t see my therapist until after Thanksgiving. Please just help me to not go nuclear this week. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 27, 2013 - 40 answers

National Lampoon's European Vacation Moocher

What's the age cutoff to expect to be able to tag along with your parents on a vacation? [more inside]
posted by Sara C. on Nov 25, 2013 - 34 answers

Help Me Figure Out the Best Finanacial Strategy

I'm unexpectedly broke. How do I get cash to use now, and a way to pay tuition and living expenses soon -- with the least risk of ending up in this situation again? [more inside]
posted by rue72 on Nov 21, 2013 - 19 answers

What steps can I take to meet a family orientated partner?

I'm an early 30s male, I have spent the last few years living a very self-centered life, hopping around short term casual relationships. I recently had a change of priorities, and want to prioritise starting a family. The gist of the question is about compromise. What kind of traits should be prioritised in a partner? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 18, 2013 - 37 answers

Alcoholism and the holidays

How do I navigate this family dysfunction around an alcoholic at Thanksgiving and Christmas? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 13, 2013 - 18 answers

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